Wife doesn’t care for looking good, dressing well

[Anonymous]

I remember taking a very high level job at a company where the CEO, soon to be terminated, only hired beautiful young women for support positions. My wife showed up one day with our young kids to see where Dad worked…dressed in mom gear….and she said that’s the last time she was going any where near our offices in mom gear. She really upped her game after that and she definitely had the underpinnings to make it happen. Many years later she still likes to look good.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I remember taking a very high level job at a company where the CEO, soon to be terminated, only hired beautiful young women for support positions. My wife showed up one day with our young kids to see where Dad worked…dressed in mom gear….and she said that’s the last time she was going any where near our offices in mom gear. She really upped her game after that and she definitely had the underpinnings to make it happen. Many years later she still likes to look good.

So the takeaway is: put your wife in embarrassing situations and shame her into looking nicer! Brilliant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want her to dress up, take her somewhere worth dressing up for.

As a SAHM, no way in hell am I dressing up every day, I need to be able to play at the park with my kids. Can’t do that in jeans. Plus my clothes get completely dirty by the end of the day. But if my H takes me somewhere nice, or better yet when we have a weekend away, I’ll dress up.

If she’s wearing the same outfit for days on end, then it’s probably depression and she needs help. But if you’re pissed she wears yoga pants when you want her to wear jeans, back off and maybe re-assess what you find valuable about your wife.

Sorry, don’t care how you or anyone else dresses, but the statement in bold is simply stupid.

Yes this is so dumb. I took my kid to the playground for two hours today. In jeans. I also put my hair up in a nice chignon and wore a nice but comfortable tank top. Was I ready for a fancy dinner out? No, but I did look presentable and wouldn’t have felt embarrassed if I ran into someone I knew. Oh and I also had a great time running around with my kid.

I wore the yoga pants I slept in and a t shirt and had my hair in a bun and I also had a blast. Didn’t feel embarrassed about seeing people.

To each their own. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want her to dress up, take her somewhere worth dressing up for.

As a SAHM, no way in hell am I dressing up every day, I need to be able to play at the park with my kids. Can’t do that in jeans. Plus my clothes get completely dirty by the end of the day. But if my H takes me somewhere nice, or better yet when we have a weekend away, I’ll dress up.

If she’s wearing the same outfit for days on end, then it’s probably depression and she needs help. But if you’re pissed she wears yoga pants when you want her to wear jeans, back off and maybe re-assess what you find valuable about your wife.

Sorry, don’t care how you or anyone else dresses, but the statement in bold is simply stupid.

Yes this is so dumb. I took my kid to the playground for two hours today. In jeans. I also put my hair up in a nice chignon and wore a nice but comfortable tank top. Was I ready for a fancy dinner out? No, but I did look presentable and wouldn’t have felt embarrassed if I ran into someone I knew. Oh and I also had a great time running around with my kid.

NP. A nice chignon for the park, naturally. I'm sure you did it just to keep your hair out of the way. So practical, right?



The fact you have any concern about potentially being embarrassed if you run into someone you know at the playground--wow. You must frequent one high-end playground if you're worried about the other mommies and daddies judging you for anything less than a chignon your nice tank top and of course your trusty, classy jeans. Maybe you're concerned you'd run into a parent who had influence at the PTA....

If a chignon is for the playground, do post us a photo of your hair when you actually go somewhere that matters, like the grocery store.

This is such peak DCUM. But you'll never see how ridiculous you and your chignon sound.

I have a little hair gadget that helps me put my hair into one in about a minute. It’s called the Carlin and I totally bought it based on a Facebook ad and it is legitimately the only thing I have found that lets me put up my long hair without using anything else. It’s such a time saver, I highly recommend it.

[Anonymous]

I'm going to give chignon poster the benefit of the doubt and assume she meant a generic bun. As someone with curly hair, the fastest way to get it looking fancy is to throw it up in a bun. I have multiple of ways of doing this, ranging from five seconds with a single hair tie to more elaborate with gel and a dozen hairpins. Guess which method I'm using for the park?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, you can thank the “athleisure” trend for this. People put on leggings or sweatpants and call it an “outfit.” And scream bloody murder when you tell them it isn’t.

Hehe you ever watched Star Trek? If so, you’ll know that athleisure wear is the attire of the future. Get with the program.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want her to dress up, take her somewhere worth dressing up for.

As a SAHM, no way in hell am I dressing up every day, I need to be able to play at the park with my kids. Can’t do that in jeans. Plus my clothes get completely dirty by the end of the day. But if my H takes me somewhere nice, or better yet when we have a weekend away, I’ll dress up.

If she’s wearing the same outfit for days on end, then it’s probably depression and she needs help. But if you’re pissed she wears yoga pants when you want her to wear jeans, back off and maybe re-assess what you find valuable about your wife.

Sorry, don’t care how you or anyone else dresses, but the statement in bold is simply stupid.

Denim is extremely inflexible, which is why you never see workout clothes made out of it.

I wear denim maybe 3-4x a year. It’s just way too uncomfortable and restrictive for me. I don’t wear anything I can’t do a full squat in.

But I was a gymnast and dancer, and I’m used to being able to use the full range of motion of my joints. Not being able to feels suffocating for me.

PP - I understand preferring other pants to jeans, don’t get me wrong. I also prefer to wear workout clothes to play with my kids. But to state that one “can’t“ do it in jeans is just ridiculous. People do extremely active WORK in jeans all the time. If you can’t squat in jeans it’s perhaps because your jeans are too tight or not a high enough rise. Again, I understand that jeans are not everyone’s cup of tea anymore, but people are acting like putting on a pair of jeans is the equivalent of a full length ballgown and heels.

I don’t understand how jeans are now considered dressing up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember taking a very high level job at a company where the CEO, soon to be terminated, only hired beautiful young women for support positions. My wife showed up one day with our young kids to see where Dad worked…dressed in mom gear….and she said that’s the last time she was going any where near our offices in mom gear. She really upped her game after that and she definitely had the underpinnings to make it happen. Many years later she still likes to look good.

So the takeaway is: put your wife in embarrassing situations and shame her into looking nicer! Brilliant.

Yea, that’s pretty messed up.

My takeaway would have been thank god I don’t have to work or put in all that effort into my appearance. Pretty sure landing the rich husband, getting to stay hone with the kids, and wear leggings everyday means I’m the one winning.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want her to dress up, take her somewhere worth dressing up for.

As a SAHM, no way in hell am I dressing up every day, I need to be able to play at the park with my kids. Can’t do that in jeans. Plus my clothes get completely dirty by the end of the day. But if my H takes me somewhere nice, or better yet when we have a weekend away, I’ll dress up.

If she’s wearing the same outfit for days on end, then it’s probably depression and she needs help. But if you’re pissed she wears yoga pants when you want her to wear jeans, back off and maybe re-assess what you find valuable about your wife.

Sorry, don’t care how you or anyone else dresses, but the statement in bold is simply stupid.

Denim is extremely inflexible, which is why you never see workout clothes made out of it.

I wear denim maybe 3-4x a year. It’s just way too uncomfortable and restrictive for me. I don’t wear anything I can’t do a full squat in.

But I was a gymnast and dancer, and I’m used to being able to use the full range of motion of my joints. Not being able to feels suffocating for me.

PP - I understand preferring other pants to jeans, don’t get me wrong. I also prefer to wear workout clothes to play with my kids. But to state that one “can’t“ do it in jeans is just ridiculous. People do extremely active WORK in jeans all the time. If you can’t squat in jeans it’s perhaps because your jeans are too tight or not a high enough rise. Again, I understand that jeans are not everyone’s cup of tea anymore, but people are acting like putting on a pair of jeans is the equivalent of a full length ballgown and heels.

I wear jeans all the time and I cannot squat in them, not really. They’re too tight for that and if I went looser they’d be unflattering. (DH once told me so and told me to go buy new jeans, so it’s not just in my head).

It really just depends on the jeans. And I have such a hard time finding jeans that fit and look good that I cannot make “good for playground” equipment another criteria.

[Anonymous]

Legit don’t understand women who are content to look dumpy. Even if your husband doesn’t care, isn’t the rest of your life more pleasant if other people generally find you attractive? And before any bitter frumps come accuse me of being a bimbo, I have a demanding and somewhat high-profile tech job. Which i would never show up to in sweatpants and a greasy ponytail.

[Anonymous]

I lost my spouse last year. I didn’t give one whip what they wore. Get your priorities straight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Legit don’t understand women who are content to look dumpy. Even if your husband doesn’t care, isn’t the rest of your life more pleasant if other people generally find you attractive? And before any bitter frumps come accuse me of being a bimbo, I have a demanding and somewhat high-profile tech job. Which i would never show up to in sweatpants and a greasy ponytail.

Actually, no, my quality of life is unrelated to how attractive people find me. Crazy, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you want her to dress up, take her somewhere worth dressing up for.

As a SAHM, no way in hell am I dressing up every day, I need to be able to play at the park with my kids. Can’t do that in jeans. Plus my clothes get completely dirty by the end of the day. But if my H takes me somewhere nice, or better yet when we have a weekend away, I’ll dress up.

If she’s wearing the same outfit for days on end, then it’s probably depression and she needs help. But if you’re pissed she wears yoga pants when you want her to wear jeans, back off and maybe re-assess what you find valuable about your wife.

Sorry, don’t care how you or anyone else dresses, but the statement in bold is simply stupid.

Yes this is so dumb. I took my kid to the playground for two hours today. In jeans. I also put my hair up in a nice chignon and wore a nice but comfortable tank top. Was I ready for a fancy dinner out? No, but I did look presentable and wouldn’t have felt embarrassed if I ran into someone I knew. Oh and I also had a great time running around with my kid.

It’s dumb to wear jeans in August…outside…to play.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I remember taking a very high level job at a company where the CEO, soon to be terminated, only hired beautiful young women for support positions. My wife showed up one day with our young kids to see where Dad worked…dressed in mom gear….and she said that’s the last time she was going any where near our offices in mom gear. She really upped her game after that and she definitely had the underpinnings to make it happen. Many years later she still likes to look good.

So the takeaway is: put your wife in embarrassing situations and shame her into looking nicer! Brilliant.

Yea, that’s pretty messed up.

My takeaway would have been thank god I don’t have to work or put in all that effort into my appearance. Pretty sure landing the rich husband, getting to stay hone with the kids, and wear leggings everyday means I’m the one winning.

NP: do you mean that she always came dressed up when she went out somewhere after that visit but at home was still casual? I interpret your above remark that wear leggings means that at home she still was casual?

BTW, not every woman would interpret staying at home/bagging a rich husband/wear leggings everyday is what they would consider winning. Other women might. not prefer that lifestyle (I know I wouldn't). This is not to diss you but just to point out that different women can have different priorities.

[Anonymous]

My husband thinks every woman looks better in tight yoga pants, so he has zero complaints about me in athleisure? I mean hell, celebrities basically live in lulu/beyond yoga/alo etc. what’s the issue?