Son and DIL insulting vacation we paid for

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This type of vacation is a dream for OP and her DH, they are older and miss their adult kids. They get to spend a week with the kids and grand kids doing nothing but making memories of how her children come visit.

Reality: It's not much fun for the adult kids. It's stressful and a lot of work if they have little kids.

Maybe OP should cook and clean all week and see if it's still as fun.

So what? Assuming this is true, it doesn’t give people a pass to be rude. Some of y’all were raised in a barn, I swear.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's your kid, you can correct him. "Sorry this free house at the beach doesn't meet your expectations!" is mild but still pointed enough. Or just tell him he's being rude.

No, the vacation was not free for your son and his spouse as they had to provide groceries and meals.

Your son and spouse may think that they are offering constructive criticism, but they are doing so to excess. Just tell them that you understand their criticism and would prefer that any further discussion focus on positive thoughts about the vacation.

The house at the beach is free, as PP pointed out. They are being rude.

In-laws paid 5k, the son and spouse pay groceries and meals for God knows how many people. I’m guessing 2-3k. So paying less, not worth it to me.

The groceries are split between all the other guests, not just the son and DIL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's your kid, you can correct him. "Sorry this free house at the beach doesn't meet your expectations!" is mild but still pointed enough. Or just tell him he's being rude.

No, the vacation was not free for your son and his spouse as they had to provide groceries and meals.

Your son and spouse may think that they are offering constructive criticism, but they are doing so to excess. Just tell them that you understand their criticism and would prefer that any further discussion focus on positive thoughts about the vacation.

The house at the beach is free, as PP pointed out. They are being rude.

In-laws paid 5k, the son and spouse pay groceries and meals for God knows how many people. I’m guessing 2-3k. So paying less, not worth it to me.

The groceries are split between all the other guests, not just the son and DIL.

Who in the world is spending $3k for a week’s worth of groceries??? Are there 50 people there or something?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He's your kid, you can correct him. "Sorry this free house at the beach doesn't meet your expectations!" is mild but still pointed enough. Or just tell him he's being rude.

No, the vacation was not free for your son and his spouse as they had to provide groceries and meals.

Your son and spouse may think that they are offering constructive criticism, but they are doing so to excess. Just tell them that you understand their criticism and would prefer that any further discussion focus on positive thoughts about the vacation.

The house at the beach is free, as PP pointed out. They are being rude.

In-laws paid 5k, the son and spouse pay groceries and meals for God knows how many people. I’m guessing 2-3k. So paying less, not worth it to me.

The groceries are split between all the other guests, not just the son and DIL.

Why/how in the hell are you or anyone spending 2-3k on groceries for a week? That’s A huge exaggeration.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can identify with the OP’s son and DIL. My in-laws like to have a family vacation rental and it happens every 5-6 years. They have middle class tastes even though they have a decent retirement nest egg and income from a generous pension and SS. None of their children’s families are well-off except for my family. Some of the families are struggling. In-laws will spring for a rental, but not airfare so we are relegated to a place within driving distance (5 hours gets complaints) of DMV. One year, they rented a 5 bedroom 2 bath place for 18 people! We had to rotate families to cook all meals. No one wanted to do anything but sit around and drink all day and night. They have the illusion of a close, happy family, but it really isn’t. Having a family “vacation” feeds into their fantasy. I resent these trips because they are not relaxing, we have to take time off from work, and pay for groceries, not to mention cook and clean. It’s not fun for anyone.

ALL OF THIS TIMES A MILLION.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This type of vacation is a dream for OP and her DH, they are older and miss their adult kids. They get to spend a week with the kids and grand kids doing nothing but making memories of how her children come visit.

Reality: It's not much fun for the adult kids. It's stressful and a lot of work if they have little kids.

Maybe OP should cook and clean all week and see if it's still as fun.

+1

Yup. Just because OP troll and OP's friends chiming in don't agree, doesn't make it incorrect.

[Anonymous]

My family has started meeting up at oceanfront resorts with kids clubs and it is so much more vacation-like than piling everyone into the same beach house. We meet up (or not) for meals and activities and everyone has their own space to retreat to.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This type of vacation is a dream for OP and her DH, they are older and miss their adult kids. They get to spend a week with the kids and grand kids doing nothing but making memories of how her children come visit.

Reality: It's not much fun for the adult kids. It's stressful and a lot of work if they have little kids.

Maybe OP should cook and clean all week and see if it's still as fun.

+1

Yup. Just because OP troll and OP's friends chiming in don't agree, doesn't make it incorrect.

Who are you calling a troll, troll? Are you the fiction writer in here?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My family has started meeting up at oceanfront resorts with kids clubs and it is so much more vacation-like than piling everyone into the same beach house. We meet up (or not) for meals and activities and everyone has their own space to retreat to.

+1

This is truly thoughtful - makes the kids happy - isn't it supposed to be about the kids, and happy memories?

Can't have happy memories if the parents of small children are miserable, and can't accommodate only certain people - it hurts other people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My family has started meeting up at oceanfront resorts with kids clubs and it is so much more vacation-like than piling everyone into the same beach house. We meet up (or not) for meals and activities and everyone has their own space to retreat to.

NP and not to get off-topic, but would you please link to a place like this? (I understand if you don’t want to link to the place you go to, I just want a general idea of “scope.”) TIA!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family has started meeting up at oceanfront resorts with kids clubs and it is so much more vacation-like than piling everyone into the same beach house. We meet up (or not) for meals and activities and everyone has their own space to retreat to.

NP and not to get off-topic, but would you please link to a place like this? (I understand if you don’t want to link to the place you go to, I just want a general idea of “scope.”) TIA!

I'm the PP. Our favorite is the Omni Amelia Island Plantation, though we haven't been there since before COVID. You can either stay in the main hotel (with pools and pool bar, spa, kids club) or rent one of the villas on the same property (these are privately owned condos that if you rent through the Omni vs. Airbnb etc., you have access to the hotel amenities). There is a shuttle that runs between the hotel, villas, and on-site shops/restaurants/mini golf/nature center all day and night. This works for our family because we have a mix of people who want to eat all meals out and people who want to cook and eat in, a mix of early risers and night owls, and a mix of parenting styles that makes sharing the same house a no-go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My family has started meeting up at oceanfront resorts with kids clubs and it is so much more vacation-like than piling everyone into the same beach house. We meet up (or not) for meals and activities and everyone has their own space to retreat to.

NP and not to get off-topic, but would you please link to a place like this? (I understand if you don’t want to link to the place you go to, I just want a general idea of “scope.”) TIA!

I'm the PP. Our favorite is the Omni Amelia Island Plantation, though we haven't been there since before COVID. You can either stay in the main hotel (with pools and pool bar, spa, kids club) or rent one of the villas on the same property (these are privately owned condos that if you rent through the Omni vs. Airbnb etc., you have access to the hotel amenities). There is a shuttle that runs between the hotel, villas, and on-site shops/restaurants/mini golf/nature center all day and night. This works for our family because we have a mix of people who want to eat all meals out and people who want to cook and eat in, a mix of early risers and night owls, and a mix of parenting styles that makes sharing the same house a no-go.

Thank you so much! That sounds great!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The rental was "several thousand"...where do you see 5k?

Any beach house for only "several thousand" in the summer time is a dump.

Agree.

OP, post a link to the house rental listing. It won't out you but at least we can judge for ourselves.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The rental was "several thousand"...where do you see 5k?

Any beach house for only "several thousand" in the summer time is a dump.

Agree.

OP, post a link to the house rental listing. It won't out you but at least we can judge for ourselves.

JFC. It doesn’t matter if it’s a dump! It doesn’t matter if you’re not having fun! It doesn’t matter if the curtains are crappy! None of this makes it okay to be rude to your hosts.

I truly hope this is one person trolling because if not, I’m truly embarrassed for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The rental was "several thousand"...where do you see 5k?

Any beach house for only "several thousand" in the summer time is a dump.

Agree.

OP, post a link to the house rental listing. It won't out you but at least we can judge for ourselves.

JFC. It doesn’t matter if it’s a dump! It doesn’t matter if you’re not having fun! It doesn’t matter if the curtains are crappy! None of this makes it okay to be rude to your hosts.

I truly hope this is one person trolling because if not, I’m truly embarrassed for you.

It does matter. I have stayed in gross rentals and it's uncomfortable for me.