Can you have a successful sexless marriage?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the rabid feminazi responses to the dude who "expects" sex in a relationship and stays unmarried to pursue that goal more easily. I have to assume sex is not important nor fun for that PP, such that she can't fathom it being a dealbreaker. I'm a feminist myself and have zero issue with what he's saying. In fact, as a newly divorced woman, I feel exactly the same way. If the sex dried up for no good reason, see ya. I don't need more platonic friends.

I've never met a true feminist who used this word. Nice try.

Well here I am. That word conjures up exactly the hysterical, crazed behavior of the poster well-being on twisting that guy's words, and I, as a feminist, hate how she gives feminists a bad name. SHE is responsible for the existence of the term feminazi, and her relentless assholery undermines feminism.

How can you twist the fact he says he expects sex no matter the excuse? And he is entitled to it. He walked it back after that but that was his first post out of the gate.

Because it's totally reasonable to expect regular sex, barring a good reason like illness (which he said), in a relationship. There's nothing controversial there, as much as you keep trying to twist his words.

Read the whole thread. That is absolutely 💯 not what he said at first. We drew that medical issues were acceptable excuses out of him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the rabid feminazi responses to the dude who "expects" sex in a relationship and stays unmarried to pursue that goal more easily. I have to assume sex is not important nor fun for that PP, such that she can't fathom it being a dealbreaker. I'm a feminist myself and have zero issue with what he's saying. In fact, as a newly divorced woman, I feel exactly the same way. If the sex dried up for no good reason, see ya. I don't need more platonic friends.

I've never met a true feminist who used this word. Nice try.

Well here I am. That word conjures up exactly the hysterical, crazed behavior of the poster well-being on twisting that guy's words, and I, as a feminist, hate how she gives feminists a bad name. SHE is responsible for the existence of the term feminazi, and her relentless assholery undermines feminism.

How can you twist the fact he says he expects sex no matter the excuse? And he is entitled to it. He walked it back after that but that was his first post out of the gate.

Because it's totally reasonable to expect regular sex, barring a good reason like illness (which he said), in a relationship. There's nothing controversial there, as much as you keep trying to twist his words.

Read the whole thread. That is absolutely 💯 not what he said at first. We drew that medical issues were acceptable excuses out of him.

Exactly. His first response was quite aggressive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the rabid feminazi responses to the dude who "expects" sex in a relationship and stays unmarried to pursue that goal more easily. I have to assume sex is not important nor fun for that PP, such that she can't fathom it being a dealbreaker. I'm a feminist myself and have zero issue with what he's
saying. In fact, as a newly divorced woman, I feel exactly the same way. If the sex dried up for no good reason, see ya. I don't need more platonic friends.

I've never met a true feminist who used this word. Nice try.

+100.

Duhhh. Of course a feminist isn't going to use this word. It's a word that was coined by Rush Limbaugh that is meant to be insulting to feminists.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not really focused on the merit of the rest of PP's statements, but "The world isn't changing as much as you think" is actually pretty profound and, I think, true in a lot of contexts and for a lot of people, left and right.

Yes, using silly new phrases like: Cis-genter-hetero-white-mail (throw privileged in there) is not progressive. It just makes a whole generation sound like a bunch of stupid twits.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the rabid feminazi responses to the dude who "expects" sex in a relationship and stays unmarried to pursue that goal more easily. I have to assume sex is not important nor fun for that PP, such that she can't fathom it being a dealbreaker. I'm a feminist myself and have zero issue with what he's saying. In fact, as a newly divorced woman, I feel exactly the same way. If the sex dried up for no good reason, see ya. I don't need more platonic friends.

Yeah, it really is pretty straight forward. The reason it triggers some women here is because it hits a nerve. These are women with delusional thoughts of their miserable husbands not being anything like me, a pretty average man with average thoughts. It's a waste of time to tell me that no woman owes me sex, or owes me anything when she really means, I don't owe my own husband anything. And surely, he has happily surrendered his sex life and has no thoughts of cheating or getting a divorce. Only rapey, misogynistic, abusive, coercive men are like that.

I think you're the one who is triggered. Definitely not the case for us as you mention and so don't paint all responders who disagree with you with the same brush. Reasonable people can disagree.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the rabid feminazi responses to the dude who "expects" sex in a relationship and stays unmarried to pursue that goal more easily. I have to assume sex is not important nor fun for that PP, such that she can't fathom it being a dealbreaker. I'm a feminist myself and have zero issue with what he's saying. In fact, as a newly divorced woman, I feel exactly the same way. If the sex dried up for no good reason, see ya. I don't need more platonic friends.

I've never met a true feminist who used this word. Nice try.

Well here I am. That word conjures up exactly the hysterical, crazed behavior of the poster well-being on twisting that guy's words, and I, as a feminist, hate how she gives feminists a bad name. SHE is responsible for the existence of the term feminazi, and her relentless assholery undermines feminism.

How can you twist the fact he says he expects sex no matter the excuse? And he is entitled to it. He walked it back after that but that was his first post out of the gate.

Never did I say I expect sex no matter the excuse. Never. Keeping you on track is like trying to herd a bunch of cats, but I still believe in you. Try to stay on topic and reply to what was written without making shit up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the rabid feminazi responses to the dude who "expects" sex in a relationship and stays unmarried to pursue that goal more easily. I have to assume sex is not important nor fun for that PP, such that she can't fathom it being a dealbreaker. I'm a feminist myself and have zero issue with what he's saying. In fact, as a newly divorced woman, I feel exactly the same way. If the sex dried up for no good reason, see ya. I don't need more platonic friends.

I've never met a true feminist who used this word. Nice try.

Well here I am. That word conjures up exactly the hysterical, crazed behavior of the poster well-being on twisting that guy's words, and I, as a feminist, hate how she gives feminists a bad name. SHE is responsible for the existence of the term feminazi, and her relentless assholery undermines feminism.

How can you twist the fact he says he expects sex no matter the excuse? And he is entitled to it. He walked it back after that but that was his first post out of the gate.

Because it's totally reasonable to expect regular sex, barring a good reason like illness (which he said), in a relationship. There's nothing controversial there, as much as you keep trying to twist his words.

Read the whole thread. That is absolutely 💯 not what he said at first. We drew that medical issues were acceptable excuses out of him.

Right. You did. Because in my first post, I didn't think it was necessary to write a whole chapter on all the reasons where it may be perfectly normal and acceptable to not want sex. But you insist on going way off topic to try to make my words fit your narrative. You haven't succeeded. The topic is is about, sexless marriages. Not: illness, cancer, war, death & dying, multiple orgasms, slavery, abuse, or rape... But you just keep swinging, hoping to get a hit. Give it up and go F your husband. You do still do that, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the rabid feminazi responses to the dude who "expects" sex in a relationship and stays unmarried to pursue that goal more easily. I have to assume sex is not important nor fun for that PP, such that she can't fathom it being a dealbreaker. I'm a feminist myself and have zero issue with what he's saying. In fact, as a newly divorced woman, I feel exactly the same way. If the sex dried up for no good reason, see ya. I don't need more platonic friends.

I've never met a true feminist who used this word. Nice try.

Well here I am. That word conjures up exactly the hysterical, crazed behavior of the poster well-being on twisting that guy's words, and I, as a feminist, hate how she gives feminists a bad name. SHE is responsible for the existence of the term feminazi, and her relentless assholery undermines feminism.

How can you twist the fact he says he expects sex no matter the excuse? And he is entitled to it. He walked it back after that but that was his first post out of the gate.

Because it's totally reasonable to expect regular sex, barring a good reason like illness (which he said), in a relationship. There's nothing controversial there, as much as you keep trying to twist his words.

Read the whole thread. That is absolutely 💯 not what he said at first. We drew that medical issues were acceptable excuses out of him.

Exactly. His first response was quite aggressive.

I'm still aggressive. Tough titties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the rabid feminazi responses to the dude who "expects" sex in a relationship and stays unmarried to pursue that goal more easily. I have to assume sex is not important nor fun for that PP, such that she can't fathom it being a dealbreaker. I'm a feminist myself and have zero issue with what he's saying. In fact, as a newly divorced woman, I feel exactly the same way. If the sex dried up for no good reason, see ya. I don't need more platonic friends.

Yeah, it really is pretty straight forward. The reason it triggers some women here is because it hits a nerve. These are women with delusional thoughts of their miserable husbands not being anything like me, a pretty average man with average thoughts. It's a waste of time to tell me that no woman owes me sex, or owes me anything when she really means, I don't owe my own husband anything. And surely, he has happily surrendered his sex life and has no thoughts of cheating or getting a divorce. Only rapey, misogynistic, abusive, coercive men are like that.

I think you're the one who is triggered. Definitely not the case for us as you mention and so don't paint all responders who disagree with you with the same brush. Reasonable people can disagree.

Oh, have the rules changed? Am I not allowed to make sweeping generalizations about the posters who attack me with the same? It's all pure speculation on my part, but I'd still put money on it being accurate. Why get so defensive about how a man thinks? I really am just an average man telling you how it is from one who is no longer married.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Being married does not mean being celibate. I feel it is quite unreasonable for either partner to downplay or ignore the emotional/sexual needs of the other. If you can’t it won’t fix it, you can divorce, open the marriage or cheat. In the latter case, it’s not fair to call the other person evil b/c they seek elsewhere the comfort you deny.

A comedian once said everything in life is about sex. Except sex, which is about power.

People who withhold sex and affection in a marriage are asserting a power over their spouse by denying the one thing their spouse needs and can't ethically get elsewhere. They know their spouse probably won't divorce over it if they have kids. That's part of the reason people have such rapid reactions to infidelity. It shifts the power to the denied spouse and forces the withholding spouse to choose between divorce and staying with a cheater.

Except those who regularly sleep with a spouse who cheats.

Will you please stop derailing SEXLESS MARRIAGE threads with your purple spotted unicorn 0.0000001% case of the husband who cheats despite sex 5X per week plus BJs on demand?

First time I posted that, and I believe it is more common than you think. I’ve known a few people in that situation.

No, it's not common. Start a new thread if you want to discuss that exceptionally rare topic. Your post has nothing to do with subject thread: sexless marriage.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the rabid feminazi responses to the dude who "expects" sex in a relationship and stays unmarried to pursue that goal more easily. I have to assume sex is not important nor fun for that PP, such that she can't fathom it being a dealbreaker. I'm a feminist myself and have zero issue with what he's saying. In fact, as a newly divorced woman, I feel exactly the same way. If the sex dried up for no good reason, see ya. I don't need more platonic friends.

I've never met a true feminist who used this word. Nice try.

Well here I am. That word conjures up exactly the hysterical, crazed behavior of the poster well-being on twisting that guy's words, and I, as a feminist, hate how she gives feminists a bad name. SHE is responsible for the existence of the term feminazi, and her relentless assholery undermines feminism.

How can you twist the fact he says he expects sex no matter the excuse? And he is entitled to it. He walked it back after that but that was his first post out of the gate.

Never did I say I expect sex no matter the excuse. Never. Keeping you on track is like trying to herd a bunch of cats, but I still believe in you. Try to stay on topic and reply to what was written without making shit up.

Sir. "I'll never have a GF that gets away with denying me sex, no matter her perceived good reasons." Direct cut and paste.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Being married does not mean being celibate. I feel it is quite unreasonable for either partner to downplay or ignore the emotional/sexual needs of the other. If you can’t it won’t fix it, you can divorce, open the marriage or cheat. In the latter case, it’s not fair to call the other person evil b/c they seek elsewhere the comfort you deny.

A comedian once said everything in life is about sex. Except sex, which is about power.

People who withhold sex and affection in a marriage are asserting a power over their spouse by denying the one thing their spouse needs and can't ethically get elsewhere. They know their spouse probably won't divorce over it if they have kids. That's part of the reason people have such rapid reactions to infidelity. It shifts the power to the denied spouse and forces the withholding spouse to choose between divorce and staying with a cheater.

Except those who regularly sleep with a spouse who cheats.

Will you please stop derailing SEXLESS MARRIAGE threads with your purple spotted unicorn 0.0000001% case of the husband who cheats despite sex 5X per week plus BJs on demand?

First time I posted that, and I believe it is more common than you think. I’ve known a few people in that situation.

No, it's not common. Start a new thread if you want to discuss that exceptionally rare topic. Your post has nothing to do with subject thread: sexless marriage.

I was responding to a blanket statement. But I’ll stop so you can crawl back under your rock and be by your lonesome.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Being married does not mean being celibate. I feel it is quite unreasonable for either partner to downplay or ignore the emotional/sexual needs of the other. If you can’t it won’t fix it, you can divorce, open the marriage or cheat. In the latter case, it’s not fair to call the other person evil b/c they seek elsewhere the comfort you deny.

A comedian once said everything in life is about sex. Except sex, which is about power.

People who withhold sex and affection in a marriage are asserting a power over their spouse by denying the one thing their spouse needs and can't ethically get elsewhere. They know their spouse probably won't divorce over it if they have kids. That's part of the reason people have such rapid reactions to infidelity. It shifts the power to the denied spouse and forces the withholding spouse to choose between divorce and staying with a cheater.

Except those who regularly sleep with a spouse who cheats.

Will you please stop derailing SEXLESS MARRIAGE threads with your purple spotted unicorn 0.0000001% case of the husband who cheats despite sex 5X per week plus BJs on demand?

First time I posted that, and I believe it is more common than you think. I’ve known a few people in that situation.

No, it's not common. Start a new thread if you want to discuss that exceptionally rare topic. Your post has nothing to do with subject thread: sexless marriage.

Spoken like a true incel. It’s a wonder you ever married in the first place.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand the rabid feminazi responses to the dude who "expects" sex in a relationship and stays unmarried to pursue that goal more easily. I have to assume sex is not important nor fun for that PP, such that she can't fathom it being a dealbreaker. I'm a feminist myself and have zero issue with what he's saying. In fact, as a newly divorced woman, I feel exactly the same way. If the sex dried up for no good reason, see ya. I don't need more platonic friends.

Yeah, it really is pretty straight forward. The reason it triggers some women here is because it hits a nerve. These are women with delusional thoughts of their miserable husbands not being anything like me, a pretty average man with average thoughts. It's a waste of time to tell me that no woman owes me sex, or owes me anything when she really means, I don't owe my own husband anything. And surely, he has happily surrendered his sex life and has no thoughts of cheating or getting a divorce. Only rapey, misogynistic, abusive, coercive men are like that.

I think you're the one who is triggered. Definitely not the case for us as you mention and so don't paint all responders who disagree with you with the same brush. Reasonable people can disagree.

Oh, have the rules changed? Am I not allowed to make sweeping generalizations about the posters who attack me with the same? It's all pure speculation on my part, but I'd still put money on it being accurate. Why get so defensive about how a man thinks? I really am just an average man telling you how it is from one who is no longer married.

It's not about our defensiveness as much as defensiveness on your part. You posted aggressively and your tone subsequently is still quite aggressive. Is this only way you feel better is by attacking others motives (we don't have sex with out spouses etc.). Don't impugn motives on me which aren't true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess. My spouse doesn’t care about sex anymore, but he’s on the spectrum and doesn’t care about it most normal things in life. Since his Dx, have admitted how bad he was at it anyhow, and the likely reasons why... plus I’m sick of taking the lead on everything in life. So that’s a mood killer dynamic.

Did you try doing more of the housework? How about a massage. He can’t just turn it on because you want some at the end of the day.

Lol, that cures mental disorders!? Who knew!

Well that’s the reply here when men say the wives are not up for it, why is it different now?