I wish parents could be more supportive and less desperate
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
It’s not 2005 |
Anonymous
Yes that’s why elite colleges are filled with low-income Black students. |
Anonymous
If you didn't know, we have a supreme court case for that. |
Anonymous
no need to get mad. send our kid to JMU and be happy. |
Anonymous
Oh yeah. All of those sharp elbowed kids from Anacostia. (I mean the ones who manage to avoid getting shot by the time they reach 18.) Hogging all of the slots at Princeton and such. After you spent ALL of that money on consultants, test prep, and expensive club sports. 
I literally overhead a kid on the DC Streetcar yesterday. He was Facetiming a family friend with pride to let them know that he had gotten accepted into Prince George's community college. According to College Factual, that school's six year graduation rate is 9%. You people need to get out of your bubble from time to time. You really do. |
Anonymous
Thousands of kids are there & happy. |
Anonymous
Maybe. But most "Stem kids" are pushed into it. We have older kids and younger kids, so I have seen it first hand - parents push - oeriod. If you think that does not happen, you are living under a rock. Some parents (more than you know) go so far as to pick their child's major. Ridiculous as it sounds! |
Anonymous
I have said more than once that I'd be fine if my kid didn't go to college as long as they had a practical plan for self-sufficiency and people absolutely freak you when you say this (in the DMV, I get a very different response if I say this in other places). I know people who chose not to go to college or who dropped out of college for a variety of reasons and have fantastic lives. I actually associate that choice with people who are very self-directed and know what they want, because I have a good friend who left college after a year because it felt like some kind of placeholder for "finding herself" and she was like "what if I get a job and live somewhere cheap with a roommate for a while, and find myself while making money instead of spending it." And that's what she did and now 20 years later she has an amazing career in marketing that involves world travel, has owned multiple homes, and is very happy and fulfilled. She found college kind of pointless and I can see why. The same logic that concluded that if you don't go to college, you will wind up a failure with nothing, also concludes that if you don't go to the "best" college (as defined by how many other people think it's the best and not by any metric specific to you) then you won't be as successful as someone who does. I have lots of friends who went to top schools who are vaguely miserable in their lives. It just doesn't seem like the ticket to success and fulfillment everyone seems to think. If you have to borrow a lot of money to attend, it can actually hold you back from doing things that would actually make you happy and successful. |
Anonymous
Noblesse Oblige. To whom much is given, much is expected. |
Anonymous
| There's a balance to everything. I grew up with very laid back parents in a very loving home. Went to top 100 big state school and doing fine. But, I wish my parents were a bit more tiger parents. I wish they had pushed me more, intervened more to tell me what to do, been more disciplined, filled my schedule with more tutoring, lessons, camps etc. If they had, I know I would have done better in school and went to a better college, and honestly, probably been more successful. Of course, I could have been self-motivated to do all this on my own but when you're young, not everyone is so mature to see all this. |
Anonymous
Best decision my kid ever made was picking JMU…using it as a put down is ridiculous!! |
Anonymous
If the community has a problem, they need to fix the community. They need to fix the source of the problem rather than giving them free points. |
Anonymous
I am well aware that there are parents that push!!! However, we are not those parents and there are many who do not push. We let our kids guide what interests them. Were we happy they gravitated towards STEM---yes, but mainly because we are both STEM grads (and one of us also has a music performance degree toss in with it) so it's what we fully understand. But we never pushed. When our kid asks we guide and answer questions truthfully. As in, my kid loved chemistry in HS and is strong in math. So we researched what getting a Chem degree means and what jobs are like. Then kid said "I'm not a fan of chem labs---like the math and the topic part of chem but hate the lab work". So they decided that perhaps a straight chem degree isn't for them, since with only a BS, you will likely be a grunt in someone else's lab doing lab work most of the day. So then they investigated engineering and went from there. It's a logical choice when you love math and science. Now they are at college they have even decided to add in a CS minor because they loved their initial coding class at college level and they see how it will benefit them to their areas of interest and research area with their specific engineering major. I would never think of "picking" my kid's major---that is ridiculous but I know does happen. So for those that STEM is their strong suit, it's the obvious choice to select a path in that. My kids would have been miserable if we had said "you need to be an Eng Lit major" or "communications major" or "marketing major" or whatever humanities you want to pick. Because it's not their strong suit. And I'd never force them to pick a major they dont' like. This is their journey through life, I'm just along for the ride...and for paying 
The only thing I do explain to my kids is to also look at your career choices with each major. Know what your options might be and what the initial, 5 year and 10 year pay looks like for someone with a BS/BA in that degree. See the types of jobs one might have at the 1 year, 5 year and 10 year mark with that degree. Know whether a MS or PHD or some advanced degree is required to actually do the work you are interested in (ie. Psychology really requires advanced degree to truly do any counseling or interesting research beyond being a grunt in someone else's lab, so if you are not in for additional schooling think about what you plan to do with your degree). basically, be aware of what your career path might be like. So if you don't want to work in a lab all day, then a straight Chem or Bio degree might not be your thing---but if you pair it with a business degree/communications degree/data science/CS/whatever then you have other options. |
Anonymous
Exactly, rich people get free points (for example, 40% of Harvard admits = ALDC) Additionally, Low imcome people get free points. URMs get free points. It's alwasys the hardworing middle class getting fukced. System is broken. This is bad for the society and the country. |
Anonymous
|
Nastiness and competitiveness is a by-product of living in one of the most stressful, aggressive cities in the USA. My DH look forward to putting our senior in a less stressful and obnoxious area. We are leaving too
Nightmare here |