Anonymous wrote:

ZachF wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So ... my husband is a pretty laid back guy, very little phases him. Generally a good thing, and definitely one of the reasons I married him. He, however, doesn't seem to care or worry about or even really acknowledge that Trump's policies are detrimental to this country. He's a very caring guy towards me, but doesn't seem to care about people beyond myself and his family and close friends. It's really really disappointing to see this. I have actually found myself less attracted to him lately. Any advice on how to get over this? We just got married last year.

Who else is he supposed to care about as much as you, his family, and his close friends? Why should he share your exact political beliefs about Trump and the future of our country? Maybe he doesn't feel the need to worry and, unlike you, doesn't spend his time with anxiety about things he can't change instead of focusing on the people closest to him.

Do you talk his ear off about Trump every day? Seriously question? Is there a day you haven't mentioned Trump to him? Could you go a week without getting political and just focus on him, and your family and close friends? If you can't, then it's not him that has a problem.

If you don't stop, he is the one who is going to find you less attractive if you can't stop yammering about Trump and all your fears that you have let effect your relationship with the guy who loved you enough to marry you. I pray he doesn't have to put up with that for 4 more long years.

Oh great, it makes women less attractive to be yammering on about Trump. Nice. Maybe OP's husband should validate her feelings, which have been expressed by millions of people.

I'm glad you understand. Anyone is less attractive if they are so concerned about a politician, even the president, that they let it effect their marriage in a bad way.

Anonymous wrote:So ... my husband is a pretty laid back guy, very little phases him. Generally a good thing, and definitely one of the reasons I married him. He, however, doesn't seem to care or worry about or even really acknowledge that Trump's policies are detrimental to this country. He's a very caring guy towards me, but doesn't seem to care about people beyond myself and his family and close friends. It's really really disappointing to see this. I have actually found myself less attracted to him lately. Any advice on how to get over this? We just got married last year.

Who else is he supposed to care about as much as you, his family, and his close friends? Why should he share your exact political beliefs about Trump and the future of our country? Maybe he doesn't feel the need to worry and, unlike you, doesn't spend his time with anxiety about things he can't change instead of focusing on the people closest to him.

Do you talk his ear off about Trump every day? Seriously question? Is there a day you haven't mentioned Trump to him? Could you go a week without getting political and just focus on him, and your family and close friends? If you can't, then it's not him that has a problem.

If you don't stop, he is the one who is going to find you less attractive if you can't stop yammering about Trump and all your fears that you have let effect your relationship with the guy who loved you enough to marry you. I pray he doesn't have to put up with that for 4 more long years.

Anonymous wrote:I do not want to have to struggle as I am trying to raise my children. It is important to me that I can be home with them and give them everything they need and deserve.

I want to marry a man who can be a good provider and is okay with me putting the children first.

What should be my game plan?

Do engineers make good husbands?

They are gone from home a long time. When they are home, they bore you to tears with train stories but they do wear really cool hats.

If you marry him now, you marry a man that you know are marrying a weak man who will always put his family first, over you. Get married knowing that will always be the case, or don't. Just don't think it will ever change or that family will ever like you.

Anonymous wrote:WTF is wrong with the OP showing gratitude to her boyfriend by wanting to have sex or slobbering on his knob?

Maybe boyfreind was sore from working on the washer, or hands were dirty, or needed to get some rest since he had to be up early the next morning.

I've played handyman in past relationships so many times fixing everything from cars to kitchen appliances, plumbing, painting, etc. We always played the: poor single mother can't afford the bill, can we make some kind of alternative arrangement, game. Just as fun when the deed is offered before services are rendered.

It's not sex for hire. It's not a poor woman with little self-respect whoring herself out to get her dishwasher fixed. It's playful, sexy fun within a relationship where sex is freely given and enjoyed at any time and couples use their unique skill sets to help each other wherever they can.

Who knows why he didn't want to play along. I'm sure if he turned it down right after fixing the dishwasher, he won't turn it down later. Make the same offer again but don't mention his fixing the dishwasher or the word, payment and I'm sure he will go for it.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Four years of a sexless marriage and finally took an AP. And I'm over the moon.
Feeling like a sexual being again has been very empowering and liberating.

How did you meet AP?

Through work when I travel. We are both married and don't want to blow up our families, just want to feel alive and sexual again.

Sorry but time seems to blow up the "happy" marriages affairs cannot sustain without the truth eventually coming out but good luck to you if it works - I love married men I just don't like their wives they always seem to make the affairs complicated

I know .. the nerve of the wives to actually expect their husbands to be faithful, and to commit to a simple, non-sexual life of honoring your vows.

Fixed that for you. That really is the expectation sometimes with either sex as we've read here so many times. Remain faithful, and allow me to decide for you that your sex life is over. You're right, it's simple. Not workable for many, but simple.

Anonymous wrote:My husband has the worst gas in the world. He can make the entire room stink for hours. He is lactose-intolerant but refuses to stop drinking milk, eating ice cream, and cheese. He laughs it off, and joking says sorry, but it makes me not even want to be around him. One day after picking up my son from school there was this horrible sewer smell and my son asked if it was daddy. I have asked him not to drink milkshakes and he gets mad. I don't think he realizes how horrible it smells. I've suggested he see a doctor but he also refuses. I don't know what to do, he complains I don't give him enough affection but when he smells like that I don't want anywhere near him.

There is your answer. Tell him that as directly as you wrote it here. Make him understand it's a choice he has to make.

Anonymous wrote:This is how date rapists are created. Parents teaching their kids that they're entitled to whatever/whomever they want, that women don't know what's best for them, that they are prizes to be collected. What a gross post, OP.

Maybe you should take him to the woman's march.

OMG, can't someone work in the word, gaslighting somewhere in this thread. That's all that's missing now. What a huge leap from a kid asking his mom advice about dating, to creating the next rapist.

The girl is fair game but he should be a gentleman and insist she end it with the other guy, assuming the interest is mutual.

Anonymous wrote:How dumb are you OP

He's really dumb. There is a words to sex ratio and you are in a word deficit as she told you. What more do you need to know? You just started a relationship with sex on the third date and now think you can ignore her for several days? It's amusing how clueless you are.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Pp, a friend of mine almost killed himself (now brain damaged) when he found out his father, who he admired, was having an affair. So, kids get hurt.

My suggestion was that it was how the parents handled the affair that made or broke the children of the marriage. I'd be interested to know how his parents handled (ie, how did he find out, how did his mom react, were the parents still Coparenting or was it world War 3?

Pahleeze! Let's try to intellectualize sleaze. He was the one who came home early and saw his father kissing the other woman in the laundry room. How the hell do you handle that?

I saw my mom making out with Santa Clause. Then they made a song about it. I'm still pretty messed up.

It does annoy me. That said, anyone who wants to do the dishes can do it any damn they they like.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Monkey see monkey do. Monkey gets run over. So do you.

Another irritating thing, starting off saying so. EX. I saw you at the park. Where were you headed after ? So I was like going shopping. What did you buy ? So I bought a bag of rocks. Why did you buy a bag of rocks ? So like I could look smarter.

I hate followers. Don't be a follower.

What does this even mean?

It means they find it annoying when people start a sentence with so.

Person #1: Where did you go after work?
Person #2 : So I went to the store, and like bought a bag of rocks. So then I went to the bakery. So, what are you doing next?

That's not really it. Up talk is ending nearly every sentence with the same inflection as if it were a question, when it's not. If I said, "you know what I mean?" That would be appropriate to end with a bit of an up note, as it is a question. But really annoying people end any sentence, or all sentences with the same questioning inflection, when there is no question. It sounds like they are questioning themselves. Listen to Kato Kaelin, OJ Simpson's housemate talking. He can't talk at all without doing it and it makes him sound like such an idiot.

Vocal fry is totally different, but just as annoying. It's a kind of "frying," if you will, of usually the last word. But it could could be the first or any other word in a sentence. Like the boss in, Office Space." Yeahhhhhh, if you could just go ahead and come ...Sunday also, that would be Greaaaattt. Porn stars do it too because someone told them it's supposed to sound sexy. The lead girl character on "Mr. Robot" does it also. His sister, I forget the name.

Anonymous wrote:OP here, thanks all for the feedback. Now I feel crappy about what I texted to him. Men try to hit on me a lot but this is the first man I've felt such instant, strong chemistry with...that might be part of my problem, it made me more anxious.

I was married for over 25 years, so I did well at maintaining a relationship over decades but obviously I'm clueless about modern dating. Clear communication was a key to the long marriage but we already knew each other well, different from a new date.

Some of the comments have helped me to see where I've gone wrong with this one and how do do better. I'll put this one down to messing up my first real dating experience since my divorce and I think that next time I won't make similar mistakes.

Text him a photo of your cleavage, bra still on and text, "can you take this off for me?". That will fix everything.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:a couple I know gave a hall pass to each other 4 months ago. They seem to have a very good relationship, in love, have sex and all, but have been together for 20 years (met at 18) and they both feel like they would be fine with the other experimenting as long as they didn't hear about it.

I know the wife has acted on it already. She is the one who asked for it. and that's because she had a crush on someone, kissed that person already but didn't want to go further without first getting "pre approval". so for people who say "when he/she offers a HP it is because he/she cheats" there seems to be some truth to it.

she was surprised her husband accepted so easily. Now I wonder if he has someone . I am watching them experiment with this with a lot of interest. would love to see it work...

remember the 100+ pages of the "Wolf" (maybe a couple of years ago). be careful what you wish/ask for.

Larla, I'm going to need the link for that! Thanks, doll!

http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/357557.page