Weigh in on this parenting diagreement

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that you have to consider how you would like to be treated and treat your children that way.

So many times people act like tweens and teens are from a different planet. If it were you being dropped off so early would you like it? When you are in the nursing home, will you mind waiting in the foyer to be picked up (in your wheelchair) for over 2 hours to suit someone else?

What exactly is it that you husband is trying to teach your son? That he better get used to getting the short stick in the family? I just don't get these other parent's comments.

Are you seriously trying to compare an elderly person who can't wait and is physically dependent on other people for their most basic needs to a healthy 16 year old boy managing his time?

It's about being kind to all family members and helping make life easier when able.
I am not the PP you replied to.

What would be really kind is if you just stopped expected him to go to school at all. I mean, it's a lot of work and I'm sure if you asked him, he'd agree that he'd be happier not to go.

You make no sense. Do YOU want to wait three hours for a drive after work?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that you have to consider how you would like to be treated and treat your children that way.

So many times people act like tweens and teens are from a different planet. If it were you being dropped off so early would you like it? When you are in the nursing home, will you mind waiting in the foyer to be picked up (in your wheelchair) for over 2 hours to suit someone else?

What exactly is it that you husband is trying to teach your son? That he better get used to getting the short stick in the family? I just don't get these other parent's comments.

.

THANK YOU!!!!
That's how I view it, I would hate to wait around like that.

That's right! Turn your son into a pampered princess because that's how you want to be treated!

Take him out for a pedicure and some wine, too. After all, it's how you would like to be treated, right? No need to think about his development as a person or learning how to deal with less-than-desirable circumstances or overcome obstacles when we can just be caving in to hedonism all the time!

This is a troll. Don't feed the trolls.

How about the other option, that behaving as a considerate person towards your children, sets the example for them to be considerate towards others. And what development are you talking about anyway? Do you actually think that making a teen wait at school is character building? You sound like a very nasty person. I hope they make you wait at the nursing home ALL DAY because that's the way you taught your children to treat people.

Aw, you are lonely and you need to attack people on the internet to feel better, huh? That's sad.

Spoiling your kids doesn't make them act considerate to others. It makes them act like entitled douchebags. Probably yours are like this and that's why you're so sad and bitter. I'm sorry they don't respect you, but it looks like it's for the right reasons.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think that you have to consider how you would like to be treated and treat your children that way.

So many times people act like tweens and teens are from a different planet. If it were you being dropped off so early would you like it? When you are in the nursing home, will you mind waiting in the foyer to be picked up (in your wheelchair) for over 2 hours to suit someone else?

What exactly is it that you husband is trying to teach your son? That he better get used to getting the short stick in the family? I just don't get these other parent's comments.

If it were me, I wouldn't expect someone to rearrange their days to unnecessarily drive me somewhere I could easily get to a few hours earlier when I need time to do work anyway. But I'm 35. If I were 16, I might be annoyed because I'd rather stay home and watch tv. While I might know on some level that it would be better for the family for my parent to stay home and work, and not waste gas, I wouldn't necessarily care to the point that it trumped my desire to watch tv. 16 year olds can be pretty self absorbed.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that you have to consider how you would like to be treated and treat your children that way.

So many times people act like tweens and teens are from a different planet. If it were you being dropped off so early would you like it? When you are in the nursing home, will you mind waiting in the foyer to be picked up (in your wheelchair) for over 2 hours to suit someone else?

What exactly is it that you husband is trying to teach your son? That he better get used to getting the short stick in the family? I just don't get these other parent's comments.

.

THANK YOU!!!!
That's how I view it, I would hate to wait around like that.

That's right! Turn your son into a pampered princess because that's how you want to be treated!

Take him out for a pedicure and some wine, too. After all, it's how you would like to be treated, right? No need to think about his development as a person or learning how to deal with less-than-desirable circumstances or overcome obstacles when we can just be caving in to hedonism all the time!

This is a troll. Don't feed the trolls.

How about the other option, that behaving as a considerate person towards your children, sets the example for them to be considerate towards others. And what development are you talking about anyway? Do you actually think that making a teen wait at school is character building? You sound like a very nasty person. I hope they make you wait at the nursing home ALL DAY because that's the way you taught your children to treat people.

Aw, you are lonely and you need to attack people on the internet to feel better, huh? That's sad.

Spoiling your kids doesn't make them act considerate to others. It makes them act like entitled douchebags. Probably yours are like this and that's why you're so sad and bitter. I'm sorry they don't respect you, but it looks like it's for the right reasons.

Troll.

[Anonymous]

Surely a 16 yo high school student has enough homework to keep him busy for a couple of hours every day?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that you have to consider how you would like to be treated and treat your children that way.

So many times people act like tweens and teens are from a different planet. If it were you being dropped off so early would you like it? When you are in the nursing home, will you mind waiting in the foyer to be picked up (in your wheelchair) for over 2 hours to suit someone else?

What exactly is it that you husband is trying to teach your son? That he better get used to getting the short stick in the family? I just don't get these other parent's comments.

Are you seriously trying to compare an elderly person who can't wait and is physically dependent on other people for their most basic needs to a healthy 16 year old boy managing his time?

It's about being kind to all family members and helping make life easier when able.
I am not the PP you replied to.

What would be really kind is if you just stopped expected him to go to school at all. I mean, it's a lot of work and I'm sure if you asked him, he'd agree that he'd be happier not to go.

You make no sense. Do YOU want to wait three hours for a drive after work?

I really don't understand the people making a big deal about this. Kid needs to do homework, yes? Is there ANY logical reason he shouldn't take this opportunity to do it in the mornings? Really, the answer is no. OP said he'd use the time at home playing video games. I'm sure the school has a library. With internet access. If he wants to spend the time surfing the internet and wasting his time, he can do that too. In fact, there are probably other kids at the school who also will be starting class weirdly late and he can hang out with them. It's not like dad will be dropping him off to sit on a curb in front of the school twiddling his thumbs until the bell rings and he's allowed to trot inside. Are you people just not able to think rationally? It has nothing to do with imposing your big bad will on the poor widdle teenager. It's just figuring out the logistics in a reasonable manner.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that you have to consider how you would like to be treated and treat your children that way.

So many times people act like tweens and teens are from a different planet. If it were you being dropped off so early would you like it? When you are in the nursing home, will you mind waiting in the foyer to be picked up (in your wheelchair) for over 2 hours to suit someone else?

What exactly is it that you husband is trying to teach your son? That he better get used to getting the short stick in the family? I just don't get these other parent's comments.

Are you seriously trying to compare an elderly person who can't wait and is physically dependent on other people for their most basic needs to a healthy 16 year old boy managing his time?

It's about being kind to all family members and helping make life easier when able.
I am not the PP you replied to.

What would be really kind is if you just stopped expected him to go to school at all. I mean, it's a lot of work and I'm sure if you asked him, he'd agree that he'd be happier not to go.

You make no sense. Do YOU want to wait three hours for a drive after work?

I really don't understand the people making a big deal about this. Kid needs to do homework, yes? Is there ANY logical reason he shouldn't take this opportunity to do it in the mornings? Really, the answer is no. OP said he'd use the time at home playing video games. I'm sure the school has a library. With internet access. If he wants to spend the time surfing the internet and wasting his time, he can do that too. In fact, there are probably other kids at the school who also will be starting class weirdly late and he can hang out with them. It's not like dad will be dropping him off to sit on a curb in front of the school twiddling his thumbs until the bell rings and he's allowed to trot inside. Are you people just not able to think rationally? It has nothing to do with imposing your big bad will on the poor widdle teenager. It's just figuring out the logistics in a reasonable manner.

OP here, I actually said that at school he would probably spend the time playing on his computer but thats just a guess.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that you have to consider how you would like to be treated and treat your children that way.

So many times people act like tweens and teens are from a different planet. If it were you being dropped off so early would you like it? When you are in the nursing home, will you mind waiting in the foyer to be picked up (in your wheelchair) for over 2 hours to suit someone else?

What exactly is it that you husband is trying to teach your son? That he better get used to getting the short stick in the family? I just don't get these other parent's comments.

Are you seriously trying to compare an elderly person who can't wait and is physically dependent on other people for their most basic needs to a healthy 16 year old boy managing his time?

It's about being kind to all family members and helping make life easier when able.
I am not the PP you replied to.

What would be really kind is if you just stopped expected him to go to school at all. I mean, it's a lot of work and I'm sure if you asked him, he'd agree that he'd be happier not to go.

You make no sense. Do YOU want to wait three hours for a drive after work?

Are you really saying that an adult with (presumably) better things to do should rearrange their day and drive 45 minutes just so that a 16-year-old can relax more? Are you so old you really can't remember that most of a high-schooler's life is school, schoolwork, and then hours of time to relax?

Plenty of us did harder things as 16-year-olds to help out our families. 3 hours per day is not a huge sacrifice or time commitment when school is pretty much the only thing in your life. I mean, I'm assuming from OP's post he's not working a necessary part-time job to help his parents pay the bills or supporting a family of his own while volunteering 20 hours a week as a candy striper. This kid sounds like most 16-year-olds and 3 hours in the morning that's set aside to do his school work will allow him to relax and play in the evenings instead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that you have to consider how you would like to be treated and treat your children that way.

So many times people act like tweens and teens are from a different planet. If it were you being dropped off so early would you like it? When you are in the nursing home, will you mind waiting in the foyer to be picked up (in your wheelchair) for over 2 hours to suit someone else?

What exactly is it that you husband is trying to teach your son? That he better get used to getting the short stick in the family? I just don't get these other parent's comments.

Are you seriously trying to compare an elderly person who can't wait and is physically dependent on other people for their most basic needs to a healthy 16 year old boy managing his time?

It's about being kind to all family members and helping make life easier when able.
I am not the PP you replied to.

What would be really kind is if you just stopped expected him to go to school at all. I mean, it's a lot of work and I'm sure if you asked him, he'd agree that he'd be happier not to go.

You make no sense. Do YOU want to wait three hours for a drive after work?

I really don't understand the people making a big deal about this. Kid needs to do homework, yes? Is there ANY logical reason he shouldn't take this opportunity to do it in the mornings? Really, the answer is no. OP said he'd use the time at home playing video games. I'm sure the school has a library. With internet access. If he wants to spend the time surfing the internet and wasting his time, he can do that too. In fact, there are probably other kids at the school who also will be starting class weirdly late and he can hang out with them. It's not like dad will be dropping him off to sit on a curb in front of the school twiddling his thumbs until the bell rings and he's allowed to trot inside. Are you people just not able to think rationally? It has nothing to do with imposing your big bad will on the poor widdle teenager. It's just figuring out the logistics in a reasonable manner.

OP here, I actually said that at school he would probably spend the time playing on his computer but thats just a guess.

Well then I'm sorry you didn't raise him right. Sounds like he's already spoiled and a lost cause.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that you have to consider how you would like to be treated and treat your children that way.

So many times people act like tweens and teens are from a different planet. If it were you being dropped off so early would you like it? When you are in the nursing home, will you mind waiting in the foyer to be picked up (in your wheelchair) for over 2 hours to suit someone else?

What exactly is it that you husband is trying to teach your son? That he better get used to getting the short stick in the family? I just don't get these other parent's comments.

.

THANK YOU!!!!
That's how I view it, I would hate to wait around like that.

He's trying to teach his son that the world doesn't revolve around him.

We as parents are not really doing them a favor by being "considerate" all the time. I put "considerate" in quotes because there is a line between being "considerate" and spoiling your kids, or treating them like they are fragile and can't have any hardships in their lives. We are constantly removing any tiny hardships that comes across their paths. It's making these kids not able to handle any inconvenience, small or large.

I tell my kids I won't drive them to school even though it's really close by, that they can take the school bus, even though that takes longer because 1. why add to the congestion around here 2. why use gas when I don't need to 3. every time we get in the car we add to the air pollution

In the grand scheme of things, this isn't a huge issue, and that's probably why OP's husband doesn't care one way or the other. But, I think we are catering to our kids too much sometimes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that you have to consider how you would like to be treated and treat your children that way.

So many times people act like tweens and teens are from a different planet. If it were you being dropped off so early would you like it? When you are in the nursing home, will you mind waiting in the foyer to be picked up (in your wheelchair) for over 2 hours to suit someone else?

What exactly is it that you husband is trying to teach your son? That he better get used to getting the short stick in the family? I just don't get these other parent's comments.

Are you seriously trying to compare an elderly person who can't wait and is physically dependent on other people for their most basic needs to a healthy 16 year old boy managing his time?

It's about being kind to all family members and helping make life easier when able.
I am not the PP you replied to.

What would be really kind is if you just stopped expected him to go to school at all. I mean, it's a lot of work and I'm sure if you asked him, he'd agree that he'd be happier not to go.

You make no sense. Do YOU want to wait three hours for a drive after work?

Are you really saying that an adult with (presumably) better things to do should rearrange their day and drive 45 minutes just so that a 16-year-old can relax more? Are you so old you really can't remember that most of a high-schooler's life is school, schoolwork, and then hours of time to relax?

Plenty of us did harder things as 16-year-olds to help out our families. 3 hours per day is not a huge sacrifice or time commitment when school is pretty much the only thing in your life. I mean, I'm assuming from OP's post he's not working a necessary part-time job to help his parents pay the bills or supporting a family of his own while volunteering 20 hours a week as a candy striper. This kid sounds like most 16-year-olds and 3 hours in the morning that's set aside to do his school work will allow him to relax and play in the evenings instead.

OP here.
I get it if I am working in that day. But if I am off anyway, it feels cruel to not be bothered to pick him up. Driving isn't a huge deal for me.

[Anonymous]

I meant it would feel cruel not to DROP HIM OFF, not pick him up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think that you have to consider how you would like to be treated and treat your children that way.

So many times people act like tweens and teens are from a different planet. If it were you being dropped off so early would you like it? When you are in the nursing home, will you mind waiting in the foyer to be picked up (in your wheelchair) for over 2 hours to suit someone else?

What exactly is it that you husband is trying to teach your son? That he better get used to getting the short stick in the family? I just don't get these other parent's comments.

Are you seriously trying to compare an elderly person who can't wait and is physically dependent on other people for their most basic needs to a healthy 16 year old boy managing his time?

It's about being kind to all family members and helping make life easier when able.
I am not the PP you replied to.

What would be really kind is if you just stopped expected him to go to school at all. I mean, it's a lot of work and I'm sure if you asked him, he'd agree that he'd be happier not to go.

You make no sense. Do YOU want to wait three hours for a drive after work?

I really don't understand the people making a big deal about this. Kid needs to do homework, yes? Is there ANY logical reason he shouldn't take this opportunity to do it in the mornings? Really, the answer is no. OP said he'd use the time at home playing video games. I'm sure the school has a library. With internet access. If he wants to spend the time surfing the internet and wasting his time, he can do that too. In fact, there are probably other kids at the school who also will be starting class weirdly late and he can hang out with them. It's not like dad will be dropping him off to sit on a curb in front of the school twiddling his thumbs until the bell rings and he's allowed to trot inside. Are you people just not able to think rationally? It has nothing to do with imposing your big bad will on the poor widdle teenager. It's just figuring out the logistics in a reasonable manner.

OP here, I actually said that at school he would probably spend the time playing on his computer but thats just a guess.

Well then I'm sorry you didn't raise him right. Sounds like he's already spoiled and a lost cause.

Yes he is a lost cause because he is a normal teen boy who likes playing on his computer while maintaining a straight A average.

[Anonymous]

So many cold selfish parents out there.

[Anonymous]

So many pathetic helicopter moms out there.