Delaying a divorce

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I was 23 when he fed me the crap, he was my second sexual partner and I was still studying at the university, not particular experienced with dating. His first wife remarried 1 year after their divorce, even faster than he married me. I don’t think he lied back then that they were separated and lived separate lives. After that, we had 15 years of committed and pretty happy relationship (10 first years of marriage included), and 5 more him hiding the affair. The affair partner is married herself, she’s 50 yo with 2 grown up kids, perfectly aware about him having a young child when she started sleeping with him for monetary gains. I don’t think it’s appropriate to compare the 2 situations.
He wasn’t wealthy when I met him.

Of course you don't. But the fact remains, you were the first whore splashing in the first wife's pool and using the closets in her house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I was 23 when he fed me the crap, he was my second sexual partner and I was still studying at the university, not particular experienced with dating. His first wife remarried 1 year after their divorce, even faster than he married me. I don’t think he lied back then that they were separated and lived separate lives. After that, we had 15 years of committed and pretty happy relationship (10 first years of marriage included), and 5 more him hiding the affair. The affair partner is married herself, she’s 50 yo with 2 grown up kids, perfectly aware about him having a young child when she started sleeping with him for monetary gains. I don’t think it’s appropriate to compare the 2 situations.
He wasn’t wealthy when I met him.

Of course you don't. But the fact remains, you were the first whore splashing in the first wife's pool and using the closets in her house.

No. I was the wife who was repaying the loans he took to buy out his first wife. I literally paid from my own pocket for my own choices. In my case, he wants ME to buy him out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I do feel remorse and understand I made a mistake in my early 20s when I agreed to forgive his lie once. At the same time, I don't agree that my and his situation is the same as his affair with the current partner. This one is where both parties were totally aware at the beginning, willingly continued the relationship while both being married with kids. This is just the next level, because of the number of people they betrayed, and huge economic gain his new AP is getting from him being her supervisor at work.

I felt like he was my best choice, because he WAS in fact the smartest, the most attractive, the tallest guy, and he was talking so persuasively! Remember, cheaters can talk you into anything. You won't know it without a certain life experience, and I certainly didn't have this experience at 23. He wasn't wealthy back then, everything that's due to me now we've built together. We had about the same level of education, and both had plenty of loans.

Now that he's in a executive position and I was SAHM for many years he backstops me with a mistress which is a complete corporate prostitute.

Tell that 51-year old ho's husband. It's crazy that you haven't at least dropped an anonymous email or letter.

Not before I get my own divorce settlement.

Yes. Smart. But do it. He deserves to know---especially so he doesn't capitulate in a divorce if she instigates.

If he pushes the matters to trial, I will do much more than that. He and she both will be reported to their employer for embezzlement AFTER the divorce decree is issued. As it will be a forced assets sale, and court can't force me sign an NDA, I will be able to do it.
If he offers me a good settlement, then I will sign an NDA

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would file for divorce and ask for 1/2 the family business or life long alimony, child support and 1/2 of all real-estate and assets. Don't wait till you find a job. You own half that business. You worked in that business so that was your job.

And, make a custody schedule where he is responsible 50% of the time. Stop playing nice.

What are you waiting for?

+1000 Absolutely!!! You've got to take control of the situation. I know you said you don't care, but it has to be at least pretty annoying having him be rude and cruel. Just file.

[Anonymous]

I stopped believing her when she went from her OP that her husband moved downstairs to the basement, to he moved to the mansion’s carriage house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. I was 23 when he fed me the crap, he was my second sexual partner and I was still studying at the university, not particular experienced with dating. His first wife remarried 1 year after their divorce, even faster than he married me. I don’t think he lied back then that they were separated and lived separate lives. After that, we had 15 years of committed and pretty happy relationship (10 first years of marriage included), and 5 more him hiding the affair. The affair partner is married herself, she’s 50 yo with 2 grown up kids, perfectly aware about him having a young child when she started sleeping with him for monetary gains. I don’t think it’s appropriate to compare the 2 situations.
He wasn’t wealthy when I met him.

Of course you don't. But the fact remains, you were the first whore splashing in the first wife's pool and using the closets in her house.

No. I was the wife who was repaying the loans he took to buy out his first wife. I literally paid from my own pocket for my own choices. In my case, he wants ME to buy him out.

What do you expect

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I stopped believing her when she went from her OP that her husband moved downstairs to the basement, to he moved to the mansion’s carriage house.

Completely fake.