Upstairs is off-limits to guests

[Anonymous]

Another team OP here. I don't act that way in someone's house, nor do I expect a guest to act that way. Be polite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree about party guests. But I would never tell my parents or my husband’s parents they are not welcome upstairs in my home.

Unless they are invited, or ask for something and told it is OK, what do they need up there?

They have living space, kitchen, bathroom, bedroom available to them. What do they need?

Bathrooms are frequently in use.

So quietly ask if you can go upstairs.

Or...wait! Most adults don’t hold it until they are bursting, grasping between their legs and hopping from foot to foot like a toddler.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Are they maybe wanting company or looking for some kind of supplies like tampons, towels or the laundry room?

I’ll bet big bucks it’s one of OP’s inlaws whom she doesn’t like in general. To OP, the guest is being “nosy.”

OP here. I've had both members of my family and my husband's familly do this. I've also had near-strangers do this, who were invited for a holiday party. I don't get how people don't get that this is not how you act in someone's home.

Is this a townhouse? With vertical living space the rules change a bit. I would think nothing of going upstairs.

No, it’s a 3-level SFH. Basement is fully finished with guest bedroom, sitting area with TV, laundry and private full bath for guest. Public main level has powder room, kitchen, living room, parlor and dining room.

You don’t need to be upstairs for any reason.

[Anonymous]

I would be completely creeped out by a visitor wandering upstairs without being shown/directed (which would include anything like an upstairs laundry room)--only if, say, they were visiting with their kids who were upstairs playing with my kids.

When I have visited friends in their new (to them or just new) homes, I think I have always been shown the house--my bedrooms are all upstairs anyway so a tour is moot. It didn't occur to me that maybe their intent was to make it clear there was no meth lab, terrorist cell, or dead body. But I have had guests decide to check out the third floor attic (finished but not used as living space) which is offensive.

So would guest inspecting your bedroom closet be ok? opening drawers?

OP I would suggest giving them a brief tour which will indicate there is nothing for them up there. They shouldn't be rummaging for things they need either.

If it's a party, who's to say? They don't know where the coats ended up? They can't find their 2-yo? They're drunk and think they're home? They're looking for a spot to hook up? Probably gonna happen but I wouldn't want it. Things could go missing, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree about party guests. But I would never tell my parents or my husband’s parents they are not welcome upstairs in my home.

Unless they are invited, or ask for something and told it is OK, what do they need up there?

They have living space, kitchen, bathroom, bedroom available to them. What do they need?

Bathrooms are frequently in use.

So quietly ask if you can go upstairs.

Or...wait! Most adults don’t hold it until they are bursting, grasping between their legs and hopping from foot to foot like a toddler.

Exaggeration much? Makes your argument far less credible.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree about party guests. But I would never tell my parents or my husband’s parents they are not welcome upstairs in my home.

Unless they are invited, or ask for something and told it is OK, what do they need up there?

They have living space, kitchen, bathroom, bedroom available to them. What do they need?

Bathrooms are frequently in use.

So quietly ask if you can go upstairs.

Or...wait! Most adults don’t hold it until they are bursting, grasping between their legs and hopping from foot to foot like a toddler.

Exaggeration much? Makes your argument far less credible.

Tell me one good reason why and able-bodied, healthy, non-elderly guest can’t wait 5 minutes for the bathroom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree about party guests. But I would never tell my parents or my husband’s parents they are not welcome upstairs in my home.

Unless they are invited, or ask for something and told it is OK, what do they need up there?

They have living space, kitchen, bathroom, bedroom available to them. What do they need?

Bathrooms are frequently in use.

So quietly ask if you can go upstairs.

Or...wait! Most adults don’t hold it until they are bursting, grasping between their legs and hopping from foot to foot like a toddler.

Exaggeration much? Makes your argument far less credible.

Tell me one good reason why and able-bodied, healthy, non-elderly guest can’t wait 5 minutes for the bathroom.

Because the person in there is taking too long? Give me a f-ing break like you’ve never had to go pretty bad, yet it doesn’t make you a bursting toddler. I actually hope that the next time you have to go, you pee yourself, you nasty person.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Agree about party guests. But I would never tell my parents or my husband’s parents they are not welcome upstairs in my home.

Unless they are invited, or ask for something and told it is OK, what do they need up there?

They have living space, kitchen, bathroom, bedroom available to them. What do they need?

Bathrooms are frequently in use.

So quietly ask if you can go upstairs.

Or...wait! Most adults don’t hold it until they are bursting, grasping between their legs and hopping from foot to foot like a toddler.

Exaggeration much? Makes your argument far less credible.

Tell me one good reason why and able-bodied, healthy, non-elderly guest can’t wait 5 minutes for the bathroom.

Because the person in there is taking too long? Give me a f-ing break like you’ve never had to go pretty bad, yet it doesn’t make you a bursting toddler. I actually hope that the next time you have to go, you pee yourself, you nasty person.

Soonick gently. Or discreetly ask your host to go upstairs.

Haven’t remotely come close to “peeing myself” since I was 3, thanks.

[Anonymous]

^^So knock.

[Anonymous]

if you liked the guest, you wouldn’t much care.

[Anonymous]

Our bedroom is off the dining room. Several times, my son will be running around the house with a friend and wind up in our room with his friend. I hate that. Worse, when the parent follows them in. Inevitably, the child will look around and say something awkward like "is that your underwear on the bed?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our bedroom is off the dining room. Several times, my son will be running around the house with a friend and wind up in our room with his friend. I hate that. Worse, when the parent follows them in. Inevitably, the child will look around and say something awkward like "is that your underwear on the bed?"

Um, if this is a known reality, why are your underwear on the bed, or why isn’t the door locked?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:if you liked the guest, you wouldn’t much care.

Not OP, and No, quite the opposite. Lose respect for someone that doesn’t respect my personal space.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Tell me one good reason why and able-bodied, healthy, non-elderly guest can’t wait 5 minutes for the bathroom.

1. Because they had a few drinks too many.
2. Because something they ate is not agreeing with them.
3. Because suddenly they don't feel so healthy.

Oh wait you wanted one...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Tell me one good reason why and able-bodied, healthy, non-elderly guest can’t wait 5 minutes for the bathroom.

1. Because they had a few drinks too many.
2. Because something they ate is not agreeing with them.
3. Because suddenly they don't feel so healthy.

Oh wait you wanted one...

1) I don’t throw keggers.
2) That qualifies as “not healthy.”
3) Again some more, already mentioned health.