Making my husband get a vasectomy

[Anonymous]

Just stick to back door entry and you’re guaranteed not to get pregnant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tubal ligation is done under general anesthesia! General anesthesia, laparoscopic surgery and even outpatient visits to a hospital come with risks of infection, strokes, neurological damage and exposing yourself to errors, plus I think it’s contraindicated if the patient has ever had a history of endometriosis.

Vasectomy is performed under local anesthesia, takes around 12 minutes and full recovery soreness at the surgical site are typically fully resolved within three days, sexual function can resume within 10 days in most cases.

When I had a vasectomy the doctor gave me a prescription for single Valium that I forgot to take, I drove myself to and from surgery and spent the rest of the day watching TV.
I was back at my very physically demanding job the following day. My recovery was complete and I was back in action within a week, the only sort of scary thing that happened was my first “issue“ was kinda bloody, that possibility was in the pamphlet but I didn’t bother reading that far down.

My wife had two natural child births and a C-section, two 1/4” incisions and a 12 minute surgery was the least I could do.

Your husband is being a lightweight and I’m sorry.

Nice to hear from a decent guy. I can’t do hormonal birth control for medical reasons and gave my husband the same choices. He was very happy to get a vasectomy and be done with condoms after our last kid. I had two c-sections and a 10lb baby so I was not interested in hearing any whining about a minor surgery but if he had wanted to continue using condoms I would have been ok with that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We won’t be getting divorced.

We need a permanent solution. I and two relatively easy pregnancies but do not want a. Third. I’m also 35 and considered high risk if we ever did have another baby.

We are pro-life ( for us) and don’t believe in abortion. This is why I want to make sure another child isn’t possible.

If you study the history of birth control within Christianity, you will becoming increasingly uneasy with birth control, too. No church body of any stripe--Catholic, Orthodox, or Protestant--accepted birth control until the Anglicans led the way in 1938 or so.

I was brought up that, essentially, everything except abortion is okay. But this flies in the face of the historical teaching of the church.

OP here. We are not religious. We just don’t think abortion is morally right for us.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Contrary to the popular claim, good vasectomies are not really reversible. If, God forbid, you should be hit by a bus tomorrow, would you really want to preclude your husband from having children with his second wife? I think not.

Cycle tracking works very well. It's the people who aren't doing it carefully who get surprises. You can have something like the Flo app on your phone. Pretty easy.

He's 53. He doesn't need anymore kids and my kids don't need their inheritance split.

That's not your decision to make. His body - his choice. You don't want to get pregnant get tubal. It's an easy procedure, can be done via laparoscopy

If a guy chose his hypothetical kids with his hypothetical wife over his actually present wife who has had two kids already, then he's a big tool.

Also this. But I think a lot of guys are just scared of the procedure. OP said she offered condoms as an alternative and I think that’s totally reasonable.

[Anonymous]

Why does he see the option to use condoms as an ultimatum? He sounds very entitled and I would be really frustrated with these conversations

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Tubal ligation is done under general anesthesia! General anesthesia, laparoscopic surgery and even outpatient visits to a hospital come with risks of infection, strokes, neurological damage and exposing yourself to errors, plus I think it’s contraindicated if the patient has ever had a history of endometriosis.

Vasectomy is performed under local anesthesia, takes around 12 minutes and full recovery soreness at the surgical site are typically fully resolved within three days, sexual function can resume within 10 days in most cases.

When I had a vasectomy the doctor gave me a prescription for single Valium that I forgot to take, I drove myself to and from surgery and spent the rest of the day watching TV.
I was back at my very physically demanding job the following day. My recovery was complete and I was back in action within a week, the only sort of scary thing that happened was my first “issue“ was kinda bloody, that possibility was in the pamphlet but I didn’t bother reading that far down.

My wife had two natural child births and a C-section, two 1/4” incisions and a 12 minute surgery was the least I could do.

Your husband is being a lightweight and I’m sorry.

You sound like an amazing partner! Thank you for showing what a real man does for his wife.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why does he see the option to use condoms as an ultimatum? He sounds very entitled and I would be really frustrated with these conversations

Agreed, he seems to think he's entitled to OPs body. Either by forcing her on BC, raw dogging or of course no sex at all. Condoms are a compromise that neither party has to get surgery (is V even considered surgery??) but he seems very childish to only want sex if it's without a condom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Contrary to the popular claim, good vasectomies are not really reversible. If, God forbid, you should be hit by a bus tomorrow, would you really want to preclude your husband from having children with his second wife? I think not.

Cycle tracking works very well. It's the people who aren't doing it carefully who get surprises. You can have something like the Flo app on your phone. Pretty easy.

You mean scientific claim .

[Anonymous]

Make a consultation appointment with a doctor for him.
Probably he has some questions and the doctor will clarify it for him.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. To me, it's not really an ultimatum where you are telling him what to do with his body. You are making decisions about your body (no IUD) and then making decisions about how to handle not getting pregnant again. Only one of those choices involves him doing something to his body. If he doesn't want a vasectomy, cool. But just like you can't force him, he can't force you to go on birth control. So the reasonable consequence/compromise is other methods to not get pregnant.

Yep. Condom, or abstaining. Maybe “rhythm” method, but the work is on OP again.

[Anonymous]

If you don't want to be pregnant again, go get your tube's tied. You can't tell him what to do. But, you can eaaily make that choice for yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tubal ligation is done under general anesthesia! General anesthesia, laparoscopic surgery and even outpatient visits to a hospital come with risks of infection, strokes, neurological damage and exposing yourself to errors, plus I think it’s contraindicated if the patient has ever had a history of endometriosis.

Vasectomy is performed under local anesthesia, takes around 12 minutes and full recovery soreness at the surgical site are typically fully resolved within three days, sexual function can resume within 10 days in most cases.

When I had a vasectomy the doctor gave me a prescription for single Valium that I forgot to take, I drove myself to and from surgery and spent the rest of the day watching TV.
I was back at my very physically demanding job the following day. My recovery was complete and I was back in action within a week, the only sort of scary thing that happened was my first “issue“ was kinda bloody, that possibility was in the pamphlet but I didn’t bother reading that far down.

My wife had two natural child births and a C-section, two 1/4” incisions and a 12 minute surgery was the least I could do.

Your husband is being a lightweight and I’m sorry.

You sound like an amazing partner! Thank you for showing what a real man does for his wife.

I had 5 general anesthesias and 3 laparoscopies treating endometriosis. Its easy procedures recovery takes 2 days.

I wouldn’t bother about my husband and just tie up my tubes and be done with it.

Men are Ps they are worried for their potency doing vasectomy.

[Anonymous]

Vasectomy is so easy. Guys who don’t get it are idiots. I give them major side eye because they are low-key indicating that they might want to have another kid. And likely not with you. They are keeping their options open.

-Man with a Vasectomy

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you don't want to be pregnant again, go get your tube's tied. You can't tell him what to do. But, you can eaaily make that choice for yourself.

Again she’s offered condoms and abstinence. Why do men discount every option that’s less than ideal for *them*

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just stick to back door entry and you’re guaranteed not to get pregnant.

Solid advice right there.