Reply to Tell me your reasons for not allowing sleepovers

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My wife was molested and raped as a kid. One of the incidents happened at a sleepover. Another happened kind of fast at a playdate where her friend's older brother made her go down on him. I've dated a number of women who've shared horrific stories of things that happened to them. I was totally on board when my wife said that she didn't want any playdates or sleepovers. I know the statistics, but it's not a risk I'm willing to take.

We weren't graphic, but we explained to our daughter that some people do things to kids, and it would be safer to wait until she was in high school. She's nine now. She's had the more graphic sex talk, and we went a little more detailed into what rape and molestation were. She connected the dots with playdates and being mindful of strangers. [/quote]

I am so sorry these things happened to your wife. We are pretty strict about no cleepovers, too, for reasons similar to yours. [b]People who are dismissive about these possibilities are truly lucky they have never experienced them.[/b] [/quote]
I was molested at a sleepover, as well as while just hanging out at a friend's home during the day, and I have spent many years in therapy so I do not let my past painful experiences inhibit my children from partaking in normal, fun, and developmentally appropriate and important childhood experiences like sleepovers and playdates. It is not that I am dismissive of these experiences - it's that I take steps so that my own anxieties don't get passed on to my children. It would be selfish and incredibly damaging to my children of me to do otherwise. [/quote]

That's terrible, and good for you. But my sense is that you are not being dismissive of concerns, you are just approaching them in a different, rational way. Many posters here have been flippant and downright obnoxious, not thoughtful and understanding.[/quote]

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