Dating Strategy: Late Thirties Female

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please help. I am looking to marry and have a child within the next few years.

I’m looking for the following in a man:
- character and integrity
- intelligence
- income 200k+ ( I make 150k)
- wants family and a child
- interested in health and fitness
- emotionally regulated
- interested in travel

Where and how can I find my person in the dev area? Any specific professions? Neighborhoods? Places of gathering?

I’m 38, slender and am told I’m pretty and look 32. Only dates I’ve met comment on how young I look and how nice my legs are. I’ve also been told I’m “elegant” and that they want to take me to a gala.

I don’t know what that says about me.

Please help! Any guidance would be amazing!

Just one data point. I meet your criteria. Been very focused on my career, so single, no drama, no baggage, aged 39. I date 25 to 32, no exceptions, because biology is a fact of life. Sorry to bear the news, but a few similarly situated male friends have the same rule. And all my other friends are married with kids. Good luck, though.

Why is a 39 year old single guy hanging out on DCUM? I call bs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please help. I am looking to marry and have a child within the next few years.

I’m looking for the following in a man:
- character and integrity
- intelligence
- income 200k+ ( I make 150k)
- wants family and a child
- interested in health and fitness
- emotionally regulated
- interested in travel

Where and how can I find my person in the dev area? Any specific professions? Neighborhoods? Places of gathering?

I’m 38, slender and am told I’m pretty and look 32. Only dates I’ve met comment on how young I look and how nice my legs are. I’ve also been told I’m “elegant” and that they want to take me to a gala.

I don’t know what that says about me.

Please help! Any guidance would be amazing!

Just one data point. I meet your criteria. Been very focused on my career, so single, no drama, no baggage, aged 39. I date 25 to 32, no exceptions, because biology is a fact of life. Sorry to bear the news, but a few similarly situated male friends have the same rule. And all my other friends are married with kids. Good luck, though.

Why is a 39 year old single guy hanging out on DCUM? I call bs.

Cause past GF put me on to it and the snark is amazing. Passes the time on the train or between clients.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please help. I am looking to marry and have a child within the next few years.

I’m looking for the following in a man:
- character and integrity
- intelligence
- income 200k+ ( I make 150k)
- wants family and a child
- interested in health and fitness
- emotionally regulated
- interested in travel

Where and how can I find my person in the dev area? Any specific professions? Neighborhoods? Places of gathering?

I’m 38, slender and am told I’m pretty and look 32. Only dates I’ve met comment on how young I look and how nice my legs are. I’ve also been told I’m “elegant” and that they want to take me to a gala.

I don’t know what that says about me.

Please help! Any guidance would be amazing!

Just one data point. I meet your criteria. Been very focused on my career, so single, no drama, no baggage, aged 39. I date 25 to 32, no exceptions, because biology is a fact of life. Sorry to bear the news, but a few similarly situated male friends have the same rule. And all my other friends are married with kids. Good luck, though.

Why is a 39 year old single guy hanging out on DCUM? I call bs.

There is no way I would have dated a 39 year old when I was that young. I wouldn't have dated a 39 year old till I was at least 34. I remember going on a date with a 39 year old when I was 31 and feeling like he was way too old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please help. I am looking to marry and have a child within the next few years.

I’m looking for the following in a man:
- character and integrity
- intelligence
- income 200k+ ( I make 150k)
- wants family and a child
- interested in health and fitness
- emotionally regulated
- interested in travel

Where and how can I find my person in the dev area? Any specific professions? Neighborhoods? Places of gathering?

I’m 38, slender and am told I’m pretty and look 32. Only dates I’ve met comment on how young I look and how nice my legs are. I’ve also been told I’m “elegant” and that they want to take me to a gala.

I don’t know what that says about me.

Please help! Any guidance would be amazing!

Just one data point. I meet your criteria. Been very focused on my career, so single, no drama, no baggage, aged 39. I date 25 to 32, no exceptions, because biology is a fact of life. Sorry to bear the news, but a few similarly situated male friends have the same rule. And all my other friends are married with kids. Good luck, though.

Why is a 39 year old single guy hanging out on DCUM? I call bs.

There is no way I would have dated a 39 year old when I was that young. I wouldn't have dated a 39 year old till I was at least 34. I remember going on a date with a 39 year old when I was 31 and feeling like he was way too old.

Remember how OP is 38 but "looks 32". Well, us guys can do that, too, and without the biological fertility implications. Women typically me I look quite a bit younger. Started hitting the gym about 8 years ago, getting some sun, etc. Typical nerdy career arc. Didn't really exercise or lift until I was rich with a stable career.

[Anonymous]

This is how I did it in 18 months, fresh off a divorce. I was 37. I went on many dates with multiple men using, OLD, friend introductions, and IRL happenstance. I wasnt afraid to tell people I'm looking. I basically went on a date every weeknight and 2 on Saturday. Sunday was a day of rest.

About 4 months into it, I met someone and we dated exclusively for 6 months and got engaged. We had the wedding a few months later. I did IVF, and now I have a wonderful family.

What really helped was therapy and working through all my issues before getting married. You want to start off with a fresh slate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is how I did it in 18 months, fresh off a divorce. I was 37. I went on many dates with multiple men using, OLD, friend introductions, and IRL happenstance. I wasnt afraid to tell people I'm looking. I basically went on a date every weeknight and 2 on Saturday. Sunday was a day of rest.

About 4 months into it, I met someone and we dated exclusively for 6 months and got engaged. We had the wedding a few months later. I did IVF, and now I have a wonderful family.

What really helped was therapy and working through all my issues before getting married. You want to start off with a fresh slate.

Love how you were hitting the streets but still observing the Lord's Day. *respect*

[Anonymous]

Man here (happily married). I have a few single male friends in their 40s. All are entrepreneurs like me. In their case, they spent a lot of time focusing on building their businesses. Two of them got married recently. Both married women late 20's to early 30s. Their goal was to settle down and have a family, now that their businesses were successful. None of them would go for a woman in her late 30s -- too high a chance of infertility.

Also based on how OP writes, they would not go for OP as it takes a certain type of personality to be an entrepreneur and doesn't seem like OP fits that adventurous risk-taking mold, so that group is probably not ideal for her anyway.

I guess single fathers are the best option, as they won't want any more kids.

[Anonymous]

you could look younger than 36? Plenty of 35 and 34 year old guys out there

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

With all those great qualities, most women will look past height. I certainly would. He's a catch!

Nope. OP WANTS kids. This is the worst potential ever for a woman who wants kids. He will date her for a year and decide he doesn't want kids.

OP needs a man who wants kids yesterday. And she needs him today. Or she needs IVF and frozen embryos.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please help. I am looking to marry and have a child within the next few years.

I’m looking for the following in a man:
- character and integrity
- intelligence
- income 200k+ ( I make 150k)
- wants family and a child
- interested in health and fitness
- emotionally regulated
- interested in travel

Where and how can I find my person in the dev area? Any specific professions? Neighborhoods? Places of gathering?

I’m 38, slender and am told I’m pretty and look 32. Only dates I’ve met comment on how young I look and how nice my legs are. I’ve also been told I’m “elegant” and that they want to take me to a gala.

I don’t know what that says about me.

Please help! Any guidance would be amazing!

Just one data point. I meet your criteria. Been very focused on my career, so single, no drama, no baggage, aged 39. I date 25 to 32, no exceptions, because biology is a fact of life. Sorry to bear the news, but a few similarly situated male friends have the same rule. And all my other friends are married with kids. Good luck, though.

Why is a 39 year old single guy hanging out on DCUM? I call bs.

There is no way I would have dated a 39 year old when I was that young. I wouldn't have dated a 39 year old till I was at least 34. I remember going on a date with a 39 year old when I was 31 and feeling like he was way too old.

Who cares what you would do. There are plenty of women with different approaches so men don' t have to worry about someone like you at all. I am mid-40s and find it extremely easy to date and sleep with attractive women in their 20s.

[Anonymous]

Have you considered being hotter and younger? I hear that works very well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

With all those great qualities, most women will look past height. I certainly would. He's a catch!

If OP wants someone to look past her age, she's going to have to make compromises too.

Height isn't a big deal - it's really not much of a compromise. Almost all of my friends wouldn't care, even my 5'9 friend. Someone who is extremely intelligent, high EQ, rich, honest, high integrity, fit, active, and single is a catch for any woman, period.

Right so someone in OPs position isn't going to find it all, and compromises will be made. Most likely he will be divorced, have a few kids of his own, some baggage, and maybe a vasectomy that needs to be reversed.

Absolutely not. Step sibling relationships are usually horrible. Step parenting usually sucks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

With all those great qualities, most women will look past height. I certainly would. He's a catch!

If OP wants someone to look past her age, she's going to have to make compromises too.

Height isn't a big deal - it's really not much of a compromise. Almost all of my friends wouldn't care, even my 5'9 friend. Someone who is extremely intelligent, high EQ, rich, honest, high integrity, fit, active, and single is a catch for any woman, period.

Right so someone in OPs position isn't going to find it all, and compromises will be made. Most likely he will be divorced, have a few kids of his own, some baggage, and maybe a vasectomy that needs to be reversed.

Absolutely not. Step sibling relationships are usually horrible. Step parenting usually sucks.

Not necessarily. My step mom and my step sister and I made some videos together that have done quite well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

With all those great qualities, most women will look past height. I certainly would. He's a catch!

If OP wants someone to look past her age, she's going to have to make compromises too.

Height isn't a big deal - it's really not much of a compromise. Almost all of my friends wouldn't care, even my 5'9 friend. Someone who is extremely intelligent, high EQ, rich, honest, high integrity, fit, active, and single is a catch for any woman, period.

Right so someone in OPs position isn't going to find it all, and compromises will be made. Most likely he will be divorced, have a few kids of his own, some baggage, and maybe a vasectomy that needs to be reversed.

Absolutely not. Step sibling relationships are usually horrible. Step parenting usually sucks.

Not necessarily. My step mom and my step sister and I made some videos together that have done quite well.

They do 99% of the time.

[Anonymous]

OP, it's all about hats. Hats, Hats, Hats. Fun hats, practical hats, sexy hats, vintage hats, borrowed hats. Old hats, new hats. Just get a hat on your head.