DS starting to act like a gay, is this just a phase?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, sorry about all of these God damn no-balls liberal cowards always supporting the gays. If I wanna bash the gays, I'm gonna bash the gays. I don't want my son acting like a damn gay, and that's just that. I'm not homophobic though.

This is really funny. Well done.

[Anonymous]

Bless your heart!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you can't say "a gay". It's not correct! You have to say "gay" and you can't call people of an alternative sexual orientation "the gays". Are you insane?

She's a crazy. Or maybe just a dumb. Or an obtuse.

Wait, I've got it. She's a southern, which accounts for all of the above.

You literally have zero class. No wait....negative class.

Take a lap. You're clearly a whiny gay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you can't say "a gay". It's not correct! You have to say "gay" and you can't call people of an alternative sexual orientation "the gays". Are you insane?

She's a crazy. Or maybe just a dumb. Or an obtuse.

Wait, I've got it. She's a southern, which accounts for all of the above.

You literally have zero class. No wait....negative class.

Take a lap. You're clearly a whiny gay.

I posted this. Just want to clarify something. Calling someone "a gay" or "the gays" is not homophobic. It just proves your liberal insecurity. You call me a straight and I guarantee I won't think anything of it. It's because I'm secure enough with myself to not get offended about petty things... Or maybe it's just because I have a touch of class, unlike you whiny crybabies blatantly insulting geographic regions of the US.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, you can't say "a gay". It's not correct! You have to say "gay" and you can't call people of an alternative sexual orientation "the gays". Are you insane?

She's a crazy. Or maybe just a dumb. Or an obtuse.

Wait, I've got it. She's a southern, which accounts for all of the above.

You literally have zero class. No wait....negative class.

Take a lap. You're clearly a whiny gay.

I posted this. Just want to clarify something. Calling someone "a gay" or "the gays" is not homophobic. It just proves your liberal insecurity. You call me a straight and I guarantee I won't think anything of it. It's because I'm secure enough with myself to not get offended about petty things... Or maybe it's just because I have a touch of class, unlike you whiny crybabies blatantly insulting geographic regions of the US.

Hon, you're overreaching -- that's why we know you're a troll. If you want to be a successful troll on this board, you have to wrap yourself in artificial concern tinged with condescension. Trolling by calling people liberal crybabies is only successful on the Politics board.

Don't worry -- summer only just started. I'm sure you'll get better with practice.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand why most of the posters on here are deriding OP. OP is genuinely asking for advice and I, like a few others knew when she said 'the gays', she was saying it in that term because of her surroundings.

Might be hard to believe, but there are plenty of people who grow up in America and don't have gay neighbors/friends/family/co-workers and/or not interact with anyone gay.

While being gay is not a choice, I know I would be disappointed to find out if my child were gay. I can't help feeling that way, and I know others would too.

+1. At least 50% those saying it makes no difference to them are lying.

There have been several variations of this sentiment throughout the thread and it's interesting because it really reflects on the people who post these comments, rather than the rest of the community at large. Why is it so hard for you to believe, in this day and age, that many, many (if not most) people in this area really wouldn't be secretly disappointed if their child was gay. Honestly, if my son one day came to me and told me he was gay, my response would probably be along the lines of: I hope you find a nice Jewish man to marry. A doctor would be nice. And would it kill you to call your poor old mother more often. Oy.

Oh, and by the way, your gay son or daughter will definitely be able to pick up on your "secret" disappointment, and it will hurt them far more than any bully is able to. Please keep that in mind.

My disappointment wouldn't be a secret. They would know know about it.

[Anonymous]

OP, if people already commented on your offensive use of "the gays" and "a gay," and told you it was incorrect, why do you create a brand new post, and use this term over and over again? Is it to incite people? The fact that you are a native English speaker makes this all the more ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't understand why most of the posters on here are deriding OP. OP is genuinely asking for advice and I, like a few others knew when she said 'the gays', she was saying it in that term because of her surroundings.

Might be hard to believe, but there are plenty of people who grow up in America and don't have gay neighbors/friends/family/co-workers and/or not interact with anyone gay.

While being gay is not a choice, I know I would be disappointed to find out if my child were gay. I can't help feeling that way, and I know others would too.

+1. At least 50% those saying it makes no difference to them are lying.

There have been several variations of this sentiment throughout the thread and it's interesting because it really reflects on the people who post these comments, rather than the rest of the community at large. Why is it so hard for you to believe, in this day and age, that many, many (if not most) people in this area really wouldn't be secretly disappointed if their child was gay. Honestly, if my son one day came to me and told me he was gay, my response would probably be along the lines of: I hope you find a nice Jewish man to marry. A doctor would be nice. And would it kill you to call your poor old mother more often. Oy.

Oh, and by the way, your gay son or daughter will definitely be able to pick up on your "secret" disappointment, and it will hurt them far more than any bully is able to. Please keep that in mind.

My disappointment wouldn't be a secret. They would know know about it.

That will be your own failing and not you child's.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP - I get what you're saying. I would feel the exact same way you do, if I were in your situation. I actually have a friend whose son is most likely gay. They noticed at a very young age, and finally in elementary school, they decided to work on acceptance. They had to get out of denial, stop wishing for something else, learn how to be supportive, which included helping the child understand his/her sexuality (other kids could be less accepting). With some things, acceptance takes a lot of work and does not come naturally. They sought a pyschologist to help them sort through their (just the parents) feelings, and joined a support group with other parents facing the same situation. Their child does not know they do this (as they don't want the child to think something is wrong with him). They have met many people in their situation who want to "deal" with this in the most positive manner. Some parents come alone as their spouse is either in denial or completely against their child being gay. The boys' parents used to cry a lot about this (even though the very much loved their son). They have come along way, and while they are pretty sure their son is gay, there's the small chance he may not be - they think they are on the right track in learning acceptance now rather than later.

Best post I have read out of all this jibberish. OP, I get it if you are disappointed - we all have certain dreams and expectations of our kids and sometimes (many times), they veer off. I grew up in an environment that had the mindset that being gay was a choice and for the longest time I thought that, until I realized that duh, if being gay was a choice, then there would never be any gay peope because no one loves being bullied, ostracized, disowned from family, losing friends, etc. Best of luck to you and your family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - I get what you're saying. I would feel the exact same way you do, if I were in your situation. I actually have a friend whose son is most likely gay. They noticed at a very young age, and finally in elementary school, they decided to work on acceptance. They had to get out of denial, stop wishing for something else, learn how to be supportive, which included helping the child understand his/her sexuality (other kids could be less accepting). With some things, acceptance takes a lot of work and does not come naturally. They sought a pyschologist to help them sort through their (just the parents) feelings, and joined a support group with other parents facing the same situation. Their child does not know they do this (as they don't want the child to think something is wrong with him). They have met many people in their situation who want to "deal" with this in the most positive manner. Some parents come alone as their spouse is either in denial or completely against their child being gay. The boys' parents used to cry a lot about this (even though the very much loved their son). They have come along way, and while they are pretty sure their son is gay, there's the small chance he may not be - they think they are on the right track in learning acceptance now rather than later.

Best post I have read out of all this jibberish. OP, I get it if you are disappointed - we all have certain dreams and expectations of our kids and sometimes (many times), they veer off. I grew up in an environment that had the mindset that being gay was a choice and for the longest time I thought that, until I realized that duh, if being gay was a choice, then there would never be any gay peope because no one loves being bullied, ostracized, disowned from family, losing friends, etc. Best of luck to you and your family.

But gays do have a choice. The choice is between indulging their sexual preferences (with the consequences that follow from that, as you mention) and sucking it up and living an appearance of a heterosexual life (which many gay people in the history have done). It is a choice between unappealing options to be sure but is a choice nevertheless.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - I get what you're saying. I would feel the exact same way you do, if I were in your situation. I actually have a friend whose son is most likely gay. They noticed at a very young age, and finally in elementary school, they decided to work on acceptance. They had to get out of denial, stop wishing for something else, learn how to be supportive, which included helping the child understand his/her sexuality (other kids could be less accepting). With some things, acceptance takes a lot of work and does not come naturally. They sought a pyschologist to help them sort through their (just the parents) feelings, and joined a support group with other parents facing the same situation. Their child does not know they do this (as they don't want the child to think something is wrong with him). They have met many people in their situation who want to "deal" with this in the most positive manner. Some parents come alone as their spouse is either in denial or completely against their child being gay. The boys' parents used to cry a lot about this (even though the very much loved their son). They have come along way, and while they are pretty sure their son is gay, there's the small chance he may not be - they think they are on the right track in learning acceptance now rather than later.

Best post I have read out of all this jibberish. OP, I get it if you are disappointed - we all have certain dreams and expectations of our kids and sometimes (many times), they veer off. I grew up in an environment that had the mindset that being gay was a choice and for the longest time I thought that, until I realized that duh, if being gay was a choice, then there would never be any gay peope because no one loves being bullied, ostracized, disowned from family, losing friends, etc. Best of luck to you and your family.

But gays do have a choice. The choice is between indulging their sexual preferences (with the consequences that follow from that, as you mention) and sucking it up and living an appearance of a heterosexual life (which many gay people in the history have done). It is a choice between unappealing options to be sure but is a choice nevertheless.

What the hell? Could you suck it up and live your life as a lie? That isn't fair to yourself or your family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - I get what you're saying. I would feel the exact same way you do, if I were in your situation. I actually have a friend whose son is most likely gay. They noticed at a very young age, and finally in elementary school, they decided to work on acceptance. They had to get out of denial, stop wishing for something else, learn how to be supportive, which included helping the child understand his/her sexuality (other kids could be less accepting). With some things, acceptance takes a lot of work and does not come naturally. They sought a pyschologist to help them sort through their (just the parents) feelings, and joined a support group with other parents facing the same situation. Their child does not know they do this (as they don't want the child to think something is wrong with him). They have met many people in their situation who want to "deal" with this in the most positive manner. Some parents come alone as their spouse is either in denial or completely against their child being gay. The boys' parents used to cry a lot about this (even though the very much loved their son). They have come along way, and while they are pretty sure their son is gay, there's the small chance he may not be - they think they are on the right track in learning acceptance now rather than later.

Best post I have read out of all this jibberish. OP, I get it if you are disappointed - we all have certain dreams and expectations of our kids and sometimes (many times), they veer off. I grew up in an environment that had the mindset that being gay was a choice and for the longest time I thought that, until I realized that duh, if being gay was a choice, then there would never be any gay peope because no one loves being bullied, ostracized, disowned from family, losing friends, etc. Best of luck to you and your family.

But gays do have a choice. The choice is between indulging their sexual preferences (with the consequences that follow from that, as you mention) and sucking it up and living an appearance of a heterosexual life (which many gay people in the history have done). It is a choice between unappealing options to be sure but is a choice nevertheless.

What the hell? Could you suck it up and live your life as a lie? That isn't fair to yourself or your family.

Yes, I think I could. It's hard to know those things for sure, but I think I would want to suck it up and I would succeed in doing so. And I were to do it, it wouldn't be a lie. It would be a conscious choice with full awareness of the trade-offs involved. I imagine that close friends would probably know how I feel and how that is different from how I chose to live.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - I get what you're saying. I would feel the exact same way you do, if I were in your situation. I actually have a friend whose son is most likely gay. They noticed at a very young age, and finally in elementary school, they decided to work on acceptance. They had to get out of denial, stop wishing for something else, learn how to be supportive, which included helping the child understand his/her sexuality (other kids could be less accepting). With some things, acceptance takes a lot of work and does not come naturally. They sought a pyschologist to help them sort through their (just the parents) feelings, and joined a support group with other parents facing the same situation. Their child does not know they do this (as they don't want the child to think something is wrong with him). They have met many people in their situation who want to "deal" with this in the most positive manner. Some parents come alone as their spouse is either in denial or completely against their child being gay. The boys' parents used to cry a lot about this (even though the very much loved their son). They have come along way, and while they are pretty sure their son is gay, there's the small chance he may not be - they think they are on the right track in learning acceptance now rather than later.

Best post I have read out of all this jibberish. OP, I get it if you are disappointed - we all have certain dreams and expectations of our kids and sometimes (many times), they veer off. I grew up in an environment that had the mindset that being gay was a choice and for the longest time I thought that, until I realized that duh, if being gay was a choice, then there would never be any gay peope because no one loves being bullied, ostracized, disowned from family, losing friends, etc. Best of luck to you and your family.

But gays do have a choice. The choice is between indulging their sexual preferences (with the consequences that follow from that, as you mention) and sucking it up and living an appearance of a heterosexual life (which many gay people in the history have done). It is a choice between unappealing options to be sure but is a choice nevertheless.

What the hell? Could you suck it up and live your life as a lie? That isn't fair to yourself or your family.

Yes, I think I could. It's hard to know those things for sure, but I think I would want to suck it up and I would succeed in doing so. And I were to do it, it wouldn't be a lie. It would be a conscious choice with full awareness of the trade-offs involved. I imagine that close friends would probably know how I feel and how that is different from how I chose to live.

WHAT??? Are you serious? You have NO idea what you would do or how happy or not you would be. And living the way you want to live is not "indulging your sexual preference" - its being who you are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - I get what you're saying. I would feel the exact same way you do, if I were in your situation. I actually have a friend whose son is most likely gay. They noticed at a very young age, and finally in elementary school, they decided to work on acceptance. They had to get out of denial, stop wishing for something else, learn how to be supportive, which included helping the child understand his/her sexuality (other kids could be less accepting). With some things, acceptance takes a lot of work and does not come naturally. They sought a pyschologist to help them sort through their (just the parents) feelings, and joined a support group with other parents facing the same situation. Their child does not know they do this (as they don't want the child to think something is wrong with him). They have met many people in their situation who want to "deal" with this in the most positive manner. Some parents come alone as their spouse is either in denial or completely against their child being gay. The boys' parents used to cry a lot about this (even though the very much loved their son). They have come along way, and while they are pretty sure their son is gay, there's the small chance he may not be - they think they are on the right track in learning acceptance now rather than later.

Best post I have read out of all this jibberish. OP, I get it if you are disappointed - we all have certain dreams and expectations of our kids and sometimes (many times), they veer off. I grew up in an environment that had the mindset that being gay was a choice and for the longest time I thought that, until I realized that duh, if being gay was a choice, then there would never be any gay peope because no one loves being bullied, ostracized, disowned from family, losing friends, etc. Best of luck to you and your family.

But gays do have a choice. The choice is between indulging their sexual preferences (with the consequences that follow from that, as you mention) and sucking it up and living an appearance of a heterosexual life (which many gay people in the history have done). It is a choice between unappealing options to be sure but is a choice nevertheless.

What the hell? Could you suck it up and live your life as a lie? That isn't fair to yourself or your family.

Yes, I think I could. It's hard to know those things for sure, but I think I would want to suck it up and I would succeed in doing so. And I were to do it, it wouldn't be a lie. It would be a conscious choice with full awareness of the trade-offs involved. I imagine that close friends would probably know how I feel and how that is different from how I chose to live.

How would that not be a lie? Would you tell your opposite sex spouse that you were gay and not attracted to them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP - I get what you're saying. I would feel the exact same way you do, if I were in your situation. I actually have a friend whose son is most likely gay. They noticed at a very young age, and finally in elementary school, they decided to work on acceptance. They had to get out of denial, stop wishing for something else, learn how to be supportive, which included helping the child understand his/her sexuality (other kids could be less accepting). With some things, acceptance takes a lot of work and does not come naturally. They sought a pyschologist to help them sort through their (just the parents) feelings, and joined a support group with other parents facing the same situation. Their child does not know they do this (as they don't want the child to think something is wrong with him). They have met many people in their situation who want to "deal" with this in the most positive manner. Some parents come alone as their spouse is either in denial or completely against their child being gay. The boys' parents used to cry a lot about this (even though the very much loved their son). They have come along way, and while they are pretty sure their son is gay, there's the small chance he may not be - they think they are on the right track in learning acceptance now rather than later.

Best post I have read out of all this jibberish. OP, I get it if you are disappointed - we all have certain dreams and expectations of our kids and sometimes (many times), they veer off. I grew up in an environment that had the mindset that being gay was a choice and for the longest time I thought that, until I realized that duh, if being gay was a choice, then there would never be any gay peope because no one loves being bullied, ostracized, disowned from family, losing friends, etc. Best of luck to you and your family.

But gays do have a choice. The choice is between indulging their sexual preferences (with the consequences that follow from that, as you mention) and sucking it up and living an appearance of a heterosexual life (which many gay people in the history have done). It is a choice between unappealing options to be sure but is a choice nevertheless.

What the hell? Could you suck it up and live your life as a lie? That isn't fair to yourself or your family.

Yes, I think I could. It's hard to know those things for sure, but I think I would want to suck it up and I would succeed in doing so. And I were to do it, it wouldn't be a lie. It would be a conscious choice with full awareness of the trade-offs involved. I imagine that close friends would probably know how I feel and how that is different from how I chose to live.

WHAT??? Are you serious? You have NO idea what you would do or how happy or not you would be. And living the way you want to live is not "indulging your sexual preference" - its being who you are.

Neither do you. And btw, I don't care to be happy. I care to have a certain kind of life, regardless of whether it will make me "happy" or not.

Also, sexual preferences are not "who you are" but a part of it. Another part is what you decide you want to be. That is no less you than what your hormones tell you you are.