Stuck in house with conservative in laws- help me keep my cool

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love the people saying I should stay. Sure, no prob for me to let my kids listen to talk about how black people are lazy, women should fulfill their womanly duties, and other garbage like that. DH pushes back but as I said, FIL is hard of hearing and just gets going like a freight train and doesnt allow any back and forth. Am just leaving from now on. Have developed a code word for my kids so I don’t have to say “come, children, grandpa’s being an ignorant dick.” My kids are too young for this to be much of a learning experience. DH knows his parents have very little time left so I’m having a hard time expressing how I’ve lost all respect for them. It hasn’t always been like this, just the last 4 years or so.

I’m confused OP because what you wrote in your original rant about your FIL isn’t what you wrote here. This stuff is disgusting.

It is interesting that when OP was called out on the fact that her original specific examples of his views weren’t really that bad, she suddenly makes vague accusations about racism and sexism. If she wants sympathy, didn’t she say that the first time?

[Anonymous]

Hate the sin, love the sinner

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why are liberals so intolerant? "Don't agree with me? The SHUT UP!"

OP isn't saying that at all actually. She seems to be trying really hard to do the exact opposite.

[Anonymous]

OP, I didn't read through the whole thread and won't get into all the political stuff (I agree with you, mightily). To put this in context, my super-liberal dad who is from the south raised questions about why and how to take down Confederate monuments and he and my DH and I had a thoughtful conversation where I felt like my DH and I were heard and respected. So I think there's a time and a place to challenge people's thinking but there are some people it just won't ever work with.

I think your question is more about how to deal with ILs or other family members who drive you nuts. My MIL-figure (not my DH's mom, who sadly died many years ago) routinely says inflammatory and offensive shit. Sometimes it's about other racial or ethnic groups, sometimes it's about me personally, sometimes it's about my profession. Honestly, I have limited my time around her by a lot. In some cases, my SIL or DH or I have asked something benign like "what do you mean by that?" or "have you ever considered....?" and she seems receptive to some of what we say. But overall, she's just unpleasant.

For now, I would just avoid. Once you feel a little more collected, you might consider saying (or better yet having your spouse say) "we don't want political differences to ruin our relationship. Let's avoid taking about them." But I also think staying in a hotel is perfectly reasonable, and if it's perceived as a snub, oh well! Boundaries exist to allow us to have healthy relationships, sometimes with unhealthy people!

[Anonymous]

OP is the crazy one

[Anonymous]

OP troll. Reporting your stupid thread

[Anonymous]

I'm not even remotely liberal and I get OP. These rubes who compulsively repeat Fox News talking points and make negative comments about every demographic except older white males are annoying as hell. You can't talk to them about politics because they have their own facts and will use tactics like deflection when cornered. The easiest method is to not play their game.

They are interested in politics because they have no life. You can try making sarcastic remarks like, "You don't get out much, do you?" Or if he makes a comment about you watching BBC, say something like, "Sorry, Bob, All in the Family isnt on right now." You don't want to brawl with most of these idiots because they have memorized so much material. It is best to counter punch and get out. You want it to hurt. You need to be somewhat consistent so that he knows not to take things too far.

[Anonymous]

Wow what. B****ch OP is. Here you have elderly parents in poor health but the should STFU so OP can lecture them on her liberal beliefs.
And maybe they will die soon.

[Anonymous]

You don’t have any cool to keep. And this thread belongs in the political section.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP troll. Reporting your stupid thread

Not OP, but...Seriously, nothing here to report.

As usual people piled on about the politics angle when the ORIGINAL question was primarily about how to get through the remaining days of a visit. The political turn came about mostly because of posts that don't seem to be OP's but which fixated on the politics. Predictable here, though, for a thread to go off the rails. Huffing and puffing indignantly about reporting it is silly. Far worse has stayed on these boards.

Go on, continue the predictability by saying I "must be OP sock-puppeting" or whatever the usual accusation is at this point. That kind of snark always seems to make some posters here feel good about themselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People like OP are why Trump won.

Uh, no. Trump won because there were 75k extra amoral a-holes in Michigan, Wisconsin, and Pennsylvania who wanted to put a POS into the White House.

They're amoral because they hate the hypocritical intolerance of people like OP? No, they're just fed (that's FED up - not F'ED) up. And don't kid yourself, their population is growing.

No, they're amoral because they support lies and corruption.

LOL. Why do you think "their population" is GROWING?

PA Trump voter here. Yes, Trump support is growing! I’ll be voting for him in 2020.

[Anonymous]

OP I get you. Fox TV turned my father into a frothing at the mouth lunatic.

So we spent less time with him. And while I felt sad I did not feel guilty. His choice to turn into a mean bigot.

I felt relief when he passed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My FIL is ranting about poor people (why should rich people pay for their education?), how northerners want to tear down history (confederate statues), and started in on how unpatriotic it is to go against th the president before I left the room. He’s prone to pontification and I just don’t know how to not engage he makes me so f’ing mad with his hateful ignorant bs. I don’t want my young glisten around this crap. Ridiculous thing is he’s an immigrant who’s lives in a northern state for 50 years. I feel terrible but all his achievements and live he’s given my family mean nothing to me because he’s a racist elitist person.

I have two more days. I’m hiding out in the garage with my kids. Somebody please give me a mantra to get through the next 48hoirs.

Here’s a mantra:
“Fox News lies to you. Rupert Murdoch thinks you’re a sucker. He lies to you to get you to vote for billionaires. You just voted for a $1 trillion tax cut for billionaires put on a credit card.”

There’s no way someone believes tripe like the above without being deeply enmeshed in conservative propaganda. If you say anything to him about politics you gotta go to the foundational issues: rightwing propaganda .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not even remotely liberal and I get OP. These rubes who compulsively repeat Fox News talking points and make negative comments about every demographic except older white males are annoying as hell. You can't talk to them about politics because they have their own facts and will use tactics like deflection when cornered. The easiest method is to not play their game.

They are interested in politics because they have no life. You can try making sarcastic remarks like, "You don't get out much, do you?" Or if he makes a comment about you watching BBC, say something like, "Sorry, Bob, All in the Family isnt on right now." You don't want to brawl with most of these idiots because they have memorized so much material. It is best to counter punch and get out. You want it to hurt. You need to be somewhat consistent so that he knows not to take things too far.

Yes. Tell them they’re a rube getting screwed by Murdoch, Koch, Adelson, Mercer, etc.
You can’t talk to them about politics - that’s exactly right. If you say anything make it about the GOP scamming them.

Another sarcastic response: “There’s only two kinds of conservatives: billionaires, and suckers.”

[Anonymous]

^ The two comments above are why this relationship would never work. Playing a game of "my propaganda is better than your propaganda" is your solution?