Nearly 17 year old son is sexually active

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Impress upon him that he MUST use condoms regardless, and always treat her with respect and consideration. Then stay out of it.

This, 100% this, every single time, even if she is on birth control. And h@ll no, you do not tell her parents.

And are there any lawyers here? If he turns 18 while she is still 17, can he be arrested for statutory rate? That would be my worry

I don’t think so. Not for a continuous relationship that started when they were both minors

Not a lawyer tho

Also not a lawyer, but my understanding is it varies by state. In Virginia, minors within a certain age of each other (and over a certain age - maybe 14?) can have sex, but there’s no “Romeo and Juliet” law once one is 18. In other words, a 16 and 17 year old can have sex (if it’s close enough in age) but an 18 year old and 17 year old cannot.

In Maryland the Romeo and Juliet law is for someone within three years and it looks like the age of consent generally is 17.

I met my husband when I was 19 and he was 17. (We didn’t sleep together for 1.5 years). It’s weird to me that multiple people asked me if that means I raped him. It just so happens that we met in Massachusetts and I looked it up and the age of consent is 16, but back then this didn’t occur to me. The Romeo and Juliet law in Mass applies if you’re within 2 years of age. I’m just over two years older but, since we waited, it didn’t matter anyway. Teenage sex is complicated for so many reasons, but laws are for sure one of them!

You people are bored idiots. Yes yes, the police are running around trying to arrest and convict a HS senior who dates a sophomore. You got it people, what a brain trust we have here on DCUM

I know someone who went to jail for this and is a registered sex offender to this day

The girl’s parents made sure of it

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So...no more AP Calculus BC? Just shagging?

Better be AP Calculus BCP

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So...no more AP Calculus BC? Just shagging?

I believe the prior-person was trying to just be humorous here. But in humor there is often some truth. In my country, the schoolchildren are not permitted to engage in this sort of foolishness. No.

High school is the time for studying. The marriage and the relationships will come later. Pupils must put their utmost focus on their studies.

Your country has teenage pregnancy just like any where else and it’s probably worse, it’s likely arranged marriages with little kids

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Impress upon him that he MUST use condoms regardless, and always treat her with respect and consideration. Then stay out of it.

This, 100% this, every single time, even if she is on birth control. And h@ll no, you do not tell her parents.

And are there any lawyers here? If he turns 18 while she is still 17, can he be arrested for statutory rate? That would be my worry

I don’t think so. Not for a continuous relationship that started when they were both minors

Not a lawyer tho

Also not a lawyer, but my understanding is it varies by state. In Virginia, minors within a certain age of each other (and over a certain age - maybe 14?) can have sex, but there’s no “Romeo and Juliet” law once one is 18. In other words, a 16 and 17 year old can have sex (if it’s close enough in age) but an 18 year old and 17 year old cannot.

In Maryland the Romeo and Juliet law is for someone within three years and it looks like the age of consent generally is 17.

I met my husband when I was 19 and he was 17. (We didn’t sleep together for 1.5 years). It’s weird to me that multiple people asked me if that means I raped him. It just so happens that we met in Massachusetts and I looked it up and the age of consent is 16, but back then this didn’t occur to me. The Romeo and Juliet law in Mass applies if you’re within 2 years of age. I’m just over two years older but, since we waited, it didn’t matter anyway. Teenage sex is complicated for so many reasons, but laws are for sure one of them!

You people are bored idiots. Yes yes, the police are running around trying to arrest and convict a HS senior who dates a sophomore. You got it people, what a brain trust we have here on DCUM

I know someone who went to jail for this and is a registered sex offender to this day

The girl’s parents made sure of it

That’s insane. At that age two year age gaps are very common.

[Anonymous]

Do not tell her parents. Buy Plan B and condoms. Your son needs to help out with birth control.

[Anonymous]

No you don’t have to tell the girls mother.

But I ll make sure my son know what sex means exactly.
1 sex is an act of conceives. Result is pregnancy and offspring, is he prepared for the consequences?
If he can barely responsibly for himself unable to take care of another person, bring another human into this world, impregnate another human, is irresponsible. It’s not love. It’s selfish.

2. Minor. Both are still minor. Being a male counterpart, the risk that the son will be accuse of having sexual violation to his gf his higher than the opposite. So no , don’t risk putting yourself in this position

3. If he doesn’t care about above, he needs to wear condom. Preventing pregnancy is both party responsibility not just the girl. Protecting himself from std is his responsibility.
Be responsible! Otherwise he s too young to have sex.

My son is 13 years old, I have many time goes over above 3 points with him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents of 16 year olds having sex are terrible parents.

Most 16 year olds have sex. Its a completely normal age to start.. There’s also a lot of kids who start at 14, or even 12, so, 16 is older than average.

source?

They don’t have one, because it’s not true.

This report is around 20 years old, but the trend has been fewer teens engaging in these behaviors:

“ • By age 15, only 13% of teens have ever had sex.”

“ • The proportion of teens who had ever
had sex declined from 49% to 46% among females and from 55% to 46% among males between 1995 and 2002.”

https://www.guttmacher.org/sites/default/files/pdfs/pubs/fb_ATSRH.pdf

Why is everyone speculating, or citing surveys from 2002, when:

- our children’s school system surveys and publishes the latest statistics on this very issue?

Here is the scientifically collected and tabulated results from the school system itself:

https://www.fairfaxcounty.gov/data/sites/data/files/Assets/documents/youth%20survey/survey%20reports/2024_Fairfax_8_12th_FINAL.pdf

Oh please nobody tells the truth on those anonymous school surveys which have your student number right on top every page

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents of 16 year olds having sex are terrible parents.

Most 16 year olds have sex. Its a completely normal age to start.. There’s also a lot of kids who start at 14, or even 12, so, 16 is older than average.

source?

They don’t have one, because it’s not true.

This report is around 20 years old, but the trend has been fewer teens engaging in these behaviors:

“ • By age 15, only 13% of teens have ever had sex.”

“ • The proportion of teens who had ever
had sex declined from 49% to 46% among females and from 55% to 46% among males between 1995 and 2002.”

https://www.guttmacher.org/sites/default/files/pdfs/pubs/fb_ATSRH.pdf

Why is everyone speculating, or citing surveys from 2002, when:

- our children’s school system surveys and publishes the latest statistics on this very issue?

Here is the scientifically collected and tabulated results from the school system itself:

https://www.fairfaxcounty.gov/data/sites/data/files/Assets/documents/youth%20survey/survey%20reports/2024_Fairfax_8_12th_FINAL.pdf

Oh please nobody tells the truth on those anonymous school surveys which have your student number right on top every page

I'm startled the school is asking such intrusive questions. I would consider that a violation of their mandate, which is to teach. Not to be looking into very private sexual behavior. Sheesh.

[Anonymous]

A PP mentioned always wearing a condom to circumvent girls who purposely want to get pregnant and might be lax with the pill.

You should also teach your son how to properly dispose of the contents of a condom. It is not unheard of for girls with the secret goal of pregnancy to fish the condoms out of the trash and well, you can fill in the rest.

[Anonymous]

Trashy, trashy, trashy families

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Parents of 16 year olds having sex are terrible parents.

Most 16 year olds have sex. Its a completely normal age to start.. There’s also a lot of kids who start at 14, or even 12, so, 16 is older than average.

source?

It was like this in my Ohio suburban school. Not impoverished, not rich. Most kids start bullying other kids for not doing it by 15 or sophomore year. Most kids start at 14 in freshman year, and I remember still being a virgin junior year, and one 14 year old freshmen on my bus, thought it was cool to tell others that they already did it with 7 people at 14!! It was like November?! I was shocked.

You are aware that kids lie? I mean, how would anyone know who actually did and didn’t have sex at 15?

[Anonymous]

How strange question. F no don't tell them. Be glad he told you.

[Anonymous]

Anyone notice the huge cultural disconnect in this thread?

The parents born and raised here in America are far more accepting of the possibility of teenage sex.

The parents raised in other cultures, but trying to raise teens here in the USA, have completely opposite views of teen sex.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone notice the huge cultural disconnect in this thread?

The parents born and raised here in America are far more accepting of the possibility of teenage sex.

The parents raised in other cultures, but trying to raise teens here in the USA, have completely opposite views of teen sex.

I think it's less accepting and more acknowledging. My SIL is from a culture of "my kids would NEVER have sex before marriage". And my brother somewhat assimilated to her culture. Both her kids had sex as teenagers and came to me for questions and help. It's such a disservice to your kids to bury your head in the sand and think your kid would never do something

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Anyone notice the huge cultural disconnect in this thread?

The parents born and raised here in America are far more accepting of the possibility of teenage sex.

The parents raised in other cultures, but trying to raise teens here in the USA, have completely opposite views of teen sex.

Wrong. I was born and raised here and I think it’s terrible that this parent is ok with her son doing this as a minor to a minor. She cannot consent. Her parents should know she’s being meddled with without consent. Also, the focus should be on academics at this stage, this is a parent fail.