Should I tell my wife that I got the OW pregnant?

[Anonymous]

OP, you have yet to answer the most important question on this thread, which is ALL you should be considering in your decision making at this point:

What course of action do you think is best for your three year old daughter at this point?

I am guessing it is not to run off and get married/having a baby ASAP, while seeing your daughter "as much as I can". I mean, do you plan to share custody or just be an every other weekend dad?

How do you plan to mitigate the damage you're doing to your daughter?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you have yet to answer the most important question on this thread, which is ALL you should be considering in your decision making at this point:

What course of action do you think is best for your three year old daughter at this point?

I am guessing it is not to run off and get married/having a baby ASAP, while seeing your daughter "as much as I can". I mean, do you plan to share custody or just be an every other weekend dad?

How do you plan to mitigate the damage you're doing to your daughter?

The plan is to share custody.

[Anonymous]

Real friends wouldn't be biased in a situation like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Real friends wouldn't be biased in a situation like this.

I know my friends would be. They didn't want me to marry her in the first place so I know if I confide in them about any issues the advice would automatically be "divorce her".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Real friends wouldn't be biased in a situation like this.

I know my friends would be. They didn't want me to marry her in the first place so I know if I confide in them about any issues the advice would automatically be "divorce her".

That's pretty sad....seriously.

You should have gone to a therapist, alone. That would have got your unbiased opinion.

[Anonymous]

You come off as a jerk. I mean you are in a newish marriage have a,1 year old baby and already having an affair and impregnating another woman and now you want to get married again and you haven't even left the home of your current wife. It's like marriage and children are just widgets to you. Like leasing a car. Buying carryout. Jesus.

Yes, please, tell your wife you got another,woman pregnant. She will thank you later, because it will set her free to find a man who cherishes her and cherishes the vow of marriage. Don't drag the ending out.

[Anonymous]

OP, wait till your gf is 3-4 months pregnant then tell your soon to be ex wife. You don't have to, but it's okay to tell her too. If you think your wife will go crazy or become vindictive then absolutely don't tell her. In this case it's better to wait till the divorce is final. Good luck with the divorce and your babies!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well your dick got you in a deep trouble. How come you did not use birth control? I guess the baby is coming so too late now. Do you have kids?

I would kick you to curb and take you for everything. I would do this so the skank that you end up with Have no money.

You like a loser and a soon to be broke loser at that.

So he should tell her then?

[Anonymous]

Yes!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You come off as a jerk. I mean you are in a newish marriage have a,1 year old baby and already having an affair and impregnating another woman and now you want to get married again and you haven't even left the home of your current wife. It's like marriage and children are just widgets to you. Like leasing a car. Buying carryout. Jesus.

Yes, please, tell your wife you got another,woman pregnant. She will thank you later, because it will set her free to find a man who cherishes her and cherishes the vow of marriage. Don't drag the ending out.

I've been married going on 5 years and have a three year old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:At least wait until you know if it's a viable pregnancy. Are you planning to live with OW and raise this child?

Yes, it's only right that I marry her once my divorce is final.

LOL

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You come off as a jerk. I mean you are in a newish marriage have a,1 year old baby and already having an affair and impregnating another woman and now you want to get married again and you haven't even left the home of your current wife. It's like marriage and children are just widgets to you. Like leasing a car. Buying carryout. Jesus.

Yes, please, tell your wife you got another,woman pregnant. She will thank you later, because it will set her free to find a man who cherishes her and cherishes the vow of marriage. Don't drag the ending out.

I've been married going on 5 years and have a three year old.

Being married only 4 years is a new marriage.

[Anonymous]

Was your wife pregnant when you got married? You mentioned that you got married because you both wanted to start a family....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I'll explain everything to her when she's older. I had an affair and fell in love with another woman. Am I really that terrible?

yes

Your dd will most likely be doomed to choose other men who only can cheat.
The chances of you being faithful to the OW are slim to none too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op - don't get married again. Go to a therapist. Live alone so you can sort yourself out and hopefully not destroy more lives. Maybe monogamy isn't right for you. You need to do some serious self reflection otherwise your claims of regret are just bullshit. Plus you must know you really can't trust OW enough to marry her if she trapped you with pregnancy (the pill does not have mistakes.) this 2nd marriage will just end in another messy divorce and ruined woman you'll feel bad about. Focus on your kid(s)-try to be the best possible dad-ask your therapist how to help them cope. they really do need you and they are the only ones that you can help at this point.

I cheated on my wife. OW got pregnant. I got divorced and married AP.
1. I was wrong and eventually made amends with ex-wife
2. Have been married for over 20 years with current wife and no further cheating by either of us
3. I have a great relationship with my kids from my first marriage. They were and probably are still affected by the divorce, and I take responsibility and deeply regret this.
4. My kids from my first marriage are very close from my kids from my second marriage. I am very grateful and proud of them for this.
5. My ex-wife has not re-married and even has been seriously involved with someone else. I think she is the one who has chosen to not be involved with another man. We were both unhappy with our marriage, although I freely admit I could have handled the dissolution of our marriage better.