PSA: No one wants you

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’ve definitely experienced this one, but more so with the dads in sports team circles.

What I find works is to beat them to the punch by throwing “your wife” into the conversation a lot. Even though “the wife” and I are friends… so I know her name and could easily say “Jen told me. . . “

It really throws them off. They usually take a step or two back soon thereafter… which seems to support OPs hypothesis.

And yes the culprits are usually the less attractive Dads.

I would find offensive if a dad hit on me. Why does he think I am up To it? Guys do not hit on everyone, even if the person is very attractive.

+1. But I'm 99.9% sure I give off that vibe so strongly no one would ever dare. Way back in my 20s the serial cheater in the office made one really awkward but positive comment about my weight and about mid-sentence realized I was not pleased. He dropped it real fast and nothing similar has happened in the 15+ years since.

[Anonymous]

I love the irony of OP claiming men are hyper sexualized when she literally thinks every man who speaks in her presence wants to bang her.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What's wrong with you???

You're projecting. The poor man wasn't thinking about you. You have main character syndrome, poor deluded one.

lol! Totally laughed at this one, and yes, you ARE correct! +1000000

Op- stop flattering yourself…No one wants you either.

[Anonymous]

What a strange post!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in my late 40s and look about 32. Still pretty hot. Literally have not had the sense that men were after me in years. Def used to get hit on in public fairly frequently in my 20s. If OP is in her mid 40s and thinks men are all after her, she is insane.

No you don’t.

Yes, she can. Different poster here. I get mistaken for early 30s all the time...in professional settings, especially. It can happen with some people. I am not dating now but when I am on the apps--not kidding--I get 20s men liking me ALL of the time who insist age does not matter. It's looks.

Post your (unfiltered) picture and we’ll decide. Otherwise, nope. They’re lying to you because it clearly gets a good reaction.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hear you OP. I introduced myself to a dad standing next to me at DD's class event, and the mom came out of nowhere and just stood between us. No hello, no smile. Dead.

No one wants you, and no one wants your husband.

Omg yes this. Or like if you’re sitting and talking to a guy at some event and then his wife or whatever comes over, sits next to him, puts her hand on his leg. So insecure!!! It’s always women who (obviously) don’t know me, and I’m sure I’ll get gaslit for saying this, but it has happened more with Southern women who haven’t socially been around many people with my EXOTIC looks 🙄🙄🙄 Like just calm down

I put my hand on my husband’s leg all the time. It has nothing to do with you.

Speaking of insecure, though - It sounds like you’re really invested in the idea that all men want to bang you and all women are jealous of you.

[Anonymous]

I didn’t feel that way mid-40s at all. I felt the opposite. I never got hit on or had jealous wives approach (that I was aware of). In a screaming match with DH, on the verge of a separation, I said tearfully “Is anyone going to want to have sex with me?” DH stopped, softened, looked at me and said “Larlo definitely would.” Larlo was a very good married friend of his. Like I was missing the obvious, not about that guy specifically, but that human attraction is a lot and nothing at all. It felt like a gift.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hear you OP. I introduced myself to a dad standing next to me at DD's class event, and the mom came out of nowhere and just stood between us. No hello, no smile. Dead.

No one wants you, and no one wants your husband.

Omg yes this. Or like if you’re sitting and talking to a guy at some event and then his wife or whatever comes over, sits next to him, puts her hand on his leg. So insecure!!! It’s always women who (obviously) don’t know me, and I’m sure I’ll get gaslit for saying this, but it has happened more with Southern women who haven’t socially been around many people with my EXOTIC looks 🙄🙄🙄 Like just calm down

I put my hand on my husband’s leg all the time. It has nothing to do with you.

Speaking of insecure, though - It sounds like you’re really invested in the idea that all men want to bang you and all women are jealous of you.

I never said that ALL women who EVER touch their husbands leg - it’s a very specific thing that happens infrequently but is recognizable, annoying, and pathetic at the same time. If you read the thread you’ll see other examples of this from PPs. Anyway literally none of what you wrote describes me, but of
course it’s easier to create a hyperbolic straw man for you to take out some feelings on

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hear you OP. I introduced myself to a dad standing next to me at DD's class event, and the mom came out of nowhere and just stood between us. No hello, no smile. Dead.

No one wants you, and no one wants your husband.

Omg yes this. Or like if you’re sitting and talking to a guy at some event and then his wife or whatever comes over, sits next to him, puts her hand on his leg. So insecure!!! It’s always women who (obviously) don’t know me, and I’m sure I’ll get gaslit for saying this, but it has happened more with Southern women who haven’t socially been around many people with my EXOTIC looks 🙄🙄🙄 Like just calm down

So much this. I would very much like to be excluded from this narrative of cheating husband, polymarriage, whatever. I just want to watch my kid's recital ok?!

Haha yes thank you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:While some of this may be delusion/main character syndrome on OP's part, I've witnessed this behavior. Both types: the man who is obviously interested/staring, gets caught, and then does a "soft blame" and says some kind of "let's go find mom" to deflect from his rudeness and project it onto the person he was oogling, and the overprotective/overinvested wife who is on regular border patrol around her spouse at all times, assuming everyone in the vicinity wants a piece (probably because she knows he'll give it).

I dress to depress so it's rarely me being targeted for the attention. OP, you might try the same.

I think this is a really good description of what those of us who understand what’s being talked about on this thread, but it seems like a lot of people responding either would rather pretend the subtleties don’t exist, or seriously have no social or conversational skills and don’t understand body language

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:While some of this may be delusion/main character syndrome on OP's part, I've witnessed this behavior. Both types: the man who is obviously interested/staring, gets caught, and then does a "soft blame" and says some kind of "let's go find mom" to deflect from his rudeness and project it onto the person he was oogling, and the overprotective/overinvested wife who is on regular border patrol around her spouse at all times, assuming everyone in the vicinity wants a piece (probably because she knows he'll give it).

I dress to depress so it's rarely me being targeted for the attention. OP, you might try the same.

Border patrol mom --- Took me OUT!!!
I absolutely know that type

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, I think it has less to do with you and more to do with men feeling out of place at the grocery store. Add in a small child and the man feels even more lost.

Uh, what? Men do not feel out of place at grocery stores nor with their children.

Maybe dad or child was partly deaf.
Maybe dad or child was neuro-atypical.
Maybe ap misread the situation (I mean ... I'm not even sure there WAS a situation).
Maybe dad was into ap.
Maybe dad had an inflated ego.
Maybe dad had no idea he was being so loud.
Maybe dad thought kid was annoying op.
Maybe op WAS stalking dad.

I actually do feel out of place at the grocery store. ~Mom of two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in my late 40s and look about 32. Still pretty hot. Literally have not had the sense that men were after me in years. Def used to get hit on in public fairly frequently in my 20s. If OP is in her mid 40s and thinks men are all after her, she is insane.

No you don’t.

PP. Yes, I do and it is not due to procedures. My parents looked young for their age, too. When people ask me if I have kids and I say I have two teenagers they look shocked and say oh I assumed they would be little. I had my kids in my early 30s, so not particularly young. I usually end up telling them my age so they don't think I had them when I was super young (internalized snobbery, probably, and sometimes I just let it go and say, yes, they are 17 and 15. This happens every time someone I don't know well asks me about my kids. I work with people who are in their 30s and they assume we are all the same age until I tell them we aren't. My husband is 7 years older and when we first got together we were often mistaken for father and daughter (embarrassing, I know).

That being said, I am not getting flirted with non-stop. I probably don't give off a young vibe even if I look young, but it's not like it was when I was younger and strange men ALWAYS took the seat next to me on a train, e.g., and chatted me up. It may also be smartphones. No one seems to interact that much anyway, so OP feeling like men are constantly after her in 2025 feels highly delusional.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am in my late 40s and look about 32. Still pretty hot. Literally have not had the sense that men were after me in years. Def used to get hit on in public fairly frequently in my 20s. If OP is in her mid 40s and thinks men are all after her, she is insane.

No you don’t.

PP. Yes, I do and it is not due to procedures. My parents looked young for their age, too. When people ask me if I have kids and I say I have two teenagers they look shocked and say oh I assumed they would be little. I had my kids in my early 30s, so not particularly young. I usually end up telling them my age so they don't think I had them when I was super young (internalized snobbery, probably, and sometimes I just let it go and say, yes, they are 17 and 15. This happens every time someone I don't know well asks me about my kids. I work with people who are in their 30s and they assume we are all the same age until I tell them we aren't. My husband is 7 years older and when we first got together we were often mistaken for father and daughter (embarrassing, I know).

That being said, I am not getting flirted with non-stop. I probably don't give off a young vibe even if I look young, but it's not like it was when I was younger and strange men ALWAYS took the seat next to me on a train, e.g., and chatted me up. It may also be smartphones. No one seems to interact that much anyway, so OP feeling like men are constantly after her in 2025 feels highly delusional.

That happens to me too every time I mention my kids ages. It’s just people trying to be polite and ingratiate themselves.

[Anonymous]

I love the irony of OP claiming men are hyper sexualized when she literally thinks every man who speaks in her presence wants to bang her.

+1. It is time for the OP to adjust her thinking and adapt to the world where she lives—a world where most men do not notice her.