Wife is upset that I'm not reacting strongly enough to the Kavanaugh hearings

[Anonymous]

I was sexually assaulted and seriously harassed (by the same person) and this whole thing has been stirring up a lot of emotion for me that I thought I was over.

[Anonymous]

Your wife is a closed mind drone

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m married to a Kavanaugh and trump supporter and can’t stand him.

I wish I was married to one. Female conservative with a brain. Actual SA survivor. Not anti-men. Fear for the young men in this country with so many women labeling any man that even smiles at them a “sexual predator”.

[Anonymous]

All Men are rapists. All women are victims.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All Men are rapists. All women are victims.

All women are whites just asking for it.

[Anonymous]

Woman here. Sorry your wife is nut case. I personally do not believe Fords statements, and stand behind Kavanaugh. It’s disgusting that his reputation is tarnished after a 36 year old accusation that’s isn’t credible. There were too many holes in her story, and her own lifelong friend said it never happened. This was paid for by the dems to delay process until the mid-election votes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My wife and I have been together for five years, and married for a little over one. For the most part, we have a good relationship. Politically, we're both liberal; we grew up in liberal families with liberal values in liberal areas of the country. Although we both vote, we're not politically active (ex. volunteering on campaigns, etc).

One of the bigger issues is how we react to negative things happening in our lives. My wife is the kind of person to wear her emotions on her sleeve, and be very emotional and outwardly upset when something negative happens to her, while I'm more of the kind of person to look on the bright side of things and try to stay positive. Again, nothing wrong with either method, everyone is different.

However, our difference in how we deal with negative things came to light two years ago when Trump was elected. Leading up to the election, we both talked about how Trump is a mysognist jerk, etc, but we never really talked about what it would be like if he was President, probably because we both never believed it would happen. Of course, he did get elected, and when it happened, she was visibly upset, while I was just like "well, this is really crappy, and it puts alot of people in a crappy position, but tomorrow's another day." This really bothered her for two reasons 1) how I was just brushing off Trump getting elected like it was no big deal and 2) alot of the issues that Trump disagreed with the liberal voting base had to do with women's rights (abortion laws, changes in birth control, etc). My wife felt that since I'm a man, I don't care about those issues, since I hadn't been vocal about them. We got into a mini fight, but after talking about it later that day, the issue was more about me not being vocal about my feelings, and we moved past it.

Since Trump's election, I've been making an effort to be vocal about the things his administration is doing that bother me. Some of it is stuff that hits close to home personally for me (immigration issues, as I come from a family of immigrants), but alot of it is the women's rights issues that my wife feels strongly about as well.

As the Kavanaugh hearings have progressed, we haven't had alot of conversation about the hearings, mostly talk about it in abstract how we have the same feelings about it (wow, Kavanaugh is such an asshole, Dr. Ford really has a strong case, things like that). Last night was the most we had talked about it, since we both watched different parts of the hearings separately, but again, the conversation never dived into a deeper "how do we feel about this?"

This morning, I came downstairs to her watching the hearings and she said "this is bad, it looks like he's going to get confirmed." I replied "Wow, that's really terrible, I can't believe that's happening." To which she replied "oh, you don't care, you're a white male, you'll never have to deal with any of this stuff." This really upset me that she generalized me with the rest of the population, so I admit I mishandled things and raised my voice a little at her and said "that's not true! I do care about this! We talked about it last night." Her reply: "Oh now you're angry at me, but I would never know how you're feeling about this, because everything is just positive and perfect for you. You'll never know what me and other women have to go through!" I apologized for raising my voice to her, told her again that while I don't know what it's like, I do care about how things aren't easy for women in this position, but I didn't appreciate how she was generalizing my feelings just because I'm a white male, and she stormed off, saying that she didn't want to have me yell at her anymore.

I'm not really sure how to move forward with this. I'll admit that I raised my voice at her when I shouldn't have, but it bothered me that she generazlied my feelings and opinions just because I'm a white male. Similarly, the issue about me not feeling strongly reared it's head again, and while I've gotten better at voicing my opinions and feelings, it seems like she's mad at me because I'm not wearing my emotions on my sleeve like she is. What should I do?

Divorce.

And find a sensitive, sensible soul out there -- there's billions.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Woman here. Sorry your wife is nut case. I personally do not believe Fords statements, and stand behind Kavanaugh. It’s disgusting that his reputation is tarnished after a 36 year old accusation that’s isn’t credible. There were too many holes in her story, and her own lifelong friend said it never happened. This was paid for by the dems to delay process until the mid-election votes.

+ 1. I don’t buy her story either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m married to a Kavanaugh and trump supporter and can’t stand him.

I wish I was married to one. Female conservative with a brain. Actual SA survivor. Not anti-men. Fear for the young men in this country with so many women labeling any man that even smiles at them a “sexual predator”.

Can’t be hard to find what you’re looking for these days - they’re all getting divorced! Maybe you can try for Don Jr.?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Woman here. Sorry your wife is nut case. I personally do not believe Fords statements, and stand behind Kavanaugh. It’s disgusting that his reputation is tarnished after a 36 year old accusation that’s isn’t credible. There were too many holes in her story, and her own lifelong friend said it never happened. This was paid for by the dems to delay process until the mid-election votes.

Too bad he doesn’t want a thorough investigation where his buddy Judge is actually questioned under oath! It’s amazing how he doesn’t want due process for himself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm just over here wondering if it had been Merrick Garland's confirmation hearing and these same allegations were brought against him, how many of you would be so triggered?

Oh how fun, some hypothetical whataboutism to minimize people's pain here. Aren't you so clever!

Also, Merrick Garland isn't some idiot blackout drunk frat boy - and ALSO HE NEVER HAD A HEARING thanks to McTurtle. So I guess we'll just never know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m married to a Kavanaugh and trump supporter and can’t stand him.

I wish I was married to one. Female conservative with a brain. Actual SA survivor. Not anti-men. Fear for the young men in this country with so many women labeling any man that even smiles at them a “sexual predator”.

Can’t be hard to find what you’re looking for these days - they’re all getting divorced! Maybe you can try for Don Jr.?

+1 If my DW started going on and on about the patriarchy and starting sentences with "white men" this and that, I'd file ASAP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm just over here wondering if it had been Merrick Garland's confirmation hearing and these same allegations were brought against him, how many of you would be so triggered?

Oh how fun, some hypothetical whataboutism to minimize people's pain here. Aren't you so clever!

Also, Merrick Garland isn't some idiot blackout drunk frat boy - and ALSO HE NEVER HAD A HEARING thanks to McTurtle. So I guess we'll just never know.

"Whattaboutism" is the new racism. My God, you people need to get the F over yourselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m married to a Kavanaugh and trump supporter and can’t stand him.

I wish I was married to one. Female conservative with a brain. Actual SA survivor. Not anti-men. Fear for the young men in this country with so many women labeling any man that even smiles at them a “sexual predator”.

I guess you think most females are brainless then since most females aren't Rs, especially the educated ones. But ok.

I have a DD and DS. I fear for women in this country too because clearly, men can still assault them and get away with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m married to a Kavanaugh and trump supporter and can’t stand him.

I wish I was married to one. Female conservative with a brain. Actual SA survivor. Not anti-men. Fear for the young men in this country with so many women labeling any man that even smiles at them a “sexual predator”.

Can’t be hard to find what you’re looking for these days - they’re all getting divorced! Maybe you can try for Don Jr.?

+1 If my DW started going on and on about the patriarchy and starting sentences with "white men" this and that, I'd file ASAP.

Yeah, it's a downward spiral from there. If "white men" is used disparagingly and a woman associates a husband with that group, look out. Either go to counseling asap, put your foot down, or start taking steps for separation.