Frustrated with preferential treatment

[Anonymous]

Try to keep in mind that volunteering is something you're supposed to do for the benefit of others, not for what you and your kid can get out of it.

If you want to help your community, there are plenty of options. This post, however, makes it seem like you view being a room mom as some sort of perk, and you're not really interested in helping the class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I may, I'm a member of a PTA at what would be considered a well regarded school. I've never been, or applied to be, a room parent, so I can't speak to how that process works. What I can tell you is that if you want to get involved, the PTA is a great avenue to do so. After the first meeting, it ends up being the same handful of people, and they always need an extra set of hands for various events.

I don't think there are any benefits to it that I can see, not what's been described. I had one instance where I requested my child be placed in the same class as another child because they were friends and worked well together. I didn't request a specific teacher. The kids got placed in the same class. But that form is sent to everyone at the end of the year, I didn't specifically request it, nor did I say that I was making the request as an involved member of the PTA or anything of the sort. My child is in one of those academic competitions that has limited spaces available. Again, I didn't advertise that I volunteer for the school, my kid got picked but I wasn't pulling any strings that I was aware of. No secretive phone calls from the administration, nothing like that.

Point is, if you want to be involved, get involved with the PTA. Just about every PTA could use more help. If you wind up getting picked to be a room parent later, you can tell yourself that it was because of joining. And who knows, there might be something to being a known commodity. Even if you don't get chosen, at least you'll be helping the school.

I don't think OP is someone who doesn't know how to get involved. I think OP's just frustrated with the poor behavior of some at the school. Just because there are other opportunities, doesn't make this behavior ok.

No, OP is frustrated she’s not getting exactly what she wants at exactly the moment she wants it.

No, she's saying people aren't playing fairly.

She’s making that assumption because she refuses to believe it’s possible for her to not get what she wants unless someone else is cheating.

This statement below is an example that shows directly the teacher and this other parent not playing fairly, not OP making an assumption. Both because the parent was not the first to sign up and because the parent is already room parent in another class and was the year before. That shows preferential treatment, not some assumption on OP's part.

OP here. To give an example last year I was the first parent to fill in the sheet for a Room parent position (while signing up you see how many slots of each position are available and filled). After waiting for any intimation/email and not receiving anything back from the teacher, got to know from my DD that another parent was already made the room parent. This individual signed up after I did, but apparently is always the room parent in all her kids classes. I would definitely consider this preferential treatment. How is it not so? What are the odds the same parent gets to be the room parent for all of her kids' classes - all 3 classes, year after year.

Did you read OP and then skip to the last page? Your assertion has already been addressed. Repeatedly. You are adding nothing to he discussion.

No, I read through the entire thread. Where does it explain that this parent and teacher we're acting fairly? I'm not buying the argument that the teacher needs the same person year after year. It's a sign up. That was the only explanation I saw.

Fine, this week you get to be line leader, but next week is Larla's turn and you have to be the caboose.

That's why we teach this, no?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Try to keep in mind that volunteering is something you're supposed to do for the benefit of others, not for what you and your kid can get out of it.

If you want to help your community, there are plenty of options. This post, however, makes it seem like you view being a room mom as some sort of perk, and you're not really interested in helping the class.

There is nothing wrong with volunteering being mutually beneficial.

[Anonymous]

I have never had any reason to think getting picked to be RP (which in my experience is not really a desired position) has any relation to the PTA. The teachers chose how they see fit. OP is making an sumptuous about fairness and preferential treatment at a new school, so after a few weeks there?

I’ve never offered to be RP but volunteer regularly at school because I know they are so happy to have help. OP reminds me of a mom at my child’s school who, in discussing volunteering at the school, told me she tried volunteering to help with a class (art? STEM? library? I forget.) and wouldn’t do it again because she had to help other students, and didn’t get to help and work with her own child. I agreed she shouldn’t volunteer again. Silently adding that the point isn’t to hang out with your kid, you are there to help the teacher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I may, I'm a member of a PTA at what would be considered a well regarded school. I've never been, or applied to be, a room parent, so I can't speak to how that process works. What I can tell you is that if you want to get involved, the PTA is a great avenue to do so. After the first meeting, it ends up being the same handful of people, and they always need an extra set of hands for various events.

I don't think there are any benefits to it that I can see, not what's been described. I had one instance where I requested my child be placed in the same class as another child because they were friends and worked well together. I didn't request a specific teacher. The kids got placed in the same class. But that form is sent to everyone at the end of the year, I didn't specifically request it, nor did I say that I was making the request as an involved member of the PTA or anything of the sort. My child is in one of those academic competitions that has limited spaces available. Again, I didn't advertise that I volunteer for the school, my kid got picked but I wasn't pulling any strings that I was aware of. No secretive phone calls from the administration, nothing like that.

Point is, if you want to be involved, get involved with the PTA. Just about every PTA could use more help. If you wind up getting picked to be a room parent later, you can tell yourself that it was because of joining. And who knows, there might be something to being a known commodity. Even if you don't get chosen, at least you'll be helping the school.

I don't think OP is someone who doesn't know how to get involved. I think OP's just frustrated with the poor behavior of some at the school. Just because there are other opportunities, doesn't make this behavior ok.

No, OP is frustrated she’s not getting exactly what she wants at exactly the moment she wants it.

No, she's saying people aren't playing fairly.

She’s making that assumption because she refuses to believe it’s possible for her to not get what she wants unless someone else is cheating.

This statement below is an example that shows directly the teacher and this other parent not playing fairly, not OP making an assumption. Both because the parent was not the first to sign up and because the parent is already room parent in another class and was the year before. That shows preferential treatment, not some assumption on OP's part.

OP here. To give an example last year I was the first parent to fill in the sheet for a Room parent position (while signing up you see how many slots of each position are available and filled). After waiting for any intimation/email and not receiving anything back from the teacher, got to know from my DD that another parent was already made the room parent. This individual signed up after I did, but apparently is always the room parent in all her kids classes. I would definitely consider this preferential treatment. How is it not so? What are the odds the same parent gets to be the room parent for all of her kids' classes - all 3 classes, year after year.

Did you read OP and then skip to the last page? Your assertion has already been addressed. Repeatedly. You are adding nothing to he discussion.

No, I read through the entire thread. Where does it explain that this parent and teacher we're acting fairly? I'm not buying the argument that the teacher needs the same person year after year. It's a sign up. That was the only explanation I saw.

Fine, this week you get to be line leader, but next week is Larla's turn and you have to be the caboose.

That's why we teach this, no?

No, they do that in kindergarten because children are too young to start getting into assignments based on things like prior experience, skills and trust of the community.

[Anonymous]

Elementary school is going to be a long and difficult road OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I may, I'm a member of a PTA at what would be considered a well regarded school. I've never been, or applied to be, a room parent, so I can't speak to how that process works. What I can tell you is that if you want to get involved, the PTA is a great avenue to do so. After the first meeting, it ends up being the same handful of people, and they always need an extra set of hands for various events.

I don't think there are any benefits to it that I can see, not what's been described. I had one instance where I requested my child be placed in the same class as another child because they were friends and worked well together. I didn't request a specific teacher. The kids got placed in the same class. But that form is sent to everyone at the end of the year, I didn't specifically request it, nor did I say that I was making the request as an involved member of the PTA or anything of the sort. My child is in one of those academic competitions that has limited spaces available. Again, I didn't advertise that I volunteer for the school, my kid got picked but I wasn't pulling any strings that I was aware of. No secretive phone calls from the administration, nothing like that.

Point is, if you want to be involved, get involved with the PTA. Just about every PTA could use more help. If you wind up getting picked to be a room parent later, you can tell yourself that it was because of joining. And who knows, there might be something to being a known commodity. Even if you don't get chosen, at least you'll be helping the school.

I don't think OP is someone who doesn't know how to get involved. I think OP's just frustrated with the poor behavior of some at the school. Just because there are other opportunities, doesn't make this behavior ok.

No, OP is frustrated she’s not getting exactly what she wants at exactly the moment she wants it.

No, she's saying people aren't playing fairly.

She’s making that assumption because she refuses to believe it’s possible for her to not get what she wants unless someone else is cheating.

This statement below is an example that shows directly the teacher and this other parent not playing fairly, not OP making an assumption. Both because the parent was not the first to sign up and because the parent is already room parent in another class and was the year before. That shows preferential treatment, not some assumption on OP's part.

OP here. To give an example last year I was the first parent to fill in the sheet for a Room parent position (while signing up you see how many slots of each position are available and filled). After waiting for any intimation/email and not receiving anything back from the teacher, got to know from my DD that another parent was already made the room parent. This individual signed up after I did, but apparently is always the room parent in all her kids classes. I would definitely consider this preferential treatment. How is it not so? What are the odds the same parent gets to be the room parent for all of her kids' classes - all 3 classes, year after year.

Did you read OP and then skip to the last page? Your assertion has already been addressed. Repeatedly. You are adding nothing to he discussion.

No, I read through the entire thread. Where does it explain that this parent and teacher we're acting fairly? I'm not buying the argument that the teacher needs the same person year after year. It's a sign up. That was the only explanation I saw.

Fine, this week you get to be line leader, but next week is Larla's turn and you have to be the caboose.

That's why we teach this, no?

No, they do that in kindergarten because children are too young to start getting into assignments based on things like prior experience, skills and trust of the community.

Prior experience, skills and trust of the community? You do not need these things to be a room parent. Sorry. Try again.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I may, I'm a member of a PTA at what would be considered a well regarded school. I've never been, or applied to be, a room parent, so I can't speak to how that process works. What I can tell you is that if you want to get involved, the PTA is a great avenue to do so. After the first meeting, it ends up being the same handful of people, and they always need an extra set of hands for various events.

I don't think there are any benefits to it that I can see, not what's been described. I had one instance where I requested my child be placed in the same class as another child because they were friends and worked well together. I didn't request a specific teacher. The kids got placed in the same class. But that form is sent to everyone at the end of the year, I didn't specifically request it, nor did I say that I was making the request as an involved member of the PTA or anything of the sort. My child is in one of those academic competitions that has limited spaces available. Again, I didn't advertise that I volunteer for the school, my kid got picked but I wasn't pulling any strings that I was aware of. No secretive phone calls from the administration, nothing like that.

Point is, if you want to be involved, get involved with the PTA. Just about every PTA could use more help. If you wind up getting picked to be a room parent later, you can tell yourself that it was because of joining. And who knows, there might be something to being a known commodity. Even if you don't get chosen, at least you'll be helping the school.

I don't think OP is someone who doesn't know how to get involved. I think OP's just frustrated with the poor behavior of some at the school. Just because there are other opportunities, doesn't make this behavior ok.

No, OP is frustrated she’s not getting exactly what she wants at exactly the moment she wants it.

No, she's saying people aren't playing fairly.

She’s making that assumption because she refuses to believe it’s possible for her to not get what she wants unless someone else is cheating.

This statement below is an example that shows directly the teacher and this other parent not playing fairly, not OP making an assumption. Both because the parent was not the first to sign up and because the parent is already room parent in another class and was the year before. That shows preferential treatment, not some assumption on OP's part.

OP here. To give an example last year I was the first parent to fill in the sheet for a Room parent position (while signing up you see how many slots of each position are available and filled). After waiting for any intimation/email and not receiving anything back from the teacher, got to know from my DD that another parent was already made the room parent. This individual signed up after I did, but apparently is always the room parent in all her kids classes. I would definitely consider this preferential treatment. How is it not so? What are the odds the same parent gets to be the room parent for all of her kids' classes - all 3 classes, year after year.

Did you read OP and then skip to the last page? Your assertion has already been addressed. Repeatedly. You are adding nothing to he discussion.

No, I read through the entire thread. Where does it explain that this parent and teacher we're acting fairly? I'm not buying the argument that the teacher needs the same person year after year. It's a sign up. That was the only explanation I saw.

Fine, this week you get to be line leader, but next week is Larla's turn and you have to be the caboose.

That's why we teach this, no?

No, they do that in kindergarten because children are too young to start getting into assignments based on things like prior experience, skills and trust of the community.

Prior experience, skills and trust of the community? You do not need these things to be a room parent. Sorry. Try again.

If a teacher has two volunteers, one who has been a room parent in the past, did a great job organizing parties and stuff without those teachers needing to take on any of the work and handled class monetary contributions without incident or complaint, and the other being a total unknown to you, which one is the safer bet if you want to have a smooth school year?

I swear, I wonder if the people who don't understand this have ever held a job where they supervised others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I may, I'm a member of a PTA at what would be considered a well regarded school. I've never been, or applied to be, a room parent, so I can't speak to how that process works. What I can tell you is that if you want to get involved, the PTA is a great avenue to do so. After the first meeting, it ends up being the same handful of people, and they always need an extra set of hands for various events.

I don't think there are any benefits to it that I can see, not what's been described. I had one instance where I requested my child be placed in the same class as another child because they were friends and worked well together. I didn't request a specific teacher. The kids got placed in the same class. But that form is sent to everyone at the end of the year, I didn't specifically request it, nor did I say that I was making the request as an involved member of the PTA or anything of the sort. My child is in one of those academic competitions that has limited spaces available. Again, I didn't advertise that I volunteer for the school, my kid got picked but I wasn't pulling any strings that I was aware of. No secretive phone calls from the administration, nothing like that.

Point is, if you want to be involved, get involved with the PTA. Just about every PTA could use more help. If you wind up getting picked to be a room parent later, you can tell yourself that it was because of joining. And who knows, there might be something to being a known commodity. Even if you don't get chosen, at least you'll be helping the school.

I don't think OP is someone who doesn't know how to get involved. I think OP's just frustrated with the poor behavior of some at the school. Just because there are other opportunities, doesn't make this behavior ok.

No, OP is frustrated she’s not getting exactly what she wants at exactly the moment she wants it.

No, she's saying people aren't playing fairly.

She’s making that assumption because she refuses to believe it’s possible for her to not get what she wants unless someone else is cheating.

This statement below is an example that shows directly the teacher and this other parent not playing fairly, not OP making an assumption. Both because the parent was not the first to sign up and because the parent is already room parent in another class and was the year before. That shows preferential treatment, not some assumption on OP's part.

OP here. To give an example last year I was the first parent to fill in the sheet for a Room parent position (while signing up you see how many slots of each position are available and filled). After waiting for any intimation/email and not receiving anything back from the teacher, got to know from my DD that another parent was already made the room parent. This individual signed up after I did, but apparently is always the room parent in all her kids classes. I would definitely consider this preferential treatment. How is it not so? What are the odds the same parent gets to be the room parent for all of her kids' classes - all 3 classes, year after year.

Did you read OP and then skip to the last page? Your assertion has already been addressed. Repeatedly. You are adding nothing to he discussion.

No, I read through the entire thread. Where does it explain that this parent and teacher we're acting fairly? I'm not buying the argument that the teacher needs the same person year after year. It's a sign up. That was the only explanation I saw.

Fine, this week you get to be line leader, but next week is Larla's turn and you have to be the caboose.

That's why we teach this, no?

No, they do that in kindergarten because children are too young to start getting into assignments based on things like prior experience, skills and trust of the community.

Prior experience, skills and trust of the community? You do not need these things to be a room parent. Sorry. Try again.

If a teacher has two volunteers, one who has been a room parent in the past, did a great job organizing parties and stuff without those teachers needing to take on any of the work and handled class monetary contributions without incident or complaint, and the other being a total unknown to you, which one is the safer bet if you want to have a smooth school year?

I swear, I wonder if the people who don't understand this have ever held a job where they supervised others.

You are making way too much of this job. People change volunteer roles all the time often without experience. In the workforce, people come into roles where they need to take ownership of other's work or do work they don't have prior experience on. Our PTA president just took on a role where she was given no information from the previous year. It can be done. If the teacher doesn't want to offer the job to any parent, they shouldn't have a sign up list. It's that simple. It's a role where people plan class parties and collect money for a teacher's gift. There is no accountability beyond making sure the money is spent on the parties and gifts. And there is no interview process, background check or liability even during the party. If an issue comes up during the party, the school is liable, not the volunteer.

I wonder if you've ever had a volunteer role before or a real job for that matter.

We teach kids how to share in kindergarten, because it's an important part of living in society and we want them to take on new roles and challenge themselves. That is why Larla isn't always the line leader.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I may, I'm a member of a PTA at what would be considered a well regarded school. I've never been, or applied to be, a room parent, so I can't speak to how that process works. What I can tell you is that if you want to get involved, the PTA is a great avenue to do so. After the first meeting, it ends up being the same handful of people, and they always need an extra set of hands for various events.

I don't think there are any benefits to it that I can see, not what's been described. I had one instance where I requested my child be placed in the same class as another child because they were friends and worked well together. I didn't request a specific teacher. The kids got placed in the same class. But that form is sent to everyone at the end of the year, I didn't specifically request it, nor did I say that I was making the request as an involved member of the PTA or anything of the sort. My child is in one of those academic competitions that has limited spaces available. Again, I didn't advertise that I volunteer for the school, my kid got picked but I wasn't pulling any strings that I was aware of. No secretive phone calls from the administration, nothing like that.

Point is, if you want to be involved, get involved with the PTA. Just about every PTA could use more help. If you wind up getting picked to be a room parent later, you can tell yourself that it was because of joining. And who knows, there might be something to being a known commodity. Even if you don't get chosen, at least you'll be helping the school.

I don't think OP is someone who doesn't know how to get involved. I think OP's just frustrated with the poor behavior of some at the school. Just because there are other opportunities, doesn't make this behavior ok.

No, OP is frustrated she’s not getting exactly what she wants at exactly the moment she wants it.

No, she's saying people aren't playing fairly.

She’s making that assumption because she refuses to believe it’s possible for her to not get what she wants unless someone else is cheating.

This statement below is an example that shows directly the teacher and this other parent not playing fairly, not OP making an assumption. Both because the parent was not the first to sign up and because the parent is already room parent in another class and was the year before. That shows preferential treatment, not some assumption on OP's part.

OP here. To give an example last year I was the first parent to fill in the sheet for a Room parent position (while signing up you see how many slots of each position are available and filled). After waiting for any intimation/email and not receiving anything back from the teacher, got to know from my DD that another parent was already made the room parent. This individual signed up after I did, but apparently is always the room parent in all her kids classes. I would definitely consider this preferential treatment. How is it not so? What are the odds the same parent gets to be the room parent for all of her kids' classes - all 3 classes, year after year.

Did you read OP and then skip to the last page? Your assertion has already been addressed. Repeatedly. You are adding nothing to he discussion.

No, I read through the entire thread. Where does it explain that this parent and teacher we're acting fairly? I'm not buying the argument that the teacher needs the same person year after year. It's a sign up. That was the only explanation I saw.

Fine, this week you get to be line leader, but next week is Larla's turn and you have to be the caboose.

That's why we teach this, no?

No, they do that in kindergarten because children are too young to start getting into assignments based on things like prior experience, skills and trust of the community.

Prior experience, skills and trust of the community? You do not need these things to be a room parent. Sorry. Try again.

If a teacher has two volunteers, one who has been a room parent in the past, did a great job organizing parties and stuff without those teachers needing to take on any of the work and handled class monetary contributions without incident or complaint, and the other being a total unknown to you, which one is the safer bet if you want to have a smooth school year?

I swear, I wonder if the people who don't understand this have ever held a job where they supervised others.

You are making way too much of this job. People change volunteer roles all the time often without experience. In the workforce, people come into roles where they need to take ownership of other's work or do work they don't have prior experience on. Our PTA president just took on a role where she was given no information from the previous year. It can be done. If the teacher doesn't want to offer the job to any parent, they shouldn't have a sign up list. It's that simple. It's a role where people plan class parties and collect money for a teacher's gift. There is no accountability beyond making sure the money is spent on the parties and gifts. And there is no interview process, background check or liability even during the party. If an issue comes up during the party, the school is liable, not the volunteer.

I wonder if you've ever had a volunteer role before or a real job for that matter.

We teach kids how to share in kindergarten, because it's an important part of living in society and we want them to take on new roles and challenge themselves. That is why Larla isn't always the line leader.

No, you're actually the one making too much about this. I'm talking about a teacher looking at a sign-up list and thinking, "Larla Smith, hmm, who's parent is that again? Oh, Jane Jones, she ran the book fair last year. I hear she's great, I'll email her first." A teacher has no investment in helping a parent "take on new roles and challenge themselves," nor is that appropriate to ask of them. They're looking for the volunteer who will hopefully make the year easiest for them, because their appropriate role is teaching and developing children, not their parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Try to keep in mind that volunteering is something you're supposed to do for the benefit of others, not for what you and your kid can get out of it.

If you want to help your community, there are plenty of options. This post, however, makes it seem like you view being a room mom as some sort of perk, and you're not really interested in helping the class.

There is nothing wrong with volunteering being mutually beneficial.

Nothing wrong with it at all. But the position is for the benefit of the kids, not the room parent.

[Anonymous]

If a teacher has two volunteers, one who has been a room parent in the past, did a great job organizing parties and stuff without those teachers needing to take on any of the work and handled class monetary contributions without incident or complaint, and the other being a total unknown to you, which one is the safer bet if you want to have a smooth school year?

I swear, I wonder if the people who don't understand this have ever held a job where they supervised others.

Yes, this. I am in charge of a large number of school volunteers. Some are um, shall we say, easier to supervise than others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If I may, I'm a member of a PTA at what would be considered a well regarded school. I've never been, or applied to be, a room parent, so I can't speak to how that process works. What I can tell you is that if you want to get involved, the PTA is a great avenue to do so. After the first meeting, it ends up being the same handful of people, and they always need an extra set of hands for various events.

I don't think there are any benefits to it that I can see, not what's been described. I had one instance where I requested my child be placed in the same class as another child because they were friends and worked well together. I didn't request a specific teacher. The kids got placed in the same class. But that form is sent to everyone at the end of the year, I didn't specifically request it, nor did I say that I was making the request as an involved member of the PTA or anything of the sort. My child is in one of those academic competitions that has limited spaces available. Again, I didn't advertise that I volunteer for the school, my kid got picked but I wasn't pulling any strings that I was aware of. No secretive phone calls from the administration, nothing like that.

Point is, if you want to be involved, get involved with the PTA. Just about every PTA could use more help. If you wind up getting picked to be a room parent later, you can tell yourself that it was because of joining. And who knows, there might be something to being a known commodity. Even if you don't get chosen, at least you'll be helping the school.

I don't think OP is someone who doesn't know how to get involved. I think OP's just frustrated with the poor behavior of some at the school. Just because there are other opportunities, doesn't make this behavior ok.

No, OP is frustrated she’s not getting exactly what she wants at exactly the moment she wants it.

No, she's saying people aren't playing fairly.

She’s making that assumption because she refuses to believe it’s possible for her to not get what she wants unless someone else is cheating.

This statement below is an example that shows directly the teacher and this other parent not playing fairly, not OP making an assumption. Both because the parent was not the first to sign up and because the parent is already room parent in another class and was the year before. That shows preferential treatment, not some assumption on OP's part.

OP here. To give an example last year I was the first parent to fill in the sheet for a Room parent position (while signing up you see how many slots of each position are available and filled). After waiting for any intimation/email and not receiving anything back from the teacher, got to know from my DD that another parent was already made the room parent. This individual signed up after I did, but apparently is always the room parent in all her kids classes. I would definitely consider this preferential treatment. How is it not so? What are the odds the same parent gets to be the room parent for all of her kids' classes - all 3 classes, year after year.

Did you read OP and then skip to the last page? Your assertion has already been addressed. Repeatedly. You are adding nothing to he discussion.

No, I read through the entire thread. Where does it explain that this parent and teacher we're acting fairly? I'm not buying the argument that the teacher needs the same person year after year. It's a sign up. That was the only explanation I saw.

Fine, this week you get to be line leader, but next week is Larla's turn and you have to be the caboose.

That's why we teach this, no?

No, they do that in kindergarten because children are too young to start getting into assignments based on things like prior experience, skills and trust of the community.

Prior experience, skills and trust of the community? You do not need these things to be a room parent. Sorry. Try again.

If a teacher has two volunteers, one who has been a room parent in the past, did a great job organizing parties and stuff without those teachers needing to take on any of the work and handled class monetary contributions without incident or complaint, and the other being a total unknown to you, which one is the safer bet if you want to have a smooth school year?

I swear, I wonder if the people who don't understand this have ever held a job where they supervised others.

You are making way too much of this job. People change volunteer roles all the time often without experience. In the workforce, people come into roles where they need to take ownership of other's work or do work they don't have prior experience on. Our PTA president just took on a role where she was given no information from the previous year. It can be done. If the teacher doesn't want to offer the job to any parent, they shouldn't have a sign up list. It's that simple. It's a role where people plan class parties and collect money for a teacher's gift. There is no accountability beyond making sure the money is spent on the parties and gifts. And there is no interview process, background check or liability even during the party. If an issue comes up during the party, the school is liable, not the volunteer.

I wonder if you've ever had a volunteer role before or a real job for that matter.

We teach kids how to share in kindergarten, because it's an important part of living in society and we want them to take on new roles and challenge themselves. That is why Larla isn't always the line leader.

No, you're actually the one making too much about this. I'm talking about a teacher looking at a sign-up list and thinking, "Larla Smith, hmm, who's parent is that again? Oh, Jane Jones, she ran the book fair last year. I hear she's great, I'll email her first." A teacher has no investment in helping a parent "take on new roles and challenge themselves," nor is that appropriate to ask of them. They're looking for the volunteer who will hopefully make the year easiest for them, because their appropriate role is teaching and developing children, not their parents.

No, I really am not. If you want to have a school where all parents feel welcome and engaged in the school along with their children, it is not healthy to rely on just a few key volunteers. Our school has always contacted the first person to sign up to be part of the committee. Ours is a room parent committee and the committee decides who the head is, not the teacher. I'm not OP. Based on experience, I know this system can work without the teacher deciding the lead room parent. If the teacher needs to have Jane Jones run a particular volunteer position, whatever that may be, then she should contact Jane Jones first for her availability before asking anyone to volunteer. Sometimes Jane Jones moves and then what? There's no reason to assume that Larla Smith can't do the volunteer job as good or better than Jane Jones just because this is Jane's 3rd kid. Now if Larla Smith has caused problems in the past, then yes, I can understand the teacher having some misgivings. An honest teacher though would offer Larla some other opportunity to help out in a different way or be frank with Larla about why she can't fulfill the volunteer role. Again we are talking about the room parent position, not the assistant to the principal. I've never heard of an issue with the room parent. It's a pretty easy job and I bet Jane Jones had some issues her first go round as room parent in kindergarten with her first child.

Someone expressed surprise why some parents want to be room parents. This position allows parents have better access to teachers, possibly the school day with their child, and potentially more influence on the school or their child, whatever their motivation is. Sometimes it's part of resume building. Sometimes it's what a parent thinks they are good at and most useful. There's a reason why Jane Jones wants to continue being room parent for her 3rd kid for the 12th year in a row just like Larla Smith wants to try it out for her first.

[Anonymous]

13:31 Also, our school has a room parent book for every grade with explicit instructions for each party throughout the year. There are some options available but the general gist, budget, and timeframe of the parties are already outlined in the book. Just in case Jane Jones moves or decides not to be room parent next year. Perhaps this is a solution for schools and teachers that feel worried about a new volunteer coming in as room parent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:13:31 Also, our school has a room parent book for every grade with explicit instructions for each party throughout the year. There are some options available but the general gist, budget, and timeframe of the parties are already outlined in the book. Just in case Jane Jones moves or decides not to be room parent next year. Perhaps this is a solution for schools and teachers that feel worried about a new volunteer coming in as room parent.

Hmm, I wonder what your school wasn't doing with all the time spent writing a book, a literal book, to tell parents how to organize a Halloween party.