Pediatrician + Family/Friend Making Comments About My Choice Not To Breastfeed

[Anonymous]

oooo, I love cat fights! Woman against woman! Keep at it girls.

[Anonymous]

I am going to give OP a break since she's mom to a newborn but she definitely could have asked her question in a way that would've avoided a lot of the crazy people on this thread and definitely didn't have to mention in her follow up that the reason she knows her nipples are sensitive is because they are bruised after sexy times.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am going to give OP a break since she's mom to a newborn but she definitely could have asked her question in a way that would've avoided a lot of the crazy people on this thread and definitely didn't have to mention in her follow up that the reason she knows her nipples are sensitive is because they are bruised after sexy times.

She said that they’re also sensitive and chaff from everyday stuff. It happens. I can’t go without a bra or my nipples become irritated and sore. This has happened my whole life.

[Anonymous]

JFC this thread is nuts. I'm pregnant with my second and I am choosing not to breastfeed this time. At all. Or pump.

OP, you're fine. And you're not alone. And I don't entertain any questions from anyone on this, nor do my friends really ask?

[Anonymous]

I breastfed all my kids past age two but the crazy breastfeeding lunatics in this thread are making me sad that they probably see me as on “their side.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am going to give OP a break since she's mom to a newborn but she definitely could have asked her question in a way that would've avoided a lot of the crazy people on this thread and definitely didn't have to mention in her follow up that the reason she knows her nipples are sensitive is because they are bruised after sexy times.

She said that they’re also sensitive and chaff from everyday stuff. It happens. I can’t go without a bra or my nipples become irritated and sore. This has happened my whole life.

I get that, I'm just saying she could've worded things differently and people here wouldn't have jumped on her, but again, she's mom to a newborn and she's frustrated, so let's all give her a break.

OP - get off this website and get some sleep.

[Anonymous]

Because it's a weird choice. Do antivaxxers get a lot of understanding? NO. It's the same thing.

[Anonymous]

Cutting through the noise to the most important point...


... OP would be a lot more credible if she had at least tried, and then concluded that nursing was not for her.


This is because breast milk is truly the undisputed better choice, and it's right there and easy to attempt. If it doesn't work, there's nothing easier than to grab a bottle and formula-feed! My mother tried to breastfeed and it didn't work, so I was formula-fed. I breast-fed my son until I had to take an emergency radioactive exploratory treatment, which meant stopping breastfeeding cold turkey that day in the ER. These things happen, no one is to blame.

But not even trying shows the deep-rooted anxiety that are crippling OP and forcing her to pick a certain path in life. It's a little sad she cannot or will not seek treatment for her fight or flight mindset. I can only hope that she realizes that mindset will lead to more questionable decisions in the future, if she doesn't so something about it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I breastfed all my kids past age two but the crazy breastfeeding lunatics in this thread are making me sad that they probably see me as on “their side.”

Ugh, right? Sorry OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
Cutting through the noise to the most important point...


... OP would be a lot more credible if she had at least tried, and then concluded that nursing was not for her.


This is because breast milk is truly the undisputed better choice, and it's right there and easy to attempt. If it doesn't work, there's nothing easier than to grab a bottle and formula-feed! My mother tried to breastfeed and it didn't work, so I was formula-fed. I breast-fed my son until I had to take an emergency radioactive exploratory treatment, which meant stopping breastfeeding cold turkey that day in the ER. These things happen, no one is to blame.

But not even trying shows the deep-rooted anxiety that are crippling OP and forcing her to pick a certain path in life. It's a little sad she cannot or will not seek treatment for her fight or flight mindset. I can only hope that she realizes that mindset will lead to more questionable decisions in the future, if she doesn't so something about it.

“Credible”? Seriously?

She doesn’t have to try to breastfeed. She really doesn’t. Yes, there are health benefits, but nothing so crucial that a new mom should be bullied and shamed because she doesn’t want to do something that she believes will be very painful for her. There is NO parenting issue that justifies some of the shaming happening here.

OP is perfectly credible to her own experience and doesn’t need to justify her decision to any of you. Y’all will pick apart whatever reason an OP gives and make her out to be a sh*tty mom no matter what she chooses. Breastfeed and potentially you’re excluding your partner from feeding / being a mommy martyr / etc. If you breastfeed for too long, there’s something wrong with you and you’re selfish because it couldn’t possibly be about your kid’s needs. Quit breastfeeding early, and face being told you’re a selfish mom because you can’t give your kid this one thing right out of the gate. Nurse in public and you’re an exhibitionist. Decline to nurse in public and you’re a prude. No one can win this game, especially not here.

OP, it’s possible your experience wouldn’t have been as bad as you fear, but who cares?! It’s your choice.

- breastfed 2 kids a total of 5 years and have only ever asked about breastfeeding when a new mom brings it up, which they usually do if they want to talk about it

[Anonymous]

OP, it's fine for you to not BF. Really. Ignore the haters IRL and on this thread. They do this to absolutely everyone with a baby, regardless of circumstances.

True story: I didn't even give birth to my kid-- my surrogate did. And still-- the BFing Nazis were after me about why I didn't induce lactation (um, because the same lifesaving medication that prevents me from carrying a pregnancy also prevents me from BFing, because that would poison my child?). Then they want to know why you can't switch medications. It never ends. They're just completely crazypants. F those judgmental idiots.

[Anonymous]

We had two DC. One was breastfed. Not easy but thrived. The health benefits are not small. They are large. With our second, she just would not do it. We moved to formula relatively fast. We did get pushback like keep trying from everyone. Tough luck. We did what we thought was best for all of us. Did we miss on health benefits? Maybe. But you have to do what is best for the family. OP hang in there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
Cutting through the noise to the most important point...


... OP would be a lot more credible if she had at least tried, and then concluded that nursing was not for her.


This is because breast milk is truly the undisputed better choice, and it's right there and easy to attempt. If it doesn't work, there's nothing easier than to grab a bottle and formula-feed! My mother tried to breastfeed and it didn't work, so I was formula-fed. I breast-fed my son until I had to take an emergency radioactive exploratory treatment, which meant stopping breastfeeding cold turkey that day in the ER. These things happen, no one is to blame.

But not even trying shows the deep-rooted anxiety that are crippling OP and forcing her to pick a certain path in life. It's a little sad she cannot or will not seek treatment for her fight or flight mindset. I can only hope that she realizes that mindset will lead to more questionable decisions in the future, if she doesn't so something about it.

“Credible”? Seriously?

She doesn’t have to try to breastfeed. She really doesn’t. Yes, there are health benefits, but nothing so crucial that a new mom should be bullied and shamed because she doesn’t want to do something that she believes will be very painful for her. There is NO parenting issue that justifies some of the shaming happening here.

OP is perfectly credible to her own experience and doesn’t need to justify her decision to any of you. Y’all will pick apart whatever reason an OP gives and make her out to be a sh*tty mom no matter what she chooses. Breastfeed and potentially you’re excluding your partner from feeding / being a mommy martyr / etc. If you breastfeed for too long, there’s something wrong with you and you’re selfish because it couldn’t possibly be about your kid’s needs. Quit breastfeeding early, and face being told you’re a selfish mom because you can’t give your kid this one thing right out of the gate. Nurse in public and you’re an exhibitionist. Decline to nurse in public and you’re a prude. No one can win this game, especially not here.

OP, it’s possible your experience wouldn’t have been as bad as you fear, but who cares?! It’s your choice.

- breastfed 2 kids a total of 5 years and have only ever asked about breastfeeding when a new mom brings it up, which they usually do if they want to talk about it

+1

I am an extended breastfeeder and these ladies are totally nuts. It is entirely possible to go about one’s life without demanding this information from new mothers or berating them for formula. I nursed all my kids to almost age three and I have literally never asked some poor mom if they are breastfeeding. Also, I think it is totally fine not to breastfeed.

These women are so weird, how they live their lives entirely through their breasts. It is creepy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because it's a weird choice. Do antivaxxers get a lot of understanding? NO. It's the same thing.

Your logic is ignorant and wrong. There is a big difference between choosing not to breastfeed and being anti-vaccine.

[Anonymous]

I still find it funny that OP engages in nipple play frequently with her DH (she said it’s a big part of their intimacy) and wouldn’t even try BFing because of what it would do to her nipples! I guess we all have our priorities!