Difficulty making friends with women

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I don't think I'm a special snowflake or somehow better than others. I desperately want to have a nice group of close girlfriends. I jus have never been able to accumulate female friends because I guess on some level I feel like I don't have anything to offer other women. I'm not very social and I'm not very cool. Why would they want to befriend me? So I guess I'm always guarded and come across as snobby or off putting.

Okay, but why is it that you think you have something to offer guys then?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:With all due respect and in an attempt to answer honestly, a woman who claims she has a problem with other women is always the problem. Your problem is either that you choose friends poorly or that you don't treat friends well, or a combination of the two. To make and keep good friends, you have to be a good friend.

+1000

Couldn't agree more.

Yep.

[Anonymous]

I think you're my boring neighbor who always wants attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I don't think I'm a special snowflake or somehow better than others. I desperately want to have a nice group of close girlfriends. I jus have never been able to accumulate female friends because I guess on some level I feel like I don't have anything to offer other women. I'm not very social and I'm not very cool. Why would they want to befriend me? So I guess I'm always guarded and come across as snobby or off putting.

If you're not very social and not very cool, then how are you getting along with men? That doesn't make a lot of sense.

You are apparently social with men and "cool" enough to make small talk and interact with men.

It comes across as an excuse. What makes you think it's exclusive to women that you have to be social and cool?

[Anonymous]

I also only have superficial /acquaintance types of friendships with women. I have always had a horrible relationship with my mother. I accept it for what it is and I don't try to have a female "best friend" because I know that won't happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also only have superficial /acquaintance types of friendships with women. I have always had a horrible relationship with my mother. I accept it for what it is and I don't try to have a female "best friend" because I know that won't happen.

Because you won't allow it to.
Again the issues aren't other women, but you own issues.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I don't think I'm a special snowflake or somehow better than others. I desperately want to have a nice group of close girlfriends. I jus have never been able to accumulate female friends because I guess on some level I feel like I don't have anything to offer other women. I'm not very social and I'm not very cool. Why would they want to befriend me? So I guess I'm always guarded and come across as snobby or off putting.

If you're not very social and not very cool, then how are you getting along with men? That doesn't make a lot of sense.

You are apparently social with men and "cool" enough to make small talk and interact with men.

It comes across as an excuse. What makes you think it's exclusive to women that you have to be social and cool?

Yes. Lots of socially awkward, shy, and uncool women have friends with other women. I'm proof of this.
I'm trying to understand, OP, but I'm having a hard time getting where you are coming from.

[Anonymous]

I am more comfortable with men. Why? I don't like to spend time talking about trivial things. Things like that bond women and I'm more interested in talking about work, world affairs, financial topics, football...

I do have a handful of girlfriends, but we talk about the 2016 election while getting pedis.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I also only have superficial /acquaintance types of friendships with women. I have always had a horrible relationship with my mother. I accept it for what it is and I don't try to have a female "best friend" because I know that won't happen.

This is me now that I'm older. I don't bother truly trying to become friends. If it happens, it happens. If not, no sweat off my back.

It's not that I hate women or anything (my 2 best friends are women) but most that I've known throughout my life are very controlling and if you go against them, they'll make your life hell. It's either their way or no way. On the flip side, I've met women who claim they "only" have guy friends and most of the time, it's because they enjoy being the center of attention.

[Anonymous]

OP and her "eloquent" defender(s) (what adult woman calls another "bitch"?) strongly remind me Samantha Brick from the Daily Mail. For those of you who don't remember her, she's the one who wrote "waaah all women hate me because I'm beautiful!"

And then of course she was oblivious to the fact that 1) she isn't very beautiful and 2) she is an intolerable personality.

[Anonymous]

Oh and I wanted to add, some women don't like when another woman tries befriending their friend. Many women don't like "friendship stealers".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am more comfortable with men. Why? I don't like to spend time talking about trivial things. Things like that bond women and I'm more interested in talking about work, world affairs, financial topics, football...

I do have a handful of girlfriends, but we talk about the 2016 election while getting pedis.

Oh dear god. You are reducing women to being interested only in trivial things?

I have a large group of female friends and talk about politics, education, history or science with each and every one of them.

[Anonymous]

Wait, football isn't trivial?

If you are extremely uncomfortable with either gender, I strongly suggest therapy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am more comfortable with men. Why? I don't like to spend time talking about trivial things. Things like that bond women and I'm more interested in talking about work, world affairs, financial topics, football...

What exactly do you consider trivial? I'm a woman and my female friends and I discuss what you just wrote also.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am more comfortable with men. Why? I don't like to spend time talking about trivial things. Things like that bond women and I'm more interested in talking about work, world affairs, financial topics, football...

I do have a handful of girlfriends, but we talk about the 2016 election while getting pedis.

you are definitely my boring neighbor who constantly seeks attention.

And here you are getting it.