Very pretty, educated and successful 30-something women single or with unattractive and/or unsuccessful men?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I believe OP.

Mid-30s the top tier men are either married and fathers or soon-to-be fathers or dating younger.

The relatively good looking divorced dads of means are dating much younger women. 40-yr old neighbor, dad of two young boys, moved in when he and his (successful, pretty, same-age-as-him) wife separated. Within 6 months he had a 25 year-old girlfriend who clearly thought he hung the moon. The 25-yr old (who doesn't even seem to have a job) has since moved in. A 35-yr old would know this guy doesn't hang the moon, and he knows it. He isn't picking the young dummy because she's pretty, he's picking her because he knows that deep down he's a loser and older women would sniff it out quickly.

So there's that phenomenon going on. Divorced men dating 20-something women because they know the 30-something women wouldn't want them anyway (or they at least fear this).

Yeah, the guy couldn’t be dating a 25-year-old because she’s hotter, more youthful and more fertile (qualities that men have valued since time immemorial). It must be that he is intimidated by the 35-year-old.

Middle-age woman cope is really a sight to behold!

I think it boils down to the early and mid 30s “girl boss” women — even if they are still very attractive — just tend to have a lot of baggage and hangups. Not their fault. How can you not have a lot of baggage and trauma if you’ve been unsuccessfully dating men for 15 to 20 years. Plus decades of birth control screwing up your hormones, maybe an abortion, and all the stress that comes with a career, which requires you to be a bit pushy and elbowy.

What a misogynist!

Oh and birth control didn't screw up my hormones and also made it so I never needed an abortion.

If a woman in her 30s and both single and childless, after four years of undergrad, X years of advanced degrees, a career in a major city, and various boyfriends and hookups through the years, it is very likely she’s been on birth control off and on for upwards of 20 years and possibly has had an abortion. BC is not 100% and women go off it from time to time, especially when single.

Whether you want to admit to it or not, this is all BAGGAGE.

Ok now I know you are nuts. No, most women on bc have not had an abortion, and most women have not had an abortion. And whether or not she has had one or been on birth control is not baggage in the least. It’s basic human hygiene. This is like saying that thirty years of brushing your teeth is baggage. Ludicrous.

We are not talking about “most women,” the cohort the thread is about are successful 30-something girl bosses. The thread has digressed into single 30-something women who are unmarried and childless. If you get to such an advanced age without a marriage or baby, safe bet some history of BC, Plan B, and/or an abortion. They are not “hygiene” and they do impact your body and mind.

BS. You have no idea what you were talking about.

You apparently don’t know realize how the pill and Plan B works? And you think women who get abortions just forget about it afterwards? It’s permanent trauma. Failed relationships and hookups for 15 or 20 years are also a lot of trauma. It all takes a toll on you. This baggage impacts your hormones, your appearance, your disposition and personality and it all repels men. You can be in denial if you want to. It’s the truth. Marry young if you want to avoid this.

Be warned ladies, the scarlet letter is upon you because of birth control and hook ups. No maiden’s tale hat necessary, not for these gents! Bwahahahahahahha!

Do you really think:

- 15 years of failed relationships
- 15 years on the pill
- sporadic use of Plan B
- an abortion
- stressful career
- student loan debt
- fertility clock ticking

Have no impact on you as a person? Really? Do you think every 33 year old bachelorette is a clean slate? You are in denial if you don’t acknowledge this all creates baggage. This is why the successful men are likely put off by women their age and instead go for women in their mid and late 20s. Less baggage, less hangups, not as pushy and high maintenance.

Hi again-

No the pill doesn’t create baggage any more than a guy jerking off and losing his sperm creates baggage. Do men cry because of “lost sperm” when they are in the shower? I didn’t know.

Plan B doesn’t create baggage any more than using a condom does because they both block conception.

Abortion can go either way. Some women probably feel bad, but you don’t get to be the judge of how women feel about a very personal decision. For many women, it is the best choice for them at the time. If my Mom hadn’t had one, I wouldn’t exist.

A stressful career/student loan debt can create baggage on men and women equally in fact men are more likely to become rude to others when they experience stress.

I guess if guys want to become first time dads at 40+, they can, but it does get harder to bend down to pick up kids and toys as you get older!

You are free to choose whatever age they want, but the idea that these are reasons to be “put off women” belongs to you. Life gets to everyone and thinking that only those “clear of baggage” are worthy of love is a sure way to hate yourself as you get older.

Great post. Thank you for these words

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I believe OP.

Mid-30s the top tier men are either married and fathers or soon-to-be fathers or dating younger.

The relatively good looking divorced dads of means are dating much younger women. 40-yr old neighbor, dad of two young boys, moved in when he and his (successful, pretty, same-age-as-him) wife separated. Within 6 months he had a 25 year-old girlfriend who clearly thought he hung the moon. The 25-yr old (who doesn't even seem to have a job) has since moved in. A 35-yr old would know this guy doesn't hang the moon, and he knows it. He isn't picking the young dummy because she's pretty, he's picking her because he knows that deep down he's a loser and older women would sniff it out quickly.

So there's that phenomenon going on. Divorced men dating 20-something women because they know the 30-something women wouldn't want them anyway (or they at least fear this).

Yeah, the guy couldn’t be dating a 25-year-old because she’s hotter, more youthful and more fertile (qualities that men have valued since time immemorial). It must be that he is intimidated by the 35-year-old.

Middle-age woman cope is really a sight to behold!

I think it boils down to the early and mid 30s “girl boss” women — even if they are still very attractive — just tend to have a lot of baggage and hangups. Not their fault. How can you not have a lot of baggage and trauma if you’ve been unsuccessfully dating men for 15 to 20 years. Plus decades of birth control screwing up your hormones, maybe an abortion, and all the stress that comes with a career, which requires you to be a bit pushy and elbowy.

What a misogynist!

Oh and birth control didn't screw up my hormones and also made it so I never needed an abortion.

If a woman in her 30s and both single and childless, after four years of undergrad, X years of advanced degrees, a career in a major city, and various boyfriends and hookups through the years, it is very likely she’s been on birth control off and on for upwards of 20 years and possibly has had an abortion. BC is not 100% and women go off it from time to time, especially when single.

Whether you want to admit to it or not, this is all BAGGAGE.

Ok now I know you are nuts. No, most women on bc have not had an abortion, and most women have not had an abortion. And whether or not she has had one or been on birth control is not baggage in the least. It’s basic human hygiene. This is like saying that thirty years of brushing your teeth is baggage. Ludicrous.

We are not talking about “most women,” the cohort the thread is about are successful 30-something girl bosses. The thread has digressed into single 30-something women who are unmarried and childless. If you get to such an advanced age without a marriage or baby, safe bet some history of BC, Plan B, and/or an abortion. They are not “hygiene” and they do impact your body and mind.

BS. You have no idea what you were talking about.

You apparently don’t know realize how the pill and Plan B works? And you think women who get abortions just forget about it afterwards? It’s permanent trauma. Failed relationships and hookups for 15 or 20 years are also a lot of trauma. It all takes a toll on you. This baggage impacts your hormones, your appearance, your disposition and personality and it all repels men. You can be in denial if you want to. It’s the truth. Marry young if you want to avoid this.

Be warned ladies, the scarlet letter is upon you because of birth control and hook ups. No maiden’s tale hat necessary, not for these gents! Bwahahahahahahha!

Do you really think:

- 15 years of failed relationships
- 15 years on the pill
- sporadic use of Plan B
- an abortion
- stressful career
- student loan debt
- fertility clock ticking

Have no impact on you as a person? Really? Do you think every 33 year old bachelorette is a clean slate? You are in denial if you don’t acknowledge this all creates baggage. This is why the successful men are likely put off by women their age and instead go for women in their mid and late 20s. Less baggage, less hangups, not as pushy and high maintenance.

So by “clean slate” you mean uneducated virgin with no earning potential?

There is no such thing as a clean slate. There are varying degrees of baggage and the drama, personality and mental issues wedded to it. When you’re childless and never married at 30+, you have more issues than an average single woman five to ten years young than you, obviously.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I believe OP.

Mid-30s the top tier men are either married and fathers or soon-to-be fathers or dating younger.

The relatively good looking divorced dads of means are dating much younger women. 40-yr old neighbor, dad of two young boys, moved in when he and his (successful, pretty, same-age-as-him) wife separated. Within 6 months he had a 25 year-old girlfriend who clearly thought he hung the moon. The 25-yr old (who doesn't even seem to have a job) has since moved in. A 35-yr old would know this guy doesn't hang the moon, and he knows it. He isn't picking the young dummy because she's pretty, he's picking her because he knows that deep down he's a loser and older women would sniff it out quickly.

So there's that phenomenon going on. Divorced men dating 20-something women because they know the 30-something women wouldn't want them anyway (or they at least fear this).

Yeah, the guy couldn’t be dating a 25-year-old because she’s hotter, more youthful and more fertile (qualities that men have valued since time immemorial). It must be that he is intimidated by the 35-year-old.

Middle-age woman cope is really a sight to behold!

I think it boils down to the early and mid 30s “girl boss” women — even if they are still very attractive — just tend to have a lot of baggage and hangups. Not their fault. How can you not have a lot of baggage and trauma if you’ve been unsuccessfully dating men for 15 to 20 years. Plus decades of birth control screwing up your hormones, maybe an abortion, and all the stress that comes with a career, which requires you to be a bit pushy and elbowy.

What a misogynist!

Oh and birth control didn't screw up my hormones and also made it so I never needed an abortion.

If a woman in her 30s and both single and childless, after four years of undergrad, X years of advanced degrees, a career in a major city, and various boyfriends and hookups through the years, it is very likely she’s been on birth control off and on for upwards of 20 years and possibly has had an abortion. BC is not 100% and women go off it from time to time, especially when single.

Whether you want to admit to it or not, this is all BAGGAGE.

Ok now I know you are nuts. No, most women on bc have not had an abortion, and most women have not had an abortion. And whether or not she has had one or been on birth control is not baggage in the least. It’s basic human hygiene. This is like saying that thirty years of brushing your teeth is baggage. Ludicrous.

We are not talking about “most women,” the cohort the thread is about are successful 30-something girl bosses. The thread has digressed into single 30-something women who are unmarried and childless. If you get to such an advanced age without a marriage or baby, safe bet some history of BC, Plan B, and/or an abortion. They are not “hygiene” and they do impact your body and mind.

BS. You have no idea what you were talking about.

You apparently don’t know realize how the pill and Plan B works? And you think women who get abortions just forget about it afterwards? It’s permanent trauma. Failed relationships and hookups for 15 or 20 years are also a lot of trauma. It all takes a toll on you. This baggage impacts your hormones, your appearance, your disposition and personality and it all repels men. You can be in denial if you want to. It’s the truth. Marry young if you want to avoid this.

Be warned ladies, the scarlet letter is upon you because of birth control and hook ups. No maiden’s tale hat necessary, not for these gents! Bwahahahahahahha!

Do you really think:

- 15 years of failed relationships
- 15 years on the pill
- sporadic use of Plan B
- an abortion
- stressful career
- student loan debt
- fertility clock ticking

Have no impact on you as a person? Really? Do you think every 33 year old bachelorette is a clean slate? You are in denial if you don’t acknowledge this all creates baggage. This is why the successful men are likely put off by women their age and instead go for women in their mid and late 20s. Less baggage, less hangups, not as pushy and high maintenance.

So by “clean slate” you mean uneducated virgin with no earning potential?

There is no such thing as a clean slate. There are varying degrees of baggage and the drama, personality and mental issues wedded to it. When you’re childless and never married at 30+, you have more issues than an average single woman five to ten years young than you, obviously.

…and a much narrower fertility window.

[Anonymous]

Well, most men over 30 marry after 30 too.

[Anonymous]

Plenty of damaged men I know getting cute attractive employed gfs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hope Hicks is nearly 35. Still childless and unmarried. It is an epidemic. There are so few good men out there.

She has a “hard” face

There is nothing attractive about her

It’s why she was dating a 50+ year old

Result of breaking marriages.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Hope Hicks is nearly 35. Still childless and unmarried. It is an epidemic. There are so few good men out there.

She has a “hard” face

There is nothing attractive about her

It’s why she was dating a 50+ year old

Lol, you wish you were a tenth as hot as Hope Hicks. You're letting your political bias sway you - she is a 9.5, especially in DC.

That's the thing. They ARE her job. It's her "business." A DC natural.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter hosted a gathering this weekend. She and her friends are all 30 to 35 years old. This may sound terrible but I couldn’t help but notice how many of her stunning lifelong friends were either long-term single or their male companions (husbands, fiancés, and live-in boyfriends) were optics mismatches and also, many of them didn’t seem to have a lot going on professionally. I’m not just saying this because I’ve known them for so long. My daughter’s friends are very attractive, very sporty lifestyles, most have two degrees, and they are successful professionally. I’m sorry for noticing, but most of the men they were with just were not handsome at all. Even my husband noticed and he never makes comments like that.

Is this reflective of how challenging it is out there for women my daughter’s age?

What your DD is doing, who she is with and why you were you there at the gathering?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My daughter hosted a gathering this weekend. She and her friends are all 30 to 35 years old. This may sound terrible but I couldn’t help but notice how many of her stunning lifelong friends were either long-term single or their male companions (husbands, fiancés, and live-in boyfriends) were optics mismatches and also, many of them didn’t seem to have a lot going on professionally. I’m not just saying this because I’ve known them for so long. My daughter’s friends are very attractive, very sporty lifestyles, most have two degrees, and they are successful professionally. I’m sorry for noticing, but most of the men they were with just were not handsome at all. Even my husband noticed and he never makes comments like that.

Is this reflective of how challenging it is out there for women my daughter’s age?

How do you know that this isn't what they wanted and chose?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well, most men over 30 marry after 30 too.

Fertility windows differ with gender.

[Anonymous]

What’s ti wonder.
We’ve “women’s libbed” the men right out of the need to commit.
Biologically, in nearly all creatures, males are wired to spread their seed.
When society’s conventions dictated that men should choose a monogamous partner, it may have gone against sexual instinct for males, but they did it because remaining single would have left them unable to do the deed.

But since women decided to free themselves from the stigma that said sex outside of marriage was taboo, men who are highly sought after no longer see the point of partnering up for the longterm with just one female.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My daughter hosted a gathering this weekend. She and her friends are all 30 to 35 years old. This may sound terrible but I couldn’t help but notice how many of her stunning lifelong friends were either long-term single or their male companions (husbands, fiancés, and live-in boyfriends) were optics mismatches and also, many of them didn’t seem to have a lot going on professionally. I’m not just saying this because I’ve known them for so long. My daughter’s friends are very attractive, very sporty lifestyles, most have two degrees, and they are successful professionally. I’m sorry for noticing, but most of the men they were with just were not handsome at all. Even my husband noticed and he never makes comments like that.

Is this reflective of how challenging it is out there for women my daughter’s age?

What your DD is doing, who she is with and why you were you there at the gathering?

NP but photos exist

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I believe OP.

Mid-30s the top tier men are either married and fathers or soon-to-be fathers or dating younger.

The relatively good looking divorced dads of means are dating much younger women. 40-yr old neighbor, dad of two young boys, moved in when he and his (successful, pretty, same-age-as-him) wife separated. Within 6 months he had a 25 year-old girlfriend who clearly thought he hung the moon. The 25-yr old (who doesn't even seem to have a job) has since moved in. A 35-yr old would know this guy doesn't hang the moon, and he knows it. He isn't picking the young dummy because she's pretty, he's picking her because he knows that deep down he's a loser and older women would sniff it out quickly.

So there's that phenomenon going on. Divorced men dating 20-something women because they know the 30-something women wouldn't want them anyway (or they at least fear this).

Yeah, the guy couldn’t be dating a 25-year-old because she’s hotter, more youthful and more fertile (qualities that men have valued since time immemorial). It must be that he is intimidated by the 35-year-old. :roll:

Middle-age woman cope is really a sight to behold!

I think it boils down to the early and mid 30s “girl boss” women — even if they are still very attractive — just tend to have a lot of baggage and hangups. Not their fault. How can you not have a lot of baggage and trauma if you’ve been unsuccessfully dating men for 15 to 20 years. Plus decades of birth control screwing up your hormones, maybe an abortion, and all the stress that comes with a career, which requires you to be a bit pushy and elbowy.

What a misogynist!

Oh and birth control didn't screw up my hormones and also made it so I never needed an abortion.

If a woman in her 30s and both single and childless, after four years of undergrad, X years of advanced degrees, a career in a major city, and various boyfriends and hookups through the years, it is very likely she’s been on birth control off and on for upwards of 20 years and possibly has had an abortion. BC is not 100% and women go off it from time to time, especially when single.

Whether you want to admit to it or not, this is all BAGGAGE.

Ok now I know you are nuts. No, most women on bc have not had an abortion, and most women have not had an abortion. And whether or not she has had one or been on birth control is not baggage in the least. It’s basic human hygiene. This is like saying that thirty years of brushing your teeth is baggage. Ludicrous.

We are not talking about “most women,” the cohort the thread is about are successful 30-something girl bosses. The thread has digressed into single 30-something women who are unmarried and childless. If you get to such an advanced age without a marriage or baby, safe bet some history of BC, Plan B, and/or an abortion. They are not “hygiene” and they do impact your body and mind.

BS. You have no idea what you were talking about.

You apparently don’t know realize how the pill and Plan B works? And you think women who get abortions just forget about it afterwards? It’s permanent trauma. Failed relationships and hookups for 15 or 20 years are also a lot of trauma. It all takes a toll on you. This baggage impacts your hormones, your appearance, your disposition and personality and it all repels men. You can be in denial if you want to. It’s the truth. Marry young if you want to avoid this.

Be warned ladies, the scarlet letter is upon you because of birth control and hook ups. No maiden’s tale hat necessary, not for these gents! Bwahahahahahahha!

Do you really think:

- 15 years of failed relationships
- 15 years on the pill
- sporadic use of Plan B
- an abortion
- stressful career
- student loan debt
- fertility clock ticking

Have no impact on you as a person? Really? Do you think every 33 year old bachelorette is a clean slate? You are in denial if you don’t acknowledge this all creates baggage. This is why the successful men are likely put off by women their age and instead go for women in their mid and late 20s. Less baggage, less hangups, not as pushy and high maintenance.

Hi again-

No the pill doesn’t create baggage any more than a guy jerking off and losing his sperm creates baggage. Do men cry because of “lost sperm” when they are in the shower? I didn’t know.

Plan B doesn’t create baggage any more than using a condom does because they both block conception.

Abortion can go either way. Some women probably feel bad, but you don’t get to be the judge of how women feel about a very personal decision. For many women, it is the best choice for them at the time. If my Mom hadn’t had one, I wouldn’t exist.

A stressful career/student loan debt can create baggage on men and women equally in fact men are more likely to become rude to others when they experience stress.

I guess if guys want to become first time dads at 40+, they can, but it does get harder to bend down to pick up kids and toys as you get older!

You are free to choose whatever age they want, but the idea that these are reasons to be “put off women” belongs to you. Life gets to everyone and thinking that only those “clear of baggage” are worthy of love is a sure way to hate yourself as you get older.

Great post. Thank you for these words

Wow—-now that’s what I call some warped sibling rivalry. Wonder what your aborted sibling would have had to say about his/her being sacrificed for your survival. Bizarre framing on your part PP

[Anonymous]

It's unlikely that these are all low quality men. Male fashion sense in this area is awful and many married men wind up making no effort in this area. It's far more likely that these guys are just relatively well off computer engineers of some sort that just stop by the clothing section on their way through Costco to keep their wardrobe up to date.

[Anonymous]

Many of these women have strong personalities and difficult to be around. I am one of those women but I met my Dh when we were 24 years old and I was still developing my adult personality. I’m pretty sure if I was single at 35, I would be a pain in the ass.

My friends in their forties have difficult personalities and very demanding. They, including me, would be difficult to date and if I were a guy, I would pass.