Is divorce my final ruin? (Millennial edition)

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You guys are all %&$Woles. While I'm not in this posters shoes, I'm a first generation college student, student loaned mom who moved to dc to do good. No PP, I couldn't call on my parents for help with loans or down payments, so my partner and I pieced together what we could, and we do...ok. We get by but we aren't getting ahead. I'm just glad we aren't buying under these new interest rates.

I also think there's a huge untapped UGH/GRIEF/TRAUMA whatever people are comfortable calling in about parents of young kids during the pandemic. Maybe I should start a new thread or ask some journalist to do an investigative operation, but the untapped marital and work stress of the pandemic on working moms who are the breadwinners has to be a trauma no one has read into (and I don't use trauma lightly).


I can’t agree more. We ourselves were lucky, but I know plenty of otherwise competent people who were incredibly stressed out and still digging out of those holes mentally. It’s no wonder social events have reduced in number.


Oh spare me the dramatics about Covid. That was such a nothingburger.


PP, you have multiple kids in daycare when they shut down for six months?

OP, I am two years older than you and never had an opportunity to buy a house so you were lucky! It also sounds like you didn't experience trouble having children or any major health issues for you or your kids. You are lucky. Please look at it from that perspective. Then try to evaluate your relationship on its own merits without the noise.


Oh no, taking care of your own children was so traumatizing.

Spare me.

Jesus, you ignorant people.


Taking care of your own children who are just learning to walk while you have a stressful job at a government agency dealing with the pandemic?


Shit happens. You deal. This was nothing compared to the actual traumas facing older generations. Nothing. NOTHING.


+1. My dad went hungry a lot as a kid. Please, OP, get a grip.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You guys are all %&$Woles. While I'm not in this posters shoes, I'm a first generation college student, student loaned mom who moved to dc to do good. No PP, I couldn't call on my parents for help with loans or down payments, so my partner and I pieced together what we could, and we do...ok. We get by but we aren't getting ahead. I'm just glad we aren't buying under these new interest rates.

I also think there's a huge untapped UGH/GRIEF/TRAUMA whatever people are comfortable calling in about parents of young kids during the pandemic. Maybe I should start a new thread or ask some journalist to do an investigative operation, but the untapped marital and work stress of the pandemic on working moms who are the breadwinners has to be a trauma no one has read into (and I don't use trauma lightly).


I can’t agree more. We ourselves were lucky, but I know plenty of otherwise competent people who were incredibly stressed out and still digging out of those holes mentally. It’s no wonder social events have reduced in number.


Oh spare me the dramatics about Covid. That was such a nothingburger.


PP, you have multiple kids in daycare when they shut down for six months?

OP, I am two years older than you and never had an opportunity to buy a house so you were lucky! It also sounds like you didn't experience trouble having children or any major health issues for you or your kids. You are lucky. Please look at it from that perspective. Then try to evaluate your relationship on its own merits without the noise.


Oh no, taking care of your own children was so traumatizing.

Spare me.

Jesus, you ignorant people.


Taking care of your own children who are just learning to walk while you have a stressful job at a government agency dealing with the pandemic?


Shit happens. You deal. This was nothing compared to the actual traumas facing older generations. Nothing. NOTHING.


+1. My dad went hungry a lot as a kid. Please, OP, get a grip.


Seriously. My boomer dad had a dirt floor and no electricity on their farm, that my grandparents scratched out of the earth during the Depression. Then he was drafted for Vietnam. I grew up poor too but worked my way through college and made it to the middle class as a Gen-X-er but barely and it was damn hard.

But we all STILL had it better than every generation before them in human history.

Yes, Millennials and Gen-Z have problems too, not the least of which is their complete lack of knowledge of history, apparently.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You guys are all %&$Woles. While I'm not in this posters shoes, I'm a first generation college student, student loaned mom who moved to dc to do good. No PP, I couldn't call on my parents for help with loans or down payments, so my partner and I pieced together what we could, and we do...ok. We get by but we aren't getting ahead. I'm just glad we aren't buying under these new interest rates.

I also think there's a huge untapped UGH/GRIEF/TRAUMA whatever people are comfortable calling in about parents of young kids during the pandemic. Maybe I should start a new thread or ask some journalist to do an investigative operation, but the untapped marital and work stress of the pandemic on working moms who are the breadwinners has to be a trauma no one has read into (and I don't use trauma lightly).


I can’t agree more. We ourselves were lucky, but I know plenty of otherwise competent people who were incredibly stressed out and still digging out of those holes mentally. It’s no wonder social events have reduced in number.


Oh spare me the dramatics about Covid. That was such a nothingburger.


PP, you have multiple kids in daycare when they shut down for six months?

OP, I am two years older than you and never had an opportunity to buy a house so you were lucky! It also sounds like you didn't experience trouble having children or any major health issues for you or your kids. You are lucky. Please look at it from that perspective. Then try to evaluate your relationship on its own merits without the noise.


Oh no, taking care of your own children was so traumatizing.

Spare me.

Jesus, you ignorant people.


Taking care of your own children who are just learning to walk while you have a stressful job at a government agency dealing with the pandemic?


Shit happens. You deal. This was nothing compared to the actual traumas facing older generations. Nothing. NOTHING.


+1. My dad went hungry a lot as a kid. Please, OP, get a grip.


Seriously. My boomer dad had a dirt floor and no electricity on their farm, that my grandparents scratched out of the earth during the Depression. Then he was drafted for Vietnam. I grew up poor too but worked my way through college and made it to the middle class as a Gen-X-er but barely and it was damn hard.

But we all STILL had it better than every generation before them in human history.

Yes, Millennials and Gen-Z have problems too, not the least of which is their complete lack of knowledge of history, apparently.


Another GenX here and I agree with everything the PP said. We had our own struggles and complications but I have no doubt our lives were easier than our parents. And my own kids who are teenagers have advantages I could never have dreamed of. Self-pity is pointless and corrosive. Do your best, work hard, change what makes you unhappy instead of spinning some narrative that the world is against you.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You guys are all %&$Woles. While I'm not in this posters shoes, I'm a first generation college student, student loaned mom who moved to dc to do good. No PP, I couldn't call on my parents for help with loans or down payments, so my partner and I pieced together what we could, and we do...ok. We get by but we aren't getting ahead. I'm just glad we aren't buying under these new interest rates.

I also think there's a huge untapped UGH/GRIEF/TRAUMA whatever people are comfortable calling in about parents of young kids during the pandemic. Maybe I should start a new thread or ask some journalist to do an investigative operation, but the untapped marital and work stress of the pandemic on working moms who are the breadwinners has to be a trauma no one has read into (and I don't use trauma lightly).


I can’t agree more. We ourselves were lucky, but I know plenty of otherwise competent people who were incredibly stressed out and still digging out of those holes mentally. It’s no wonder social events have reduced in number.


Oh spare me the dramatics about Covid. That was such a nothingburger.


PP, you have multiple kids in daycare when they shut down for six months?

OP, I am two years older than you and never had an opportunity to buy a house so you were lucky! It also sounds like you didn't experience trouble having children or any major health issues for you or your kids. You are lucky. Please look at it from that perspective. Then try to evaluate your relationship on its own merits without the noise.


Oh no, taking care of your own children was so traumatizing.

Spare me.

Jesus, you ignorant people.


Taking care of your own children who are just learning to walk while you have a stressful job at a government agency dealing with the pandemic?


Shit happens. You deal. This was nothing compared to the actual traumas facing older generations. Nothing. NOTHING.


+1. My dad went hungry a lot as a kid. Please, OP, get a grip.


Seriously. My boomer dad had a dirt floor and no electricity on their farm, that my grandparents scratched out of the earth during the Depression. Then he was drafted for Vietnam. I grew up poor too but worked my way through college and made it to the middle class as a Gen-X-er but barely and it was damn hard.

But we all STILL had it better than every generation before them in human history.

Yes, Millennials and Gen-Z have problems too, not the least of which is their complete lack of knowledge of history, apparently.


Another GenX here and I agree with everything the PP said. We had our own struggles and complications but I have no doubt our lives were easier than our parents. And my own kids who are teenagers have advantages I could never have dreamed of. Self-pity is pointless and corrosive. Do your best, work hard, change what makes you unhappy instead of spinning some narrative that the world is against you.


I think this is where an understanding of human history is useful, or even an understanding of the last 200 years or so of American history.

Yes, white Americans had a period of unprecedented prosperity in the mid 20th century. There were a raft of government programs that were undertaken to lift up the entire (white) population, from the GI Bill, to highways projects, to the entire project of building out the suburbs and making sure people could afford to buy homes.

But not only were those gains unavailable to non-white Americans (look it up), but they were also pretty temporary. By the time we got around to extending all of those social welfare programs to Black and brown Americans, they were suddenly too expensive to continue funding.

It's absolutely true that Millennials as a group have a steeper road to climb to middle class prosperity than their parents, but their definition of "middle class" is also a heck of a lot more expensive. Because they themselves grew up in 3500 square foot McMansions in highly segregated suburbs, they think that's what middle class looks like and spurn integrated close-in neighborhoods that actually much more closely resemble what middle class looked like before the massive wealth transfers of the New Deal to white Americans.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You guys are all %&$Woles. While I'm not in this posters shoes, I'm a first generation college student, student loaned mom who moved to dc to do good. No PP, I couldn't call on my parents for help with loans or down payments, so my partner and I pieced together what we could, and we do...ok. We get by but we aren't getting ahead. I'm just glad we aren't buying under these new interest rates.

I also think there's a huge untapped UGH/GRIEF/TRAUMA whatever people are comfortable calling in about parents of young kids during the pandemic. Maybe I should start a new thread or ask some journalist to do an investigative operation, but the untapped marital and work stress of the pandemic on working moms who are the breadwinners has to be a trauma no one has read into (and I don't use trauma lightly).


I can’t agree more. We ourselves were lucky, but I know plenty of otherwise competent people who were incredibly stressed out and still digging out of those holes mentally. It’s no wonder social events have reduced in number.


Oh spare me the dramatics about Covid. That was such a nothingburger.


PP, you have multiple kids in daycare when they shut down for six months?

OP, I am two years older than you and never had an opportunity to buy a house so you were lucky! It also sounds like you didn't experience trouble having children or any major health issues for you or your kids. You are lucky. Please look at it from that perspective. Then try to evaluate your relationship on its own merits without the noise.


Oh no, taking care of your own children was so traumatizing.

Spare me.

Jesus, you ignorant people.


Taking care of your own children who are just learning to walk while you have a stressful job at a government agency dealing with the pandemic?


Shit happens. You deal. This was nothing compared to the actual traumas facing older generations. Nothing. NOTHING.


+1. My dad went hungry a lot as a kid. Please, OP, get a grip.


Seriously. My boomer dad had a dirt floor and no electricity on their farm, that my grandparents scratched out of the earth during the Depression. Then he was drafted for Vietnam. I grew up poor too but worked my way through college and made it to the middle class as a Gen-X-er but barely and it was damn hard.

But we all STILL had it better than every generation before them in human history.

Yes, Millennials and Gen-Z have problems too, not the least of which is their complete lack of knowledge of history, apparently.


Another GenX here and I agree with everything the PP said. We had our own struggles and complications but I have no doubt our lives were easier than our parents. And my own kids who are teenagers have advantages I could never have dreamed of. Self-pity is pointless and corrosive. Do your best, work hard, change what makes you unhappy instead of spinning some narrative that the world is against you.


I think this is where an understanding of human history is useful, or even an understanding of the last 200 years or so of American history.

Yes, white Americans had a period of unprecedented prosperity in the mid 20th century. There were a raft of government programs that were undertaken to lift up the entire (white) population, from the GI Bill, to highways projects, to the entire project of building out the suburbs and making sure people could afford to buy homes.

But not only were those gains unavailable to non-white Americans (look it up), but they were also pretty temporary. By the time we got around to extending all of those social welfare programs to Black and brown Americans, they were suddenly too expensive to continue funding.

It's absolutely true that Millennials as a group have a steeper road to climb to middle class prosperity than their parents, but their definition of "middle class" is also a heck of a lot more expensive. Because they themselves grew up in 3500 square foot McMansions in highly segregated suburbs, they think that's what middle class looks like and spurn integrated close-in neighborhoods that actually much more closely resemble what middle class looked like before the massive wealth transfers of the New Deal to white Americans.


All good points.
Anonymous
Gen x’er here. Please stop whining like a typical self- entitled millennial and grow up. Hopefully you are a troll.
Anonymous
Three kids?!?!?
Anonymous
Does the DW even work? My guess is that with three kids and living in the Midwest she does not.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You guys are all %&$Woles. While I'm not in this posters shoes, I'm a first generation college student, student loaned mom who moved to dc to do good. No PP, I couldn't call on my parents for help with loans or down payments, so my partner and I pieced together what we could, and we do...ok. We get by but we aren't getting ahead. I'm just glad we aren't buying under these new interest rates.

I also think there's a huge untapped UGH/GRIEF/TRAUMA whatever people are comfortable calling in about parents of young kids during the pandemic. Maybe I should start a new thread or ask some journalist to do an investigative operation, but the untapped marital and work stress of the pandemic on working moms who are the breadwinners has to be a trauma no one has read into (and I don't use trauma lightly).


I can’t agree more. We ourselves were lucky, but I know plenty of otherwise competent people who were incredibly stressed out and still digging out of those holes mentally. It’s no wonder social events have reduced in number.


Oh spare me the dramatics about Covid. That was such a nothingburger.


PP, you have multiple kids in daycare when they shut down for six months?

OP, I am two years older than you and never had an opportunity to buy a house so you were lucky! It also sounds like you didn't experience trouble having children or any major health issues for you or your kids. You are lucky. Please look at it from that perspective. Then try to evaluate your relationship on its own merits without the noise.


Oh no, taking care of your own children was so traumatizing.

Spare me.

Jesus, you ignorant people.


Taking care of your own children who are just learning to walk while you have a stressful job at a government agency dealing with the pandemic?


Shit happens. You deal. This was nothing compared to the actual traumas facing older generations. Nothing. NOTHING.


+1. My dad went hungry a lot as a kid. Please, OP, get a grip.


Seriously. My boomer dad had a dirt floor and no electricity on their farm, that my grandparents scratched out of the earth during the Depression. Then he was drafted for Vietnam. I grew up poor too but worked my way through college and made it to the middle class as a Gen-X-er but barely and it was damn hard.

But we all STILL had it better than every generation before them in human history.

Yes, Millennials and Gen-Z have problems too, not the least of which is their complete lack of knowledge of history, apparently.


Another GenX here and I agree with everything the PP said. We had our own struggles and complications but I have no doubt our lives were easier than our parents. And my own kids who are teenagers have advantages I could never have dreamed of. Self-pity is pointless and corrosive. Do your best, work hard, change what makes you unhappy instead of spinning some narrative that the world is against you.


I think this is where an understanding of human history is useful, or even an understanding of the last 200 years or so of American history.

Yes, white Americans had a period of unprecedented prosperity in the mid 20th century. There were a raft of government programs that were undertaken to lift up the entire (white) population, from the GI Bill, to highways projects, to the entire project of building out the suburbs and making sure people could afford to buy homes.

But not only were those gains unavailable to non-white Americans (look it up), but they were also pretty temporary. By the time we got around to extending all of those social welfare programs to Black and brown Americans, they were suddenly too expensive to continue funding.

It's absolutely true that Millennials as a group have a steeper road to climb to middle class prosperity than their parents, but their definition of "middle class" is also a heck of a lot more expensive. Because they themselves grew up in 3500 square foot McMansions in highly segregated suburbs, they think that's what middle class looks like and spurn integrated close-in neighborhoods that actually much more closely resemble what middle class looked like before the massive wealth transfers of the New Deal to white Americans.


Millennials don’t have a “steeper road to climb to middle class prosperity.” Most of them were born INTO it. But they lack the self-awareness to realize it. That’s what people mean when they talk about it being such an entitled generation. Yes, their Boomer parents provided that, but their starting baseline in life is so much better than any other generation in history.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You guys are all %&$Woles. While I'm not in this posters shoes, I'm a first generation college student, student loaned mom who moved to dc to do good. No PP, I couldn't call on my parents for help with loans or down payments, so my partner and I pieced together what we could, and we do...ok. We get by but we aren't getting ahead. I'm just glad we aren't buying under these new interest rates.

I also think there's a huge untapped UGH/GRIEF/TRAUMA whatever people are comfortable calling in about parents of young kids during the pandemic. Maybe I should start a new thread or ask some journalist to do an investigative operation, but the untapped marital and work stress of the pandemic on working moms who are the breadwinners has to be a trauma no one has read into (and I don't use trauma lightly).


I can’t agree more. We ourselves were lucky, but I know plenty of otherwise competent people who were incredibly stressed out and still digging out of those holes mentally. It’s no wonder social events have reduced in number.


Oh spare me the dramatics about Covid. That was such a nothingburger.


PP, you have multiple kids in daycare when they shut down for six months?

OP, I am two years older than you and never had an opportunity to buy a house so you were lucky! It also sounds like you didn't experience trouble having children or any major health issues for you or your kids. You are lucky. Please look at it from that perspective. Then try to evaluate your relationship on its own merits without the noise.


Oh no, taking care of your own children was so traumatizing.

Spare me.

Jesus, you ignorant people.


Taking care of your own children who are just learning to walk while you have a stressful job at a government agency dealing with the pandemic?


Shit happens. You deal. This was nothing compared to the actual traumas facing older generations. Nothing. NOTHING.


+1. My dad went hungry a lot as a kid. Please, OP, get a grip.


Seriously. My boomer dad had a dirt floor and no electricity on their farm, that my grandparents scratched out of the earth during the Depression. Then he was drafted for Vietnam. I grew up poor too but worked my way through college and made it to the middle class as a Gen-X-er but barely and it was damn hard.

But we all STILL had it better than every generation before them in human history.

Yes, Millennials and Gen-Z have problems too, not the least of which is their complete lack of knowledge of history, apparently.


Another GenX here and I agree with everything the PP said. We had our own struggles and complications but I have no doubt our lives were easier than our parents. And my own kids who are teenagers have advantages I could never have dreamed of. Self-pity is pointless and corrosive. Do your best, work hard, change what makes you unhappy instead of spinning some narrative that the world is against you.


I think this is where an understanding of human history is useful, or even an understanding of the last 200 years or so of American history.

Yes, white Americans had a period of unprecedented prosperity in the mid 20th century. There were a raft of government programs that were undertaken to lift up the entire (white) population, from the GI Bill, to highways projects, to the entire project of building out the suburbs and making sure people could afford to buy homes.

But not only were those gains unavailable to non-white Americans (look it up), but they were also pretty temporary. By the time we got around to extending all of those social welfare programs to Black and brown Americans, they were suddenly too expensive to continue funding.

It's absolutely true that Millennials as a group have a steeper road to climb to middle class prosperity than their parents, but their definition of "middle class" is also a heck of a lot more expensive. Because they themselves grew up in 3500 square foot McMansions in highly segregated suburbs, they think that's what middle class looks like and spurn integrated close-in neighborhoods that actually much more closely resemble what middle class looked like before the massive wealth transfers of the New Deal to white Americans.


Millennials don’t have a “steeper road to climb to middle class prosperity.” Most of them were born INTO it. But they lack the self-awareness to realize it. That’s what people mean when they talk about it being such an entitled generation. Yes, their Boomer parents provided that, but their starting baseline in life is so much better than any other generation in history.


^ I think this is right. I think the problem is that no one ever wants to trade down their standard of living - so if you grew up in a nice house with great food and a good car, then when you set out on your own and you don't immediately have these same things it feels like something's been taken away from you. My parents lived in a bad apartment, with an old car, and we didn;t have expensive vacations - until they got older and more established, and then we had a much higher standard of living. But it's not realistic that I will have their mid-life standard of living when I am just getting started myself. Then I have the bad apartment and old car (if there's a car at all), etc. There is just this sense that you want it all, and you want it immediately, and not having it makes the universe unfair - not that every generation has to go through the stages of adulthood until they, too, feel the comfort they grew up with (if they were lucky enough to grow up with comfort).

Certainly some things have changed. Housing prices, for example. The cost of college. It's nuts. Even since I finished grad school in 2000 - coming out with $160k in loans, that I paid off over 20 years. It's more expensive now.

But come on. The world is also infinitely easier in so many ways than it used to be.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You guys are all %&$Woles. While I'm not in this posters shoes, I'm a first generation college student, student loaned mom who moved to dc to do good. No PP, I couldn't call on my parents for help with loans or down payments, so my partner and I pieced together what we could, and we do...ok. We get by but we aren't getting ahead. I'm just glad we aren't buying under these new interest rates.

I also think there's a huge untapped UGH/GRIEF/TRAUMA whatever people are comfortable calling in about parents of young kids during the pandemic. Maybe I should start a new thread or ask some journalist to do an investigative operation, but the untapped marital and work stress of the pandemic on working moms who are the breadwinners has to be a trauma no one has read into (and I don't use trauma lightly).


I can’t agree more. We ourselves were lucky, but I know plenty of otherwise competent people who were incredibly stressed out and still digging out of those holes mentally. It’s no wonder social events have reduced in number.


Oh spare me the dramatics about Covid. That was such a nothingburger.


PP, you have multiple kids in daycare when they shut down for six months?

OP, I am two years older than you and never had an opportunity to buy a house so you were lucky! It also sounds like you didn't experience trouble having children or any major health issues for you or your kids. You are lucky. Please look at it from that perspective. Then try to evaluate your relationship on its own merits without the noise.


Oh no, taking care of your own children was so traumatizing.

Spare me.

Jesus, you ignorant people.


Taking care of your own children who are just learning to walk while you have a stressful job at a government agency dealing with the pandemic?


Shit happens. You deal. This was nothing compared to the actual traumas facing older generations. Nothing. NOTHING.


+1. My dad went hungry a lot as a kid. Please, OP, get a grip.


Seriously. My boomer dad had a dirt floor and no electricity on their farm, that my grandparents scratched out of the earth during the Depression. Then he was drafted for Vietnam. I grew up poor too but worked my way through college and made it to the middle class as a Gen-X-er but barely and it was damn hard.

But we all STILL had it better than every generation before them in human history.

Yes, Millennials and Gen-Z have problems too, not the least of which is their complete lack of knowledge of history, apparently.


Another GenX here and I agree with everything the PP said. We had our own struggles and complications but I have no doubt our lives were easier than our parents. And my own kids who are teenagers have advantages I could never have dreamed of. Self-pity is pointless and corrosive. Do your best, work hard, change what makes you unhappy instead of spinning some narrative that the world is against you.


I think this is where an understanding of human history is useful, or even an understanding of the last 200 years or so of American history.

Yes, white Americans had a period of unprecedented prosperity in the mid 20th century. There were a raft of government programs that were undertaken to lift up the entire (white) population, from the GI Bill, to highways projects, to the entire project of building out the suburbs and making sure people could afford to buy homes.

But not only were those gains unavailable to non-white Americans (look it up), but they were also pretty temporary. By the time we got around to extending all of those social welfare programs to Black and brown Americans, they were suddenly too expensive to continue funding.

It's absolutely true that Millennials as a group have a steeper road to climb to middle class prosperity than their parents, but their definition of "middle class" is also a heck of a lot more expensive. Because they themselves grew up in 3500 square foot McMansions in highly segregated suburbs, they think that's what middle class looks like and spurn integrated close-in neighborhoods that actually much more closely resemble what middle class looked like before the massive wealth transfers of the New Deal to white Americans.


I was with you until that last bit! No, even if you want to live in a small house built in 1940 in one of those close-in neighborhoods and hate the idea of a huge McMansion, housing there is STILL much much more expensive in relation to income than it used to be. 500-700k for the smallest SFH or even rowhouse in the DMV is not affordable!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No judgment please, so step aside Gen X.

Elder millennial here who was sold (literally) the American dream. You have no other choice but to go to college and you will take out exorbitant loans. Marry in the Midwest by mid-20s. 3 kids by early 30s. On the back of highly taxed retirement withdrawal, somehow put a down payment on a decent home and now house and student loan poor. No chance for college savings for kids.

Add unhappy in marriage, blaming one another for ending up in *this* place. From coming to age in the era of 9/11, graduating college in an economic recession, attempting hope in Obama era to be shattered with Trump. Trying to raise a young family and being slammed with a pandemic. Everything has been terrible, silver lining coming only in the love I have for my kids. Dark cloud over everything post-Nintendo in the basement with my siblings - 1995.

Will a divorce be the final straw? Are elder millennials f**ked forever or am I the special kind that was hit with it all?


You sound clinically depressed and might benefit from therapy and medicine. I mean that kindly.

Don’t go down the “our generation had it so tough.” Gen X and Boomers lived every day with the threat of global nuclear annihilation. The Greatest Generation survived a Great Depression and two world wars. The things you’ve had to deal in your life are nothing.

Stop blaming others for your unhappiness. If you do, you WILL end up divorced and this will be a self-fulfilling prophecy.


threat of global nuclear annihilation? really?


Yes. Absolutely. I knew the location of every fallout shelter in town. Watched "The Day After" when it was broadcast. The threat of mutual destruction was omnipresent and real until about 1989, even even then with the fall of the Iron Curtain there were concerns about the security of Russian nukes.


So similar to how kids today know every exit in school to get away from a potential school shooter, have quarterly drills to practice, etc? The closest weve been to another nuclear fallout since Cold War was last year so you arent the only generation to experience it.


No one said kids today don't have even more pressing existential threats. But yes, gen x kids grew up believing that any minute now, Russia was going to nuke us. The fact people find this so unbelievable does suggest, I think, that we are the last generation in a while for this to have been the thing that kept us up at night.

This doesn't have to be a battle of the generations. We can acknowledge that every generation had some things harder and some things easier. Including, yes, millennials.


I remember having a conversation with my father about how our podunk little rural NJ town was likely on a preliminary or secondary target list for the USSR, because there was a telephone switching station in it that controlled the phones for half the east coast. I think I was 10.

No one said Gen X kids had it exclusively rough - people are just pushing back on those who are claiming that their generations *ahemmillennialsahem* have it worse than anyone.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:No judgment please, so step aside Gen X.

Elder millennial here who was sold (literally) the American dream. You have no other choice but to go to college and you will take out exorbitant loans. Marry in the Midwest by mid-20s. 3 kids by early 30s. On the back of highly taxed retirement withdrawal, somehow put a down payment on a decent home and now house and student loan poor. No chance for college savings for kids.

Add unhappy in marriage, blaming one another for ending up in *this* place. From coming to age in the era of 9/11, graduating college in an economic recession, attempting hope in Obama era to be shattered with Trump. Trying to raise a young family and being slammed with a pandemic. Everything has been terrible, silver lining coming only in the love I have for my kids. Dark cloud over everything post-Nintendo in the basement with my siblings - 1995.

Will a divorce be the final straw? Are elder millennials f**ked forever or am I the special kind that was hit with it all?


You sound clinically depressed and might benefit from therapy and medicine. I mean that kindly.

Don’t go down the “our generation had it so tough.” Gen X and Boomers lived every day with the threat of global nuclear annihilation. The Greatest Generation survived a Great Depression and two world wars. The things you’ve had to deal in your life are nothing.

Stop blaming others for your unhappiness. If you do, you WILL end up divorced and this will be a self-fulfilling prophecy.


threat of global nuclear annihilation? really?


Yes. Absolutely. I knew the location of every fallout shelter in town. Watched "The Day After" when it was broadcast. The threat of mutual destruction was omnipresent and real until about 1989, even even then with the fall of the Iron Curtain there were concerns about the security of Russian nukes.


So similar to how kids today know every exit in school to get away from a potential school shooter, have quarterly drills to practice, etc? The closest weve been to another nuclear fallout since Cold War was last year so you arent the only generation to experience it.


No one said kids today don't have even more pressing existential threats. But yes, gen x kids grew up believing that any minute now, Russia was going to nuke us. The fact people find this so unbelievable does suggest, I think, that we are the last generation in a while for this to have been the thing that kept us up at night.

This doesn't have to be a battle of the generations. We can acknowledge that every generation had some things harder and some things easier. Including, yes, millennials.


I remember having a conversation with my father about how our podunk little rural NJ town was likely on a preliminary or secondary target list for the USSR, because there was a telephone switching station in it that controlled the phones for half the east coast. I think I was 10.

No one said Gen X kids had it exclusively rough - people are just pushing back on those who are claiming that their generations *ahemmillennialsahem* have it worse than anyone.


I am the PP - and yes, for sure, that's exactly what I meant. Sorry if that didn't come through.
Anonymous
I think the replies in this thread sound closer to OP’s tone than the posters realize or intend. The vast majority of the posters here castigating OP for her whininess and self-absorption sound equally whiny and self-absorbed (you think YOU have it bad? Well let me tell you about ME! YOUR life is easy!).

Additionally, most of these posters seem as though they are just about boiling over with rage, which to me indicates that they are NOT handling their own lives as wonderfully as they would have OP believe.

Lashing out at random strangers on an anonymous mommy message board is not a healthy way to relieve stress, people.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I think the replies in this thread sound closer to OP’s tone than the posters realize or intend. The vast majority of the posters here castigating OP for her whininess and self-absorption sound equally whiny and self-absorbed (you think YOU have it bad? Well let me tell you about ME! YOUR life is easy!).

Additionally, most of these posters seem as though they are just about boiling over with rage, which to me indicates that they are NOT handling their own lives as wonderfully as they would have OP believe.

Lashing out at random strangers on an anonymous mommy message board is not a healthy way to relieve stress, people.


I don't get anyone boiling over with rage?
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