Poll: What killed the sex life with your spouse?

[Anonymous]

blatant disrespect, lack of empathy and emotional disconnection;
meh sex

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll say this as a man who reluctantly did both individual and marriage therapy but later took it seriously and learned a lot, a lot us men seriously underestimate how much our wives expect us to be more emotionally supportive. My therapist told me if a woman doesn't feel like you are emotionally supportive she won't be as enthusiastic having sex with you. Eventually it leads to a dead bedroom.

The hard part is actually learning to be emotionally supportive. It's not as simple as it sounds. The way we men listen, our body language we need to pay attention to all of it.

Just because a woman ‘feels’ something doesn’t make it true. Her ‘feelings’ could be due to her own mental issues. If a woman is rational and pragmatic, these so called ‘problems’ won’t exist.

Boo, you’ve mentioned “women have mental health issues” multiple times as a retort to women wanting emotional support.

It sounds like your entire experience with women is those with mental health problems, in which case you need to get yourself to therapy ASAP so you can learn why you attract and are attracted to those women.

This is a you problem.

Lol. Where did u get this idea that i attract women with mental issues?

From you!!! You keep repeating it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll say this as a man who reluctantly did both individual and marriage therapy but later took it seriously and learned a lot, a lot us men seriously underestimate how much our wives expect us to be more emotionally supportive. My therapist told me if a woman doesn't feel like you are emotionally supportive she won't be as enthusiastic having sex with you. Eventually it leads to a dead bedroom.

The hard part is actually learning to be emotionally supportive. It's not as simple as it sounds. The way we men listen, our body language we need to pay attention to all of it.

Just because a woman ‘feels’ something doesn’t make it true. Her ‘feelings’ could be due to her own mental issues. If a woman is rational and pragmatic, these so called ‘problems’ won’t exist.

Boo, you’ve mentioned “women have mental health issues” multiple times as a retort to women wanting emotional support.

It sounds like your entire experience with women is those with mental health problems, in which case you need to get yourself to therapy ASAP so you can learn why you attract and are attracted to those women.

This is a you problem.

Lol. Where did u get this idea that i attract women with mental issues?

From you!!! You keep repeating it.

Just because i m talking about someone doesn’t mean i m in a relationship with them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll say this as a man who reluctantly did both individual and marriage therapy but later took it seriously and learned a lot, a lot us men seriously underestimate how much our wives expect us to be more emotionally supportive. My therapist told me if a woman doesn't feel like you are emotionally supportive she won't be as enthusiastic having sex with you. Eventually it leads to a dead bedroom.

The hard part is actually learning to be emotionally supportive. It's not as simple as it sounds. The way we men listen, our body language we need to pay attention to all of it.

Radical idea. We don’t *need* to be anything we don’t feel comfortable being. Men shouldn’t have to be forced to be emotionally supportive for marriages to work any more than women should be forced to have children/not have children, cook/clean, or other things. How absurd would it be if therapy focused on the fact that men would be more enthusiastic about sex if their wives did all the housework?

LOL imagine thinking "men should get whatever they want from women without any effort on their part" is a radical idea.

Yeah, I guess the fact that women *feel* this is what is actually happening is a big part of the problem. By and large, UMC professional and professional adjacent women and their cohort feel a lot that doesn’t actually exist. They just think feelings matter more than fact.

Sounds like you feel really deeply that women cannot narrate their own lived experiences. But your feelings aren't facts, bro.

lol @ “lived experience” what jargony bs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll say this as a man who reluctantly did both individual and marriage therapy but later took it seriously and learned a lot, a lot us men seriously underestimate how much our wives expect us to be more emotionally supportive. My therapist told me if a woman doesn't feel like you are emotionally supportive she won't be as enthusiastic having sex with you. Eventually it leads to a dead bedroom.

The hard part is actually learning to be emotionally supportive. It's not as simple as it sounds. The way we men listen, our body language we need to pay attention to all of it.

Radical idea. We don’t *need* to be anything we don’t feel comfortable being. Men shouldn’t have to be forced to be emotionally supportive for marriages to work any more than women should be forced to have children/not have children, cook/clean, or other things. How absurd would it be if therapy focused on the fact that men would be more enthusiastic about sex if their wives did all the housework?

Is that not the point of this thread? Several women have posted their husbands stopped providing emotional support at some point. So, therefore sex has dried up. I've explained this to my husband multiple times that typically when dating, men "woo" a woman by taking her out on dates and then the woman reciprocates. This doesnt end once you get married. If you don't want to put in the effort to connect with me emotionally then I don't want to put in the effort to connect with you physically. I am literally telling him why he isn't getting laid, but he dismisses it as if i dont know what I'm talking about. Then later has the audacity to complain about his "needs". GMAFB.

You have “responsive desire.” It is critical for men to identify this trait and then avoid marriage with this kind of woman.

No, you completely misunderstood me. I really need the emotional connection that is established by regular conversations, showing interest about my life, date nights etc. Showing me attention by grabbing my ass does not spark an emotional connection. I didn't get married to be a glorified prostitute.

Right, your enjoyment of, and interest in, sex is completely conditional. You live in a world where sex is a reward for behavior that benefits you. Which puts you much closer to a prostitute than you think.

Dp bou live in a world where you think if you want sex the nearest woman must either immediately acquiesce or have her reasons for not wanting sex dismissed, diminished, or ignored. And evidently your enjoyment of, and interest in, sex has nothing to do with the desires of your partner. Which puts you right in line with the mentality of a rapist.

This is for the poster that said something about prostitute. One way your another, all men pay for a woman. So essentially we’re paying for prostitution. 😂

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll say this as a man who reluctantly did both individual and marriage therapy but later took it seriously and learned a lot, a lot us men seriously underestimate how much our wives expect us to be more emotionally supportive. My therapist told me if a woman doesn't feel like you are emotionally supportive she won't be as enthusiastic having sex with you. Eventually it leads to a dead bedroom.

The hard part is actually learning to be emotionally supportive. It's not as simple as it sounds. The way we men listen, our body language we need to pay attention to all of it.

Just because a woman ‘feels’ something doesn’t make it true. Her ‘feelings’ could be due to her own mental issues. If a woman is rational and pragmatic, these so called ‘problems’ won’t exist.

Boo, you’ve mentioned “women have mental health issues” multiple times as a retort to women wanting emotional support.

It sounds like your entire experience with women is those with mental health problems, in which case you need to get yourself to therapy ASAP so you can learn why you attract and are attracted to those women.

This is a you problem.

Lol. Where did u get this idea that i attract women with mental issues?

From you!!! You keep repeating it.

Just because i m talking about someone doesn’t mean i m in a relationship with them

It’s blatantly clear you aren’t in any kind of relationship. It’s also very clear why that is. You have so much anger towards women and consider them objects who need to serve you without ever having any needs of their own.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll say this as a man who reluctantly did both individual and marriage therapy but later took it seriously and learned a lot, a lot us men seriously underestimate how much our wives expect us to be more emotionally supportive. My therapist told me if a woman doesn't feel like you are emotionally supportive she won't be as enthusiastic having sex with you. Eventually it leads to a dead bedroom.

The hard part is actually learning to be emotionally supportive. It's not as simple as it sounds. The way we men listen, our body language we need to pay attention to all of it.

Radical idea. We don’t *need* to be anything we don’t feel comfortable being. Men shouldn’t have to be forced to be emotionally supportive for marriages to work any more than women should be forced to have children/not have children, cook/clean, or other things. How absurd would it be if therapy focused on the fact that men would be more enthusiastic about sex if their wives did all the housework?

Is that not the point of this thread? Several women have posted their husbands stopped providing emotional support at some point. So, therefore sex has dried up. I've explained this to my husband multiple times that typically when dating, men "woo" a woman by taking her out on dates and then the woman reciprocates. This doesnt end once you get married. If you don't want to put in the effort to connect with me emotionally then I don't want to put in the effort to connect with you physically. I am literally telling him why he isn't getting laid, but he dismisses it as if i dont know what I'm talking about. Then later has the audacity to complain about his "needs". GMAFB.

You have “responsive desire.” It is critical for men to identify this trait and then avoid marriage with this kind of woman.

No, you completely misunderstood me. I really need the emotional connection that is established by regular conversations, showing interest about my life, date nights etc. Showing me attention by grabbing my ass does not spark an emotional connection. I didn't get married to be a glorified prostitute.

Right, your enjoyment of, and interest in, sex is completely conditional. You live in a world where sex is a reward for behavior that benefits you. Which puts you much closer to a prostitute than you think.

Dp bou live in a world where you think if you want sex the nearest woman must either immediately acquiesce or have her reasons for not wanting sex dismissed, diminished, or ignored. And evidently your enjoyment of, and interest in, sex has nothing to do with the desires of your partner. Which puts you right in line with the mentality of a rapist.

This is for the poster that said something about prostitute. One way your another, all men pay for a woman. So essentially we’re paying for prostitution. 😂

You’re a sick, angry, sad man. I doubt you have many options and it’s probably all that rejection that made you so angry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would have thought more people would just respond that it’s because their hormonal desire is low. Statistically, the majority of women dont have natural day to day drive. I’d assume that’s the driving factor in the majority of cases, and all the other things above are just “excuses” that are covering up for the fact that you’re not naturally horny anymore.

I think women do have a natural day to day drive. When I’m single or in a good relationship, I have a very high drive.

Most women just lose interest after being with someone who doesn’t care about her needs (emotional, physical, etc), doesn’t pull his own weight, or is just a low quality man. Then it’s the body’s protective mechanism to avoid getting pregnant with a dud.

Get her around a cute guy who acts like a grown up and pays attention to her, and the daily drive comes back.

This

Yup

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll say this as a man who reluctantly did both individual and marriage therapy but later took it seriously and learned a lot, a lot us men seriously underestimate how much our wives expect us to be more emotionally supportive. My therapist told me if a woman doesn't feel like you are emotionally supportive she won't be as enthusiastic having sex with you. Eventually it leads to a dead bedroom.

The hard part is actually learning to be emotionally supportive. It's not as simple as it sounds. The way we men listen, our body language we need to pay attention to all of it.

Radical idea. We don’t *need* to be anything we don’t feel comfortable being. Men shouldn’t have to be forced to be emotionally supportive for marriages to work any more than women should be forced to have children/not have children, cook/clean, or other things. How absurd would it be if therapy focused on the fact that men would be more enthusiastic about sex if their wives did all the housework?

Is that not the point of this thread? Several women have posted their husbands stopped providing emotional support at some point. So, therefore sex has dried up. I've explained this to my husband multiple times that typically when dating, men "woo" a woman by taking her out on dates and then the woman reciprocates. This doesnt end once you get married. If you don't want to put in the effort to connect with me emotionally then I don't want to put in the effort to connect with you physically. I am literally telling him why he isn't getting laid, but he dismisses it as if i dont know what I'm talking about. Then later has the audacity to complain about his "needs". GMAFB.

You have “responsive desire.” It is critical for men to identify this trait and then avoid marriage with this kind of woman.

No, you completely misunderstood me. I really need the emotional connection that is established by regular conversations, showing interest about my life, date nights etc. Showing me attention by grabbing my ass does not spark an emotional connection. I didn't get married to be a glorified prostitute.

Right, your enjoyment of, and interest in, sex is completely conditional. You live in a world where sex is a reward for behavior that benefits you. Which puts you much closer to a prostitute than you think.

I'm a prostitute because I would prefer my husband to ask me how my day went? Lollll

Your problem is that you think sex is something that women do for men, if they deserve it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll say this as a man who reluctantly did both individual and marriage therapy but later took it seriously and learned a lot, a lot us men seriously underestimate how much our wives expect us to be more emotionally supportive. My therapist told me if a woman doesn't feel like you are emotionally supportive she won't be as enthusiastic having sex with you. Eventually it leads to a dead bedroom.

The hard part is actually learning to be emotionally supportive. It's not as simple as it sounds. The way we men listen, our body language we need to pay attention to all of it.

Radical idea. We don’t *need* to be anything we don’t feel comfortable being. Men shouldn’t have to be forced to be emotionally supportive for marriages to work any more than women should be forced to have children/not have children, cook/clean, or other things. How absurd would it be if therapy focused on the fact that men would be more enthusiastic about sex if their wives did all the housework?

Is that not the point of this thread? Several women have posted their husbands stopped providing emotional support at some point. So, therefore sex has dried up. I've explained this to my husband multiple times that typically when dating, men "woo" a woman by taking her out on dates and then the woman reciprocates. This doesnt end once you get married. If you don't want to put in the effort to connect with me emotionally then I don't want to put in the effort to connect with you physically. I am literally telling him why he isn't getting laid, but he dismisses it as if i dont know what I'm talking about. Then later has the audacity to complain about his "needs". GMAFB.

You have “responsive desire.” It is critical for men to identify this trait and then avoid marriage with this kind of woman.

No, you completely misunderstood me. I really need the emotional connection that is established by regular conversations, showing interest about my life, date nights etc. Showing me attention by grabbing my ass does not spark an emotional connection. I didn't get married to be a glorified prostitute.

Right, your enjoyment of, and interest in, sex is completely conditional. You live in a world where sex is a reward for behavior that benefits you. Which puts you much closer to a prostitute than you think.

I'm a prostitute because I would prefer my husband to ask me how my day went? Lollll

Your problem is that you think sex is something that women do for men, if they deserve it.

No wonder you aren’t getting any! Sorry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:porn

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll say this as a man who reluctantly did both individual and marriage therapy but later took it seriously and learned a lot, a lot us men seriously underestimate how much our wives expect us to be more emotionally supportive. My therapist told me if a woman doesn't feel like you are emotionally supportive she won't be as enthusiastic having sex with you. Eventually it leads to a dead bedroom.

The hard part is actually learning to be emotionally supportive. It's not as simple as it sounds. The way we men listen, our body language we need to pay attention to all of it.

Just because a woman ‘feels’ something doesn’t make it true. Her ‘feelings’ could be due to her own mental issues. If a woman is rational and pragmatic, these so called ‘problems’ won’t exist.

Boo, you’ve mentioned “women have mental health issues” multiple times as a retort to women wanting emotional support.

It sounds like your entire experience with women is those with mental health problems, in which case you need to get yourself to therapy ASAP so you can learn why you attract and are attracted to those women.

This is a you problem.

Lol. Where did u get this idea that i attract women with mental issues?

From you!!! You keep repeating it.

Just because i m talking about someone doesn’t mean i m in a relationship with them

It’s blatantly clear you aren’t in any kind of relationship. It’s also very clear why that is. You have so much anger towards women and consider them objects who need to serve you without ever having any needs of their own.

Lol keep making stuff up

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll say this as a man who reluctantly did both individual and marriage therapy but later took it seriously and learned a lot, a lot us men seriously underestimate how much our wives expect us to be more emotionally supportive. My therapist told me if a woman doesn't feel like you are emotionally supportive she won't be as enthusiastic having sex with you. Eventually it leads to a dead bedroom.

The hard part is actually learning to be emotionally supportive. It's not as simple as it sounds. The way we men listen, our body language we need to pay attention to all of it.

Just because a woman ‘feels’ something doesn’t make it true. Her ‘feelings’ could be due to her own mental issues. If a woman is rational and pragmatic, these so called ‘problems’ won’t exist.

Boo, you’ve mentioned “women have mental health issues” multiple times as a retort to women wanting emotional support.

It sounds like your entire experience with women is those with mental health problems, in which case you need to get yourself to therapy ASAP so you can learn why you attract and are attracted to those women.

This is a you problem.

Lol. Where did u get this idea that i attract women with mental issues?

From you!!! You keep repeating it.

Just because i m talking about someone doesn’t mean i m in a relationship with them

It’s blatantly clear you aren’t in any kind of relationship. It’s also very clear why that is. You have so much anger towards women and consider them objects who need to serve you without ever having any needs of their own.

Lol keep making stuff up

NP. Are you saying that you don’t have anger towards women? Because your posts say something else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'll say this as a man who reluctantly did both individual and marriage therapy but later took it seriously and learned a lot, a lot us men seriously underestimate how much our wives expect us to be more emotionally supportive. My therapist told me if a woman doesn't feel like you are emotionally supportive she won't be as enthusiastic having sex with you. Eventually it leads to a dead bedroom.

The hard part is actually learning to be emotionally supportive. It's not as simple as it sounds. The way we men listen, our body language we need to pay attention to all of it.

Radical idea. We don’t *need* to be anything we don’t feel comfortable being. Men shouldn’t have to be forced to be emotionally supportive for marriages to work any more than women should be forced to have children/not have children, cook/clean, or other things. How absurd would it be if therapy focused on the fact that men would be more enthusiastic about sex if their wives did all the housework?

Is that not the point of this thread? Several women have posted their husbands stopped providing emotional support at some point. So, therefore sex has dried up. I've explained this to my husband multiple times that typically when dating, men "woo" a woman by taking her out on dates and then the woman reciprocates. This doesnt end once you get married. If you don't want to put in the effort to connect with me emotionally then I don't want to put in the effort to connect with you physically. I am literally telling him why he isn't getting laid, but he dismisses it as if i dont know what I'm talking about. Then later has the audacity to complain about his "needs". GMAFB.

You have “responsive desire.” It is critical for men to identify this trait and then avoid marriage with this kind of woman.

No, you completely misunderstood me. I really need the emotional connection that is established by regular conversations, showing interest about my life, date nights etc. Showing me attention by grabbing my ass does not spark an emotional connection. I didn't get married to be a glorified prostitute.

Right, your enjoyment of, and interest in, sex is completely conditional. You live in a world where sex is a reward for behavior that benefits you. Which puts you much closer to a prostitute than you think.

I'm a prostitute because I would prefer my husband to ask me how my day went? Lollll

Your problem is that you think sex is something that women do for men, if they deserve it.

No, it has nothing to do with that. I don't have sex with strangers. For someone to not be considered a stranger, there generally needs to be some sort of conversation going on. It has nothing to do with punishment and rewards. Go seek help troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He can't perform and won't take steps to try to improve. Thinks I should appreciate his soft p...s rubbing on me.
Terrible hygiene on his part.

Ugh.