Sister is a SAHM and her workday social media posting drives me up a wall. Confront or leave alone?

[Anonymous]

I am confused by this concept of “workday hours”. I just checked the time and OP posted this whiny rant on social media when I was at work. So were plenty of nurses, ER docs, police officers, cashiers . . . Shouldn’t she have shown us a little respect?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is OP constantly watching social media at work?

You can view someone’s collective social media timeline of posts after the fact. You don’t have to see everything live.

But if OP is SO annoyed by the posts,why is she going back and reading old ones? It makes no sense. I don't think OP is real

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't care that she is posting while everyone else is working... why does that bother you? But, if she complains about not having enough money then she should definitely get a part time job she can work while kids are at school

+1. Her social media postings are her own business. If they bother you, snooze or unfollow her. The issue of money and her not working is a separate issue completely. If she complains to you in person, then you can suggest to her to get a job.

[Anonymous]

OP said the sister and her husband are leeching off OP's parents to make ends meet for her family. So the social media posting is really just rubbing it in that she's sitting on her ass all day and then calling her baby boomer parents for lifestyle cash? Trashy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She sits on her rump all day with her kids all in school. She's addicted to social media, posting cliche motivation mom quotes and kids sports practices all day fishing for likes and attagirls. They have no 529 for their kids. She constantly complains about money. Am I an awful sister for wanting to confront her? Our two brothers are passive and agree with me about her embarrassing herself (and our extended family, to be honest) but they refuse to say anything because they don't want to ruffle feathers. Her laziness and attention-craving drives me up a wall. At the very least get off social media while we're all at work, and maybe, just maybe consider getting a damn job?

*vent over*

Good God. Unfollow her on social media and get over yourself.

[Anonymous]

Why do you care so much? She’s not living with you. Get over it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why is OP constantly watching social media at work?

You can view someone’s collective social media timeline of posts after the fact. You don’t have to see everything live.

Then why is she making a specific point to look through her sister's posts, apparently??? Like doing it purposefully, as opposed to just happening upon them as she scrolls FB herself? That makes OP sound even stranger.

[Anonymous]

IGNORE HER SOCIAL MEDIA JUNK.

DON'T LISTEN TO HER COMPLAIN ABOUT MONEY. That's for her and her husband to sort out; lots of options, including her working XYZ hours a week.

NEVER LEND MONEY OR PAY FOR MAJOR THINGS (house repairs, vacations, their kids' stuff/camps).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP said the sister and her husband are leeching off OP's parents to make ends meet for her family. So the social media posting is really just rubbing it in that she's sitting on her ass all day and then calling her baby boomer parents for lifestyle cash? Trashy.

Yuck. Yes, trashy and selfish. Took bad the parents don't grow a backbone on this.

[Anonymous]

OP, she sounds like she may be struggling with depression-thus the inspirational quotes. How would you feel if she had a mental or physical health issue that made it hard to work and social media was the one thing that kept her from losing it and then you told her off? Just because you can't see what the issue may be doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

You are way over-reacting. Block her. You should not be on social media at work obsessively checking if sister poster again. Something tells me there is more going on with you and this is just a symptom. Calm down. Step away from the computer and LET.IT.GO...

[Anonymous]

I don’t see where OP says sister is leeching off of her parents. Even if she were, that’s the parents’ choice to speak up. Not a judgy, mean-spirited sister.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Sorry sweetie, everyone notices the facebook oversharers, especially those unemployed folks who share and post during the work day. It's excusable if you're a retired pensioner, it's not okay if you're in you're working prime and you're not at all wealthy enough to be a SAHM. It's honestly pathetic. Plus she leans on our parents to cover certain extra for the kids. Our folks aren't that well off. And none of us ask for financial help – we work.

Ahhh, so that's the root of the issue. You're mad or jealous that her family and kids are getting money you think should be yours or will be yours in the future.

what? Who respects the siblings whose leeching on elderly parents to pay for bills or extras??

[Anonymous]

You are jealous you have to work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First, myob.

Second, I’m sure you won’t get this, but being a SAHM can actually be quite hard. It’s very isolating (hence the social media) and not having money is not fun. The same set of pros and cons that apply to you working vs not working apply to her too, but — for whatever reason — she cane down on the other side of the equation. That doesn’t make it idyllic. And it may be that she doesn’t see a path to get from where she is to working, while still managing the household. Anyway, you might seek to be a little more understanding rather than your current combo of superior and envious.

I'm genuinely empathetic to her boredom and isolation. I'm not being mean, how is it not obvious to her that the kids are all in school now, she's bored with nothing to do, so she needs to go back to work? When I say "confront" I mean like we need to get her to wake up and realize she needs a job.

What job will let her take off for kid’s sick days, teacher work days, school vacations.........? And be home before they get home from school?

NP here. Preschool teacher. School sub. School employee (clinic or library assistant, office employee, kindergarten assisted, cafeteria monitor.)

Good idea, but these don't work like that. What about the logistics of you're subbing in Olney but your child is in school in Chevy Chase? What about certifications and schooling and requirements? What about family-based decisions on what is best?

It pisses me off that lots of women (who work, usually) feel that ALL women are obligated to work or they're letting women down. That's BS. It's often women who make a lot who just assume it's no biggie to get a PT job. Well, if you may $200K a year and don't work that's one thing, but if you have a BA in history and don't have a ton of experience and you might make $55K a year, the calculus for taking a PT job for even less is very different when you have to factor in childcare, before/after care (these are often needed for PT jobs), clothing, lunches, the impact that has logistical on the breadwinner, etc... It doesn't even mean you're going be saving a lot for college after the fact. And I say this as a working mom!

Pp here who is a SAHM. I could work any of the jobs I mentioned at my own local public school/preschool (and in fact I’m a sub at our public ES) and it works exactly like that. No logistics required. No certifications required. It really IS nbd. I don’t have a dog in this fight and don’t care what Op’s sister does or doesn’t do, I was just answering the question in bold.

[Anonymous]

Just leave it alone. We all know people like this, and we all know confrontation would do no good. Choose to be kind.