MIL doesn’t understand the cost of life

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What are you talking about. You sound pretty difficult and entitled. You choose to spend a lot, as you can go to the beach for far less.

We rented a house at the beach for a week, $5k is on the low end with inflation these days

There are other ways to vacation other than expensive beach houses. You act like it's a requirement. Your MIL might be confused because she might not be sure if you're asking for money in a roundabout way to fund the exorbitant lifestyle.

No we are not asking for money but when she says she wishes my DH didn’t work so hard that frustrates me.

Yes, DH is stressed out and under pressure but he is reaping the rewards slowly but surely.

Maybe you should consider what she's saying and life isn't always about the money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you discuss money with her?

We often talk about work bc it takes up a big part of our life. It’s just hard to relate to someone who never had to work hard.

Do you hear yourself? Do you really think that only someone who has your kind of job does hard work? Get out of your $5K/week beach vacay bubble sweet heart.

[Anonymous]

OP you still haven't answered what your job of great consequence is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP you still haven't answered what your job of great consequence is.

I didn’t live off a man

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you still haven't answered what your job of great consequence is.

I didn’t live off a man

Yet who seems happier in life? Not you, that's for sure.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you still haven't answered what your job of great consequence is.

I didn’t live off a man

Yet who seems happier in life? Not you, that's for sure.

I wouldn’t be happy being dependent on someone

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you still haven't answered what your job of great consequence is.

I didn’t live off a man

Yet who seems happier in life? Not you, that's for sure.

I wouldn’t be happy being dependent on someone

You aren't happy now and you do depend on your husband because you need his second income to fund your $5K vacation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you still haven't answered what your job of great consequence is.

I didn’t live off a man

Yet who seems happier in life? Not you, that's for sure.

I wouldn’t be happy being dependent on someone

You aren't happy now and you do depend on your husband because you need his second income to fund your $5K vacation.

Well we are a two-income team

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you still haven't answered what your job of great consequence is.

I didn’t live off a man

Yet who seems happier in life? Not you, that's for sure.

I wouldn’t be happy being dependent on someone

You aren't happy now and you do depend on your husband because you need his second income to fund your $5K vacation.

Well we are a two-income team

Yet still so miserable. MIL is living her best life on the other hand.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People want more things now. Bigger houses, eating out, house cleaners, more than one car, vacations, college for their kids, etc. I don’t know if things were actually cheaper but you are not comparing apples to apples.

Consumerism is an added an expense - technology, Nike sneakers, video games, fancy vacations — but other than that most people just want what generations used to easily have. Many families used to have housekeepers including both my parents when they were growing up. They were middle clsss/upper middle class living in a regular suburban neighborhood in fairly small homes. They went to college (cheap), took vacations to California, NYC and Florida. Medical care was inexpensive. Now all that crap is cost prohibitive.

So, OP, I hear ya! Just change the subject when she talks to something you both enjoy chatting about.

No one in my family went to college before my dad, my mom didn't go to college, for example. It wasn't common for everyone to go to college in previous generations. We live much more conspicuous lifestyles now than previous generations. By far. People traveled by car to go camping, kids wore hand me downs, expensive summer camps weren't the norm, limited technology. Our lives are much more complicated now and we pay dearly for it.

Eh, my life is not very different from my parents' at my age. I have a computer but that's basically it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you still haven't answered what your job of great consequence is.

I didn’t live off a man

Yet who seems happier in life? Not you, that's for sure.

I wouldn’t be happy being dependent on someone

You aren't happy now and you do depend on your husband because you need his second income to fund your $5K vacation.

Well we are a two-income team

Yet still so miserable. MIL is living her best life on the other hand.

I too wish I had lived at a less costly time that allowed me to live my best life in my 80s

[Anonymous]

I worked with someone like OP. What a waste of time comparing and being defensive all the time. Live and let live. When you are older you will realize what a waste of energy this is. Or you will be the miserable old relative no one wants to hear complain.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you still haven't answered what your job of great consequence is.

I didn’t live off a man

Yet who seems happier in life? Not you, that's for sure.

I wouldn’t be happy being dependent on someone

You aren't happy now and you do depend on your husband because you need his second income to fund your $5K vacation.

Well we are a two-income team

Hopefully MIL feels she and her husband were a team. They chose a different division of labor than you and DH (assuming MIL wasn't forced into being a SAHM due to social pressure). If you can't understand people make different choices than you, and you feel it is their problem you can't relate to them, I don't know what to tell you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you still haven't answered what your job of great consequence is.

I didn’t live off a man

Yet who seems happier in life? Not you, that's for sure.

I wouldn’t be happy being dependent on someone

If one of you works and the other is raising the kids (primarily), you’re both working. You currently pay someone else to raise your kids. That’s a real job. You might prefer to work outside the home (which is good, bc it sounds like you have to). But don’t demean people who stay home. Starting with your MIL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP you still haven't answered what your job of great consequence is.

I didn’t live off a man

Sounds fulfilling. Congratulations on your success.