Can someone explain the mindset of a cheater?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I am of course raising my kids with basic knowledge of how relationships work, and the importance of understanding the core needs of your partner, and the probable consequences if you stop meeting their core needs. My kids are reasonably smart, not geniuses, but they would pretty much agree with everything I've posted on DCUM.

There is NO WAY your kids would ever agree that it's ok for you to cheat on their mom. No way. This is just another one of the lies you tell yourself.

My kids understand the basic concept that willfully ignoring your partner's core/legitimate relationships needs does do not (magically) make those needs go away, but instead these are filled through some other means. Au contaire: it is YOU who are telling yourself lies. If I pretend you do not exist, does that make it so?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I am of course raising my kids with basic knowledge of how relationships work, and the importance of understanding the core needs of your partner, and the probable consequences if you stop meeting their core needs. My kids are reasonably smart, not geniuses, but they would pretty much agree with everything I've posted on DCUM.

There is NO WAY your kids would ever agree that it's ok for you to cheat on their mom. No way. This is just another one of the lies you tell yourself.

My kids understand the basic concept that willfully ignoring your partner's core/legitimate relationships needs does do not (magically) make those needs go away, but instead these are filled through some other means. Au contaire: it is YOU who are telling yourself lies. If I pretend you do not exist, does that make it so?

O think your kids would be asking why didn’t you divorce her instead of cheating? They also see it as cheating on them as you took time/mental energy away from their family life..

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I am of course raising my kids with basic knowledge of how relationships work, and the importance of understanding the core needs of your partner, and the probable consequences if you stop meeting their core needs. My kids are reasonably smart, not geniuses, but they would pretty much agree with everything I've posted on DCUM.

There is NO WAY your kids would ever agree that it's ok for you to cheat on their mom. No way. This is just another one of the lies you tell yourself.

My kids understand the basic concept that willfully ignoring your partner's core/legitimate relationships needs does do not (magically) make those needs go away, but instead these are filled through some other means. Au contaire: it is YOU who are telling yourself lies. If I pretend you do not exist, does that make it so?

I am raising my children with an idea about how relationships work and those ideas about relationships include transparency, honesty, equality and consent. I am not raising my daughter to be someone else's sex slave. I am not raising my son to expect sex from his wife at his demand. Sex, even in marriage, has to be consensual. Lack of sex, by contrast, is not always consensual. I can choose not to sleep with you even if you don't agree to that.

Yes, it might be that if my kids no longer want to have sex with their spouse, that the relationship might be at an end. I am raising them to be honest and transparent and skilled enough to verbally negotiate the parameters of a new relationship -- whether it be a marriage in which the partners agree to no longer be monogamous or agree to divorce, etc.

My goal is not to raise my kids to preserve a marriage above all else. That leads to abuse.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, divorce is your friend. Why do you go on a rant on sexlessness when you don’t have to suffer if you get a divorce? This is what makes you selfish and a narc. Just go find someone younger and new who will love having sex with you. Give your wife respect and a chance for a future that she doesn’t have with you. You’ve got one foot out the door whether you realize it or not. Do your wife a favor and divorce her even if it is not the right time for you.

Divorce helps nobody because nobody is suffering. The sexless wife is happy (stays married + no sex) and the normal libido man is also happy getting sex elsewhere. Why divorce a sexless wife over something so unimportant and trivial as sex? That’s the absolute last thing on her list, something she doesn’t even want, it can’t be any big deal that he does that unimportant thing with another woman. That’s actually a nicer favor to her than divorce: if she wanted that she’d just get one herself.

Not true. It changes the cheater. Over time they are different, judgmental, more likely to explode with anger, stressed, etc. Leading a double life is not easy.

The wife isn’t happy. There is no intimacy in the marriage. That dried up a lot of times because of the way the cheater was in the marriage.

You have no idea what will happen in your AP’s spouse finds out- or your own spouse. They will. Over time, even the best liars get caught.

Do you want exposure? Do you want AP’s husband at your front door?

You are in deep denial.

My friend just typed up a 3-page letter to be sent to the AP's spouse detailing the affair in detail and that this spouse had multiple affairs.

It is being sent 'signature required'.

I agree. You just don't know what will happen or if you are found out. You aren't in control of the person you are cheating with and if they slip up---there goes your life.

It's a risk you take for playing the game.

People never factor in the AP's spouse whom they have never met and only know as described by their AP. They are often VERY different than they are described to the AP.

So, yeah, watch the f*ck out. I'd never get involved in somebody else's marriage. You never know what they might do to you or your family.

I know one lady who had a couple of friends get a hold of her and shave half her hair off. They made sure to tell her "married men are off limits". She didn't know them and couldn't prove it came from the DW. DW never confronted DH or DW about it. Acted like the sweet dumb spouse. Crazy but yes you never know what will happen when you try to hurt someone's family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I am of course raising my kids with basic knowledge of how relationships work, and the importance of understanding the core needs of your partner, and the probable consequences if you stop meeting their core needs. My kids are reasonably smart, not geniuses, but they would pretty much agree with everything I've posted on DCUM.

There is NO WAY your kids would ever agree that it's ok for you to cheat on their mom. No way. This is just another one of the lies you tell yourself.

My kids understand the basic concept that willfully ignoring your partner's core/legitimate relationships needs does do not (magically) make those needs go away, but instead these are filled through some other means. Au contaire: it is YOU who are telling yourself lies. If I pretend you do not exist, does that make it so?

You're lying about your whereabouts and what you are doing to your entire family.

Tell your wife you are going to see other women to meet your sexual needs. When you go to your AP's house tell your family. Since you feel it's right stop HIDING your double lifestyle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, divorce is your friend. Why do you go on a rant on sexlessness when you don’t have to suffer if you get a divorce? This is what makes you selfish and a narc. Just go find someone younger and new who will love having sex with you. Give your wife respect and a chance for a future that she doesn’t have with you. You’ve got one foot out the door whether you realize it or not. Do your wife a favor and divorce her even if it is not the right time for you.

Divorce helps nobody because nobody is suffering. The sexless wife is happy (stays married + no sex) and the normal libido man is also happy getting sex elsewhere. Why divorce a sexless wife over something so unimportant and trivial as sex? That’s the absolute last thing on her list, something she doesn’t even want, it can’t be any big deal that he does that unimportant thing with another woman. That’s actually a nicer favor to her than divorce: if she wanted that she’d just get one herself.

Not true. It changes the cheater. Over time they are different, judgmental, more likely to explode with anger, stressed, etc. Leading a double life is not easy.

The wife isn’t happy. There is no intimacy in the marriage. That dried up a lot of times because of the way the cheater was in the marriage.

You have no idea what will happen in your AP’s spouse finds out- or your own spouse. They will. Over time, even the best liars get caught.

Do you want exposure? Do you want AP’s husband at your front door?

You are in deep denial.

My friend just typed up a 3-page letter to be sent to the AP's spouse detailing the affair in detail and that this spouse had multiple affairs.

It is being sent 'signature required'.

I agree. You just don't know what will happen or if you are found out. You aren't in control of the person you are cheating with and if they slip up---there goes your life.

It's a risk you take for playing the game.

People never factor in the AP's spouse whom they have never met and only know as described by their AP. They are often VERY different than they are described to the AP.

So, yeah, watch the f*ck out. I'd never get involved in somebody else's marriage. You never know what they might do to you or your family.

I know one lady who had a couple of friends get a hold of her and shave half her hair off. They made sure to tell her "married men are off limits". She didn't know them and couldn't prove it came from the DW. DW never confronted DH or DW about it. Acted like the sweet dumb spouse. Crazy but yes you never know what will happen when you try to hurt someone's family.

I LOVE this! I have a couple friends that have offered similar things to do to the OW. I can’t say I’ve put any of it off the table yet

And-yes we hold my spouse to the same standard. Married people with kids that cheat are scumbags.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, divorce is your friend. Why do you go on a rant on sexlessness when you don’t have to suffer if you get a divorce? This is what makes you selfish and a narc. Just go find someone younger and new who will love having sex with you. Give your wife respect and a chance for a future that she doesn’t have with you. You’ve got one foot out the door whether you realize it or not. Do your wife a favor and divorce her even if it is not the right time for you.

Divorce helps nobody because nobody is suffering. The sexless wife is happy (stays married + no sex) and the normal libido man is also happy getting sex elsewhere. Why divorce a sexless wife over something so unimportant and trivial as sex? That’s the absolute last thing on her list, something she doesn’t even want, it can’t be any big deal that he does that unimportant thing with another woman. That’s actually a nicer favor to her than divorce: if she wanted that she’d just get one herself.

Not true. It changes the cheater. Over time they are different, judgmental, more likely to explode with anger, stressed, etc. Leading a double life is not easy.

The wife isn’t happy. There is no intimacy in the marriage. That dried up a lot of times because of the way the cheater was in the marriage.

You have no idea what will happen in your AP’s spouse finds out- or your own spouse. They will. Over time, even the best liars get caught.

Do you want exposure? Do you want AP’s husband at your front door?

You are in deep denial.

My friend just typed up a 3-page letter to be sent to the AP's spouse detailing the affair in detail and that this spouse had multiple affairs.

It is being sent 'signature required'.

I agree. You just don't know what will happen or if you are found out. You aren't in control of the person you are cheating with and if they slip up---there goes your life.

It's a risk you take for playing the game.

People never factor in the AP's spouse whom they have never met and only know as described by their AP. They are often VERY different than they are described to the AP.

So, yeah, watch the f*ck out. I'd never get involved in somebody else's marriage. You never know what they might do to you or your family.

I know one lady who had a couple of friends get a hold of her and shave half her hair off. They made sure to tell her "married men are off limits". She didn't know them and couldn't prove it came from the DW. DW never confronted DH or DW about it. Acted like the sweet dumb spouse. Crazy but yes you never know what will happen when you try to hurt someone's family.

Omg! So true. My family and friends are fiercely protective. You f@ck with one of us, you better move out of the country.

I have not told them yet for this reason. Only my one crazy friend in NC who is ready to drive up here this week and take care of her

[Anonymous]

And her and her whore cheater friends loved to discuss their affairs. Wtf?! What kind of women are these?!!

I have childhood friends, HS friends, work friends, a tight knit group of 4 college friends - we all know each other’s husbands. Nobody trash talks them and nobody has talked about having an affair or f@cking guys behind their backs.

But, my friends are all pretty, accomplished, athletes with careers- I didn’t hang around the whore crowd in HS/college.

Classy women these women bragging about their affair partners to friends, comparing dick notes and conquests.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, divorce is your friend. Why do you go on a rant on sexlessness when you don’t have to suffer if you get a divorce? This is what makes you selfish and a narc. Just go find someone younger and new who will love having sex with you. Give your wife respect and a chance for a future that she doesn’t have with you. You’ve got one foot out the door whether you realize it or not. Do your wife a favor and divorce her even if it is not the right time for you.

Divorce helps nobody because nobody is suffering. The sexless wife is happy (stays married + no sex) and the normal libido man is also happy getting sex elsewhere. Why divorce a sexless wife over something so unimportant and trivial as sex? That’s the absolute last thing on her list, something she doesn’t even want, it can’t be any big deal that he does that unimportant thing with another woman. That’s actually a nicer favor to her than divorce: if she wanted that she’d just get one herself.

Not true. It changes the cheater. Over time they are different, judgmental, more likely to explode with anger, stressed, etc. Leading a double life is not easy.

The wife isn’t happy. There is no intimacy in the marriage. That dried up a lot of times because of the way the cheater was in the marriage.

You have no idea what will happen in your AP’s spouse finds out- or your own spouse. They will. Over time, even the best liars get caught.

Do you want exposure? Do you want AP’s husband at your front door?

You are in deep denial.

My friend just typed up a 3-page letter to be sent to the AP's spouse detailing the affair in detail and that this spouse had multiple affairs.

It is being sent 'signature required'.

I agree. You just don't know what will happen or if you are found out. You aren't in control of the person you are cheating with and if they slip up---there goes your life.

It's a risk you take for playing the game.

People never factor in the AP's spouse whom they have never met and only know as described by their AP. They are often VERY different than they are described to the AP.

So, yeah, watch the f*ck out. I'd never get involved in somebody else's marriage. You never know what they might do to you or your family.

I know one lady who had a couple of friends get a hold of her and shave half her hair off. They made sure to tell her "married men are off limits". She didn't know them and couldn't prove it came from the DW. DW never confronted DH or DW about it. Acted like the sweet dumb spouse. Crazy but yes you never know what will happen when you try to hurt someone's family.

I LOVE this! I have a couple friends that have offered similar things to do to the OW. I can’t say I’ve put any of it off the table yet

And-yes we hold my spouse to the same standard. Married people with kids that cheat are scumbags.

They are scumbags, but I wouldn't go to those lengths. I'm thinking that could be against the law, lol.

I would send her employer anon info. along with her friends and family. After that I wouldn't waste anymore oxygen on AP or the other dirt bag.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, divorce is your friend. Why do you go on a rant on sexlessness when you don’t have to suffer if you get a divorce? This is what makes you selfish and a narc. Just go find someone younger and new who will love having sex with you. Give your wife respect and a chance for a future that she doesn’t have with you. You’ve got one foot out the door whether you realize it or not. Do your wife a favor and divorce her even if it is not the right time for you.

Divorce helps nobody because nobody is suffering. The sexless wife is happy (stays married + no sex) and the normal libido man is also happy getting sex elsewhere. Why divorce a sexless wife over something so unimportant and trivial as sex? That’s the absolute last thing on her list, something she doesn’t even want, it can’t be any big deal that he does that unimportant thing with another woman. That’s actually a nicer favor to her than divorce: if she wanted that she’d just get one herself.

Not true. It changes the cheater. Over time they are different, judgmental, more likely to explode with anger, stressed, etc. Leading a double life is not easy.

The wife isn’t happy. There is no intimacy in the marriage. That dried up a lot of times because of the way the cheater was in the marriage.

You have no idea what will happen in your AP’s spouse finds out- or your own spouse. They will. Over time, even the best liars get caught.

Do you want exposure? Do you want AP’s husband at your front door?

You are in deep denial.

My friend just typed up a 3-page letter to be sent to the AP's spouse detailing the affair in detail and that this spouse had multiple affairs.

It is being sent 'signature required'.

I agree. You just don't know what will happen or if you are found out. You aren't in control of the person you are cheating with and if they slip up---there goes your life.

It's a risk you take for playing the game.

People never factor in the AP's spouse whom they have never met and only know as described by their AP. They are often VERY different than they are described to the AP.

So, yeah, watch the f*ck out. I'd never get involved in somebody else's marriage. You never know what they might do to you or your family.

I know one lady who had a couple of friends get a hold of her and shave half her hair off. They made sure to tell her "married men are off limits". She didn't know them and couldn't prove it came from the DW. DW never confronted DH or DW about it. Acted like the sweet dumb spouse. Crazy but yes you never know what will happen when you try to hurt someone's family.

I LOVE this! I have a couple friends that have offered similar things to do to the OW. I can’t say I’ve put any of it off the table yet

And-yes we hold my spouse to the same standard. Married people with kids that cheat are scumbags.

They are scumbags, but I wouldn't go to those lengths. I'm thinking that could be against the law, lol.

I would send her employer anon info. along with her friends and family. After that I wouldn't waste anymore oxygen on AP or the other dirt bag.

This.

I would just send the certified signature required letters to spouse.

The fantasies are fun to entertain. I can’t say if our paths ever happen to cross in this town I don’t spectacularly embarrass and humiliate her in public though.

Letters are legal. They are telling the truth and they can’t sue you or report to police. Anon letters particularly. It’s best to stay in the confines of the law as much as you’d like to pummel the b@tch to the ground Jerry Springer style .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:And her and her whore cheater friends loved to discuss their affairs. Wtf?! What kind of women are these?!!

I have childhood friends, HS friends, work friends, a tight knit group of 4 college friends - we all know each other’s husbands. Nobody trash talks them and nobody has talked about having an affair or f@cking guys behind their backs.

But, my friends are all pretty, accomplished, athletes with careers- I didn’t hang around the whore crowd in HS/college.

Classy women these women bragging about their affair partners to friends, comparing dick notes and conquests.

I would not call any woman looking for d*ck on the Internet and screwing them in her husband's bed classy. Lol

They like to portray themselves as worldly, enlightened and 'French'...ummm you are on a loser website picking up other loser's just for sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, divorce is your friend. Why do you go on a rant on sexlessness when you don’t have to suffer if you get a divorce? This is what makes you selfish and a narc. Just go find someone younger and new who will love having sex with you. Give your wife respect and a chance for a future that she doesn’t have with you. You’ve got one foot out the door whether you realize it or not. Do your wife a favor and divorce her even if it is not the right time for you.

Divorce helps nobody because nobody is suffering. The sexless wife is happy (stays married + no sex) and the normal libido man is also happy getting sex elsewhere. Why divorce a sexless wife over something so unimportant and trivial as sex? That’s the absolute last thing on her list, something she doesn’t even want, it can’t be any big deal that he does that unimportant thing with another woman. That’s actually a nicer favor to her than divorce: if she wanted that she’d just get one herself.

Good point. My DW hates golf. She used to like it, not any more. That's fine, I'll just go play golf without her. She doesn't miss playing golf. I'm not going to get divorced over this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, divorce is your friend. Why do you go on a rant on sexlessness when you don’t have to suffer if you get a divorce? This is what makes you selfish and a narc. Just go find someone younger and new who will love having sex with you. Give your wife respect and a chance for a future that she doesn’t have with you. You’ve got one foot out the door whether you realize it or not. Do your wife a favor and divorce her even if it is not the right time for you.

Divorce helps nobody because nobody is suffering. The sexless wife is happy (stays married + no sex) and the normal libido man is also happy getting sex elsewhere. Why divorce a sexless wife over something so unimportant and trivial as sex? That’s the absolute last thing on her list, something she doesn’t even want, it can’t be any big deal that he does that unimportant thing with another woman. That’s actually a nicer favor to her than divorce: if she wanted that she’d just get one herself.

Not true. It changes the cheater. Over time they are different, judgmental, more likely to explode with anger, stressed, etc. Leading a double life is not easy.

The wife isn’t happy. There is no intimacy in the marriage. That dried up a lot of times because of the way the cheater was in the marriage.

You have no idea what will happen in your AP’s spouse finds out- or your own spouse. They will. Over time, even the best liars get caught.

Do you want exposure? Do you want AP’s husband at your front door?

You are in deep denial.

My friend just typed up a 3-page letter to be sent to the AP's spouse detailing the affair in detail and that this spouse had multiple affairs.

It is being sent 'signature required'.

I agree. You just don't know what will happen or if you are found out. You aren't in control of the person you are cheating with and if they slip up---there goes your life.

It's a risk you take for playing the game.

People never factor in the AP's spouse whom they have never met and only know as described by their AP. They are often VERY different than they are described to the AP.

So, yeah, watch the f*ck out. I'd never get involved in somebody else's marriage. You never know what they might do to you or your family.

I know one lady who had a couple of friends get a hold of her and shave half her hair off. They made sure to tell her "married men are off limits". She didn't know them and couldn't prove it came from the DW. DW never confronted DH or DW about it. Acted like the sweet dumb spouse. Crazy but yes you never know what will happen when you try to hurt someone's family.

I LOVE this! I have a couple friends that have offered similar things to do to the OW. I can’t say I’ve put any of it off the table yet

And-yes we hold my spouse to the same standard. Married people with kids that cheat are scumbags.

They are scumbags, but I wouldn't go to those lengths. I'm thinking that could be against the law, lol.

I would send her employer anon info. along with her friends and family. After that I wouldn't waste anymore oxygen on AP or the other dirt bag.

This.

I would just send the certified signature required letters to spouse.

The fantasies are fun to entertain. I can’t say if our paths ever happen to cross in this town I don’t spectacularly embarrass and humiliate her in public though.

Letters are legal. They are telling the truth and they can’t sue you or report to police. Anon letters particularly. It’s best to stay in the confines of the law as much as you’d like to pummel the b@tch to the ground Jerry Springer style .

I don't get the certified signature. What's that about and what's the purpose. They would probably just throw it away.

My ex didn't cheat but because nasty until I had enough. Today I'm remarried and paid off the home I got from the divorce.

I ended up well off even though he said I'd end up with a lowly construction worker, lol. He is not dong well..at all. The best Karma is getting even that way.

[Anonymous]

Hey Big guy, when your wife’s friends or family decide to beat the crap out of your AP or shave her hair off like the op described—are you going to come running to AP’s defense ? What if they toilet paper her house and car with “whore” signs? Or are you just using AP for sex and couldn’t care?

Just trying to figure out where your loyalty would be in that situation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Again, divorce is your friend. Why do you go on a rant on sexlessness when you don’t have to suffer if you get a divorce? This is what makes you selfish and a narc. Just go find someone younger and new who will love having sex with you. Give your wife respect and a chance for a future that she doesn’t have with you. You’ve got one foot out the door whether you realize it or not. Do your wife a favor and divorce her even if it is not the right time for you.

Divorce helps nobody because nobody is suffering. The sexless wife is happy (stays married + no sex) and the normal libido man is also happy getting sex elsewhere. Why divorce a sexless wife over something so unimportant and trivial as sex? That’s the absolute last thing on her list, something she doesn’t even want, it can’t be any big deal that he does that unimportant thing with another woman. That’s actually a nicer favor to her than divorce: if she wanted that she’d just get one herself.

Not true. It changes the cheater. Over time they are different, judgmental, more likely to explode with anger, stressed, etc. Leading a double life is not easy.

The wife isn’t happy. There is no intimacy in the marriage. That dried up a lot of times because of the way the cheater was in the marriage.

You have no idea what will happen in your AP’s spouse finds out- or your own spouse. They will. Over time, even the best liars get caught.

Do you want exposure? Do you want AP’s husband at your front door?

You are in deep denial.

My friend just typed up a 3-page letter to be sent to the AP's spouse detailing the affair in detail and that this spouse had multiple affairs.

It is being sent 'signature required'.

I agree. You just don't know what will happen or if you are found out. You aren't in control of the person you are cheating with and if they slip up---there goes your life.

It's a risk you take for playing the game.

People never factor in the AP's spouse whom they have never met and only know as described by their AP. They are often VERY different than they are described to the AP.

So, yeah, watch the f*ck out. I'd never get involved in somebody else's marriage. You never know what they might do to you or your family.

I know one lady who had a couple of friends get a hold of her and shave half her hair off. They made sure to tell her "married men are off limits". She didn't know them and couldn't prove it came from the DW. DW never confronted DH or DW about it. Acted like the sweet dumb spouse. Crazy but yes you never know what will happen when you try to hurt someone's family.

I LOVE this! I have a couple friends that have offered similar things to do to the OW. I can’t say I’ve put any of it off the table yet

And-yes we hold my spouse to the same standard. Married people with kids that cheat are scumbags.

They are scumbags, but I wouldn't go to those lengths. I'm thinking that could be against the law, lol.

I would send her employer anon info. along with her friends and family. After that I wouldn't waste anymore oxygen on AP or the other dirt bag.

This.

I would just send the certified signature required letters to spouse.

The fantasies are fun to entertain. I can’t say if our paths ever happen to cross in this town I don’t spectacularly embarrass and humiliate her in public though.

Letters are legal. They are telling the truth and they can’t sue you or report to police. Anon letters particularly. It’s best to stay in the confines of the law as much as you’d like to pummel the b@tch to the ground Jerry Springer style .

I don't get the certified signature. What's that about and what's the purpose. They would probably just throw it away.

My ex didn't cheat but because nasty until I had enough. Today I'm remarried and paid off the home I got from the divorce.

I ended up well off even though he said I'd end up with a lowly construction worker, lol. He is not dong well..at all. The best Karma is getting even that way.

Congrats!