Strange comment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you are totally out of line. Also, wrong. Gifts from parents aren't marital property. Nor are inheritances if you were hoping to cash in some day.

You sound like your husband's affair partner who became his second wife.



Showing your overt greed is not a good look. You better be prepared to grovel to his MIL and make it look sincere to put things right. But she will likely never trust you. Nor should she. Your entitlement level is "11".

So a good relationship I had with MIL for years is shattered because of one comment?? That's not how family works.

Based on your continual self righteous responses, I don't think this type of behavior from you is an isolated event. This might be the straw that broke the back of your relationship. If I were your MIL, I would be permanently distancing myself from you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you are totally out of line. Also, wrong. Gifts from parents aren't marital property. Nor are inheritances if you were hoping to cash in some day.

You sound like your husband's affair partner who became his second wife.



Showing your overt greed is not a good look. You better be prepared to grovel to his MIL and make it look sincere to put things right. But she will likely never trust you. Nor should she. Your entitlement level is "11".

So a good relationship I had with MIL for years is shattered because of one comment?? That's not how family works.

You have a lot of very strong opinions about how family works. Actually, there are as many ways to be a family as there are families in the world. You're not the arbiter of all of them, precious, including your in-laws' family.

[Anonymous]

So, he opened a card, and as soon as you saw it was $$ you (verbally, but still) reached out and took the money while stating what it would be used for?

Even if this was the end use, what a horrible way to go about it. No wonder they are upset.

[Anonymous]

Your comment was strange, OP. MIL did nothing wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you are totally out of line. Also, wrong. Gifts from parents aren't marital property. Nor are inheritances if you were hoping to cash in some day.

You sound like your husband's affair partner who became his second wife.



Showing your overt greed is not a good look. You better be prepared to grovel to his MIL and make it look sincere to put things right. But she will likely never trust you. Nor should she. Your entitlement level is "11".

So a good relationship I had with MIL for years is shattered because of one comment?? That's not how family works.

Not if you just apologize and let it go!! The relationship will not be shattered by the comment but it will be shattered by your obstinate behavior.

[Anonymous]

Woah... you were out of line by inserting your comment instead of letting DH graciously accept the gift. You made an assumption on how he wanted to use it. I would guess, based on MILs reaction, that you often try to be in control and/or speak for him. She probably finally snapped.

You say:

Not to mention it shouldn't be up to the gift giver to determine how the money is spent. For us we are married so it's more of a we are a unit and make these decisions together we are one in the married sense.

Flipping this to say it shouldn't be up to a third party (YOU!) to decide how HIS gift should be spent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you are totally out of line. Also, wrong. Gifts from parents aren't marital property. Nor are inheritances if you were hoping to cash in some day.

You sound like your husband's affair partner who became his second wife.



Showing your overt greed is not a good look. You better be prepared to grovel to his MIL and make it look sincere to put things right. But she will likely never trust you. Nor should she. Your entitlement level is "11".

So a good relationship I had with MIL for years is shattered because of one comment?? That's not how family works.

Based on your continual self righteous responses, I don't think this type of behavior from you is an isolated event. This might be the straw that broke the back of your relationship. If I were your MIL, I would be permanently distancing myself from you.

+1

[Anonymous]

Pick your battles-
This is not one of them.

[Anonymous]

You were the first one who was rude (you really shouldn't have been saying anything at all since it's your husband's gift and not your place to comment on in front of the gift giver unless you just want to say something like 'wow that's so generous of you" or "what a nice gift!") but your MIL shouldn't have given you a nasty look or made her comment either. Of course money is shared by the married couple/family unit and I'm sure your MIL knows that but in the moment, she's intending it as a gift for her son and you--since you are not her son/the gift recipient-- really don't have a role to play in that moment.

[Anonymous]

Wow, these answers astound me. When my parents give me money, it goes into the joint account.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, these answers astound me. When my parents give me money, it goes into the joint account.

Same, but I don't discuss that in front of MIL. OP commandeered the gift which was rude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, these answers astound me. When my parents give me money, it goes into the joint account.

Of course but that doesn't mean you comment on it when your spouse opens the gift in front of the gift giver!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wow, these answers astound me. When my parents give me money, it goes into the joint account.

That's fine, nobody has a problem with that. The issue is how OP handled it and behaved--poorly.

[Anonymous]

Wow OP, all I can say is that I really hope my sons don't marry someone like you. Everything you have written makes you sound entitled, self righteous, and nasty. Just awful.

[Anonymous]

YTA. Are you so unmannered in other areas of your life?