Collecting friends' phones

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you going to take my kids inhaler? His bottle of Advil? Anything else he has proven himself responsible enough to have?

When you take something from a child that their parents have decided they are mature enough to handle, it is insulting to the parents who have raised their kids to be responsible.

Oh, give me a break.

[Anonymous]

No interest in taking those from your kid. Happy to take their internet as I monitor my own kids internet use, but am not about to moderate you kids. Easier for all that way. Your child is welcome to not come over, with medicine and inhalers and phones they sound high maintenance anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No interest in taking those from your kid. Happy to take their internet as I monitor my own kids internet use, but am not about to moderate you kids. Easier for all that way. Your child is welcome to not come over, with medicine and inhalers and phones they sound high maintenance anyway.

So just because your kids weren't raised right and can't be trusted, you've decided to try to put that on other people's kids?

[Anonymous]

I think it's a great idea.

[Anonymous]

Nope. My kids are too young to handle the entire internet and social media. They are still learning about ways to protect your identity and the importance of 100% wise posting/photo sharing on social media. It's really so inconceivable to you that some parents protect their kids - and perhaps in different ways than you do?

[Anonymous]

Basically the only opinions AGAINST this practice boil down to "because I said so." With no open mind to the good that can come out of it. Surely if your child needed to call you three could ask the host's mom if they could use their phone. Here is absolutely nothing wrong with that and I'm certain no parent would deny that to a guest. You simply refuse to see any good in it because HOW DARE SOMEONE ELSE BOSS AROUND MY LITTLE PRINCESS!

And I'm quite sure if you ask any parent of a kid who participated in cyber bullying or questionable online behavior, they'd say "I didn't raise my child to do that." So cut the crap with the "I raised my child right" excuse.

Your arguments are simply ones of absolute entitlement no matter what. So just own it. Don't pretend like there's some reason like little Johnny is going to be molested in the middle of the night and need to call home because you have a better chance of winning the Powerball than of 1) that happening and 2) your child actually using the phone AS it's happening anyway. Own your selfish entitlement, people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Basically the only opinions AGAINST this practice boil down to "because I said so." With no open mind to the good that can come out of it. Surely if your child needed to call you three could ask the host's mom if they could use their phone. Here is absolutely nothing wrong with that and I'm certain no parent would deny that to a guest. You simply refuse to see any good in it because HOW DARE SOMEONE ELSE BOSS AROUND MY LITTLE PRINCESS!

And I'm quite sure if you ask any parent of a kid who participated in cyber bullying or questionable online behavior, they'd say "I didn't raise my child to do that." So cut the crap with the "I raised my child right" excuse.

Your arguments are simply ones of absolute entitlement no matter what. So just own it. Don't pretend like there's some reason like little Johnny is going to be molested in the middle of the night and need to call home because you have a better chance of winning the Powerball than of 1) that happening and 2) your child actually using the phone AS it's happening anyway. Own your selfish entitlement, people.

right. Because if someone molests your kid, they should just ask if they can use their phone to call home.

[Anonymous]

Why are you letting your kids go to a molesters home, anyway?

I know the parents really well if I'm alllowing a sleepover. I get feeing like your kid needs a phone if you know that they are in a dangerous situation. Sleepovers aren't dangerous situations in our home.

[Anonymous]

I'm pretty sure this thread is funded by the same parents who swore their fetus would never eat anything that isn't organic, or play with anything plastic, or play a video game.
It's all going to happen, and you're going to change your tune when you're known as a crazy helicopter mom and your kid looses all their friends. Just wait for it. It's coming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DD is 13. I am ok with collecting phones as well as not collecting phones.

If you had asked me a couple years ago, I would have said NO to collecting the phones and given lots of reasons why similar to the ones on this thread.

But with all things, once you have had more experience, your opinion changes.

In terms of social media, my own child is cautious about what she posts but other girls (and boys are not). Embarrassing photos happen and kids do think it's funny to post them at times. They are young and just lack a filter. Chaperoning a few events for my DD's and her friends, I realize I have forgot what stupid stuff kids find funny when you are 12 and 13.

There are plenty of kids with finsta accounts or spam accounts and sometimes your kid won't have access to those accounts so they don't even know what is being posted about them until it's too late. Add in that not all kids in the early teen years have all the same social media accounts. Half of the kids seem to have snap chat and half don't.

In terms of trying to reach me and if anything happened in the middle of the night, I realize that it is going to be the rare kid who has their wits about them if something really bad happens in the middle of the night to contact their parents right away. Most kids in a dark, unknown house if something bad happens, they would be too frightened and unnerved to do anything except wait until morning. I have had some of my DD's friends who are super outgoing and know our home well be too scared to even get up in the middle of the night and walk a few feet to the bathroom bc it's dark and they just are nervous about not being at home. They are afraid of turning on lights, flushing the toilet, turning on the sink and waking up people in the house, etc.

So in short, I tell my child to go along with the house rules.

At our house, I ask that they put their phones in the kitchen on our charger stand to charge for the night. We have no house phone but we do have a house cell phone that we keep in our upstairs hallway on an easily accessible table that has call and text capability.

I'm in agreement with all of this. Add to this that I have boys, and they seem (to me, with no daughters) even more likely to post embarrassing photos in the name of humor. They can "talk the talk" about cyber-bullying and what is/is not appropriate to post after being educated at school and at home, but I find in practice tweens/teens really have little appreciation for these matters in the heat of the moment when with friends. Not saying that lack of appreciation has changed since I was a teen, but the ability to disclose things instantly, publicly and permantently certainly has.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No interest in taking those from your kid. Happy to take their internet as I monitor my own kids internet use, but am not about to moderate you kids. Easier for all that way. Your child is welcome to not come over, with medicine and inhalers and phones they sound high maintenance anyway.

Wow.

You are an awful person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope. My kids are too young to handle the entire internet and social media. They are still learning about ways to protect your identity and the importance of 100% wise posting/photo sharing on social media. It's really so inconceivable to you that some parents protect their kids - and perhaps in different ways than you do?

At 13, which is the kids' age in the OP, your kids might be too young to handle the Internet and social media. My kids are not. Chances are, your kids are too immature for my kids anyway so this issue during a sleepover won't be an issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Basically the only opinions AGAINST this practice boil down to "because I said so." With no open mind to the good that can come out of it. Surely if your child needed to call you three could ask the host's mom if they could use their phone. Here is absolutely nothing wrong with that and I'm certain no parent would deny that to a guest. You simply refuse to see any good in it because HOW DARE SOMEONE ELSE BOSS AROUND MY LITTLE PRINCESS!

And I'm quite sure if you ask any parent of a kid who participated in cyber bullying or questionable online behavior, they'd say "I didn't raise my child to do that." So cut the crap with the "I raised my child right" excuse.

Your arguments are simply ones of absolute entitlement no matter what. So just own it. Don't pretend like there's some reason like little Johnny is going to be molested in the middle of the night and need to call home because you have a better chance of winning the Powerball than of 1) that happening and 2) your child actually using the phone AS it's happening anyway. Own your selfish entitlement, people.

The only argument FOR it boils down to:

1. Kids can't be trusted not to post sleepover photos to social media.
2. Phones interfere with socializing and creativity.

[Anonymous]

I've watched my kids interact with friends and I'd say it seems 90% of the dialogue revolves around phones - group chats, taking pictures, snapchatting stories, fake instagram goof photos, showing a funny meme, watching youtube clips.

It all seems so pointless and stupid. If only all parents were on board of the no phone rule...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I've watched my kids interact with friends and I'd say it seems 90% of the dialogue revolves around phones - group chats, taking pictures, snapchatting stories, fake instagram goof photos, showing a funny meme, watching youtube clips.

It all seems so pointless and stupid. If only all parents were on board of the no phone rule...

If only all parents would stop trying to dictate how their teens interact with friends. So what if 90% of the dialogue revolves around phones?