OP I just want to say I sympathize. I have an irrational phobia too (not of bugs -- of something else), and it's very difficult for people to understand what that feels like if they've never experienced it before.

Have you tried the GDS playground? It's pretty new and very close to you so probably worth checking out.

Hang in there!

Sounds like he's probably fighting something off.

Both my kids started refusing a bottle at some point and I just never pushed the issue because I WFH.

I weaned them both around 14 months with no issues.

I'm so sorry OP.

I gave in and screamed the other day. At an inanimate object. It actually felt pretty good to get it all out. Do you have any outlets for all the stress?

Hang in there. Better days ahead.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:All the young adults will be trying to impress their SO’s by fawning over your kids and playing house.

Exactly. Pawn that toddler right off on one of those skinny minnie's.

Next, hand someone the baby pretty much anytime you need to.

In a lot of ways this is a TERRIFIC kid-adult ratio. As long as the 20 somethings are responsible, pass your kids off! They may not have a reasonable idea of what's appropriate for kids this little though, so I'd just keep and eye on that.

In a few years, this will be awesome too, and your kids will be done being needy by the time all these youngins have kids.

Exactly. The skinnie minnies will use your kids as props to show how they will make great moms. The guys will completely buy into the image of perky boobs, slender waists women holding chubby cute infants as what their future holds.

The only thing you have to do is fake the whole motherhood thing. Talk in lovely soft sing song voice to your kids. Become the "together" "Basking in motherhood" kind of mom with a secret smile of self-satisfaction for bearing kids. Be very kind, welcoming to the skinny minnies and be extra gentle when you hand your kids to them. Scoop in when you want to nurse the baby and don't wait to change smelly diapers. Make sure that your kids are looking cute. Be the hallmark mom with flowy summer clothes and happy kids. Soften your eyes and tone when talking to others ...and you will become #WombGoals

Then, absolutely use them to look after your kids.

DP. It would not even have occurred to me to do that in my 20s. I had no interest in kids and zero experience holding them. My first baby, at 33, was maybe the third baby I had ever held, and certainly the first diaper I ever changed. I would have been kind to a boyfriend's niece/nephew but not involved. I would be the one sipping mimosas and sleeping late. As one should in one's 20s!

Same here. I used to blanche when people would ask if I wanted to hold their babies. Um... no?

OP - I actually cut a beach trip short when I tried to do this with kids this age. My toddler learned how to operate a door that lead to the beach, and managed to escape while I was getting my 4 month old up from a nap, and the adults that were supposed to be watching the toddler didn't fully understand that was a hands-on job. It was just too much and I wasn't enjoying myself at all.

Hopefully you'll get some help when you're there, and can get some rest.

It depends on the park OP. RCP for example has tons of rules that they send you if you rent a picnic site. And DC parks are governed by a different entity and have a different set of rules.

Personally, I cannot imagine someone bothering you for doing this, but I'm sure I would be proven wrong.

2 year olds are so underrated. I felt like this about my DS when he was 2. I posted something around that time about wanting to eat him up!

I believe they do understand. But they lack the ability to control their impulses.

This is where discipline comes in, but in the sense of discipline as "teaching", versus discipline as punishment.

Example: You need to teach your child that she cannot throw sand at the park. The first time she does it, you hold her hand and gently say: "You cannot throw sand at the park".

Your 2 year old understands this completely. And now it's her job to see if you mean it.

So she throws more sand. And you calmly say: "Uh oh, it's not okay to throw sand at the park. We need to leave now."

And then you leave. Your DD may cry, pout, tantrum, promise to do better with another try etc, and you shouldn't listen to any of it. You should take her home.

You teach her there are rules. You teach her they apply to her. You teach her that you mean what you say. And you do it in the spirit of being gentle and helping her learn, not in the spirit of anger and punishment.

Maybe you could try one of those online providers. Maybe you would be more open if you didn't feel like you had to perform in a room with someone?

I don't have personal experience with any of the services, but I hear betterhelp.com advertised.

Also I'm not sure if you have a primary care physician, or an OB that you trust, but you can always ask them too.

Hang in there.

Are they both actually tired at the same time? If not, that may be an issue. We only moved my youngest into the same room as his brother after he dropped his nap so they were both legitimately tired at bed time. If we'd tried before that it would have been a disaster because he would have been keeping his older brother up.

The other thing I'd recommend is proactive check-ins at bedtime.

DH puts them to bed and says: I'm going to come back in in 5 minutes to check on you. And he does that a few times. This worked really well with my kids who just liked the safety net of knowing someone was coming back for them.

I always offer comfort when my children are upset. I think that's a very different thing than giving into whining, which I try not to do.

It's possible you have a sensitive child who may suffer from some anxiety. Ignoring or punishing children with anxiety who are upset generally makes it worse, not better.

12 to 18 months was the hardest time for me with both my kids, based on what the previous PP so eloquently stated re: inability to communicate their increasing wants & desires.

I think also that I was ready for the "terrible twos" and having a "threenager" and the "freaking fours" but never once had I heard how challenging 1 year olds could be. So I think my expectations were that things would be smooth sailing until 2 and I was sincerely disappointed that wasn't the case.

Thankfully someone introduced me to Janet Lansbury during this stage. Otherwise I think I would have lost my sanity.

Anonymous wrote:To me, it's not able age, but stage. That stage when their speech hasn't caught up with their brains and they're super frustrated because we can't understand them and they can't adequately express themselves is the worst.

Yes x 1000.

Anonymous wrote:DD does an amazing job identifying major artists by their work. It’s freaky. We inherited a stack of art books from my grandmother, who was an artist, and DD loves them. You can point to any painting in the books and DD can tell you who painted it.

That's really cool. I wonder if she'll maintain an interest in art over time.

3 can be a tough age.

I think the key to potty training is giving your child autonomy and being their cheerleader as opposed to their adversary.

Can you try to set it up as her choice instead of trying to force her? My 3 year old always wants to be "big" and is very motivated by anything that "big kids" do. So if I framed potty training as something that is an exciting challenge that would make him a big kid, he'd want to prove himself. And we would cheer on his progress.

But if I tell my 3 year old something to do something, he basically just says no reflexively because that's how 3 year olds can be!