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She’s tired. Can’t he just service himself?
Of course she's tired. She's pregnant. They're almost synonymous
He's also extra tired from doing all the housework OP can't do. It's not the same level but but that doesn't invalidate his feelings.
DH doesn't have the right to endless sex without consideration of how his wife feels, but don't forget that OP likes her husband's high sex drive! He could just service himself, but it's not the same. DH wants the sexual connection with his wife. There's nothing wrong with that. DW wants to please her husband that she loves by letting him down easily. IMO that's a pretty cool thing too. They just need to find a happy medium until the post-surgical recovery period is over, then it's back to what sounds like a very satisfying normal sex life
A few thoughts from a couple that went through the same thing 20 years ago...
It is crucial that you tell him how you're feeling and keep him in the loop as to how you're feeling each day. He seems to be very understanding, but he's not a mind reader
I'm sure he's intellectually aware that it's not about him, but remind him anyway just in case he having a bad day. We men are more fragile than we seem.
Don't feel bad for how you're feeling. You're growing another human being inside of you. That's hard work!
Pregnant women are sexy!
Even though DH sounds like an amazing man, he still has sexual needs. Not necessarily a need for sex, but for a sexual release. BJs and HJs are very useful tools to get through tough times.
Don't forget this lack of desire is temporary. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
Did I mention that pregnant women are sexy?
Hang in there!
Feel free to PM if you want to.
It is crucial that you tell him how you're feeling and keep him in the loop as to how you're feeling each day. He seems to be very understanding, but he's not a mind reader
I'm sure he's intellectually aware that it's not about him, but remind him anyway just in case he having a bad day. We men are more fragile than we seem.
Don't feel bad for how you're feeling. You're growing another human being inside of you. That's hard work!
Pregnant women are sexy!
Even though DH sounds like an amazing man, he still has sexual needs. Not necessarily a need for sex, but for a sexual release. BJs and HJs are very useful tools to get through tough times.
Don't forget this lack of desire is temporary. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
Did I mention that pregnant women are sexy?
Hang in there!
Feel free to PM if you want to.
If I was attracted to her I would ask her out. Assuming I knew her history beforehand, it wouldn't affect my decision one bit.
I am actually turned on by the thought of being with powerful women, so for myself the answer is "no".
As for other men, I haven't brought up the topic in conversation with my guy friends, so I can't comment from first-hand knowledge, but it seems to me that a stereotype like this one doesn't get started without at least a few guys feeling this way.
As for other men, I haven't brought up the topic in conversation with my guy friends, so I can't comment from first-hand knowledge, but it seems to me that a stereotype like this one doesn't get started without at least a few guys feeling this way.
I read somewhere that men think about sex as often as women struggle with their self esteem. This helped me understand women on a whole new level. Maybe it will give the women reading this thread a little more insight about men.
It reads well as is, but the changes PP suggested would make it better.
Would you like to get a drink sometime and see if there's any chemistry?
PM me
Would you like to get a drink sometime and see if there's any chemistry?
PM me
Anonymous wrote:Actually, I think my younger self had it right when it comes to dating/relationships.
Friendships are a different story. There's a lot I'd like to tell my younger self about trusting other people.
I think I had a pretty good understanding of men and dating. I didn't follow a lot of traditional advice. I had a lot of interesting dating/relationship experiences, and honestly, I don't think I'd change a thing about them. I have no regrets in that regard.
But friendships are different, and I think I have never been good understanding women (I am a woman). I also think that society kind of drills it into women to be wary of men when dating, but they don't drill it into women enough to be wary of other women in life. Female friends have hurt me far more than any man ever did or any breakup. I think it's because I never really had it on my radar to be careful not to trust other women.
Just my 2 cents.
Please elaborate. I'm very intrigued.
Anonymous wrote:OP, wish you’d have posted with a username!
+1 If you did, then you might meet someone who could give you a reason to stop sleeping with your ex-DH
Anonymous wrote:I've had plenty of opportunities, never did it and I have no regrets. You, OP, are a loser!
with all due respect, your opinion as to whether or not i am a loser or a winner is irrelevant given how little you know about me. I'm sure your SO is overwhelmed by your compassion and understanding. Nonetheless, thank you for answering my question.
Anonymous wrote:Anonymous wrote:It seems many people who have affairs feel regret and self loathing afterwards, but cant see that or realize it when they are in the fog.
Many, perhaps, but not most IMO. If done right, and no one get's caught, it's just another chapter in life.
I wonder what the exact percentages are...
OP - I'm sorry your needs aren't being met even though you've clearly stated them to your (soon-to-be-ex)DH. Best of luck in the future
to all of the non-judgmental responses - thank you.
and to those who did judge - when your marriage goes through tough times i hope you make better choices than i did
and to those who did judge - when your marriage goes through tough times i hope you make better choices than i did
Anonymous wrote:Does your spouse know about them? Does your spouse also have affairs?
yes
not to my knowledge
Anonymous wrote:How many STD’s have you had?
none
Anonymous wrote:Are you a complete sleaze bag or just partial?
the jury's still out on that one...