This. No wonder OP’s husband won’t stay up for the baby. She’s doing this to herself. Maybe she’s a troll. |
Because he has a job to go to and OP and does not. OP can sleep during the day when the baby naps. |
1-2 hour day time naps ( that's the max she can get if baby is up every 2-3 hours) cannot even begin to compare to a 4 hour stretch of sleep. He should take a nap during his lunch break when he is working from home and give her a 4 hour stretch at night. |
She can get a four hour stretch if she goes to bed earlier and he takes the 10 pm shift. That to me is the obvious compromise here. But if he isn’t willing, she either sucks it up or hires someone. There’s really no other options. |
He does note want to, and they are both too dumb ( or too sleep deprived) to realize that they need to hire someone if he cannot do the 10 pm feeding. |
And millions of us had support during our postpartum period. Why do you want some kind of medal for making bad choices? |
Your story keeps changing. First he did half, now he did “everything”. You need to clean up all day but he does all the cooking and cleaning…somehow not enough for a breakfast or lunch the next day. You’re writing this from the past where grocery shopping is a chore and not something everyone does online and has delivered. I’m going to agree with the people saying troll. |
This is such a stupid post that I cannot imagine you intended for it to be taken seriously. |
Ok, stop complaining. You have it relatively easy. Wake up and feed the baby. |
Both of these comments are spot on. I can’t believe you think its acceptable for a parent of a newborn to expect to get a full night sleep and THEN work out. Every day. Your expectations of a good partner are sub par. I made myself a martyr and took all of it on with my newborn and that dynamic only worsened as DD got older. And therefore…I’m one and done. |
This. |
Nope. How is it crazy and overly dramatic to expect a father to parent? No one is talking about him taking time off or be in charge of nightime feedings. I am talking about him accepting that his life has changed and stepping up to parent. That means he does not get to sleep uninterrupted every night from 10 -6. That means he does not get to treat himself to a workout every morning. He helps out by taking a 10 feeding and then the morning feed instead of his workout. If he can work out while pushing the baby in the stroller, then he can do that. And how is OP supposed to nap during the day? Who is taking care of the baby then? She feeds, pumps, cleans up. Maybe she would like to shower or use the bathroom. Perhaps eat. Then guess what, the baby is awake again. |
Once OP goes back to work, DH will have a set lifestyle expectation as a working parent. If he’s not pitching in somewhat now but still getting his routine sleep and me time, it seems unlikely he’s going to alter his ways when OP’s maternity leave ends. That is what I’d be really worried about. No one’s life and routines go back to what they were pre baby. Everyone has to adjust. |
Let me guess…you’re a SAHM? |
Ok this has to be fake. I was with you OP, your husband is a jerk and needs to take a night feeding. But while we are talking about compromises we will all make to survive this very difficult period.... you need to open your mind to some as well and this "we have to cook all our own healthy organic food" crap is absolutely on that list. |