My freshman is unhappy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Where is the Dad? He should be watching and helping him as well.

Why do assumd Dad is not involved because mom is the one sharing the info?

[Anonymous]

My dd isnt dropping out. She is coming home but is going to zoom from home rather than her small dorm room!

That's 100% OK!

Not an option for my DS who is at VMI. But if my DD's classes all go online and she decides to move back home....that's acceptable. Although you know what I see happening if this happens en masse? Kids moving back home and hanging out and going to parties.

[Anonymous]

^^...or because this is DCUM...college "pods" popping up where groups of college kids who were friends in HS rent homes or go to family vacation home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

My dd isnt dropping out. She is coming home but is going to zoom from home rather than her small dorm room!

That's 100% OK!

Not an option for my DS who is at VMI. But if my DD's classes all go online and she decides to move back home....that's acceptable. Although you know what I see happening if this happens en masse? Kids moving back home and hanging out and going to parties.

My kid is a homebody so I don't think she will be going to parties! More like watching the Great British Bake off and the Crown with me and some popcorn

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

My dd isnt dropping out. She is coming home but is going to zoom from home rather than her small dorm room!

That's 100% OK!

Not an option for my DS who is at VMI. But if my DD's classes all go online and she decides to move back home....that's acceptable. Although you know what I see happening if this happens en masse? Kids moving back home and hanging out and going to parties.

My kid is a homebody so I don't think she will be going to parties! More like watching the Great British Bake off and the Crown with me and some popcorn

Ha same! DD is home for first semester doing virtual. Classes don’t start until next week though

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

My dd isnt dropping out. She is coming home but is going to zoom from home rather than her small dorm room!

That's 100% OK!

Not an option for my DS who is at VMI. But if my DD's classes all go online and she decides to move back home....that's acceptable. Although you know what I see happening if this happens en masse? Kids moving back home and hanging out and going to parties.

My kid is a homebody so I don't think she will be going to parties! More like watching the Great British Bake off and the Crown with me and some popcorn

Ha same! DD is home for first semester doing virtual. Classes don’t start until next week though

I have the same kid.

Can't relate at all to people saying crazy partying is inevitable/normal/to be expected. Kids vary, as do the types of kids drawn to particular schools.

[Anonymous]

I have the same kid.

Can't relate at all to people saying crazy partying is inevitable/normal/to be expected. Kids vary, as do the types of kids drawn to particular schools.

My DD also what I would call a homebody - but if staying at home to do online...she would still end up hanging out with a few friends if they also came back....and her boyfriend.

[Anonymous]

I had a hard first semester, no friends, lonely. It was a character-building experience. We can’t swoop in and solve all our kid’s problems. I know covid makes things totally different, but just be a listening ear for him and ask him how he could change things. Don’t call his RA. Please

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a hard first semester, no friends, lonely. It was a character-building experience. We can’t swoop in and solve all our kid’s problems. I know covid makes things totally different, but just be a listening ear for him and ask him how he could change things. Don’t call his RA. Please

Again, this semester is very different

[Anonymous]

I hesitate to say who cares about the money, but still...one week is not enough time to decide you don’t like something. I would talk to your DS daily, go visit if needed, and most importantly, remind him he is not the only student that feels like this. He needs to seek out another kids, who are sitting alone in the dining hall, and say “Do you mind if I sit here?” Of course this is hard, but at the end of 4 years, and your child gets a job in a new city, you can reference this time and it will give him confidence going forward. Good luck OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hesitate to say who cares about the money, but still...one week is not enough time to decide you don’t like something. I would talk to your DS daily, go visit if needed, and most importantly, remind him he is not the only student that feels like this. He needs to seek out another kids, who are sitting alone in the dining hall, and say “Do you mind if I sit here?” Of course this is hard, but at the end of 4 years, and your child gets a job in a new city, you can reference this time and it will give him confidence going forward. Good luck OP.

NP. There is no “dining hall” this year. It’s clear none of you have freshmen this year.

[Anonymous]

When are people around here going to GET that their experience is not universal.

My kid's school IS doing a dining hall (in addition to grab and go). Kids can't self serve, use disposable plates and utensils, and have to sit with their pods, but they are going to the dining hall. So...just stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I had a hard first semester, no friends, lonely. It was a character-building experience. We can’t swoop in and solve all our kid’s problems. I know covid makes things totally different, but just be a listening ear for him and ask him how he could change things. Don’t call his RA. Please

I agree with not calling the RA but your experience is not relevant to this situation. There are no activities going on and all their classes are zoom. They cant even eat in the caferteria and students are staying in the doom.

So dont talk about your experience because honestly you have no idea what kids are facing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hesitate to say who cares about the money, but still...one week is not enough time to decide you don’t like something. I would talk to your DS daily, go visit if needed, and most importantly, remind him he is not the only student that feels like this. He needs to seek out another kids, who are sitting alone in the dining hall, and say “Do you mind if I sit here?” Of course this is hard, but at the end of 4 years, and your child gets a job in a new city, you can reference this time and it will give him confidence going forward. Good luck OP.

NP. There is no “dining hall” this year. It’s clear none of you have freshmen this year.

Even in the few schools that having dining halls you can eat in currently, you can't approach a stranger and sit with them--you're restricted to your "pod" since eating is a time when you can't wear a mask. If you don't gel with your pod, you have few options. In the few schools that have F2F classes, you're 6 ft away from the next person and wearing masks. It's unusually hard to get into a social groove in this situation because all the normal paths--which are in usual circumstances still a bit awkward-- are blocked.

[Anonymous]

So you can's draw lessons from anyone else's experience.

Got it.

These freshmen are suffering more than any generation before them.

Got it.

I think you parents need to take a breath.