Frustrated with preferential treatment

[Anonymous]

Hey, anything that keeps the parents in check is a good thing!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:13:31 Also, our school has a room parent book for every grade with explicit instructions for each party throughout the year. There are some options available but the general gist, budget, and timeframe of the parties are already outlined in the book. Just in case Jane Jones moves or decides not to be room parent next year. Perhaps this is a solution for schools and teachers that feel worried about a new volunteer coming in as room parent.

Hmm, I wonder what your school wasn't doing with all the time spent writing a book, a literal book, to tell parents how to organize a Halloween party.

It's a bunch of papers put into a binder with protective sleeves which is also scanned online. I think there are 1 to 3 sheets per grade. Ancient Civilization Day may take up it's own page. I think it's helpful to have from year to year. No need to recreate the wheel for each year's Halloween party. We do this for PTA committee documents too. The only communication between the teacher and the parents on the party is about the date and time and a few incidental emails on supplies a week or two prior. There is no need for a teacher to have some big trusting relationship with the room parent team. We haven't had a problem with a party yet and we allow everyone who signs up to participate.

[Anonymous]

Who signs up for room parent to challenge themselves and pad their resume?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Who signs up for room parent to challenge themselves and pad their resume?

People actually do this. And a lot of them do it as a social outlet to meet other parents.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:If I may, I'm a member of a PTA at what would be considered a well regarded school. I've never been, or applied to be, a room parent, so I can't speak to how that process works. What I can tell you is that if you want to get involved, the PTA is a great avenue to do so. After the first meeting, it ends up being the same handful of people, and they always need an extra set of hands for various events.

I don't think there are any benefits to it that I can see, not what's been described. I had one instance where I requested my child be placed in the same class as another child because they were friends and worked well together. I didn't request a specific teacher. The kids got placed in the same class. But that form is sent to everyone at the end of the year, I didn't specifically request it, nor did I say that I was making the request as an involved member of the PTA or anything of the sort. My child is in one of those academic competitions that has limited spaces available. Again, I didn't advertise that I volunteer for the school, my kid got picked but I wasn't pulling any strings that I was aware of. No secretive phone calls from the administration, nothing like that.

Point is, if you want to be involved, get involved with the PTA. Just about every PTA could use more help. If you wind up getting picked to be a room parent later, you can tell yourself that it was because of joining. And who knows, there might be something to being a known commodity. Even if you don't get chosen, at least you'll be helping the school.

I don't think OP is someone who doesn't know how to get involved. I think OP's just frustrated with the poor behavior of some at the school. Just because there are other opportunities, doesn't make this behavior ok.

No, OP is frustrated she’s not getting exactly what she wants at exactly the moment she wants it.

No, she's saying people aren't playing fairly.

She’s making that assumption because she refuses to believe it’s possible for her to not get what she wants unless someone else is cheating.

This statement below is an example that shows directly the teacher and this other parent not playing fairly, not OP making an assumption. Both because the parent was not the first to sign up and because the parent is already room parent in another class and was the year before. That shows preferential treatment, not some assumption on OP's part.

OP here. To give an example last year I was the first parent to fill in the sheet for a Room parent position (while signing up you see how many slots of each position are available and filled). After waiting for any intimation/email and not receiving anything back from the teacher, got to know from my DD that another parent was already made the room parent. This individual signed up after I did, but apparently is always the room parent in all her kids classes. I would definitely consider this preferential treatment. How is it not so? What are the odds the same parent gets to be the room parent for all of her kids' classes - all 3 classes, year after year.

Did you read OP and then skip to the last page? Your assertion has already been addressed. Repeatedly. You are adding nothing to he discussion.

No, I read through the entire thread. Where does it explain that this parent and teacher we're acting fairly? I'm not buying the argument that the teacher needs the same person year after year. It's a sign up. That was the only explanation I saw.

Fine, this week you get to be line leader, but next week is Larla's turn and you have to be the caboose.

That's why we teach this, no?

No, they do that in kindergarten because children are too young to start getting into assignments based on things like prior experience, skills and trust of the community.

Is this satire? Are you for real???

Now hiring: Room Parent. Must have prior experience, skills, and trust of the community.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Try to keep in mind that volunteering is something you're supposed to do for the benefit of others, not for what you and your kid can get out of it.

If you want to help your community, there are plenty of options. This post, however, makes it seem like you view being a room mom as some sort of perk, and you're not really interested in helping the class.

+1.

[Anonymous]

It's not the teacher's job to make opportunities for parents to "help" at school in order to assist parents in cultivating a social life with other parents at school, or to boost a parent's self-esteem, or to help the parent gain skills for a resume.

[Anonymous]

Whoever does sign up to be room parents, regardless of their motivations, are patient people. I've been in to mystery read a few times over the year to my kids K classes, and my God, I would not want to be in there on a regular basis. K teachers are saints.

[Anonymous]

This is one of the most amusing threads I have ever read.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who signs up for room parent to challenge themselves and pad their resume?

People actually do this. And a lot of them do it as a social outlet to meet other parents.

OMG. How about signing up to be a room parent because you just want to be helpful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Who signs up for room parent to challenge themselves and pad their resume?

People actually do this. And a lot of them do it as a social outlet to meet other parents.

OMG. How about signing up to be a room parent because you just want to be helpful.

For all your kids for all their years in school and not allowing others to take over because you and the teach have a relationship? I don't thinks so.

[Anonymous]

Teachers have a good intuition for who's volunteering to actually help and who's just interested in social climbing or expects tit-for-tat. Maybe that's why OP didn't get picked.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Teachers have a good intuition for who's volunteering to actually help and who's just interested in social climbing or expects tit-for-tat. Maybe that's why OP didn't get picked.

Obviously they all don't. Many posts are on here about teachers giving preferential treatment to parents and students.... If you know nothing about OP, why would you even assume that? Why would you make an assumption? What has OP said other than she's annoyed the same parents always get picked to make you think she's someone who a teacher should not pick out of the box?

Like the teachers always say. Support your opinion with actual evidence.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^^^ If she cant give me three minutes of her time, why should I give her $200 of mine? I agree it’s probably a bit petty but oh well. I wanted it to go to someone who appreciated it.

Seriously?!?! Seriously? She has probably 25 students! Do you have ANY concept of how much work she has to do every single afternoon the first few weeks of school?!? I wouldn’t claim 3 minutes of a teacher’s time to thank me for actually volunteering at an event around that time of year. You’re expecting an effing thank you just for singing your name in a pice of paper, not actually *doing* anything? It took you literally 3 seconds to write your name and you think the teacher peers you exponentially more effort in return?!?

You are bonkers and I’m sure this teacher would forgo a decade’s worth of card stock to have avoided having you as a room parent. Yikes! The maintenance!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Teachers have a good intuition for who's volunteering to actually help and who's just interested in social climbing or expects tit-for-tat. Maybe that's why OP didn't get picked.

Obviously they all don't. Many posts are on here about teachers giving preferential treatment to parents and students.... If you know nothing about OP, why would you even assume that? Why would you make an assumption? What has OP said other than she's annoyed the same parents always get picked to make you think she's someone who a teacher should not pick out of the box?

Like the teachers always say. Support your opinion with actual evidence.

Actually, what you have here is a bunch of people speculating that people who are room parents get a whole bunch of special treatment. I don't think anyone has posted in this thread that they were a room parent and got special treatment because of it. You're not insightful, you're paranoid.