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I get on here and sign in, and my username shows up whenever I post.. How come more people aren't signed in? How come everyone is anonymous on here?
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I hate to oversimplify but this is America and I don't want someone I've never met to have the right to tell me what I can and cannot do with my own body. There are plenty of wonderful countries some of the PPs can relocate to if they wish to have such decisions made by others.


No problem. We'll keep it simple. You have a choice...whether or not to have sex. Don't have sex until you are ready to handle the responsibility that comes with it, i.e, the possibility that you could produce a new life.


Unfortunately, no one seems to follow through on that when it comes to their own daughters. I have seen too many pro-life Catholics who, when faced with a pregnant fifteen year old, take them to the clinic because they don't want her to screw up her life. She of course promised to not have sex until marriage, but that just translated into sex without contraception. And the irony is that the parents end up doing penance by devoting themselves even more to the pro-life cause. It's crazy.

So when I see a poster who says what you said, I say to myself that you probably had sex long before you were ready to be a mother. You just got lucky, and now that you are safely past those years, you are telling people to do what you did not.

If you want to write back and say you first had sex at 25 with your future husband, by all means do so. But I bet it's not true.


I am not the OP, and I wasn't 25, but I was 18, and it was with the man I knew that I was going to marry.. We used birth control but had also talked numerous times about what we would do and how we would change our lives should it have happened that way. I'm just saying that there ARE people with similar circumstances to what you mentioned. That being said, I have always been pro life, and we were indeed already married for a couple of years before we actually had our child, but I can confidently say that had it ever come up, I would never have aborted a pregnancy. Adoption is a beautiful solution to an unexpected pregnancy. Why does everyone seem to have forgotten about that?? Yes, you have to put up with pregnancy for 9 months, however, is that really that large a price to pay in order to be a HUGE blessing for another couple who may not be able to to create this gift for themselves.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
I really can't understand why people say it's "so obvious" that a fetus is meaningfully different from a 1 year old, since, as someone said, life is a continuum. If it's life, it's life, We give different categories of human life different legal rights and responsibilities, as someone said, but there is only only category that we say has no rights whatever due to no act of its own.

Thanks again for sharing your views.


OP, a lot of people who are pro-choice nevertheless do see a difference between the morality of aborting an embry, or a fetus before 13 weeks gestation, verses a second or epseiclly third trimester abortion.

Some of us who have had a miscarriage of a fetus at 6 or 8 or 10 weeks gestation really have a gut sense that this "cluster of cells" just isn't a "person" and yet we would very much agree that a fetus at 39 weeks gestation (or 28 weeks -- capable of possibly living on its own once born) is a "person". But there's a huge difference between the cluster of cells at 5 weeks or 8 weeks gestation, and a fully developed fetus at 37 or 38 weeks.

It's obvious to me that an embryo is different from a 1 year old, in terms of rights which we should give it, which is in my opinion, to sya, no rights. But a 38 week old fetus should not be aborted... and I think most laws do not allow it to be (I could be wrong).


I have had a miscarriage.. and I gotta say, I never ever felt that what I was carrying inside of me was any different than a person. In fact, when they told me at my ultrasound that there was no heartbeat, it devestated me that I had a nonliving human being inside of me. To me, and to a lot of other people, there was no difference, we fell in love with the HUMAN we were carrying inside of us from the moment the second line showed up on the pregnancy test.
This is really superficial. These are material objects that don't mean anything. How long have you been married? Your sister ASKED YOUR PERMISSION before she went out and got this particular ring, you told her it was okay... and now you're wanting to recant that because she went out and bought it since she thought she had your blessing?!?!?!?! How do you think it makes your husband feel to see you so bent out of shape about this?? To see that after being married, starting your lives together and building a family, that your priorities still haven't changed from the time when you were picking out engagement rings?? I know if something like that were to come up in my marriage it would upset me greatly. You REALLY need to just get over this all on our own before you hurt feelings over something so meaningless.
Haven't heard from OP in a while... wanna know the whole story.. At this point I'm ready to assume you're just crazy.
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:OP - consider checking out Project Rachel offered through the Catholic church.
You DON'T have to be affiliated with the Church or even Christian to attend.

Is your DH your best friend? He should be, you married him for better or for worse. You should be able to share everything with him
That means the good, the bad, and the ugly.

Eh, I question the motives of this poster.

I don't see what this information adds or doesn't add to your relationship. Why is it necessary to "share" this information? Does it affect him? Is it relevant? Would it change the way he feels about you?

You had a life before him. It is irrelevant. See a counselor and deal with your grief on your own.

If he asks, tell him. If he doesn't, then deal with your issues on your own
.


I disagree with this... we don't get married to deal with things on our own.. we get married and have a partner to deal with things with us. If this is something bothering the OP, I think she should have a discussion with him about it, and if not, the guilt of hiding it from him will only add another issue for her to deal with on her own.. it's a downwards piral
no, not just one... I agree and I think that you will find my IP address different (plus I'm one of the VERY few actual screen names I've seen on here!)
I agree with the above post.. find a way to take a break from the day to day. My husband has a high stress job with lots of hours, and we did this for our anniversary and EVERYTHING in our relationship was just refreshed.. we started communicating better, holding hands more, etc etc etc.. It's amazing what a date night or a night in a hotel if you can do it will do for you..
Do you both work? Do you both earn the money? I am not saying that over a grand in parking tickets is in any way but I can also see where he would get annoyed about you spending extra money on things when you guys have this debt.. When you married him.. you married the debt that he had.. His bills became yours to share, just like the money you guys had.. Why do you have an extra account for extras and fun when you have all of these extra bills to pay? It really sounds like you guys need to come to some sort of financial agreement that works for both of you. .
You're looking for some sort of immature revenge because your husband wanted to go see a movie ?!?!?! Seriously?! Let the guy go have some fun... You sound like someone I would want a break from too..

Seriously though.. I hope there was more to it than that because as of right now you sound kind of bitchy, clingy, overbearing, manipulative, and vindictive.
I think that you should tell him. I think it'll make you feel better, and you will know that you and your husband have no secrets. He may be upset that it took you so long to tell him, but that's something he'll get over, and hopefully be supportive of you. I think you'll feel better to clear the air.
I don't think there's any harm in supervising her on some of the kids websites, letting her use "paint" or "word" if she shows interest in doing it, but other than that I really wouldn't worry about it.
There are a few people on here acting like her wanting the back of the garage that's uglying her otherwise nice backyard is unreasonable... It is not. If you have a HOA, I would address it with them first... if not, I would do as the others said and just reasonably talk to them and offer to take the costs of having it done.
I agree using the n word was probably wrong.. but other than that I really don't see a whole lot of fault to what she said.. The caller asked about the n word before she started saying it so it was in context with the conversation.. I agree completely with the PP's "reverse racism" comments.. I can easily and comfortably sit here and say that she's only getting so much trouble from this because she is a white woman.
racism certainly isn't dead, however... as I stated before, I think some people look for it. I'm not saying that PP is necessarily doing that, but I definitely think that's a huge part of the problem... Something that's not meant as racist is taken out of proportion because someone decided to look at it that way. I can see where Dr. Laura's comments were inappropriate, I can see where someone might be offended, but I can also see the point she was trying to make. It is hard for some of us to understand why it's ok for some people to say things that others aren't allowed to etc etc..
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