Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers

[Anonymous]

I just thank god none of you anxious parents were my parents. Sleepovers were the best. My son and daughter attended and hosted sleepovers. We all have life long friends. You people need to chill. I feel so sorry for your kids. They will always be the odd kid.

[Anonymous]

I think your husband or son might molest my daughter so she can't sleep over. But we're totally safe. Trust us. Let your child sleep here because you clearly don't care if we might be molesters.

DCUM, you are something , man.

[Anonymous]

More children are sexually abused by COACHES & FAMILY MEMBERS than at sleepovers. And I see a billion soccer threads on this sight. No one is stopping their child from playing sports or seeing family.

They estimate 33-50% of girls abused are perpetrated by FAMILY MEMBERS. It is known that molesters gravitate towards jobs where they work with children like priests or coaches.

STOP THE FEAR MONGERING WITH SLEEPOVERS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Severe allergies. Everyone's house is dirty, and people allow their pets to trample all over the place.

I find this post fascinating. You must have an insanely clean house. And hate dogs.

A kid with severe allergies slept over here once. I watched a you tube about epi pens before I went to bed.

New poster here. You should have “watched” a you tube video prior to the kid coming over.

I didn’t know he had one until later when he was looking for his bag. I knew about the allergies and planned dinner appropriately.

[Anonymous]

I am tired, that is why we don’t do many sleepovers.
The kids in my older child’s peer group have a lot of ADHD/executive functioning issues and it is horrible having them over. My younger kid’s friends are great, but if I let them sleep over more, then I have to give same opportunity to my older child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:More children are sexually abused by COACHES & FAMILY MEMBERS than at sleepovers. And I see a billion soccer threads on this sight. No one is stopping their child from playing sports or seeing family.

They estimate 33-50% of girls abused are perpetrated by FAMILY MEMBERS. It is known that molesters gravitate towards jobs where they work with children like priests or coaches.

STOP THE FEAR MONGERING WITH SLEEPOVERS.

Why do you care so much? It doesn’t impact you at all if someone chooses not do sleepovers. You’re shrieking into the void about something that has zero effect on you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More children are sexually abused by COACHES & FAMILY MEMBERS than at sleepovers. And I see a billion soccer threads on this sight. No one is stopping their child from playing sports or seeing family.

They estimate 33-50% of girls abused are perpetrated by FAMILY MEMBERS. It is known that molesters gravitate towards jobs where they work with children like priests or coaches.

STOP THE FEAR MONGERING WITH SLEEPOVERS.

Why do you care so much? It doesn’t impact you at all if someone chooses not do sleepovers. You’re shrieking into the void about something that has zero effect on you.

This is what I am wondering, as well. Why do you all care if I don’t let my kids sleep at your house? My kids are not suffering - they had a double sleepover this weekend. They had friends over Friday, and then slept over at another friend’s house last night. One set of people we have known for six years, the others I went to college with the mom (I’ve known her for 25 years, and her husband for 12). Why does it bother you that I won’t let my kid sleep at your house and I don’t even know you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My wife was molested and raped as a kid. One of the incidents happened at a sleepover. Another happened kind of fast at a playdate where her friend's older brother made her go down on him. I've dated a number of women who've shared horrific stories of things that happened to them. I was totally on board when my wife said that she didn't want any playdates or sleepovers. I know the statistics, but it's not a risk I'm willing to take.

We weren't graphic, but we explained to our daughter that some people do things to kids, and it would be safer to wait until she was in high school. She's nine now. She's had the more graphic sex talk, and we went a little more detailed into what rape and molestation were. She connected the dots with playdates and being mindful of strangers.

I am so sorry these things happened to your wife. We are pretty strict about no cleepovers, too, for reasons similar to yours. People who are dismissive about these possibilities are truly lucky they have never experienced them.

I was molested at a sleepover, as well as while just hanging out at a friend's home during the day, and I have spent many years in therapy so I do not let my past painful experiences inhibit my children from partaking in normal, fun, and developmentally appropriate and important childhood experiences like sleepovers and playdates. It is not that I am dismissive of these experiences - it's that I take steps so that my own anxieties don't get passed on to my children. It would be selfish and incredibly damaging to my children of me to do otherwise.

That's terrible, and good for you. But my sense is that you are not being dismissive of concerns, you are just approaching them in a different, rational way. Many posters here have been flippant and downright obnoxious, not thoughtful and understanding.

[Anonymous]

Camp sleepovers aren’t worth it. Think the pro sleepover camp on this thread should chill the F out. The normal pro sleepover folks aren’t posting here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:More children are sexually abused by COACHES & FAMILY MEMBERS than at sleepovers. And I see a billion soccer threads on this sight. No one is stopping their child from playing sports or seeing family.

They estimate 33-50% of girls abused are perpetrated by FAMILY MEMBERS. It is known that molesters gravitate towards jobs where they work with children like priests or coaches.

STOP THE FEAR MONGERING WITH SLEEPOVERS.

For me, its not knowing a family well, lack of supervision, kids behavior (you know the wild kids where the parents stand around doing nothing to get the behavior under control), parents screaming at kids, not feeding kids, kids fending for themselves, etc. If I know a family reasonably well, fine. If you call me and I have no idea who you are, no.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More children are sexually abused by COACHES & FAMILY MEMBERS than at sleepovers. And I see a billion soccer threads on this sight. No one is stopping their child from playing sports or seeing family.

They estimate 33-50% of girls abused are perpetrated by FAMILY MEMBERS. It is known that molesters gravitate towards jobs where they work with children like priests or coaches.

STOP THE FEAR MONGERING WITH SLEEPOVERS.

Why do you care so much? It doesn’t impact you at all if someone chooses not do sleepovers. You’re shrieking into the void about something that has zero effect on you.

This is what I am wondering, as well. Why do you all care if I don’t let my kids sleep at your house? My kids are not suffering - they had a double sleepover this weekend. They had friends over Friday, and then slept over at another friend’s house last night. One set of people we have known for six years, the others I went to college with the mom (I’ve known her for 25 years, and her husband for 12). Why does it bother you that I won’t let my kid sleep at your house and I don’t even know you?

This is the real issue. The parents that are too busy to get to know the other parents or who cannot be bothered. If you cannot be bothered with me, I am not handing over my child as you are using mine to get out of you spending time with yours.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More children are sexually abused by COACHES & FAMILY MEMBERS than at sleepovers. And I see a billion soccer threads on this sight. No one is stopping their child from playing sports or seeing family.

They estimate 33-50% of girls abused are perpetrated by FAMILY MEMBERS. It is known that molesters gravitate towards jobs where they work with children like priests or coaches.

STOP THE FEAR MONGERING WITH SLEEPOVERS.

Why do you care so much? It doesn’t impact you at all if someone chooses not do sleepovers. You’re shrieking into the void about something that has zero effect on you.

This is what I am wondering, as well. Why do you all care if I don’t let my kids sleep at your house? My kids are not suffering - they had a double sleepover this weekend. They had friends over Friday, and then slept over at another friend’s house last night. One set of people we have known for six years, the others I went to college with the mom (I’ve known her for 25 years, and her husband for 12). Why does it bother you that I won’t let my kid sleep at your house and I don’t even know you?

This is the real issue. The parents that are too busy to get to know the other parents or who cannot be bothered. If you cannot be bothered with me, I am not handing over my child as you are using mine to get out of you spending time with yours.

I hear you. I’m not the type to tell you my kids can’t sleep at your house but yours are welcome to sleep at mine. I’m happy to hang out with new people - my kids just won’t be sleeping at your house anytime soon.

[Anonymous]

Just read today's NYT. Some disturbing stuff.

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/09/29/us/pedophiles-online-sex-abuse.html

https://www.nytimes.com/2019/09/29/us/takeaways-child-sex-abuse.html

[Anonymous]

Because I love my sleep and so do my kids.

I went to the party portion of sleepovers but my parents always picked me up around 9:30 or so. God love them, they knew I was a nightmare without good sleep (still am).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:More children are sexually abused by COACHES & FAMILY MEMBERS than at sleepovers. And I see a billion soccer threads on this sight. No one is stopping their child from playing sports or seeing family.

They estimate 33-50% of girls abused are perpetrated by FAMILY MEMBERS. It is known that molesters gravitate towards jobs where they work with children like priests or coaches.

STOP THE FEAR MONGERING WITH SLEEPOVERS.

Why do you care so much? It doesn’t impact you at all if someone chooses not do sleepovers. You’re shrieking into the void about something that has zero effect on you.

This is what I am wondering, as well. Why do you all care if I don’t let my kids sleep at your house? My kids are not suffering - they had a double sleepover this weekend. They had friends over Friday, and then slept over at another friend’s house last night. One set of people we have known for six years, the others I went to college with the mom (I’ve known her for 25 years, and her husband for 12). Why does it bother you that I won’t let my kid sleep at your house and I don’t even know you?

I don't care about where your children are sleeping. I do care that people are misinformed about sexual abuse.