If my teenager gets a job during his time with Dad . . .

[Anonymous]

My kids' dad complains he doesn't get enough time. But he also just told my kid it's fine if he works on the one day of the week (Sunday) he's got court ordered time.

I am trying to sort out if I tell my teen "no, you need to see Dad", or do I leave this between them?

[Anonymous]

Why would you get into the middle of this if they have worked it out between them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why would you get into the middle of this if they have worked it out between them?

Because I can imagine it coming up in court if my kid hasn't been to his court ordered visitation in months, and I want to protect myself and my kid from claims of parental alienation?

[Anonymous]

Leave it between them but send an email confirming the arrangement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you get into the middle of this if they have worked it out between them?

Because I can imagine it coming up in court if my kid hasn't been to his court ordered visitation in months, and I want to protect myself and my kid from claims of parental alienation?

Get him to confirm by email that he’s okay with your son getting a job that may require shifts on your ex’s visitation time.

[Anonymous]

How is this a question? Dad gets one day a week. He can work the other 6 days. You are the parent. Its not for them to work out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How is this a question? Dad gets one day a week. He can work the other 6 days. You are the parent. Its not for them to work out.

He has this thing called school on five of those days.

Are you saying that Dad isn't a parent?

[Anonymous]

Nobody will hire your kid for one day a week anyway.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nobody will hire your kid for one day a week anyway.

He has an interview for a place looking for someone for Sundays.

[Anonymous]

What the heck? It’s between them. If you want to ask your ex how he feels about it, you could do that. Is he sacrificing his time so your son is able to work? If so, so you want to share that sacrifice and give your ex a little more time with your son? Check with your son about how he feels giving up some of his dad time for a job. Otherwise, I’d stay out of it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nobody will hire your kid for one day a week anyway.

He has an interview for a place looking for someone for Sundays.

Then tell him to decline the interview and look for a place that needs him Saturdays.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What the heck? It’s between them. If you want to ask your ex how he feels about it, you could do that. Is he sacrificing his time so your son is able to work? If so, so you want to share that sacrifice and give your ex a little more time with your son? Check with your son about how he feels giving up some of his dad time for a job. Otherwise, I’d stay out of it.

That's not fair to the ex because Mom is saying go ahead and take the job and Dad has visitation, not even parenting time or an option on his son's life. You are putting Dad in a bad situation as he becomes the bad guy saying no and if child does it anyway, what recourse is there because mom is allowing it and child lives with mom. If you want to stop the relationship be honest and don't play games. But, if kid is working, he can support himself so Dad shouldn't pay child support.

Or, you be decent and talk to dad and see if visit can be switched to saturdays.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:How is this a question? Dad gets one day a week. He can work the other 6 days. You are the parent. Its not for them to work out.

He has this thing called school on five of those days.

Are you saying that Dad isn't a parent?

No, Dad isn't a parent. He's a visitor in the child's life and a child support check. IF child is so busy there is no need for him to work during the school year. Or, he can work Saturday.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you get into the middle of this if they have worked it out between them?

Because I can imagine it coming up in court if my kid hasn't been to his court ordered visitation in months, and I want to protect myself and my kid from claims of parental alienation?

Get him to confirm by email that he’s okay with your son getting a job that may require shifts on your ex’s visitation time.

This. Even better if dad is the one transporting the kid to work, or the kid is leaving from dad's house to go to work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why would you get into the middle of this if they have worked it out between them?

Because I can imagine it coming up in court if my kid hasn't been to his court ordered visitation in months, and I want to protect myself and my kid from claims of parental alienation?

Get him to confirm by email that he’s okay with your son getting a job that may require shifts on your ex’s visitation time.

This. Even better if dad is the one transporting the kid to work, or the kid is leaving from dad's house to go to work.

Dad doesn't have custody. He has visitation. Mom should transport if she's not allowing the visits to happen.