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Anonymous
This. |
Anonymous
| YATA. Your comment was rude. You don’t lay claim to someone’s birthday money even your spouses. Then you browbeat your dh into getting his mom to apologize to you. You sound like an abusive controlling spouse. Go Get some therapy, |
Anonymous
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OP you are totally out of line. Also, wrong. Gifts from parents aren't marital property. Nor are inheritances if you were hoping to cash in some day.
You sound like your husband's affair partner who became his second wife. Showing your overt greed is not a good look. You better be prepared to grovel to his MIL and make it look sincere to put things right. But she will likely never trust you. Nor should she. Your entitlement level is "11". |
Anonymous
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Come back OP! We want to hear what you think now after all these comments.
I too think you were very rude. Your MIL gave that money to your DH, so it is up to him to decide what to spend it on (maybe he really wants a new golf club or laptop, but felt guilty suggesting it because of the expectation you have that what's his is yours?). Can you imagine how it would appear if it were the other way around, and your DH immediately told you how money that your parent gave you should be spent? Wouldn't you say that was controlling behavior? I would. |
Anonymous
| Is this even real? Are you the mil posting because you paint OP as a cartoon villain. It's OUR money, storms out and makes dh request apology. |
Anonymous
| OP: You were excited by the gift, but you spoke too early and in front of the MIL gift giver. Your MIL does not think that it is her duty to pay for your house improvements. You cheated the MIL out of her joy of giving a great gift. |
Anonymous
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Agree that you were rude and MIL does not owe you an apology. I can understand what you blurted out when DH opened the envelope because it was impulsive- even though it was wrong. Your MIL correctly responded, and your response to her was flat-out rude, even if true. And I say all this as someone who agrees generally that marital funds are shared, but thinks a birthday gift is just that - a gift to the recipient and not the couple. Just because it’s cash doesn’t change that.
Now the real question - posters almost unanimously are telling you that you were wrong. Will you own it and apologize to your MIL, since you clearly believe someone in this scenario deserves an apology? |
Anonymous
| There is not one post backing OP up. She prob won’t post again. Unless she is self aware, and realizes the mistake was hers. I’d be impressed with that. |
Anonymous
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Yikes OP. Agree with everyone that in a nice moment between mother and son, you jumped in with a greedy comment having already decided what to do with your husbands gift before he had the chance. Then doubled down!
What would your mil even apologize for?her comment was just factual. Not nasty. You should apologize or at very least tell your husband not to raise it with his mom. Even when spouses share things, come on - if your mil had given him a slice of cake would you have jumped forward and bitten it immediately before he had a chance? |
Anonymous
How was it overstepping and getting between them? I'm married to the man this is something that benefits both of us. Most married couples share money especially large amounts like that. If anything she was getting in between our marriage by sticking her nose in a comment I made to my HUSBAND that wasn't hers to comment on |
Anonymous
| Op you overstepped and were rude. You basically called dibs on his birthday present in front of the giver. That's poor form and you know it. Can't blame MIL for calling you out. |
Anonymous
Because it was a comment I made to my husband and not her therefore she doesn't get an opinion on it or commentary. She doesn't know what my husband and I have discussed extra money being used towards or what our financial agreement is. A lot of married couples do share finances. We have a what's yours is mine attitude. I don't think our finances and the comments I make to my husband are for MIL to comment on. And yes if I got $1000 for my birthday from my mother I would expect that I would share it with my husband. I am aware that a lot of women expect their husbands to share their money while they themselves don't do share but I do share in our marriage. |
Anonymous
Wow, you're a piece of work. |
Anonymous
I bet that’s OP |
Anonymous
You don’t look better with this follow up OP. You were rude, but you’ll never see it. Oh well. |