Son and DIL hate me

[Anonymous]

The reason I think this is a troll is because of the 6 month moratorium. Also, the confusion over whether or not she's really in touch with your shrink, or if you are accusing her of lying and spreading rumors. That actually makes you sound like you do have a significant personality disorder. What "people" is she telling about your disorder?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Did you discuss this before you gave them the gift?

I'm not anti MIL, but this seems like a huge boundaries issue. You should have discussed the trip with them beforehand. She probably now has 3 kids begging to go, but she doesn't yet have hotels, airfare or time to take off of work yet. Most of my friends tell their kids a week before a Disney trip so that the kids don't nag for too long beforehand.

I did discuss the present. I was paying for everything. They didn't realize I was coming along too.

(Sigh and slap forehead). How can they not realize it if you say: "I am paying for everyone to come WITH ME to Disney."?

Either your son knew all the time and couldn't persuade his wife to accept the situation, so she finally called you and let you have it;
Or, you didn't actually spell it out because you have boundary issues, as your DIL says.

In the future, when you are all reconciled, you will know not to pull this crap anymore.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your psychiatrist is talking to your DIL about your treatment/prognosis? That seems bizarre.

Of course no one can tell you if DIL is being a b or being reasonable because its all about context and history. Did you buy them tickets to something they need to purchase plane tickets to get to? Have you tried to insert yourself in vacations in the past and had them speak with you about it?

In isolation it sounds a bit like DIL is overreacting but its all about history in these situations

I don't even have a psychiatrist. I know for sure my DIL said it was my son's ex wife sent me a screenshot of where she had posted it to Facebook!

Why are you in contact with your son's ex wife?

Court order is my house is meeting place for the oldest child. My son and his ex have a child together. My grandson.

[Anonymous]

Op that's very ungrateful of them. I say that as someone who PAID to take my MIL to Harry Potter World.

However you should not have surprised them by tagging along I you didn't make that clear from the start.

I would back away slowly from this relationship. That's a huge gift. Give her a gift certificate to Amazon next time.

[Anonymous]

I think she's mainly upset that I continue to have a relationship with the ex. The ex is family and that is unfair. My friend thinks the Facebook post was set to where only ex DIL can see it because no one else sees it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Did you ask them first? If my MIL bought us vacation tickets without consulting us first I wouldn't like it either.

+1

[Anonymous]

HUGE overstep. I would, of course still talk to you--and wouldn't malign you to others. But if you sprung Disney on us with no discussion? We would NOT go, and we'd be having a serious discussion about boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think she's mainly upset that I continue to have a relationship with the ex. The ex is family and that is unfair. My friend thinks the Facebook post was set to where only ex DIL can see it because no one else sees it.

Sorry but the ex isn't family and I don't believe you should have a relationship with her. Picking up and dropping off from your house is fine, but anything more is too much. You need to be on your DIL's side.

[Anonymous]

Inserting yourself without discussing it first was a horrible move. I'd be pissed.

[Anonymous]

Not OP, but do most of you all not travel with your parents? We love taking vacations with my family (can't get DH's family to go anywhere). They help with the kids and we get date nights during our vacation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think she's mainly upset that I continue to have a relationship with the ex. The ex is family and that is unfair. My friend thinks the Facebook post was set to where only ex DIL can see it because no one else sees it.

That's not how facebook works.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think she's mainly upset that I continue to have a relationship with the ex. The ex is family and that is unfair. My friend thinks the Facebook post was set to where only ex DIL can see it because no one else sees it.

That's not how facebook works.

NP but yeah you can do that with facebook.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Your psychiatrist is talking to your DIL about your treatment/prognosis? That seems bizarre.

Of course no one can tell you if DIL is being a b or being reasonable because its all about context and history. Did you buy them tickets to something they need to purchase plane tickets to get to? Have you tried to insert yourself in vacations in the past and had them speak with you about it?

In isolation it sounds a bit like DIL is overreacting but its all about history in these situations

I don't even have a psychiatrist. I know for sure my DIL said it was my son's ex wife sent me a screenshot of where she had posted it to Facebook!

Why are you in contact with your son's ex wife?

+1 This family feels full of dysfunction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think she's mainly upset that I continue to have a relationship with the ex. The ex is family and that is unfair. My friend thinks the Facebook post was set to where only ex DIL can see it because no one else sees it.

That's not how facebook works.

Yeah, either current DIL posted it and deleted the post- but ex-DIL saw it and took a screenshot. OR ex-DIL created the image to cause trouble...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think she's mainly upset that I continue to have a relationship with the ex. The ex is family and that is unfair. My friend thinks the Facebook post was set to where only ex DIL can see it because no one else sees it.

That's not how facebook works.

what? It can work that way.