If my teenager gets a job during his time with Dad . . .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

I told him that that he couldn't get a job that conflicted with his commitments and named both his scheduled time with Dad, and the activities that Dad insists he do as commitments. How that's me saying "yes" I don't know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

I told him that that he couldn't get a job that conflicted with his commitments and named both his scheduled time with Dad, and the activities that Dad insists he do as commitments. How that's me saying "yes" I don't know.

Then, where is the issue. It conflicts with dads time so you tell he he cannot work during those hours and tell him the hours he can work. You are putting it on dad to say no. You are the primary parent who agreed to a job so you need to enforce the rules. Dad cannot do that with a weekly visit. It would be wrong of him to say no when you are saying yes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

I told him that that he couldn't get a job that conflicted with his commitments and named both his scheduled time with Dad, and the activities that Dad insists he do as commitments. How that's me saying "yes" I don't know.

Then, where is the issue. It conflicts with dads time so you tell he he cannot work during those hours and tell him the hours he can work. You are putting it on dad to say no. You are the primary parent who agreed to a job so you need to enforce the rules. Dad cannot do that with a weekly visit. It would be wrong of him to say no when you are saying yes.

I did tell him that. I said you can not get a job that conflicts with your commitment to seeing your Dad on Sundays. That is literally what I told him. I said you can only work if you can find a job that is on the weekend (due to sports and HW) and doesn't interfere with sporting competitions (various times on Saturday) church, or your visit with Dad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

I told him that that he couldn't get a job that conflicted with his commitments and named both his scheduled time with Dad, and the activities that Dad insists he do as commitments. How that's me saying "yes" I don't know.

Then, where is the issue. It conflicts with dads time so you tell he he cannot work during those hours and tell him the hours he can work. You are putting it on dad to say no. You are the primary parent who agreed to a job so you need to enforce the rules. Dad cannot do that with a weekly visit. It would be wrong of him to say no when you are saying yes.

I did tell him that. I said you can not get a job that conflicts with your commitment to seeing your Dad on Sundays. That is literally what I told him. I said you can only work if you can find a job that is on the weekend (due to sports and HW) and doesn't interfere with sporting competitions (various times on Saturday) church, or your visit with Dad.

So, what is the issue? You are creating drama. You said no, kid talked to Dad who probably didn't know you said that and said yes, to support you and the kid took the job or wants to take the job. It interferes with visitation so you should say no. But, instead, you let him take the job so there is no issue anymore. It makes no sense to say to find one given that kind of schedule. He can work summers. What are you looking for except to vilify Dad as the bad one when you should never have allowed a school year job in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

I told him that that he couldn't get a job that conflicted with his commitments and named both his scheduled time with Dad, and the activities that Dad insists he do as commitments. How that's me saying "yes" I don't know.

Then, where is the issue. It conflicts with dads time so you tell he he cannot work during those hours and tell him the hours he can work. You are putting it on dad to say no. You are the primary parent who agreed to a job so you need to enforce the rules. Dad cannot do that with a weekly visit. It would be wrong of him to say no when you are saying yes.

I did tell him that. I said you can not get a job that conflicts with your commitment to seeing your Dad on Sundays. That is literally what I told him. I said you can only work if you can find a job that is on the weekend (due to sports and HW) and doesn't interfere with sporting competitions (various times on Saturday) church, or your visit with Dad.

So, what is the issue? You are creating drama. You said no, kid talked to Dad who probably didn't know you said that and said yes, to support you and the kid took the job or wants to take the job. It interferes with visitation so you should say no. But, instead, you let him take the job so there is no issue anymore. It makes no sense to say to find one given that kind of schedule. He can work summers. What are you looking for except to vilify Dad as the bad one when you should never have allowed a school year job in the first place.

And who is making up the lost income to the kid? I hope his dad plans to pay for a car, insurance, college, and anything else the kid would have been doing with the money from a job. Jobs around here start at about $20/hour, kid was going to work one shift, dad should write him a check for $8,000.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

DP. You clearly hate children of divorced parents and think they should suffer for their parents inability to stay married. All is his peers are going to have parents who pay to put them through college and part time jobs if they want spending money, and you think he should get neither to protect his dads schedule.

[Anonymous]

So, when you have older kids, like driving age, they likely will be working/activities and you're going to see them less. Regardless if the parents are married or not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

I told him that that he couldn't get a job that conflicted with his commitments and named both his scheduled time with Dad, and the activities that Dad insists he do as commitments. How that's me saying "yes" I don't know.

Then, where is the issue. It conflicts with dads time so you tell he he cannot work during those hours and tell him the hours he can work. You are putting it on dad to say no. You are the primary parent who agreed to a job so you need to enforce the rules. Dad cannot do that with a weekly visit. It would be wrong of him to say no when you are saying yes.

I did tell him that. I said you can not get a job that conflicts with your commitment to seeing your Dad on Sundays. That is literally what I told him. I said you can only work if you can find a job that is on the weekend (due to sports and HW) and doesn't interfere with sporting competitions (various times on Saturday) church, or your visit with Dad.

So, what is the issue? You are creating drama. You said no, kid talked to Dad who probably didn't know you said that and said yes, to support you and the kid took the job or wants to take the job. It interferes with visitation so you should say no. But, instead, you let him take the job so there is no issue anymore. It makes no sense to say to find one given that kind of schedule. He can work summers. What are you looking for except to vilify Dad as the bad one when you should never have allowed a school year job in the first place.

And who is making up the lost income to the kid? I hope his dad plans to pay for a car, insurance, college, and anything else the kid would have been doing with the money from a job. Jobs around here start at about $20/hour, kid was going to work one shift, dad should write him a check for $8,000.

If OP is getting child support Dad is paying his fair share and that goes to the child's needs. College is after 18 and that is voluntary, just like with married parents. Same for car and car insurance. You are absurd. Kid can work summers. You clearly value money over relationships.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: So, when you have older kids, like driving age, they likely will be working/activities and you're going to see them less. Regardless if the parents are married or not.

Dad gets one day a week. This is a copout of saying why this is ok. Either way, Mom agreed to it, Dad supported it, Kid took the job so its a non-issue and Mom is upset as she wanted Dad to be the bad guy and say no and instead he supported her decision to let him work. She was clear Dad thinks if kid made a commitment he should follow through. Kid committed with Mom's blessing so even if he didn't agree as a parent he had an obligation to support Mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

DP. You clearly hate children of divorced parents and think they should suffer for their parents inability to stay married. All is his peers are going to have parents who pay to put them through college and part time jobs if they want spending money, and you think he should get neither to protect his dads schedule.

Divorce has nothing to do with it. There is nothing here about college and regardless of marriage, some parents pay for college and others don't. But, a good way to guarantee Dad doesn't pay for college is terminating the relationship. Why should Dad pay for college for a child he has no relationship with? Ever think of that. No one here is saying Dad is cutting off the child. And, one is assuming child is getting child support. People like you who terminate the relationships or only support limited relationships are the very ones who complain about Dad's paying for extra's by why should they if they don't have a relationship with the child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

DP. You clearly hate children of divorced parents and think they should suffer for their parents inability to stay married. All is his peers are going to have parents who pay to put them through college and part time jobs if they want spending money, and you think he should get neither to protect his dads schedule.

Divorce has nothing to do with it. There is nothing here about college and regardless of marriage, some parents pay for college and others don't. But, a good way to guarantee Dad doesn't pay for college is terminating the relationship. Why should Dad pay for college for a child he has no relationship with? Ever think of that. No one here is saying Dad is cutting off the child. And, one is assuming child is getting child support. People like you who terminate the relationships or only support limited relationships are the very ones who complain about Dad's paying for extra's by why should they if they don't have a relationship with the child.

Divorce has everything to do with it— if his parents were still married he could have a job. It’s because they aren’t married that he has to live by a special set of rules to protect his dad’s convenience. He’s going to be disadvantaged enough and you want to pile more burdens on the kid to make the dad’s life easier.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

I told him that that he couldn't get a job that conflicted with his commitments and named both his scheduled time with Dad, and the activities that Dad insists he do as commitments. How that's me saying "yes" I don't know.

Then, where is the issue. It conflicts with dads time so you tell he he cannot work during those hours and tell him the hours he can work. You are putting it on dad to say no. You are the primary parent who agreed to a job so you need to enforce the rules. Dad cannot do that with a weekly visit. It would be wrong of him to say no when you are saying yes.

I did tell him that. I said you can not get a job that conflicts with your commitment to seeing your Dad on Sundays. That is literally what I told him. I said you can only work if you can find a job that is on the weekend (due to sports and HW) and doesn't interfere with sporting competitions (various times on Saturday) church, or your visit with Dad.

So, what is the issue? You are creating drama. You said no, kid talked to Dad who probably didn't know you said that and said yes, to support you and the kid took the job or wants to take the job. It interferes with visitation so you should say no. But, instead, you let him take the job so there is no issue anymore. It makes no sense to say to find one given that kind of schedule. He can work summers. What are you looking for except to vilify Dad as the bad one when you should never have allowed a school year job in the first place.

And who is making up the lost income to the kid? I hope his dad plans to pay for a car, insurance, college, and anything else the kid would have been doing with the money from a job. Jobs around here start at about $20/hour, kid was going to work one shift, dad should write him a check for $8,000.

If OP is getting child support Dad is paying his fair share and that goes to the child's needs. College is after 18 and that is voluntary, just like with married parents. Same for car and car insurance. You are absurd. Kid can work summers. You clearly value money over relationships.

It’s “voluntary” meaning Dad probably isn’t paying. So if the kid wants to live like his peers he has to find a way to pay for car, insurance, etc. keeping him from getting a job just creates more disadvantages for him, which should bother his father more than some internet strangers…

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

DP. You clearly hate children of divorced parents and think they should suffer for their parents inability to stay married. All is his peers are going to have parents who pay to put them through college and part time jobs if they want spending money, and you think he should get neither to protect his dads schedule.

Divorce has nothing to do with it. There is nothing here about college and regardless of marriage, some parents pay for college and others don't. But, a good way to guarantee Dad doesn't pay for college is terminating the relationship. Why should Dad pay for college for a child he has no relationship with? Ever think of that. No one here is saying Dad is cutting off the child. And, one is assuming child is getting child support. People like you who terminate the relationships or only support limited relationships are the very ones who complain about Dad's paying for extra's by why should they if they don't have a relationship with the child.

Divorce has everything to do with it— if his parents were still married he could have a job. It’s because they aren’t married that he has to live by a special set of rules to protect his dad’s convenience. He’s going to be disadvantaged enough and you want to pile more burdens on the kid to make the dad’s life easier.

You are making it about divorce when it isn't. There is a prearranged schedule that is court ordered. OP should honor it but she choose not to and is creating drama where there isn't. Like in any family, things go on. If parents were married, and they had church, usually the answer would be no. OP did not want to say no, so she hoped he couldn't find a job and when he did and accepted it, she then hoped Dad would say no. Dad supported mom's decision and now you and OP are making a big deal over it when its not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That poster that keeps insisting you made the kid find a job is a troll and a misogynistic one. Ignore.

It's actually kind of useful for me to see his responses. You see, my kids father can also be a misogynistic idiot with very limited reading comprehension. So, it's helpful to be able to understand the ways he might be misunderstanding a situation.

-- OP

You clearly hate men and don't want your child to have a relationship with Dad or it would have been a no from the start. You agreed to the job and wanted him to say no. You did the bad parenting, not him. He had no choice but to support your decision. There was no misunderstanding. You said to look and get a job, the kid did. You counted on none allowing the schedule as a way to say no and it backfired on you. So, now you blame Dad for supporting your decision vs. taking responsibility. You failed, not him. You won but stopped the visit. Yea you.

I told him that that he couldn't get a job that conflicted with his commitments and named both his scheduled time with Dad, and the activities that Dad insists he do as commitments. How that's me saying "yes" I don't know.

Then, where is the issue. It conflicts with dads time so you tell he he cannot work during those hours and tell him the hours he can work. You are putting it on dad to say no. You are the primary parent who agreed to a job so you need to enforce the rules. Dad cannot do that with a weekly visit. It would be wrong of him to say no when you are saying yes.

I did tell him that. I said you can not get a job that conflicts with your commitment to seeing your Dad on Sundays. That is literally what I told him. I said you can only work if you can find a job that is on the weekend (due to sports and HW) and doesn't interfere with sporting competitions (various times on Saturday) church, or your visit with Dad.

So, what is the issue? You are creating drama. You said no, kid talked to Dad who probably didn't know you said that and said yes, to support you and the kid took the job or wants to take the job. It interferes with visitation so you should say no. But, instead, you let him take the job so there is no issue anymore. It makes no sense to say to find one given that kind of schedule. He can work summers. What are you looking for except to vilify Dad as the bad one when you should never have allowed a school year job in the first place.

And who is making up the lost income to the kid? I hope his dad plans to pay for a car, insurance, college, and anything else the kid would have been doing with the money from a job. Jobs around here start at about $20/hour, kid was going to work one shift, dad should write him a check for $8,000.

If OP is getting child support Dad is paying his fair share and that goes to the child's needs. College is after 18 and that is voluntary, just like with married parents. Same for car and car insurance. You are absurd. Kid can work summers. You clearly value money over relationships.

It’s “voluntary” meaning Dad probably isn’t paying. So if the kid wants to live like his peers he has to find a way to pay for car, insurance, etc. keeping him from getting a job just creates more disadvantages for him, which should bother his father more than some internet strangers…

You must live in a very privileged world as very few teens I know have cars. Mom can also pay for car insurance and a car if she chooses to allow those things between her income and child support.

You are creating issues that aren't there nor did OP bring up. She never said why he wanted to work. Maybe it is because she chooses not to spend the child support on the son and for other things. One could speculate any reason. But, most teens don't have cars, so you should check your privilege. At best they drive their parents cars.