40-year-old man in a 1BR condo – problem?

[Anonymous]

This is my situation. Condo is paid off and in a nice area. I also have about $600K in the bank so it’s not a financial issue.

The issue is I love the peace and greenery of single-family homes so I spend a lot of time at my parents’ house, which is five minutes from my condo. A two-bedroom condo is not going to give me much more in that regard than a one-bedroom condo. And buying a house in this area would entail so much expense and hassle that I’m not interested in that right now.

Just curious if you women would perceive this as a negative in the dating market, i.e. that’s too small a place for a 40-year-old or it may indicate I’m not serious about marriage. (Truthfully, I’m not interested in getting married but I don’t *lead* with that so women don’t think I am only interested in sex.)

Anyway, one-bedroom apartment for a 40-year-old man – is that a problem?

[Anonymous]

You tell us. Has it been a problem so far?

[Anonymous]

Friend of mine lived in one his entire working life. Just retired to a Caribbean island at 62.

He's gay, though.

[Anonymous]

No. In fact I might prefer you own a condo but have a desire to buy a house because that would mean we would pick the house out together.

It is nice to have a two bedroom, though, if you are a couple. I would not want to move in and share your place with you for more than a few months.

If you buy a house, be aware that the woman you marry might not want it and might want to move to another house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. In fact I might prefer you own a condo but have a desire to buy a house because that would mean we would pick the house out together.

It is nice to have a two bedroom, though, if you are a couple. I would not want to move in and share your place with you for more than a few months.

If you buy a house, be aware that the woman you marry might not want it and might want to move to another house.

I just wrote this. And then re read your post.

Hold up. How much time do you spend at your parents house? Do you sleep there? Go eat dinner there all the time? Do your laundry there?

And why don’t you want to get married? Please don’t hide that from women. That’s really not fair.

You sound like a mamas boy.

[Anonymous]

I have a 1900 sf condo in DC. I also have a 6,000 sf beach house. I don’t mention the beach house until it is a solid relationship. Condo was never an issue.

[Anonymous]

Woman here. It’s more about how you decorate it.
Does it look like a college dorm or pulled together and mature?
I would have simple fresh looking pillows and linens. Masculine of course, but that’s all really

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Woman here. It’s more about how you decorate it.
Does it look like a college dorm or pulled together and mature?
I would have simple fresh looking pillows and linens. Masculine of course, but that’s all really

+1. The condo would not be an issue. Loose boundaries with the parents might be.

[Anonymous]

Nothing wrong with living in a one bedroom condo, even if it’s just a rental. I would assume that you would be open to getting a bigger place of some sort should you cohabitate. The visiting your parents all the time, on the other hand…that would be a fed glad for me.

Also, you should be up front about not wanting to get married.

[Anonymous]

Nope. Better than then roommate rental situation my friends found their husband's in.

I actually see the paid off mortgage as a plus - you and your spouse should be able to put a much larger down payment down when you're ready.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wrong with living in a one bedroom condo, even if it’s just a rental. I would assume that you would be open to getting a bigger place of some sort should you cohabitate. The visiting your parents all the time, on the other hand…that would be a fed glad for me.

Also, you should be up front about not wanting to get married.

+1. You sound enmeshed with your parents. Be upfront about your very close relationship with your parents and your desire to stay unmarried to the women you date.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Nope. Better than then roommate rental situation my friends found their husband's in.

I actually see the paid off mortgage as a plus - you and your spouse should be able to put a much larger down payment down when you're ready.

OP doesn’t want to get married. He’s married to his mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nope. Better than then roommate rental situation my friends found their husband's in.

I actually see the paid off mortgage as a plus - you and your spouse should be able to put a much larger down payment down when you're ready.

OP doesn’t want to get married. He’s married to his mom.

He's not against it. And there's nothing wrong with enjoying a house owned by your parents nearby. If he's a single child, he'll inherit it anyway then I bet his 'prospective spouse would be bragging about 'we' have $2 million in equity in D.C. - so lucky!

[Anonymous]

If I were a woman I’d take one look at your situation and know everything about you without you having to open your mouth.

[Anonymous]

Op your an asshole. You should be upfront about not wanting marriage, then your condo will make perfect sense.