Sister is a SAHM and her workday social media posting drives me up a wall. Confront or leave alone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First, myob.

Second, I’m sure you won’t get this, but being a SAHM can actually be quite hard. It’s very isolating (hence the social media) and not having money is not fun. The same set of pros and cons that apply to you working vs not working apply to her too, but — for whatever reason — she cane down on the other side of the equation. That doesn’t make it idyllic. And it may be that she doesn’t see a path to get from where she is to working, while still managing the household. Anyway, you might seek to be a little more understanding rather than your current combo of superior and envious.

I'm genuinely empathetic to her boredom and isolation. I'm not being mean, how is it not obvious to her that the kids are all in school now, she's bored with nothing to do, so she needs to go back to work? When I say "confront" I mean like we need to get her to wake up and realize she needs a job.

Gee, I imagine she’s never heard of this thing called “working”....Definitely you should tell her of this new-fangled concept.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like you are way out in front on this. As in when the shit hits the fan do not look for anyone to support you. You may be all worked up about it and everyone just agrees with you because you are “crazy” about this issue.

You're wrong.

I work. My husband works. We don't b-tch about money. Brother 1 works. His wife works. They don't b-tch about money. Brother 2 works. His wife works. They don't b-tch about money.

Sister doesn't work. Her husband works. She fishes for dopamine hits on social media during work hours like a pathetic teenager. B-tches about money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:First, myob.

Second, I’m sure you won’t get this, but being a SAHM can actually be quite hard. It’s very isolating (hence the social media) and not having money is not fun. The same set of pros and cons that apply to you working vs not working apply to her too, but — for whatever reason — she cane down on the other side of the equation. That doesn’t make it idyllic. And it may be that she doesn’t see a path to get from where she is to working, while still managing the household. Anyway, you might seek to be a little more understanding rather than your current combo of superior and envious.

I'm genuinely empathetic to her boredom and isolation. I'm not being mean, how is it not obvious to her that the kids are all in school now, she's bored with nothing to do, so she needs to go back to work? When I say "confront" I mean like we need to get her to wake up and realize she needs a job.

Gee, I imagine she’s never heard of this thing called “working”....Definitely you should tell her of this new-fangled concept.

Honestly, get a job or not, whatever. What I'd really like her to stop doing is reminding everyone that she's lazy and desperate with the social media posts. I just figure a part-time job would cure the need for dopamine chasing, as she'd actually become occupied during the day. And of course it'd generate money they apparently need. Three birds, one stone!

[Anonymous]

Op, you don't sound very nice.

[Anonymous]

Lol. So worked up over Facebook. Relax. No one but you cares.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like you are way out in front on this. As in when the shit hits the fan do not look for anyone to support you. You may be all worked up about it and everyone just agrees with you because you are “crazy” about this issue.

You're wrong.

I work. My husband works. We don't b-tch about money. Brother 1 works. His wife works. They don't b-tch about money. Brother 2 works. His wife works. They don't b-tch about money.

Sister doesn't work. Her husband works. She fishes for dopamine hits on social media during work hours like a pathetic teenager. B-tches about money.

So she's bitching about money and you're bitching about her. Sounds like you both have pathetic lives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It sounds like you are way out in front on this. As in when the shit hits the fan do not look for anyone to support you. You may be all worked up about it and everyone just agrees with you because you are “crazy” about this issue.

You're wrong.

I work. My husband works. We don't b-tch about money. Brother 1 works. His wife works. They don't b-tch about money. Brother 2 works. His wife works. They don't b-tch about money.

Sister doesn't work. Her husband works. She fishes for dopamine hits on social media during work hours like a pathetic teenager. B-tches about money.

dp: Everyone here tells you to myob, but you keep insisting that it’s your place to tell your sister she’s lazy and stupid (and, worse, not because you care one wit about her, but because how you think she makes the “extended family” look). Godspeed to your sister. With family like you, she needs it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Lol. So worked up over Facebook. Relax. No one but you cares.

Agreed. And the only person who comes off as bad and embarrassing is OP

[Anonymous]

It sounds like you are more concerned about yourself than your sister. You keep saying how her social media presence reflects on you. You sound like a cold person, myob.

[Anonymous]

I think your obsession with your sister's newsfeed is bizarre. Take her out of your newsfeed if it bothers you so much.

[Anonymous]

Man here: OP, the purpose of your rant is to anonymously get people to listen to you. You're responding so I assume that you're getting something out of this whole exchange.

How is that any different than what your sister is doing on Facebook? At lease she has to courage to use her name in her posts.

[Anonymous]

OP, you sound like a truly terrible person. What makes you god and judge? No, you don’t confront her! What you need to do is MYOB and consider doing some counseling to learn kindest, compassion and boundaries.

[Anonymous]

Unfollow her and turn off notifications. The end.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Man here: OP, the purpose of your rant is to anonymously get people to listen to you. You're responding so I assume that you're getting something out of this whole exchange.

How is that any different than what your sister is doing on Facebook? At lease she has to courage to use her name in her posts.

+1

And how about trying to be a nice sister and ask her how things are going? Maybe a real convo will lead to her revealing that she feels isolated, sad, depressed. Maybe you’ll be able to gently push her to examine how she spends her time. Sounds like she needs a sister not a judge.

[Anonymous]

If your family won't keep it real with you, who will.