Very pretty, educated and successful 30-something women single or with unattractive and/or unsuccessful men?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I believe OP.

Mid-30s the top tier men are either married and fathers or soon-to-be fathers or dating younger.

The relatively good looking divorced dads of means are dating much younger women. 40-yr old neighbor, dad of two young boys, moved in when he and his (successful, pretty, same-age-as-him) wife separated. Within 6 months he had a 25 year-old girlfriend who clearly thought he hung the moon. The 25-yr old (who doesn't even seem to have a job) has since moved in. A 35-yr old would know this guy doesn't hang the moon, and he knows it. He isn't picking the young dummy because she's pretty, he's picking her because he knows that deep down he's a loser and older women would sniff it out quickly.

So there's that phenomenon going on. Divorced men dating 20-something women because they know the 30-something women wouldn't want them anyway (or they at least fear this).

How do you know he's a loser?

Because he’s dating a younger woman with no agency, duh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I believe OP.

Mid-30s the top tier men are either married and fathers or soon-to-be fathers or dating younger.

The relatively good looking divorced dads of means are dating much younger women. 40-yr old neighbor, dad of two young boys, moved in when he and his (successful, pretty, same-age-as-him) wife separated. Within 6 months he had a 25 year-old girlfriend who clearly thought he hung the moon. The 25-yr old (who doesn't even seem to have a job) has since moved in. A 35-yr old would know this guy doesn't hang the moon, and he knows it. He isn't picking the young dummy because she's pretty, he's picking her because he knows that deep down he's a loser and older women would sniff it out quickly.

So there's that phenomenon going on. Divorced men dating 20-something women because they know the 30-something women wouldn't want them anyway (or they at least fear this).

This is a very last tier 25 yo that moved in with a 40 yo dad of two. I dated 32-35 yo childless wealthy men when I was 25, and married one of those. Walked out with $5mm divorce settlement at 44 and now date the same 35 y.o. men with no kids, and for fun. I don't date men with young kids even in my own mid 40s. Life is good.

See? She gets the grift.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The girls are so pretty. So, so, so pretty.

They a very pretty. Totally.

And the personalities!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughters are in their thirties, and I've been happy to note that they & their peers are marrying bookish guys who would have been called geeks back in the day. They're avoiding the bro types and the conventionally attractive dudes. Beauty fades. These bookish guys aren't that successful...yet. They will be.

Maybe your daughters' friends are smart enough and mature enough to be attracted to something other than looks alone. In my 20s, I had a few boyfriends who were extremely attractive, but at that age I wasn't ready to get married.

As I got older, I was just naturally attracted more to personality, intelligence, etc., over conventional looks. I dated a lot and had my choice of many guys. The one I chose to be my DH was brilliant, fun, high earning, and great in bed, but most people would've thought his looks were more on the plain side (not ugly by any means, but not super hot like some of my old boyfriends). I was so much more attracted to him than my previous boyfriend who was also a high earner and fun, and much more conventionally attractive, but not so great in bed and just moderately smart (Ivy educated but not truly brilliant like my DH), and who I just couldn't bring myself to marry.

Women like me who are smart, educated, and attractive have choices, and we're free to make our own decisions rather than follow society's expectations or follow some checklist. If you had known my DH vs. the boyfriend I'd had before him, your superficial system would've thought the boyfriend was a much better catch. DH was the right choice for me. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and these girls may see something in these guys that you don't.

You are very full of yourself.

[Anonymous]

It has to be mainly women answering on this thread to think that a guy in his 40s with a 25 year old girlfriend is dating her because he fears that older women will see what a loser he is.

Ha!

He is dating a 25 year old to shag a 25 year old.

[Anonymous]

* It is statistically improbable that a majority of or all of “gathering” of women in their early to mid 30s were “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that your daughter’s friendship group consists of women where a majority of or all of them are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that any group of women where a majority holds two degrees that many of them are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that a group of women that are “stunning” will find women within the group that are long term single.

* without knowing the “successful” profession(s) in which these women find themselves in, it is unlikely (though possible) that these women are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that a group of women who are “stunning find themselves paired off with chumps.

I believe you that the men that they were paired with were less masculine. Especially given that from what you have told us, this group of women is very likely left-leaning politically. People aren’t dating across political lines any more and I suspect that the guys you would find to be more conventionally masculine are on the other side of the political aisle.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:* It is statistically improbable that a majority of or all of “gathering” of women in their early to mid 30s were “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that your daughter’s friendship group consists of women where a majority of or all of them are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that any group of women where a majority holds two degrees that many of them are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that a group of women that are “stunning” will find women within the group that are long term single.

* without knowing the “successful” profession(s) in which these women find themselves in, it is unlikely (though possible) that these women are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that a group of women who are “stunning find themselves paired off with chumps.

I believe you that the men that they were paired with were less masculine. Especially given that from what you have told us, this group of women is very likely left-leaning politically. People aren’t dating across political lines any more and I suspect that the guys you would find to be more conventionally masculine are on the other side of the political aisle.

Uh, oh, OP. Time to backtrack a bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:* It is statistically improbable that a majority of or all of “gathering” of women in their early to mid 30s were “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that your daughter’s friendship group consists of women where a majority of or all of them are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that any group of women where a majority holds two degrees that many of them are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that a group of women that are “stunning” will find women within the group that are long term single.

* without knowing the “successful” profession(s) in which these women find themselves in, it is unlikely (though possible) that these women are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that a group of women who are “stunning find themselves paired off with chumps.

I believe you that the men that they were paired with were less masculine. Especially given that from what you have told us, this group of women is very likely left-leaning politically. People aren’t dating across political lines any more and I suspect that the guys you would find to be more conventionally masculine are on the other side of the political aisle.

Certainly improbable for median American women, but not improbable for:

Upper middle class to wealthy upbringings, high school student-athletes, selective sorority sisters, college educated, advanced degrees, spin yoga pilates runners, reside in a healthy city, good jobs, healthy eaters, low or no cigarette drug and alcohol use.

[Anonymous]

Maybe the homely duds are legends in the sack and all your DD’s friends are using them for sex

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:* It is statistically improbable that a majority of or all of “gathering” of women in their early to mid 30s were “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that your daughter’s friendship group consists of women where a majority of or all of them are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that any group of women where a majority holds two degrees that many of them are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that a group of women that are “stunning” will find women within the group that are long term single.

* without knowing the “successful” profession(s) in which these women find themselves in, it is unlikely (though possible) that these women are “stunning”.

* It is statistically improbable that a group of women who are “stunning find themselves paired off with chumps.

I believe you that the men that they were paired with were less masculine. Especially given that from what you have told us, this group of women is very likely left-leaning politically. People aren’t dating across political lines any more and I suspect that the guys you would find to be more conventionally masculine are on the other side of the political aisle.

Certainly improbable for median American women, but not improbable for:

Upper middle class to wealthy upbringings, high school student-athletes, selective sorority sisters, college educated, advanced degrees, spin yoga pilates runners, reside in a healthy city, good jobs, healthy eaters, low or no cigarette drug and alcohol use.

Np. Even among these cohorts, by age 30-35, the women in this area look old. Aging is normal and shouldn't affect how others perceive their beauty, but we all know it does, and women are even more so affected by this bias.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I believe OP.

Mid-30s the top tier men are either married and fathers or soon-to-be fathers or dating younger.

The relatively good looking divorced dads of means are dating much younger women. 40-yr old neighbor, dad of two young boys, moved in when he and his (successful, pretty, same-age-as-him) wife separated. Within 6 months he had a 25 year-old girlfriend who clearly thought he hung the moon. The 25-yr old (who doesn't even seem to have a job) has since moved in. A 35-yr old would know this guy doesn't hang the moon, and he knows it. He isn't picking the young dummy because she's pretty, he's picking her because he knows that deep down he's a loser and older women would sniff it out quickly.

So there's that phenomenon going on. Divorced men dating 20-something women because they know the 30-something women wouldn't want them anyway (or they at least fear this).

You could be right, but as a mid-40s divorced dad, when I was first single I dated women in their 30s until three times in a row they wanted kids right away. That's when I updated my online dating settings to include 20s. Has nothing to do with thinking I hung the moon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I believe OP.

Mid-30s the top tier men are either married and fathers or soon-to-be fathers or dating younger.

The relatively good looking divorced dads of means are dating much younger women. 40-yr old neighbor, dad of two young boys, moved in when he and his (successful, pretty, same-age-as-him) wife separated. Within 6 months he had a 25 year-old girlfriend who clearly thought he hung the moon. The 25-yr old (who doesn't even seem to have a job) has since moved in. A 35-yr old would know this guy doesn't hang the moon, and he knows it. He isn't picking the young dummy because she's pretty, he's picking her because he knows that deep down he's a loser and older women would sniff it out quickly.

So there's that phenomenon going on. Divorced men dating 20-something women because they know the 30-something women wouldn't want them anyway (or they at least fear this).

You could be right, but as a mid-40s divorced dad, when I was first single I dated women in their 30s until three times in a row they wanted kids right away. That's when I updated my online dating settings to include 20s. Has nothing to do with thinking I hung the moon.

So you could use a woman longer? This makes no sense. Society going downhill right from this post. All about what I can get out from a person short term.

[Anonymous]

I’ve seen this in Europe.
My theory: women who are successful think highly of themselves whereas they don’t have a nice personality, they are demanding so the guys just go with younger/more agreeable even if less loaded. Money and success in a partner is not as important when you yourself are all that (I am talking about men).
Also yes they waited too long.
I am a woman fwiw

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’ve seen this in Europe.
My theory: women who are successful think highly of themselves whereas they don’t have a nice personality, they are demanding so the guys just go with younger/more agreeable even if less loaded. Money and success in a partner is not as important when you yourself are all that (I am talking about men).
Also yes they waited too long.
I am a woman fwiw

But they aren't all that. They are homely men who don't make much money.

[Anonymous]

8:27 again. I'm referring to the men OP is mentioning. They are not making much money or terribly bright or interesting or good looking.

I guess you are saying the good-looking high achieving men are dating women much younger than them and the higher standard women are dating the homely men because the good-looking high-status men don't want them.

In my area there are many high achieving couples where both people work and do a lot with the community.

I know of one man who divorced a decent but not outrageously beautiful woman and married a beautiful woman half his age which came across as him trading up. However, the new kids are cute but have mental defects. The kids of the first wife are grown and successful.