Nearly 17 year old son is sexually active

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:2 forms of birth control!!!!!

Teens are so fertile.They need birth control and back-up. I see patients as a women's health NP.

My own 18 year old son was sexually active with a girlfriend through much of senior year and this all made me very nervous because I really fear teen pregnancy. The guy has no control over the decision to terminate or not. I have girls too and the unwanted pregnancy concern was greater with my son because he wouldn't be the one making the decision.

Maybe in addition to the boy’s condoms, the girl could get one of those small iud’s made just for tweens / teen girls?

And so it starts...more responsibility placed on the girl

In the OP, the girl is already on birth control and they use protection.

Acc to OP’s son, of course.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Parents of 16 year olds having sex are terrible parents.

Eyeroll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Ok, cool story.

No you shouldn't tell her parents! Wtf. You also shouldn't tell the random internet but here we are.

This is a mind-boggling comment

[Anonymous]

No!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Impress upon him that he MUST use condoms regardless, and always treat her with respect and consideration. Then stay out of it.

This, 100% this, every single time, even if she is on birth control. And h@ll no, you do not tell her parents.

And are there any lawyers here? If he turns 18 while she is still 17, can he be arrested for statutory rate? That would be my worry

I don’t think so. Not for a continuous relationship that started when they were both minors

Not a lawyer tho

Also not a lawyer, but my understanding is it varies by state. In Virginia, minors within a certain age of each other (and over a certain age - maybe 14?) can have sex, but there’s no “Romeo and Juliet” law once one is 18. In other words, a 16 and 17 year old can have sex (if it’s close enough in age) but an 18 year old and 17 year old cannot.

In Maryland the Romeo and Juliet law is for someone within three years and it looks like the age of consent generally is 17.

I met my husband when I was 19 and he was 17. (We didn’t sleep together for 1.5 years). It’s weird to me that multiple people asked me if that means I raped him. It just so happens that we met in Massachusetts and I looked it up and the age of consent is 16, but back then this didn’t occur to me. The Romeo and Juliet law in Mass applies if you’re within 2 years of age. I’m just over two years older but, since we waited, it didn’t matter anyway. Teenage sex is complicated for so many reasons, but laws are for sure one of them!

Insane info here.

[Anonymous]

So he’s 16, then. Got it.

[Anonymous]

You’re responsible for your child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Impress upon him that he MUST use condoms regardless, and always treat her with respect and consideration. Then stay out of it.

This, 100% this, every single time, even if she is on birth control. And h@ll no, you do not tell her parents.

And are there any lawyers here? If he turns 18 while she is still 17, can he be arrested for statutory rate? That would be my worry

I don’t think so. Not for a continuous relationship that started when they were both minors

Not a lawyer tho

Also not a lawyer, but my understanding is it varies by state. In Virginia, minors within a certain age of each other (and over a certain age - maybe 14?) can have sex, but there’s no “Romeo and Juliet” law once one is 18. In other words, a 16 and 17 year old can have sex (if it’s close enough in age) but an 18 year old and 17 year old cannot.

In Maryland the Romeo and Juliet law is for someone within three years and it looks like the age of consent generally is 17.

I met my husband when I was 19 and he was 17. (We didn’t sleep together for 1.5 years). It’s weird to me that multiple people asked me if that means I raped him. It just so happens that we met in Massachusetts and I looked it up and the age of consent is 16, but back then this didn’t occur to me. The Romeo and Juliet law in Mass applies if you’re within 2 years of age. I’m just over two years older but, since we waited, it didn’t matter anyway. Teenage sex is complicated for so many reasons, but laws are for sure one of them!

Insane info here.

Girllllll . Agree 🫩

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Impress upon him that he MUST use condoms regardless, and always treat her with respect and consideration. Then stay out of it.

And make sure he knows he needs to wear a condom for every activity they are doing (not just PIV).

I'm not sure that's necessary if they were both virgins (meaning all sexual activity) prior. If not then, yes, good idea.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Ok, cool story.

No you shouldn't tell her parents! Wtf. You also shouldn't tell the random internet but here we are.

This is a mind-boggling comment

This is not mind boggling. I think the specifics of their ages and actual birth months is TMI!
Of course DCUM is a national board, but really if you know these kids you may know who she’s talking about…. Or at least think you do. If the GF mom reads here I can imagine her figuring out that this could possibly be about her DD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Parents of 16 year olds having sex are terrible parents.

Most 16 year olds have sex. Its a completely normal age to start.. There’s also a lot of kids who start at 14, or even 12, so, 16 is older than average.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My son, who will turn 17 in March, told me that he and his girlfriend—who is also turn 17 in a couple months, and whom he’s been dating for about eight months—are sexually active. He says she’s on birth control and that they’re using protection. He’s well informed about the risks, consent, and related issues, but I’m wondering if there’s anything else I should be doing.

Should I inform her parents? He says they already know and that I shouldn’t say anything, but I’m not completely sure that’s true.

Exactly how did he open this up? Mom, I am having sex every day with my GF?

[Anonymous]

Yes you tell them! They need to make sure their daughters being smart!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Impress upon him that he MUST use condoms regardless, and always treat her with respect and consideration. Then stay out of it.

This, 100% this, every single time, even if she is on birth control. And h@ll no, you do not tell her parents.

And are there any lawyers here? If he turns 18 while she is still 17, can he be arrested for statutory rate? That would be my worry

no way you said this like it was a legit question. really? really????
y’all are so consumed by this narrative of “false rape allegations” that you make them up when they were never in question.

[Anonymous]

I definitely don't want to discuss my female teenagers sex life with her boyfriends mother.