40-year-old man in a 1BR condo – problem?

[Anonymous]

what do you have to offer OP?

What do you have to offer a relationship, any relationship?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:whoopee. for a single 40 year old guy 600K doesn't sound like that much. my DD is 29 and she has that much money in the bank already.

Wow dcum is on another planet.

even maxing out a 401K with $17-18k a year plus match would have compounded to $400k over 7 years of working if invested in S&P, nasdaq, tech index. THere are tons of "millionnaire" retirement funds of fully invested workers in this country due to the long bull market and never ending stimulus propping up the market. Different now but par for the course for anyone who saved money and invested in the public markets.

[Anonymous]

Condo is fine. No desire to ever cohabitate is not ok for me - it may be for others. Just be upfront about it, no need to lead people to think otherwise. That just wastes your time and theirs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t understand why you’re posting, op. Do you like your condo? You aren’t interested in marriage or living together so what does it matter?

Something about you seems… off. The condo is fine. Going to see your parents a lot is fine. Not cooking or cleaning is fine, though how you describe why you don’t do either reminds me of what addicts tend to say meaning they have no desire (and the key word is desire) to do basic life skills.
You also mention privacy, and gain, the only time I’ve heard an adult mention privacy in that context is when they are hiding something, an addiction, sex with someone they shouldn’t have sex with like an underage person or a prostitute.. healthy adults just don’t phrase things the way you have.

Know too that the women you date don’t care about your finances, why would they, they aren’t gaining anything by simply going out with you and going to bed with you. Same for your work, they won’t care how hard you work, it isn’t going to do anything for them.
You do you, op, just know nobody has to put up with you. You aren’t owed a relationship.

agree something is "off" and it's not having a 1BR condo.

[Anonymous]

My ideal setup would be a 1-2 BR condo in the city, and a weekend place in the country with some acres.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My ideal setup would be a 1-2 BR condo in the city, and a weekend place in the country with some acres.

too much work, no deal.

[Anonymous]

I love how all the women probably posting on other threads about how much they hate their marriage and how women are better off staying single, are getting on OP about not greeting his dates with "I don't want to get married." Lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love how all the women probably posting on other threads about how much they hate their marriage and how women are better off staying single, are getting on OP about not greeting his dates with "I don't want to get married." Lol.

Unless he looks like Pete Davidson below the waist and his favorite dessert is muff pie I don’t think OP has anything to offer women who don’t want to marry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love how all the women probably posting on other threads about how much they hate their marriage and how women are better off staying single, are getting on OP about not greeting his dates with "I don't want to get married." Lol.

Unless he looks like Pete Davidson below the waist and his favorite dessert is muff pie I don’t think OP has anything to offer women who don’t want to marry.

This is Dcum Hall of Fame right here!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love how all the women probably posting on other threads about how much they hate their marriage and how women are better off staying single, are getting on OP about not greeting his dates with "I don't want to get married." Lol.

You and OP have a lot in common. Lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love how all the women probably posting on other threads about how much they hate their marriage and how women are better off staying single, are getting on OP about not greeting his dates with "I don't want to get married." Lol.

I mean, they just want him to be honest. He is talking about changing his living situation to trick women into thinking marriage may be on the table, when it isn't.

[Anonymous]

The only problem I see is that you seem to be hiding the ball in terms of what you want out of a relationship. When do you tell women you're dating that cohabitation/marriage are not on the table? There are plenty of women who will be fine with that, but you shouldn't be wasting the time of the women who aren't.

[Anonymous]

He wants sex but not the commitment. This is what you get with a guy who lives alone in his 40s and eats at his parents’ house 3x a week. Anything else is not in his bandwidth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
My guess is that OP has some generalized anxiety issues and is easily overwhelmed. He has set up his life to be as stress-free as possible and probably takes pleasure in the comforting routine of visits with his parents. There is nothing wrong with any of this, but he will need to choose someone similar as a girlfriend. I would be completely candid about your life preferences in a dating profile- definitely lead with your feelings about marriage. It is silly to waste everyone’s time; there is someone similarly inflexible out there that honesty will help you find.

+1000 You nailed it, kindly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nope. Better than then roommate rental situation my friends found their husband's in.

I actually see the paid off mortgage as a plus - you and your spouse should be able to put a much larger down payment down when you're ready.

OP doesn’t want to get married. He’s married to his mom.

Eww, this is just GROSS. 🤨

To be married to your own Mother is just sick sick sick…