Why do women date or marry guys with cheating pasts?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men cheat for sex. Keep your man happy in the bedroom especially when they hit 40-50 and they won’t have the energy to cheat.

STOP! Just stop! I had sex with my husband 3-4 times per week.

There are sex addicts and narcissists and all kinds of f@cked up people with last trauma.

Let’s stop blaming victims. Let’s realize there are a number of completely different reasons people cheat.

And women are cheating in the same numbers these days.

So quit spouting stupid sh@t.

Not PP you are responding to, and it is true that some men cheat when they are still getting action at home. But I really believe those are the rare instances. In reality, most men who cheat in long-term marriages do it because they are not getting sex at home and they do not want do divorce due to splitting kids, custody, housing, etc. No one is dismissing your experience--yes, there are narcissists that cheat on their wives who are sleeping with them, but that is not in every case it is is more the rare situation than the others where men are doing it because they lack physical intimacy in the marriage.

Is this why there are so many married women cheating too? The ones I know of are looking to upgrade and they can get better looking more successful mem when they stay an AP than if they had to go on the free market. The same men would not date them if they were single. They are not in the same class of looks/intelligence.

The point was not about how many married men vs women cheat. The point was the REASON for it.
Men who cheat do so because the wife does want sex (with him).
Women who cheat do so because they are sexually bored with husband but an exciting/new man comes along and courts her.

Haaaahhaaa!!!

Courts her?!?! These women are going after men on websites like Ashley Madison. That isn’t courting. That’s a woman looking for d@ck.

You have a very antiquated notion of women that cheat. They are the aggressor in many instances.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men cheat for sex. Keep your man happy in the bedroom especially when they hit 40-50 and they won’t have the energy to cheat.

STOP! Just stop! I had sex with my husband 3-4 times per week.

There are sex addicts and narcissists and all kinds of f@cked up people with last trauma.

Let’s stop blaming victims. Let’s realize there are a number of completely different reasons people cheat.

And women are cheating in the same numbers these days.

So quit spouting stupid sh@t.

Not PP you are responding to, and it is true that some men cheat when they are still getting action at home. But I really believe those are the rare instances. In reality, most men who cheat in long-term marriages do it because they are not getting sex at home and they do not want do divorce due to splitting kids, custody, housing, etc. No one is dismissing your experience--yes, there are narcissists that cheat on their wives who are sleeping with them, but that is not in every case it is is more the rare situation than the others where men are doing it because they lack physical intimacy in the marriage.

Agreed 1000%. Sure there are a handful of long-term wives who still had plenty of sex (now THAT is a minority right there!) .... yet their husband strayed (this combination is exceedingly small minority).
Most men (married and >30yo) are NOT practicing sex addicts or narcissists. It is not "victim blaming" to state the obvious: a wife who does not want sex can not have a faithful husband.

You are an idiot and obviously not a marriage therapist. These ideas and notions you have are just incorrect.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men cheat for sex. Keep your man happy in the bedroom especially when they hit 40-50 and they won’t have the energy to cheat.

STOP! Just stop! I had sex with my husband 3-4 times per week.

There are sex addicts and narcissists and all kinds of f@cked up people with last trauma.

Let’s stop blaming victims. Let’s realize there are a number of completely different reasons people cheat.

And women are cheating in the same numbers these days.

So quit spouting stupid sh@t.

Not PP you are responding to, and it is true that some men cheat when they are still getting action at home. But I really believe those are the rare instances. In reality, most men who cheat in long-term marriages do it because they are not getting sex at home and they do not want do divorce due to splitting kids, custody, housing, etc. No one is dismissing your experience--yes, there are narcissists that cheat on their wives who are sleeping with them, but that is not in every case it is is more the rare situation than the others where men are doing it because they lack physical intimacy in the marriage.

Is this why there are so many married women cheating too? The ones I know of are looking to upgrade and they can get better looking more successful mem when they stay an AP than if they had to go on the free market. The same men would not date them if they were single. They are not in the same class of looks/intelligence.

The point was not about how many married men vs women cheat. The point was the REASON for it.
Men who cheat do so because the wife does want sex (with him).
Women who cheat do so because they are sexually bored with husband but an exciting/new man comes along and courts her.

Haaaahhaaa!!!

Courts her?!?! These women are going after men on websites like Ashley Madison. That isn’t courting. That’s a woman looking for d@ck.

You have a very antiquated notion of women that cheat. They are the aggressor in many instances.

Yeah. My wife found 3 men willing to f@ck her on good old Ashley Madison. I don’t know how much “courting” was happening in the 30 minutes they met once a month at Marriott or our bedroom

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men cheat for sex. Keep your man happy in the bedroom especially when they hit 40-50 and they won’t have the energy to cheat.

STOP! Just stop! I had sex with my husband 3-4 times per week.

There are sex addicts and narcissists and all kinds of f@cked up people with last trauma.

Let’s stop blaming victims. Let’s realize there are a number of completely different reasons people cheat.

And women are cheating in the same numbers these days.

So quit spouting stupid sh@t.

Not PP you are responding to, and it is true that some men cheat when they are still getting action at home. But I really believe those are the rare instances. In reality, most men who cheat in long-term marriages do it because they are not getting sex at home and they do not want do divorce due to splitting kids, custody, housing, etc. No one is dismissing your experience--yes, there are narcissists that cheat on their wives who are sleeping with them, but that is not in every case it is is more the rare situation than the others where men are doing it because they lack physical intimacy in the marriage.

Agreed 1000%. Sure there are a handful of long-term wives who still had plenty of sex (now THAT is a minority right there!) .... yet their husband strayed (this combination is exceedingly small minority).
Most men (married and >30yo) are NOT practicing sex addicts or narcissists. It is not "victim blaming" to state the obvious: a wife who does not want sex can not have a faithful husband.

You are an idiot and obviously not a marriage therapist. These ideas and notions you have are just incorrect.

What I said is pretty much the same as 2 different prior PPs. Exactly what part is incorrect?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men cheat for sex. Keep your man happy in the bedroom especially when they hit 40-50 and they won’t have the energy to cheat.

STOP! Just stop! I had sex with my husband 3-4 times per week.

There are sex addicts and narcissists and all kinds of f@cked up people with last trauma.

Let’s stop blaming victims. Let’s realize there are a number of completely different reasons people cheat.

And women are cheating in the same numbers these days.

So quit spouting stupid sh@t.

Not PP you are responding to, and it is true that some men cheat when they are still getting action at home. But I really believe those are the rare instances. In reality, most men who cheat in long-term marriages do it because they are not getting sex at home and they do not want do divorce due to splitting kids, custody, housing, etc. No one is dismissing your experience--yes, there are narcissists that cheat on their wives who are sleeping with them, but that is not in every case it is is more the rare situation than the others where men are doing it because they lack physical intimacy in the marriage.

Is this why there are so many married women cheating too? The ones I know of are looking to upgrade and they can get better looking more successful mem when they stay an AP than if they had to go on the free market. The same men would not date them if they were single. They are not in the same class of looks/intelligence.

The point was not about how many married men vs women cheat. The point was the REASON for it.
Men who cheat do so because the wife does want sex (with him).
Women who cheat do so because they are sexually bored with husband but an exciting/new man comes along and courts her.

Haaaahhaaa!!!

Courts her?!?! These women are going after men on websites like Ashley Madison. That isn’t courting. That’s a woman looking for d@ck.

You have a very antiquated notion of women that cheat. They are the aggressor in many instances.

Yeah. My wife found 3 men willing to f@ck her on good old Ashley Madison. I don’t know how much “courting” was happening in the 30 minutes they met once a month at Marriott or our bedroom

Some women are just sluts. Just like men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men cheat for sex. Keep your man happy in the bedroom especially when they hit 40-50 and they won’t have the energy to cheat.

STOP! Just stop! I had sex with my husband 3-4 times per week.

There are sex addicts and narcissists and all kinds of f@cked up people with last trauma.

Let’s stop blaming victims. Let’s realize there are a number of completely different reasons people cheat.

And women are cheating in the same numbers these days.

So quit spouting stupid sh@t.

Not PP you are responding to, and it is true that some men cheat when they are still getting action at home. But I really believe those are the rare instances. In reality, most men who cheat in long-term marriages do it because they are not getting sex at home and they do not want do divorce due to splitting kids, custody, housing, etc. No one is dismissing your experience--yes, there are narcissists that cheat on their wives who are sleeping with them, but that is not in every case it is is more the rare situation than the others where men are doing it because they lack physical intimacy in the marriage.

Is this why there are so many married women cheating too? The ones I know of are looking to upgrade and they can get better looking more successful mem when they stay an AP than if they had to go on the free market. The same men would not date them if they were single. They are not in the same class of looks/intelligence.

The point was not about how many married men vs women cheat. The point was the REASON for it.
Men who cheat do so because the wife does want sex (with him).
Women who cheat do so because they are sexually bored with husband but an exciting/new man comes along and courts her.

Haaaahhaaa!!!

Courts her?!?! These women are going after men on websites like Ashley Madison. That isn’t courting. That’s a woman looking for d@ck.

You have a very antiquated notion of women that cheat. They are the aggressor in many instances.

Yeah. My wife found 3 men willing to f@ck her on good old Ashley Madison. I don’t know how much “courting” was happening in the 30 minutes they met once a month at Marriott or our bedroom

No disagreement that any woman who actively wants sex can easily find that / no courting necessary. But many wives, though bored/disinterested in husband, are not prowling around actively seeking sex. Instead they are "receptive" to the new guy who appears and makes her feel desired. I am thinking there are more of the later than the former.

[Anonymous]

^ my point is they aren’t “appearing” . Many of these married women are the ones hitting on their neighbors and kid’s friend’s father or soccer coach. They have online dating profiles and screw men while their spouse is at work and kids are at school. It’s naive to think they just fell under somebody’s spell when they are actively throwing their p@ssy at men.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^ my point is they aren’t “appearing” . Many of these married women are the ones hitting on their neighbors and kid’s friend’s father or soccer coach. They have online dating profiles and screw men while their spouse is at work and kids are at school. It’s naive to think they just fell under somebody’s spell when they are actively throwing their p@ssy at men.

100%. This

3 divorces I know the wife did one of the above

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ my point is they aren’t “appearing” . Many of these married women are the ones hitting on their neighbors and kid’s friend’s father or soccer coach. They have online dating profiles and screw men while their spouse is at work and kids are at school. It’s naive to think they just fell under somebody’s spell when they are actively throwing their p@ssy at men.

100%. This

3 divorces I know the wife did one of the above

Yeah. A new guy doesn’t just “appear” unless they have created their account and profile and are corresponding. But most women when caught blame it on the man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Some women are just sluts. Just like men.

Enough with the slut-shaming. Choose to have sex. Choose not to. Be responsible for your choices and the consequences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Men cheat for sex. Keep your man happy in the bedroom especially when they hit 40-50 and they won’t have the energy to cheat.

STOP! Just stop! I had sex with my husband 3-4 times per week.

There are sex addicts and narcissists and all kinds of f@cked up people with last trauma.

Let’s stop blaming victims. Let’s realize there are a number of completely different reasons people cheat.

And women are cheating in the same numbers these days.

So quit spouting stupid sh@t.

Not PP you are responding to, and it is true that some men cheat when they are still getting action at home. But I really believe those are the rare instances. In reality, most men who cheat in long-term marriages do it because they are not getting sex at home and they do not want do divorce due to splitting kids, custody, housing, etc. No one is dismissing your experience--yes, there are narcissists that cheat on their wives who are sleeping with them, but that is not in every case it is is more the rare situation than the others where men are doing it because they lack physical intimacy in the marriage.

Is this why there are so many married women cheating too? The ones I know of are looking to upgrade and they can get better looking more successful mem when they stay an AP than if they had to go on the free market. The same men would not date them if they were single. They are not in the same class of looks/intelligence.

The point was not about how many married men vs women cheat. The point was the REASON for it.
Men who cheat do so because the wife does want sex (with him).
Women who cheat do so because they are sexually bored with husband but an exciting/new man comes along and courts her.

Haaaahhaaa!!!

Courts her?!?! These women are going after men on websites like Ashley Madison. That isn’t courting. That’s a woman looking for d@ck.

You have a very antiquated notion of women that cheat. They are the aggressor in many instances.

Most are looking for exit affairs. They are trying to move up a lifestyle. They will get used and then dumped.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ my point is they aren’t “appearing” . Many of these married women are the ones hitting on their neighbors and kid’s friend’s father or soccer coach. They have online dating profiles and screw men while their spouse is at work and kids are at school. It’s naive to think they just fell under somebody’s spell when they are actively throwing their p@ssy at men.

100%. This

3 divorces I know the wife did one of the above

Same here. It was the mom that cheated in almost every divorce I’ve heard about in the past couple of years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:^ my point is they aren’t “appearing” . Many of these married women are the ones hitting on their neighbors and kid’s friend’s father or soccer coach. They have online dating profiles and screw men while their spouse is at work and kids are at school. It’s naive to think they just fell under somebody’s spell when they are actively throwing their p@ssy at men.

100%. This

3 divorces I know the wife did one of the above

Same here. It was the mom that cheated in almost every divorce I’ve heard about in the past couple of years.

It’s often women that settled and were never in love. They cheat on the man they took for granted and supplied the income. They harp on him that they want “more”. They are envious of others lifestyles...so they go out and try to find a new married guy to upgrade or to just land softly and have a different man now support them. The sad part is that these guys would never date them if they were single. The vetting process for a side piece off of a dating app is “discretion and availability”. It doesn’t go into much else.

[Anonymous]

Some of you are so heavily biased the poison of your own biased projection just drips from every word. There are a lot of cheaters. No comment here is more valid than another on how or why they cheat. It is all speculation based on everyone’s anecdotal evidence.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I was watching the Jerry Springer show today and it reminded me of the women of DCUM who say they dated or married a former cheater without caring if they cheated in the past. Most of the women on the show were redneck or trashy but I guess I expected women with higher standards in this area?

OP, no matter how much wealth, wisdom, status you have — hurt people are going to hurt people, until they heal their wounds. Some are better at hiding their problems than others.