So tired of MIL acting like she’s the hostess in my home

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OPEN KITCHEN.

God almighty, you people cannot read.

Exactly. So mil was helping herself and others who were hungry. Because the kitchen was open.

Oh, dear. You’re very slow.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:[vimeo]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OP has also said several times she has an OPEN KITCHEN POLICY.

Everyone is welcome to help themselves with the exception of MIL.

I’m going to type very slowly for you, in hopes that it will aid you in reading comprehension, since clearly that is an area of struggle for you.

No, you are incorrect.
MIL may get HERSELF food from the open kitchen.
She may not be a ridiculous, insufferable, attention seeking person who loudly takes over and pretends to be the hostess, while “serving” food and wine to other guests which is already planned for its use at another time.
She also may not tell OP that food and drinks exist, and that OP can have them, which OP bought and prepared.

Do you get it now?

No because its polite to offer things to others if you are going to the kitchen and are up already. Jesus, the manners are appalling here. If OP was on the ball she would have already done it.

That’s not what happened and you know it, but since you’ll continue to double down on your nonsense, I won’t waste any more keystrokes on you.

Now he predictable and say something like “Thank God! Lol!”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[vimeo]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OP has also said several times she has an OPEN KITCHEN POLICY.

Everyone is welcome to help themselves with the exception of MIL.

I’m going to type very slowly for you, in hopes that it will aid you in reading comprehension, since clearly that is an area of struggle for you.

No, you are incorrect.
MIL may get HERSELF food from the open kitchen.
She may not be a ridiculous, insufferable, attention seeking person who loudly takes over and pretends to be the hostess, while “serving” food and wine to other guests which is already planned for its use at another time.
She also may not tell OP that food and drinks exist, and that OP can have them, which OP bought and prepared.

Do you get it now?

No because its polite to offer things to others if you are going to the kitchen and are up already. Jesus, the manners are appalling here. If OP was on the ball she would have already done it.

That’s not what happened and you know it, but since you’ll continue to double down on your nonsense, I won’t waste any more keystrokes on you.

Now he predictable and say something like “Thank God! Lol!”

.

We have wildly different interpretations of what happened based on limited info. Im happy to err on the side of feeding people and being hospitable is never wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OP has also said several times she has an OPEN KITCHEN POLICY.

Everyone is welcome to help themselves with the exception of MIL.

I’m going to type very slowly for you, in hopes that it will aid you in reading comprehension, since clearly that is an area of struggle for you.

No, you are incorrect.
MIL may get HERSELF food from the open kitchen.
She may not be a ridiculous, insufferable, attention seeking person who loudly takes over and pretends to be the hostess, while “serving” food and wine to other guests which is already planned for its use at another time.
She also may not tell OP that food and drinks exist, and that OP can have them, which OP bought and prepared.

Do you get it now?

Lol - rule 4 of the “open” kitchen - “she may not tell op that food and drinks exist.”

Thanks for speaking slowly so the grand openness of the kitchen and the very rational nature of the several associated rules and regulations are not lost on us layfolk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[vimeo]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OP has also said several times she has an OPEN KITCHEN POLICY.

Everyone is welcome to help themselves with the exception of MIL.

I’m going to type very slowly for you, in hopes that it will aid you in reading comprehension, since clearly that is an area of struggle for you.

No, you are incorrect.
MIL may get HERSELF food from the open kitchen.
She may not be a ridiculous, insufferable, attention seeking person who loudly takes over and pretends to be the hostess, while “serving” food and wine to other guests which is already planned for its use at another time.
She also may not tell OP that food and drinks exist, and that OP can have them, which OP bought and prepared.

Do you get it now?

No because its polite to offer things to others if you are going to the kitchen and are up already. Jesus, the manners are appalling here. If OP was on the ball she would have already done it.

That’s not what happened and you know it, but since you’ll continue to double down on your nonsense, I won’t waste any more keystrokes on you.

Now he predictable and say something like “Thank God! Lol!”

.

We have wildly different interpretations of what happened based on limited info. Im happy to err on the side of feeding people and being hospitable is never wrong.

I don't believe you ever host people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What was she like as a hostess in her own home when she hosted big holidays? Did she enjoy it? Is she an anxious person?

She claims to love it all, but doesn’t plan properly and always acts surprised by things like the fact that you actually need to set the Thanksgiving table, not just prepare food. She declines all offers for help and acts like I’m crazy for offering to set the table ahead of time. Then when everything is finally served after she, you know, finds everything and sets the table, she grumbles that it’s cold. Her food is fine, she’s just not good at planning or accepting help. Maybe it annoys her that DH and I actually think things through and have a lot down so it’s always taken care of and fairly easy to pull off.

Or maybe she is trying to help but is not very good at helping but is trying anyway because she thinks it’s polite.

+1 It sounds to me like she hasn’t quite figured out how to be the matriarch in your home, or just doesn’t really know what her role is or how to help. I see it as an awkward effort to not feel useless.

Just to add - I think I would feel compassion for her rather than irritation.

+1. My MIL does this too. I think it's just ingrained and she's trying to be polite/feel useful and it comes out in this weird way. I find it mildly annoying/amusing when she asks me if she can get me something IN MY OWN HOME. I just say breezily, "oh no, you go sit down, what can I get for YOU?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OPEN KITCHEN.

God almighty, you people cannot read.

Exactly. So mil was helping herself and others who were hungry. Because the kitchen was open.

NP. How do you know “others were hungry”? My sister has a crazy MIL who tries to do things like this and is always bustling about and extremely nosy. If she was doing that kind of crap in my sister’s kitchen, I would probably accept a glass of water but try to re-direct her away from setting out what I knew was the sangria my sister made for a holiday party. Some people just cannot relax and are constantly making their anxiety someone else’s problem. It’s annoying.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OPEN KITCHEN.

God almighty, you people cannot read.

Exactly. So mil was helping herself and others who were hungry. Because the kitchen was open.

You are a terrible houseguest, and it shows. Normal people know that an open kitchen means help yourself to a snack, but do not break into the items that hosts have made or bought for specific meals or for appetizers during happy hour. What, you’d put an individual Beef Wellington into the oven for yourself for lunch on Christmas Day, even though the hosts had made it for Christmas Dinner? After all, the kitchen was open and you were hungry? You’d pop a champagne that was being chilled for New Year’s Eve to make yourself a mimosa two days before?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[vimeo]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OP has also said several times she has an OPEN KITCHEN POLICY.

Everyone is welcome to help themselves with the exception of MIL.

I’m going to type very slowly for you, in hopes that it will aid you in reading comprehension, since clearly that is an area of struggle for you.

No, you are incorrect.
MIL may get HERSELF food from the open kitchen.
She may not be a ridiculous, insufferable, attention seeking person who loudly takes over and pretends to be the hostess, while “serving” food and wine to other guests which is already planned for its use at another time.
She also may not tell OP that food and drinks exist, and that OP can have them, which OP bought and prepared.

Do you get it now?

No because its polite to offer things to others if you are going to the kitchen and are up already. Jesus, the manners are appalling here. If OP was on the ball she would have already done it.

That’s not what happened and you know it, but since you’ll continue to double down on your nonsense, I won’t waste any more keystrokes on you.

Now he predictable and say something like “Thank God! Lol!”

.

We have wildly different interpretations of what happened based on limited info. Im happy to err on the side of feeding people and being hospitable is never wrong.

NP. “Hospitable” is offering three meals and one cocktail hour a day, and making sure people know they are welcome to go get cheese and crackers or a sandwich or some fruit or chips if they are hungry between meals. OP has done that: check.

Being a good GUEST means—when you are helping yourself in the kitchen—avoiding the specialty items that have been clearly made or purchased to be served during meal times or cocktail hour. Would you really open your hosts’ NYE caviar the day before at a random time when you wanted a snack? Really? Would you cut out a portion of the lasagna for that night’s dinner and nuke it for yourself at 3 p.m.? Really?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[vimeo]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OP has also said several times she has an OPEN KITCHEN POLICY.

Everyone is welcome to help themselves with the exception of MIL.

I’m going to type very slowly for you, in hopes that it will aid you in reading comprehension, since clearly that is an area of struggle for you.

No, you are incorrect.
MIL may get HERSELF food from the open kitchen.
She may not be a ridiculous, insufferable, attention seeking person who loudly takes over and pretends to be the hostess, while “serving” food and wine to other guests which is already planned for its use at another time.
She also may not tell OP that food and drinks exist, and that OP can have them, which OP bought and prepared.

Do you get it now?

No because its polite to offer things to others if you are going to the kitchen and are up already. Jesus, the manners are appalling here. If OP was on the ball she would have already done it.

That’s not what happened and you know it, but since you’ll continue to double down on your nonsense, I won’t waste any more keystrokes on you.

Now he predictable and say something like “Thank God! Lol!”

.

We have wildly different interpretations of what happened based on limited info. Im happy to err on the side of feeding people and being hospitable is never wrong.

NP. “Hospitable” is offering three meals and one cocktail hour a day, and making sure people know they are welcome to go get cheese and crackers or a sandwich or some fruit or chips if they are hungry between meals. OP has done that: check.

Being a good GUEST means—when you are helping yourself in the kitchen—avoiding the specialty items that have been clearly made or purchased to be served during meal times or cocktail hour. Would you really open your hosts’ NYE caviar the day before at a random time when you wanted a snack? Really? Would you cut out a portion of the lasagna for that night’s dinner and nuke it for yourself at 3 p.m.? Really?

Don’t host people if you begrudge them snacks in your “open” kitchen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OPEN KITCHEN.

God almighty, you people cannot read.

Exactly. So mil was helping herself and others who were hungry. Because the kitchen was open.

NP. How do you know “others were hungry”? My sister has a crazy MIL who tries to do things like this and is always bustling about and extremely nosy. If she was doing that kind of crap in my sister’s kitchen, I would probably accept a glass of water but try to re-direct her away from setting out what I knew was the sangria my sister made for a holiday party. Some people just cannot relax and are constantly making their anxiety someone else’s problem. It’s annoying.

OP didn’t say they weren’t. She’s just mad mil embarrassed her and her poor hosting skills.

[Anonymous]

OP it would bug me too. It's weird and inappropriate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:[vimeo]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OP has also said several times she has an OPEN KITCHEN POLICY.

Everyone is welcome to help themselves with the exception of MIL.

I’m going to type very slowly for you, in hopes that it will aid you in reading comprehension, since clearly that is an area of struggle for you.

No, you are incorrect.
MIL may get HERSELF food from the open kitchen.
She may not be a ridiculous, insufferable, attention seeking person who loudly takes over and pretends to be the hostess, while “serving” food and wine to other guests which is already planned for its use at another time.
She also may not tell OP that food and drinks exist, and that OP can have them, which OP bought and prepared.

Do you get it now?

No because its polite to offer things to others if you are going to the kitchen and are up already. Jesus, the manners are appalling here. If OP was on the ball she would have already done it.

That’s not what happened and you know it, but since you’ll continue to double down on your nonsense, I won’t waste any more keystrokes on you.

Now he predictable and say something like “Thank God! Lol!”

.

We have wildly different interpretations of what happened based on limited info. Im happy to err on the side of feeding people and being hospitable is never wrong.

NP. “Hospitable” is offering three meals and one cocktail hour a day, and making sure people know they are welcome to go get cheese and crackers or a sandwich or some fruit or chips if they are hungry between meals. OP has done that: check.

Being a good GUEST means—when you are helping yourself in the kitchen—avoiding the specialty items that have been clearly made or purchased to be served during meal times or cocktail hour. Would you really open your hosts’ NYE caviar the day before at a random time when you wanted a snack? Really? Would you cut out a portion of the lasagna for that night’s dinner and nuke it for yourself at 3 p.m.? Really?

Don’t host people if you begrudge them snacks in your “open” kitchen.

I haven't posted in this thread yet, but I wanted to say it's really interesting and telling that you won't answer the bolded questions. Do you understand the difference between making yourself a sandwich or some cheese and fruit, and taking a portion of the lasagna that your hosts planned to serve that night for dinner and heating it up for yourself as a snack at 3 p.m.? You seem unable to answer this question. Why is that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OPEN KITCHEN.

God almighty, you people cannot read.

Exactly. So mil was helping herself and others who were hungry. Because the kitchen was open.

NP. How do you know “others were hungry”? My sister has a crazy MIL who tries to do things like this and is always bustling about and extremely nosy. If she was doing that kind of crap in my sister’s kitchen, I would probably accept a glass of water but try to re-direct her away from setting out what I knew was the sangria my sister made for a holiday party. Some people just cannot relax and are constantly making their anxiety someone else’s problem. It’s annoying.

OP didn’t say they weren’t. She’s just mad mil embarrassed her and her poor hosting skills.

NP and it is not "poor hosting skills" to provide open access to your kitchen, but to have a few items earmarked for specific times, like dinner food or like shrimp or artichoke dip for cocktail hour. And yes lots of people pick out specific wines to pair with dinners, especially holiday dinners.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you are a bad host. You obviously refuse to take responsibility as to why your MIL feels compelled to offer guests food. BECAUSE THEY ARE STARVING!!!!!!!!!!!@

You really need to take some medication. No one is starving at 3pm and requires wine and snacks. But go on with your crazy self. It’s amusing.

You're gaslighting. This hostess needs the meds for her severe OCD and rigid meal restrictions.

I’m gaslighting someone who posted in all caps that at 3pm, people are starving followed by 10 exclamation marks when none of that was true? Really? Yeah, no. Please enlighten us to the post where OP has rigid meal restrictions and where she says no one can eat outside of the regular meal times. What page and time stamp?

Un read the OP its right there. Not at 3. Only at 5 when the host will serve those things.

OPEN KITCHEN.

God almighty, you people cannot read.

Exactly. So mil was helping herself and others who were hungry. Because the kitchen was open.

NP. How do you know “others were hungry”? My sister has a crazy MIL who tries to do things like this and is always bustling about and extremely nosy. If she was doing that kind of crap in my sister’s kitchen, I would probably accept a glass of water but try to re-direct her away from setting out what I knew was the sangria my sister made for a holiday party. Some people just cannot relax and are constantly making their anxiety someone else’s problem. It’s annoying.

OP didn’t say they weren’t. She’s just mad mil embarrassed her and her poor hosting skills.

NP and it is not "poor hosting skills" to provide open access to your kitchen, but to have a few items earmarked for specific times, like dinner food or like shrimp or artichoke dip for cocktail hour. And yes lots of people pick out specific wines to pair with dinners, especially holiday dinners.

Can you quote where dinner and ear marked things were served other than wine? OP was mad people ate at 3 and not at 5 because she was totally inflexible.