Upstairs is off-limits to guests

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's some really strange black-and-white thinking on this thread.

Not feeling defensively private about "upstairs" =/= being fine with guests "wandering," "roaming," and "snooping."

Exactly. There's a difference between entering because you need to find someone and searching through the medicine cabinet. But this has been pointed out 100 times, and the poster doesn't get it.

If I have gone into my master bathroom you Do Not need to enter my bedroom to "find" me. If I've gone into my bedroom you KNOCK. I will either say "Come in or Just a moment" you don't just barge into my bedroom looking for me.

Do you follow your guests to the powder room and wait outside talking to them through the door while they use it? Come on.

So this. I have never needed to "find" my host. If I don't see them, I wait a few minutes. It's not that hard to understand. I'm a self-sufficient adult, I am not a needy clinger when I go to someone else's home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's some really strange black-and-white thinking on this thread.

Not feeling defensively private about "upstairs" =/= being fine with guests "wandering," "roaming," and "snooping."

Exactly. There's a difference between entering because you need to find someone and searching through the medicine cabinet. But this has been pointed out 100 times, and the poster doesn't get it.

If I have gone into my master bathroom you Do Not need to enter my bedroom to "find" me. If I've gone into my bedroom you KNOCK. I will either say "Come in or Just a moment" you don't just barge into my bedroom looking for me.

Do you follow your guests to the powder room and wait outside talking to them through the door while they use it? Come on.

Who says people aren't going to knock? But that's different from banning people from your upper floor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's some really strange black-and-white thinking on this thread.

Not feeling defensively private about "upstairs" =/= being fine with guests "wandering," "roaming," and "snooping."

Exactly. There's a difference between entering because you need to find someone and searching through the medicine cabinet. But this has been pointed out 100 times, and the poster doesn't get it.

If I have gone into my master bathroom you Do Not need to enter my bedroom to "find" me. If I've gone into my bedroom you KNOCK. I will either say "Come in or Just a moment" you don't just barge into my bedroom looking for me.

Do you follow your guests to the powder room and wait outside talking to them through the door while they use it? Come on.

Just lock your door so you can do your private thing. I fear for children who have playdates in your home. They must be getting constant lectures from you about the rules of the home.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord. Is this thread still going on? All the people who are neurotic about their personal space just need to lock their doors. Problem solved.

Or they can just throw up their hands and meet these nosy nellies in a public spot. That's probably the easiest thing. Just keep an eye on your purse unless you want someone going into it looking for a tissue...

That would probably be a better idea for people who are so antsy about keeping their home as a private sanctuary. But they would probably be worried about encountering the unwashed masses outside their home.

As long as you're throwing manners out the door anyway...might as well meet em on their turf, KWIM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Good lord. Is this thread still going on? All the people who are neurotic about their personal space just need to lock their doors. Problem solved.

There really are a few very mentally ill posters on this thread. The paranoia about “snooping” is insane.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord. Is this thread still going on? All the people who are neurotic about their personal space just need to lock their doors. Problem solved.

There really are a few very mentally ill posters on this thread. The paranoia about “snooping” is insane.

Going into someone else's private living quarters is intrusive. You are trying to put the hosts on the defensive for not appreciating it when a guest intrudes into their private space. But you are the one who is doing the intruding and, yes, you are being very rude.

It doesn't matter that you DGAF who wanders into your bedroom, other people consider that to be extremely impolite and disrespectful of you.

Do not assume that a dinner invitation gives you free access to your host's home because 9 times out of 10 it absolutely does not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's some really strange black-and-white thinking on this thread.

Not feeling defensively private about "upstairs" =/= being fine with guests "wandering," "roaming," and "snooping."

Exactly. There's a difference between entering because you need to find someone and searching through the medicine cabinet. But this has been pointed out 100 times, and the poster doesn't get it.

If I have gone into my master bathroom you Do Not need to enter my bedroom to "find" me. If I've gone into my bedroom you KNOCK. I will either say "Come in or Just a moment" you don't just barge into my bedroom looking for me.

Do you follow your guests to the powder room and wait outside talking to them through the door while they use it? Come on.

Just lock your door so you can do your private thing. I fear for children who have playdates in your home. They must be getting constant lectures from you about the rules of the home.

NP. Children are great in my home. They play in my kids' bedrooms (they are invited), in the basement/living room/back yard, porch, etc. They ask politely for a snack, etc.

I've never once caught kids "checking out the layout" of my master suite, or having relations secretly in my house (was it this thread or the "Is it rude to snoop" thread where people straight up admitted to doing that)?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord. Is this thread still going on? All the people who are neurotic about their personal space just need to lock their doors. Problem solved.

There really are a few very mentally ill posters on this thread. The paranoia about “snooping” is insane.

Going into someone else's private living quarters is intrusive. You are trying to put the hosts on the defensive for not appreciating it when a guest intrudes into their private space. But you are the one who is doing the intruding and, yes, you are being very rude.

It doesn't matter that you DGAF who wanders into your bedroom, other people consider that to be extremely impolite and disrespectful of you.

Do not assume that a dinner invitation gives you free access to your host's home because 9 times out of 10 it absolutely does not.

It is intrusive to you. Your feelings are not universal. A lot of other people don't care because they have other things that they choose to worry about.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's some really strange black-and-white thinking on this thread.

Not feeling defensively private about "upstairs" =/= being fine with guests "wandering," "roaming," and "snooping."

Exactly. There's a difference between entering because you need to find someone and searching through the medicine cabinet. But this has been pointed out 100 times, and the poster doesn't get it.

If I have gone into my master bathroom you Do Not need to enter my bedroom to "find" me. If I've gone into my bedroom you KNOCK. I will either say "Come in or Just a moment" you don't just barge into my bedroom looking for me.

Do you follow your guests to the powder room and wait outside talking to them through the door while they use it? Come on.

Just lock your door so you can do your private thing. I fear for children who have playdates in your home. They must be getting constant lectures from you about the rules of the home.

NP. Children are great in my home. They play in my kids' bedrooms (they are invited), in the basement/living room/back yard, porch, etc. They ask politely for a snack, etc.

I've never once caught kids "checking out the layout" of my master suite, or having relations secretly in my house (was it this thread or the "Is it rude to snoop" thread where people straight up admitted to doing that)?

+1000

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord. Is this thread still going on? All the people who are neurotic about their personal space just need to lock their doors. Problem solved.

There really are a few very mentally ill posters on this thread. The paranoia about “snooping” is insane.

Going into someone else's private living quarters is intrusive. You are trying to put the hosts on the defensive for not appreciating it when a guest intrudes into their private space. But you are the one who is doing the intruding and, yes, you are being very rude.

It doesn't matter that you DGAF who wanders into your bedroom, other people consider that to be extremely impolite and disrespectful of you.

Do not assume that a dinner invitation gives you free access to your host's home because 9 times out of 10 it absolutely does not.

It is intrusive to you. Your feelings are not universal. A lot of other people don't care because they have other things that they choose to worry about.

Ummm...when it comes to my own personal space, my feelings are ALL that matter. If I don't want you wandering freely into my bedroom you stay the h*ll out. Period.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord. Is this thread still going on? All the people who are neurotic about their personal space just need to lock their doors. Problem solved.

There really are a few very mentally ill posters on this thread. The paranoia about “snooping” is insane.

Name a good reason for being in a host's personal space that requires being there without an invitation or quick permission that doesn't involve some type of sudden illness or truly extraordinary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord. Is this thread still going on? All the people who are neurotic about their personal space just need to lock their doors. Problem solved.

There really are a few very mentally ill posters on this thread. The paranoia about “snooping” is insane.

Going into someone else's private living quarters is intrusive. You are trying to put the hosts on the defensive for not appreciating it when a guest intrudes into their private space. But you are the one who is doing the intruding and, yes, you are being very rude.

It doesn't matter that you DGAF who wanders into your bedroom, other people consider that to be extremely impolite and disrespectful of you.

Do not assume that a dinner invitation gives you free access to your host's home because 9 times out of 10 it absolutely does not.

It is intrusive to you. Your feelings are not universal. A lot of other people don't care because they have other things that they choose to worry about.

No one's feelings are universal. Which is why polite, well-mannered people *never assume and always err on the side of respecting privacy and personal space* when they are in other people's homes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's some really strange black-and-white thinking on this thread.

Not feeling defensively private about "upstairs" =/= being fine with guests "wandering," "roaming," and "snooping."

Exactly. There's a difference between entering because you need to find someone and searching through the medicine cabinet. But this has been pointed out 100 times, and the poster doesn't get it.

If I have gone into my master bathroom you Do Not need to enter my bedroom to "find" me. If I've gone into my bedroom you KNOCK. I will either say "Come in or Just a moment" you don't just barge into my bedroom looking for me.

Do you follow your guests to the powder room and wait outside talking to them through the door while they use it? Come on.

Who says people aren't going to knock? But that's different from banning people from your upper floor.

Why are you so troubled about not having access to your host's upper floor? What right do you, as a guest, have to go up there? Why do you need to go up there? If you have not been invited up there you simply do not go up there. It really is not that hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord. Is this thread still going on? All the people who are neurotic about their personal space just need to lock their doors. Problem solved.

There really are a few very mentally ill posters on this thread. The paranoia about “snooping” is insane.

Name a good reason for being in a host's personal space that requires being there without an invitation or quick permission that doesn't involve some type of sudden illness or truly extraordinary.

Since you have so much time to post, why don’t you read through the prior 26 pages on this thread when tons of examples were provided.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Good lord. Is this thread still going on? All the people who are neurotic about their personal space just need to lock their doors. Problem solved.

There really are a few very mentally ill posters on this thread. The paranoia about “snooping” is insane.

Name a good reason for being in a host's personal space that requires being there without an invitation or quick permission that doesn't involve some type of sudden illness or truly extraordinary.

Since you have so much time to post, why don’t you read through the prior 26 pages on this thread when tons of examples were provided.

I've read every page. There is not one legitimate reason (outside of health or truly emergent issues) where you can't first get quick permission from your host. Not one.