Dating etiquete - what next?
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Anonymous
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I posted before that a man had asked me on a date, I agreed to meet him but added that it was not a date. It seems he took that as a rejection. Following wise advice I called him, said that I hadn't intended to reject him with my last text. He put me at ease, we chatted a bit, he said he likes me and at the end he asked me when could we meet for the date? We had a lunch date the next day and it was so much fun! He asked to see me again and I agreed. It's obvious to both of us that we like each other a lot. Since then we've talked and/or texted at least twice every day. I'm excited about seeing him.
Yesterday our phone conversation started with talking about families, interests etc and ended with flirting and a really steamy chat, which was fun. During one of our chats I mentioned that I'm interested in a potential LTR, not hooking up. Today he sent me a racy text that would have been okay during our steamy talk but unexpectedly in a text I didn't like it and I told him that. Then I had to go so I politely ended the chat. Our next date is supposed to be dinner followed by a movie this weekend. Is it possible he's decided to cancel that without telling me? Maybe he'll contact me tomorrow to confirm? This short time has had really fun moments but there are issues with texting that I either don't do well or don't understand the etiquette. When I dated before my former marriage, there was no texting available so no risk of texting blunders on either side. I'm taking the approach now or wait and see. Any advice, dos and don'ts about texting a date in a new relationship, that I need to know? |
Anonymous
| You sound high maintenance. |
Anonymous
+1 |
Anonymous
| There's being honest and straightforward, and then there's squelching his attempts to connect: "No, it's not a date." "Sexy talk is fun in this context but unacceptable in that context." |
Anonymous
| You're giving red light, green light signals, I think. He's got to be confused. |
Anonymous
| If you don't like something, ignoring it and not responding to it can be the way to go some times. |
Anonymous
| You're very dramatic, and you enjoy the drama. You're not going to do well in today's dating world. |
Anonymous
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You suck at texting, both sending and receiving.
Stick to face-to-face communication. |
Anonymous
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hopefully he's moved on ... I know I would.
Remember: you're a dime a dozen. |
Anonymous
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Chastising and correcting is not meant to be done via text. Be considerate of his ego. You didn't need to tell him you disintegrated consider it a date. If the text was really that big of a deal, you should have said it more gently and in person. If he complained about the texts you sent during the racy chat, wouldn't it be upsetting to you?
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Anonymous
| Auto correct went a little crazy. Disintegrated = don't. |
Anonymous
+1 If you are uncomfortable with something then I don't think it's good to squelch your feelings but there's a way to do this gracefully, and at the right time, without alienating or chastising him (unless he is being really crass or offensive -- but I'm sending it was just a continuation of your prior conversation?). You can use humor, or bring it up again in the next steamy moment, i.e. "I'm better at this when we're in a steamy moment. I feel more inhibited with text. It's certainly not disinterest". Keep it light! Of course, if he continues to make you uncomfortable in this way then that's another issue. But correcting/shutting it down, then politely getting off the phone? Ouch. |
Anonymous
| Btw - have you heard from him? |
Anonymous
| Like living inside your head? |
Anonymous
| You sound really annoying and I am a woman. Did you never flirt via AIM or email? Or may you just suck at flirting period. |