Dating Strategy: Late Thirties Female

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Every woman wants a man who makes $200k+. I wonder how common such men are and whether women compete for them. Women on this forum have told us they don't compete for men. But these $200k men are not common.

And every man wants a Miss America. Somehow plenty of people still live happy lives and are happy with who they ended up with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Sounds like you're doing great then. Why do you need any advice?

Op here. Because I haven’t found my person yet and want to optimize my chances of doing that.

Lower your standards or stay single. No man in his prime years with good money is going to rush to marry a 35+ woman while so many women between 25 and 30 are available.

Look for men over 55 you may have better luck.

Gross. So she can be a caretaker for an old man and a toddler at the same time? Unless he's Jeff Bezos rich, no.

There are so many scenarios presented here that are worse than just staying single and getting a sperm donor for IVF. T

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In DC, I think you should look for 150k or higher. A lot of government jobs top out around 176k

Op here. I only have the income requirement because this is a very HCOL area and I’m targeting men 36+ given my age. At this point it’s not crazy to want someone to make a little more money than me. Given the track I’m on, I’ll easily make 200k myself in a few years.

As for why I’m here: I am recently divorced due to a cheating spouse who did not want kids.

OMFG, OP, you post here literally once a week asking the exact effing question. You’ve listed dozens of times. I call you out every time because it’s so, so sad. You don’t need a man and a child. You won’t be able to handle it. Trust me, having a child will be way too hard for you because you’re not stable enough to parent. You’re too insecure and needy. You need help. Please get help.

[Anonymous]

The desperation is palpable. It's never going to work out since it's an automatic turnoff. Men aren't under the same pressure and if they were they'd pick someone younger less likely to have issues.

[Anonymous]

Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

Gross.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

With all those great qualities, most women will look past height. I certainly would. He's a catch!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

With all those great qualities, most women will look past height. I certainly would. He's a catch!

If OP wants someone to look past her age, she's going to have to make compromises too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

With all those great qualities, most women will look past height. I certainly would. He's a catch!

If OP wants someone to look past her age, she's going to have to make compromises too.

Height isn't a big deal - it's really not much of a compromise. Almost all of my friends wouldn't care, even my 5'9 friend. Someone who is extremely intelligent, high EQ, rich, honest, high integrity, fit, active, and single is a catch for any woman, period.

[Anonymous]

Op what race are you, how tall are you, what’s your eye color?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Continuing: so far the men I’ve met on the apps meet the income criteria or come close:

- one made 230k
- one made 170k
- one made 200k

So it’s like not impossible but more about timing and chemistry and alignment.

How do you know their salaries?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

With all those great qualities, most women will look past height. I certainly would. He's a catch!

If OP wants someone to look past her age, she's going to have to make compromises too.

Height isn't a big deal - it's really not much of a compromise. Almost all of my friends wouldn't care, even my 5'9 friend. Someone who is extremely intelligent, high EQ, rich, honest, high integrity, fit, active, and single is a catch for any woman, period.

Right so someone in OPs position isn't going to find it all, and compromises will be made. Most likely he will be divorced, have a few kids of his own, some baggage, and maybe a vasectomy that needs to be reversed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

With all those great qualities, most women will look past height. I certainly would. He's a catch!

If OP wants someone to look past her age, she's going to have to make compromises too.

Height isn't a big deal - it's really not much of a compromise. Almost all of my friends wouldn't care, even my 5'9 friend. Someone who is extremely intelligent, high EQ, rich, honest, high integrity, fit, active, and single is a catch for any woman, period.

Right so someone in OPs position isn't going to find it all, and compromises will be made. Most likely he will be divorced, have a few kids of his own, some baggage, and maybe a vasectomy that needs to be reversed.

Well...if he doesn't have baggage yet, he'll have it as soon as he's dating OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interested to how this measures up to your wants:

38
Never married
Homes in US and Europe so he's always back and forth
Extremely intelligent - genuinely just someone so interested to talk to
Equally high EQ
Unsure about kids
5'8ish
Way more than $200k
Honesty, integrity
Fit, active

With all those great qualities, most women will look past height. I certainly would. He's a catch!

If OP wants someone to look past her age, she's going to have to make compromises too.

Height isn't a big deal - it's really not much of a compromise. Almost all of my friends wouldn't care, even my 5'9 friend. Someone who is extremely intelligent, high EQ, rich, honest, high integrity, fit, active, and single is a catch for any woman, period.

Right so someone in OPs position isn't going to find it all, and compromises will be made. Most likely he will be divorced, have a few kids of his own, some baggage, and maybe a vasectomy that needs to be reversed.

Uh, no, that has already been addressed above. A divorced man with a few kids is a liability. OP is better off single. Compromise on something like height, sure. But a divorced man with kids and a vasectomy? In no world should OP even accept a message from such a man.

[Anonymous]

Another one here voting for just be a mom if you want to be a mom. Find a donor and do IUI. Budget $80,000 a year for at least 5 years for a phenomenal nanny. In a few years once your kid(s) are old enough not to be so all-consuming, you can look for a partner if you still want one. But right now you are shopping for a whole package on a tight deadline and it is going to cloud your judgement. At minimum freeze your eggs (I would freeze some eggs and some embryos created with donor sperm) so you are taking the pressure off.