My mom is upset over Thanksgiving plans

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Dad come for dinner - No
Dad meet Grandbaby - Yes

Figure something out. Retract any invitation -he thinks- he has. No one gets to "invite" themselves. Grow a spine and deal with it.

He didn't invite himself, he suggested coming over for Thanksgiving and OP agreed to it. This entire conflict is solely because OPs mom is just a big woman-baby

[Anonymous]

I would see dad some other time over the holiday and spend Thanksgiving with Mom alone, because it's her birthday.

It would have been better to keep Thanksgiving at your mom's as usual and not host with a baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would see dad some other time over the holiday and spend Thanksgiving with Mom alone, because it's her birthday.

It would have been better to keep Thanksgiving at your mom's as usual and not host with a baby.

This catering to the moms whims would simply encourage the mom to continue the pattern of emotional manipulation. Mom needs to get over it. They've been divorced for several years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would see dad some other time over the holiday and spend Thanksgiving with Mom alone, because it's her birthday.

It would have been better to keep Thanksgiving at your mom's as usual and not host with a baby.

This catering to the moms whims would simply encourage the mom to continue the pattern of emotional manipulation. Mom needs to get over it. They've been divorced for several years.

There are some things you never really get over.

[Anonymous]

Keep plans with your mom. See your dad the next day, or the day before. Make sure your mom isn't home when your dad comes over.

[Anonymous]

When you make plans with someone, you don't suddenly do a bait and switch and invite someone you know they can't get along with. Especially when that person gave you no notice of their travel plans and simply informed you they would be there on a national holiday. Dump dad, tell him you'll see him on Friday. Having a baby doesn't mean you get to through all reason and common sense out the window.

[Anonymous]

Your dad is very wrong and it is obvious to anyone not emotionally close to this.
Team Mom and my DH agrees. No way I would change plans when Dad is treating you like an afterthought

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When you make plans with someone, you don't suddenly do a bait and switch and invite someone you know they can't get along with. Especially when that person gave you no notice of their travel plans and simply informed you they would be there on a national holiday. Dump dad, tell him you'll see him on Friday. Having a baby doesn't mean you get to through all reason and common sense out the window.

+1. Well said.

[Anonymous]

OP didn't ask for permission to invite her father.or approval. It's perfectly fine to invite ones parent and current partner for a holiday.

She title her thread mom is upset.

Op, it's ok to let your mom be upset.

She's an adult. She will get over it. Cut the apron strings already

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP didn't ask for permission to invite her father.or approval. It's perfectly fine to invite ones parent and current partner for a holiday.

She title her thread mom is upset.

Op, it's ok to let your mom be upset.

She's an adult. She will get over it. Cut the apron strings already

OP also didn't plan to invite her dad. He said he would be there for Thanksgiving. That obliged her to invite him to dinner. It's the height of rudeness. Some of you apparently were raised in barns. The right thing to do is tell dad sorry you have plans but can see you at another time. It's not ok to just let mom be upset about your dick moves. What's wrong with you?

[Anonymous]

If your dad is in town on Friday, meet him them. Or tell him that you already planned Thanksgiving dinner but could they come in the morning? Normally I'd say can't everyone just be adults, but you invited your mom for Thanksgiving and her birthday and now you are trying to include her least favorite person on the day. I'm a little bit team Mom here. Plus, I wouldn't want to deal with the tension during Thanksgiving dinner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Team "why can't the parents suck it up for one meal"

[phone]

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would see dad some other time over the holiday and spend Thanksgiving with Mom alone, because it's her birthday.

It would have been better to keep Thanksgiving at your mom's as usual and not host with a baby.

This. OP are you insane to want to host with a newborn?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would see dad some other time over the holiday and spend Thanksgiving with Mom alone, because it's her birthday.

It would have been better to keep Thanksgiving at your mom's as usual and not host with a baby.

This catering to the moms whims would simply encourage the mom to continue the pattern of emotional manipulation. Mom needs to get over it. They've been divorced for several years.

And divorce means you're no longer family and don't spend holidays together. They might bump into each other at unavoidable events like graduations, but you don't invite ex-spouses to holidays together unless you know for a fact they're both comfortable with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP didn't ask for permission to invite her father.or approval. It's perfectly fine to invite ones parent and current partner for a holiday.

She title her thread mom is upset.

Op, it's ok to let your mom be upset.

She's an adult. She will get over it. Cut the apron strings already

OP also didn't plan to invite her dad. He said he would be there for Thanksgiving. That obliged her to invite him to dinner. It's the height of rudeness. Some of you apparently were raised in barns. The right thing to do is tell dad sorry you have plans but can see you at another time. It's not ok to just let mom be upset about your dick moves. What's wrong with you?

OP wasn't obliged to do anything. She didn't complain about her father. She complained about her mom's emotional blackmail. Learn to read. The worst thing to do in response to emotional blackmail is to give in to it. Her mom doesn't get Thanksgiving priority because she is willing to use blackmail. She can stay home.